Burnout and anxiety are a common diagnosis in today's fast-paced, technologically-driven society. Between working your day job, running your start-up business, maintaining your relationships, and thriving amid a pandemic, there's very little "you" time left, which can cascade into a slew of issues that affect your psychological equilibrium.
Obsessing over your long-ass to-do list, while avoiding said to-do list to scroll through Twitter for seven hours a day, can easily lead to you feeling overwhelmed and mentally scattered.
It's only a matter of time before your psychological distress shows physical symptoms through changes in your appetite, sleep patterns, and your overall mood. The digital age, as beneficial as it can be, has the potential to be just as detrimental to our wellness. And although technology and our to-do list aren't going anywhere, it's important that we learn some proactive methods that help us prioritize our psychological health which, for many of us, begins with mindfulness.
When most people think of the word "mindfulness" they likely picture someone sitting Indian-style in the middle of a forest chanting mantras until they experience some mystical, life-altering experience that grants them access to the wisdom of the cosmos. Although this is a perfectly valid approach to mindfulness, it's not necessarily practical for everyone. There's a common misconception that mindfulness and meditation practices only consist of stillness, breathwork, and silence.
The Best Mindfulness Practice For Your Zodiac Sign
However, it's important that we broaden our idea of this practice, which is ultimately about being more present in our day-to-day experiences to nurture our optimal wellness in mind, body, and spirit. Check out the best mindfulness practice for your zodiac sign:
Aries
GiphyAs one of the most active signs of the zodiac, meditating in a quiet room may not be the most engaging method of mindfulness for you. Action and excitement are what you thrive on and many Aries are known to be naturally gifted athletes, thanks to their ruling planet Mars.
Anyone influenced by the energetic ram is more likely to enjoy active meditations, versus those that require stillness, to release all of that excess energy in a more healthy way that doesn't result in your typical crash and burn.
Prioritizing a regular exercise routine can be just what you need to improve your sense of presence. Sign up for that kickboxing class or join a team sport that allows your inner Amazon goddess free reign to release pent-up frustration while increasing your ability to focus on what's right in front of you.
Taurus
GiphyIf anyone is into kicking back and opting for more stationary mindfulness practices, it would be you. Physiologically, Taurus is associated with the throat, neck, and thyroid. Integrating chants into your meditation can help you maintain balance in mind, body, and spirit. Transcendental meditation is an approach in which words, sounds, and phrases—known as mantras—are repeated for twenty minutes, twice a day.
You can freestyle with this method by simply tuning into your heart to connect with a mantra that works for you or you can write a list prior to meditating that you can read. Our words are powerful and carry a vibration within their own. You're encouraged to tap into the power of spoken word to bring more clarity, peace, and balance into your life.
Gemini
GiphyOne of the zodiac signs that can benefit the most from mindfulness is you, Gemmie. Your ruling planet, Mercury, is associated with the mind and our thoughts. This, along with your mutable nature, can easily lead to you feeling anxious and scattered. Given your naturally inquisitive nature, you're prone to experiencing sensory overload, thanks to your excessive thirst for knowledge, Gemini. Not only is Mercury associated with your thoughts but with your communication as well, particularly related to writing.
Automatic writing can be the perfect technique for you to tap into higher states of consciousness and deeper levels of serenity. You can engage with this practice by simply going into a quiet space and setting the intention for what you'd like to gain from your session, whether it be guidance regarding an important life decision or inspiration for your next work of art.
Cancer
GiphyAs one of the most empathic signs of the zodiac, it's important that you keep your aura and heart clear of discordant energies that you can pick up via your daily interactions. You are known as the caregiver of the zodiac but your giving nature can result in you running yourself ragged for the sake of appeasing others. If you're not careful with balancing your energy, you can wind up resenting the people who aren't grateful or capable of reciprocating your efforts.
With that being said, Loving-Kindness (or Metta) meditation is used to develop an attitude of love and kindness toward everything—yes, that includes your hyper-critical mother-in-law. Start by taking a few deep breaths and envision yourself inhaling compassion into your heart space. Once you're relaxed enough, direct that energy within your heart to someone who needs it or even to the world as a whole. Repeat this meditation regularly to dissolve any bitterness and grief that keeps a wall up between you and others.
Leo
GiphyAs the superstar of the zodiac and the center of the Universe, it's important that you stay charged up so you can continue your quest in taking over the world in your bold, enlivened approach. Leo, your warmth and vitality often makes you a magnet for all kinds of people, making you one of the most popular signs of the zodiac. Although others can regularly benefit from the light that you shine into their lives, you must take time to replenish your vibes for your overall well-being.
Qigong, meaning "life energy cultivation", is a Chinese mindfulness approach that incorporates breathing exercises and slow body movements based on martial arts. There are thousands of Qigong exercises involving numerous kinds of breathing techniques that can energize the body while cultivating the mind and spirit to experience more peace and flow in your life.
Virgo
GiphyIf anyone can use a solid mindfulness practice, it's your Mercury-ruled, analytical ass. We get it, Virgo. You've got the vision, the execution plan, and all of the people who will play a role in your level-up. A lot of your time is spent organizing and planning for the future and you can experience intense bouts of anxiety when you're in workaholic mode. With so many ideas swirling around in your head, it's important that you have a place to record them.
Sticky notes are your best friend providing you with a sense of comfort when you deviate from your regularly scheduled program to carve out some time for yourself. Walking meditation is the perfect mindfulness technique to get you out of the office and into nature. Something as simple as taking a 15-minute walk every day can help clear your mind, settle unhinged emotions, and loosen tension in your body to experience a greater sense of serenity and stability.
Libra
GiphyAs an air sign, you're naturally inclined to live in your mind, and with you being represented by the scales, you've got a tendency to play mental ping pong due to your diplomatic nature. Your ability to see both sides of a situation can be beneficial but sometimes it can be equally overwhelming when it's time to make an important decision. When it comes to your meditation practice, it can seem impossible to quiet the incessant chatter of your mind to receive clear guidance that can help you navigate your life with more trust and flow.
Guided meditation is a great option for shifting your focus from meeting the gazillion deadlines in your planner to grounding yourself in the present moment to experience the calm and clarity that comes from practicing mindfulness. Next time you're feeling on edge, check out YouTube for a guided meditation to bring you back to center.
Scorpio
GiphyLife is already hectic enough attempting to balance your daily demands on top of being one of the most empathic signs of the zodiac. Your heightened sensitivity and psychic awareness make you a magnet for all kinds of energies. Think of yourself like a sponge. As one of the more emotionally centered signs, you run the risk of absorbing other people's feelings, which can have a negative impact on your health and well-being.
Developing a sense of mindfulness about your energy, and those that you come into contact with, can help you determine the difference between what's energetically yours and what's not.
Try a simple candle gazing meditation to not only help you recenter yourself but to also cleanse any negative vibes you've been picking up. If possible, opt for a white candle as it represents purification. As you gaze into the flame, imagine yourself being cleansed of any heavy energies or simply allowing yourself to be completely consumed by the dance of the flame.
Sagittarius
GiphyGiven your mutable, on-the-go energy, an active meditation would serve you best in developing more mindfulness. Physiologically, your zodiac sign is associated with the lower half of the body, particularly the hips and thighs, Sagittarius. Dancing is the perfect meditation for you to recenter your sporadic energy while also releasing the endorphins you need to remain your usual optimistic, joyful self.
There's no coincidence that dancing is associated with the Sacral chakra. This particular chakra also governs how you process emotions, making dance an extremely cathartic, transcendental experience for you. Whenever life gets too stressful or heavy, turn on your favorite playlist and let loose. Fully being lost in the moment is exactly what mindfulness is all about.
Capricorn
GiphyThere's a lot of pressure being the boss and your goal-oriented approach to life can leave little time to reconnect with your zen. Your ruling planet Saturn can make you rigid when it comes to the structures in place in your life, making it important to develop a little more flexibility. Aches and pain resulting from stress are even more common for you as an earth sign, emphasizing the importance of physical activity that can ease the tension in your body.
Yoga has been practiced for many centuries and has been proven to reduce pain, depression, and anxiety. Now that the weather is warming up, this is a good time to grab your mat and hit your local yoga at the park class.
Aquarius
GiphyWho said meditation has to be some elaborate, time-consuming ritual that you partake in to simply gain some peace of mind in the midst of the chaos? Life is constantly throwing things at us and although we don't necessarily have a say in every single thing that comes our way, we do have power over our response to these unnerving experiences. Physiologically, Aquarius is associated with the circulatory system, making it super important for you to pay attention to your breathing.
Breath awareness meditation is one of the most common, and easy, ways to meditate because it actually gives you something to focus on during a quiet moment of pause and reflection. The goal is to simply focus on your breathing. You can engage with this process by counting your breath. Whenever your mind wanders off elsewhere, gently reel it back in and start counting from one again as you breathe in and out. Keep track of how many breaths you can take without getting distracted and monitor your progress over the course of a month to see if mindfulness is becoming easier for you.
Pisces
GiphyAs the most imaginative sign of the zodiac, the best mindfulness technique for you isn't too far away from your usual, extended bouts of daydreaming that you do throughout your day. Visualization meditation is a powerful tool that even the most novice mindfulness student can master. Not only can this method be used to manifest your dream job or the love of your life, but your overall health and well-being can benefit from this practice as well.
Prior to starting your day, spend five minutes in bed imagining how you would like your day to go. If possible, amp up the mindfulness by tapping into the sensations of smell, taste, touch, and sound as you visualize your day ahead. Practice this on a regular basis to cultivate a clearer vision for your life and greater optimism to help you overcome any obstacles that you may face along the way.
Featured image by Getty Images
Originally published on May 8, 2019
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Exclusive: Melanie Fiona On Making High-Vibrational Music & Saying Yes To Partnership
Melanie Fiona is back! After taking a little more than a decade-long hiatus, she has officially made her return to music and blessed us with two singles, “Say Yes” and “I Choose You.” While both singles are very different from each other, they both reflect who she is today and the type of music she wants to make. In our conversation, the mom of two expressed what she learned during her time away.
“It's interesting, even when I said it is like coming back, I don't ever feel like I really left because I was always still performing. I've still been public. It's not like I went into being this recluse person or version of myself, but the thing that I really learned in this process is that I think things take time,” Melanie says in a xoNecole exclusive.
“I think often we're so caught up in it, being on the timing of demand or popularity, or, like, striking while the iron is hot and the thing that I've learned is that everything is on God's time. That's it. Every time I thought I would have been ready, or, like, things were taking too long, I had to reship some things, personally, professionally, in my life. I also gave myself permission to make a living, not just make a living, but make a life for myself.”
Making a life for herself included getting married to Grammy-nominated songwriter Jared Cotter, starting a family, and embracing new landscapes, such as podcasting as a co-host of The Mama’s Den podcast. She also began doing more spiritual work and self-care practices like meditation, sound healing, Reiki, acupuncture, and boundary setting, which allowed her to get in touch with her inner voice.
“I wasn't putting out music, and I wasn't experiencing a number one record, but I was being a number one mom,” she says.
“I was experiencing things that were allowing me to heal and get in touch with myself so that I could make new music from a space of joy and freedom, and excitement again because I definitely feel like I did lose some excitement because of just politics and industry and what it can do to your mental health and even your physical health. So giving myself the space to really just say, ‘Hey, it's okay. Everything's right on time.’”
The joy and excitement are felt in one of two new singles, “I Choose You,” which is more of a lovers rock vibe, a tribute to Melanie’s Caribbean roots. While the Grammy award-winner is known for ballads like “It Kills Me” and “Fool For You,” she is becoming more intentional about the music she makes, calling it high-vibrational music. She says her music is a “reflection of my life,” as it captures every facet, from hanging out with friends to riding around in her car.
“Say Yes” has the classic R&B vibe Melanie is known for. However, both songs are inspired by her relationship. Melanie and Jared got married in December 2020, and the Toronto-bred artist dished on their relationship. Fun fact: he is featured in the “Say Yes” music video.
“When we first started dating, I had come into that relationship post a lot of self-work. I had gotten out of a long-term relationship, I had a year and a half to date and be by myself and do a lot of work on myself alone. And when we met, I remember feeling like this has to be my person because I feel it,” she says.
“And so when we went into that relationship, and we started dating, I was very clear. I was like, I know what I want. I'm very clear on what I need, and I'm not going to withhold my truth about myself in this process because of pride or fear of rejection. I know you love me, but I'm coming with my heart in my hand to let you know that if we're gonna get there, we have to put fear aside and say yes. So that was kind of like my open letter to him, which is why the video is us having a conversation.”
Melanie also shares that saying yes to her partner has empowered her in many ways, including motherhood and showing up for herself. Her new EP, also titled Say Yes, will be available at the top of 2025.
Check out the full interview below.
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From $80K To $174K: The 10 Moves I Made To Double My Income & Transform My Career
Climbing the corporate ladder may not be for everyone. For me, it presents an opportunity to enhance my visibility as an experienced communicator, foster professional development, network, explore diverse job opportunities, and, most importantly, financial rewards.
In the last two years, I have focused on increasing my salary and positioning myself to get into the C-suite. Over the course of my 12-year professional career, mentors and job opportunities have bolstered my advancement from a media relations specialist to a senior manager. I started in a junior position at $80,000 annually; now, I make $174,000 ($150,000 + $24,000 bonus and stock options). After years of being unemployed and underemployed, I was finally reaping the benefits of my hard work.
Here are the 10 ways I increased my salary.
1.Know Your Worth
Understanding your market value is the first step. I regularly researched industry salary trends and adjusted my expectations accordingly. Websites like Glassdoor and LinkedIn Salary Insights were invaluable. Once you know the average salary, add tax. After accepting a salary, it is less likely you’ll see a substantial increase outside of your annual raise unless you take another role within the company.
2.Leverage Negotiations
I accepted the $80K specialist role because I knew it was a good starting salary that would increase over time. Each subsequent job offer was an opportunity to negotiate. I emphasized my growing skill set, achievements, and the unique value I could bring to the company. You can do this by providing clear examples of problem-solving and cost-saving methods you led.
3.Continuous Learning
I never stopped learning. I took courses, attended workshops, and earned certifications relevant to communications. This not only broadened my expertise but also made a compelling case during salary reviews. Your company may offer some of these options for free through LinkedIn Learning or internal professional development platforms. Other companies may have discretionary funds to use for external conferences and other tools to increase your skills.
4.Advocate Internally
While I've never experienced an internal promotion, I do know they can play a significant role in increasing your salary. Whether it’s an open position or you have reached a peak in your current role and are ready for more responsibility, make your case by highlighting your contributions, leadership qualities, and readiness for more opportunities.
5.Seek New Opportunities
Sometimes, moving up means moving out. I applied for external roles that aligned with my career goals, which ultimately led me to my current position.
In two years, I changed jobs twice, increasing my salary and benefits, like a sign-on bonus, each time. Changing jobs can often result in a significant salary bump.
6.Build a Strong Network
Networking is crucial. Mentors and professional connections provided guidance, support, and sometimes job leads. They helped me understand the industry landscape and how to position myself. In the words of Issa Rae, network across with your peers, because there are so many gems to learn from everyone.
7.Be Assertive
In my 30s, I have gained the confidence I lacked as a new graduate entering the professional field in my 20s. Now, I not only know what I want, but I ask for it too. I am a firm believer in the power of the tongue. I inform the recruiter and hiring manager of my compensation and career expectations at the onset to avoid wasting time. It’s essential to communicate your worth confidently.
8.Demonstrate Impact
Quantify your achievements. I kept a record of my successes—campaign results, project completions, and any metrics that demonstrated my impact. This data was crucial during salary negotiations and performance reviews.
9.Stay Resilient
Rejections and setbacks are part of the journey. I faced my share of both, but each experience was a learning opportunity. Staying resilient and focused on my goals kept me moving forward. Most importantly, remember you are not alone.
10.Embrace Your Journey
Every step of my journey was a testament to perseverance, continuous growth, and strategic self-advocacy. Your career path might be different, but the principles of knowing your worth, continuous learning, and assertive negotiation remain the same.
In this journey, I’ve learned that advocating for yourself is not just about negotiating a salary—it’s about recognizing your value, continuously improving, and being unafraid to chase your goals. You deserve to thrive in your career, and with these strategies, you can achieve the salary and role you aspire to.
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