There's an old quote by author and sales strategist Tom Hopkins that says, "You are your greatest asset. Put your time, effort, and money into training, grooming, and encouraging your greatest asset." Simply put, invest in yourself. So many of us are busy constantly investing and pouring into our spouses, our kids, and our jobs that we forget all about ourselves. You probably read that and thought to yourself that you are obligated to invest in the kids, the job, and the spouse. You're right. But that should be at the expense of yourself and certainly not before you invest in yourself. Investing in yourself will help you best serve others.
32 Powerful Ways to Invest In Yourself
Sure, it may take some practice and change of mindset, but the good news is that you can start small and start right now. Here are more than 30 ways you can begin investing in yourself today:
1.Exercise Regularly
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Exercising regularly is a sure way to create not only a healthy body but also a healthy mind. Beginning an exercise routine can seem daunting at first but try not to get intimidated. There are so many different ways to exercise. You can walk, jog, lift weights, do yoga, Pilates, or even jump rope. Start slow and gradually build up. Be creative and have fun!
2.Therapy
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While exercising can certainly help you concentrate and feel mentally sharp, there will inevitably be times in all of our lives that we need to talk to a professional. Therapy is one of those things that I think everyone should try at least once in their lives. The benefits are numerous.
3.Create a Side Hustle
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The great Warren Buffet (whose net worth is more than $86 billion) once said that you should never depend on a single income. In other words, multiple streams of income are the move! I know people who have a second (and sometimes third) stream of income doing everything from tutoring, to writing, to event planning, to interior decorating. If you're not sure where to start, take some time to think about what you're passionate about and start there.
4.Find a Mentor
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So, you've identified your passion. Now what? If you're at a loss as to what the next step should be, it might be beneficial to find a mentor who is an expert in that area. You'd be surprised who would be willing to share their knowledge and experiences. For some, you might have to pay for their services because mentoring could very well be their side hustle.
5.Learn a New Language
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As the world becomes more and more diverse, learning a new language has never been more necessary. The great news is that you can learn a new language right from the comfort of your home and what better time than now to start since we're all spending more time than usual in the house? Resources like Rosetta Stone and Babbel offer online language courses for as low as $6 a month.
6.Travel
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When most people hear the word travel, they immediately think it requires traveling out of the country. However, with COVID-19 still running rampant and so many people out of work as a result, that may not be feasible for everyone right now. Lucky for you, travel does not have to be expensive. You can start small by taking a road trip or even exploring your own city. Travel is more about new experiences than the destination. If you want to travel out of the country, start a travel fund so you can save up and show off that second language you learned!
7.Pay Off Debt
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This is one of the most freeing experiences ever. Being in a ton of debt can cause stress, depression, and anxiety. A popular way to pay off debt is with the debt snowball method which means you pay off your debts in order from smallest to largest. You pay more than the minimum amount due on the smallest debt and pay the minimum amount due on all other debt. Once you have paid off the smallest debt, you move on to the next smallest. Author Dave Ramsey explains more about how the debt snowball works here. Minimizing debt and being debt-free reduces stress, improves your credit score, and gives you financial security.
8.Create a Budget
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The word budget probably makes you want to roll your eyes, or it may even trigger a bit of anxiety. It shouldn't. Think of a budget as simply a plan for what you're going to do with your money. That's it. Creating a budget can help you save money, meet your financial goals, and stop wasting money. Once you stop spending $150 a month on coffee, you'll thank yourself.
9.Start a Savings Account
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Already have one? Perfect! Now start putting money in that thing! Seriously, pick an amount and commit to adding that to your savings each time you get paid. You can start small if you have to and gradually increase. Trust me, it will add up.
10.Buy a Plant
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Plants are not only aesthetically pleasing and sure to make any space look better but they are good for you too. Plants can remove air pollutants as well as help give your immune system a little boost. With flu season right around the corner and COVID-19 still looming, we could all use an immune system boost. If you're worried about not having a green thumb, check out our article to learn more about houseplants that are easy to care for and don't require a green thumb here.
11.Practice Meditation
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With everything going on in the world today, it's easy for any one of us to become stressed. This is where meditation comes in. It just requires a little practice and can be done virtually anywhere. According to Headspace, meditation is not about turning off your thoughts or feelings but learning to observe them. Consistency, not perfection, is key when learning to meditate. The more you practice, the better you will become at it.
12.Schedule a Doctor's Appointment
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At least once a year, you should be going to your doctor and getting a check-up. This will help your doctor determine the general status of your health. A yearly physical is also a good time to ask questions or discuss any changes that you may have noticed in your body.
13.Perform a Breast Self-Exam
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It's quick and painless, so no excuses ladies! Early detection is key. It's so important that you do a self-exam on your breast regularly so that you will get to know what is normal for you. That way you are immediately alerted when something is abnormal.
14.Practice Gratitude
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The benefits of practicing gratitude are endless. I'll keep it short and sweet though, it just feels good. Let me give you an example. A few weeks ago, I had to get some car repairs. When the service technician called me with the total, he told me it was $3,800 to fix my car. I immediately got upset. Of course, that was not a good feeling. But then I took a moment and thought about how a few years ago I would not have had the money to fix my car. Then I thought about how I currently had the money sitting in my savings account to get my car fixed, and I immediately switched to a spirit of gratitude. I instantly felt better and grateful.
15.Learn a New Recipe
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Adding just one new recipe to your arsenal every few months will improve your cooking skills, offer you more variety, and even save you money. Cooking also allows you to create healthy meals at home and you can feel satisfied that you know exactly what you are putting into your body. So whether you invest in a cookbook or scour the web, make an effort to learn a new recipe at least every couple of months.
16.Get More Sleep
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Not getting enough sleep not only makes you cranky the next morning but it can also be detrimental to your concentration and even your health. Likewise, getting more sleep makes you feel sharper and boosts your immune system. Try going to bed just an hour earlier and feel the difference.
17.Stop Procrastinating
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Procrastination is something that we're all guilty of doing a time or two (or five) in our lives. It can seem easier to put off the things we need to do until later, but it's actually easier to just dig in and get them done. You'll feel less stressed and more accomplished after you do. Lifehack shares 11 steps you can take to stop procrastinating:
- Break your work into little steps.
- Change your environment.
- Create a detailed timeline with specific deadlines.
- Eliminate your procrastination pit stops.
- Hang out with people who inspire you to take action.
- Get a buddy.
- Tell others about your goals.
- Seek out someone who has already achieved the outcome.
- Re-clarify your goals.
- Stop overcomplicating things.
- Get a grip and just do it.
18.Get a Massage
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Massages used to be considered a luxury, but over the years they have become a treatment modality for stress and pain reduction. You can get a massage anywhere from the airport to the spa at many different price points. Don't wait until a special occasion. Get one now!
19.Create a Skincare Routine
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Like most things in life, it is easier to prevent damage to your skin than to try to fix the damage that has already occurred. This is why it is so important to create a skincare routine and stick with it. Simple things like washing your face at night, wearing sunscreen, and keeping your face moisturized are key to great skin. If you need help developing a skincare routine talk to a dermatologist or esthetician.
20.Get Life Insurance
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I know that we don't like to think about our mortality but it is so important. Even a small policy can help protect your family and bring your loved ones peace of mind. If the thought of it all has you confused, Fidelity has a great summary here that will help clarify things for you.
21.Create a Morning Routine
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A strong morning routine sets the tone for your day and can help you have a more productive day. A strong routine is going to look different for each of us. It's about what works for you and that's the beauty of it. It's your routine. The routine that helps you be your best self. If you know that scrolling through social media as soon as you open your eyes in the morning makes you feel bad, then cut it out. Instead, try replacing social media scrolling with something that makes you feel good like journaling, setting intentions, or working out.
22.Take a Class
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There are classes available for anything you can think of whether it's boxing, makeup, painting, or writing. You name it, there is probably a class for it. Taking a class is a fun way to discover new passions and enrich existing ones.
23.Declutter
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I don't know about you, but having a lot of clutter in my house causes me to feel overwhelmed, which is why every few months I make sure to declutter. I don't have a set schedule. I just do it as I feel the need arises. I go through my closets, my drawers, or my kitchen and either get rid of things or organize them. Afterward, I feel like I've decluttered my mind a bit and can breathe better.
24.Invest Your Money
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Investing your money is very much an investment in yourself. Financial expert, Chanel Scott's advice to younger generations is to start investing early. If you don't consider yourself to be a part of the younger generation, don't worry. It's never too late to start investing. Do your research, find the way that works best for you, and get started.
25.Write In a Journal
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People journal for different reasons, but I think that everyone who does it would agree that it does wonders for their mental health. Journaling is a healthy way to get all the thoughts out of your head and onto paper, subsequently helping with self-expression, anxiety, and even promoting self-reflection.
26.Network
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I guarantee that some of the world's most successful people got that way in part by networking. Networking is a powerful tool with endless benefits. It opens the doors for new opportunities and can put your name in rooms you haven't even stepped foot in yet. Thanks to COVID-19, you may not be able to do a lot of in-person networking but thankfully virtual events and social media sites like LinkedIn provide opportunities for you to connect with like-minded people.
27.Forgive
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Let me preface this one by saying that forgiveness does not mean that you forget nor does it mean that you keep toxic people around you. Forgiveness simply means that you release the energy of anger and resentment and instead usher in the energy of forgiveness, acceptance, and letting go. Forgiveness is for you, not other people, so whether they are deserving of forgiveness doesn't matter. Do it for yourself.
28.Drink More Water
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How much water you should drink a day is debatable and largely depends on who you ask, but one thing that is not up for debate is that water is undoubtedly good for you. Water promotes skin health, regulates body temperature, and flushes waste from the body just to name a few of the benefits. Start small by drinking at least a glass a day and gradually increase your intake. Trust me, your body will thank you.
29.Read a Book
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Reading a book can be a beautiful escape or a way to expand your knowledge. It doesn't matter if it is fiction, non-fiction, or self-help, reading builds vocabulary, helps to prevent cognitive decline, and improves focus and concentration. Buying or checking out books, not your thing? No worries, download an audiobook and sit back, relax, and escape.
30.Set a Goal
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And then crush it! It can be big or small—it doesn't matter. What's important is that you work toward meeting that goal. Setting and meeting goals give you such a feeling of accomplishment. Once you meet a goal, set another one. It will quickly become a lifestyle.
31.Take a "Me" Day
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With all of the things that you have to do on a daily basis, it can seem like there aren't enough hours in a day making a "me day" seem pretty impossible to achieve but that is exactly why it is so important to take one. If you absolutely, positively can't take a whole day, try to at least take a few hours. Go to the places that you love and do the things that you love to do—or do nothing at all.
32.Love Yourself
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Most people will verbally tell you that, of course, they love themselves, but do our actions reflect that self-proclaimed self-love? Do we pour into ourselves? Do we honor ourselves? Do we show up as our best selves? Truly loving yourself is one of the best ways to invest in yourself. The best part is that it is priceless.
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Erica Green is a Clinical Research Associate, blogger, and a sneakerhead. She has a love for all things women and she's pretty sure that women are God's greatest creation. Connect with her on Instagram @ erica_britt_ or www.lovethegspot.com
The Mecca Of Fashion: The Top Street Style Moments At Howard Homecoming
Outfits were planned, bags were packed, and cameras were ready to capture Howard University's collegiate spirit during its centennial Homecoming celebration. Not only does it hold the number one ranking as the most elite Historically Black College and University or its top performing academics, diversity of students and alumni, but the HBCU also leaves a legacy of style and grace.
The essence of effortless poise and refinement shines bright through the iconic university colors of indigo blue, red, and white. Every October, Howard University students, alumni, staff, and friends gather on the prestigious campus in Washington, D.C. to take part in time-honored traditions and events, which is Homecoming. This year's theme, “The Meccaverse,” was a week-long celebration of Howard University’s heritage, including the Homecoming football game and Bison Pep Rally, the Fashion Show, Greek Life Step Show, Homecoming Day of Service, Lavender Reception, and the iconic Yard Fest Concert.
As 2024 marked the 100th anniversary of the Howard Bison trek back to The Mecca and after two years of virtual events due to the COVID-19 pandemic, this was to be a celebration of a lifetime. We enlisted HU alumnus Sharmaine Harris, a luxury retail buyer, as she revisited her alma mater as eyes on the yard for fashion-forward outfits mixed with personal style and campus pride for the weeklong celebration.
Before we get to the looks, discover how attending Howard University impacted her career in fashion and her day-to-day style:
Credit: Sharmaine and Friends
xoNecole: Describe your personal style. Did attending Howard have any impact on developing it?
Sharmaine: Howard taught me that there’s no such thing as being TOO dressed. There’s always a reason to “put it on” and look presentable, even if it’s just for a day of classes. Standing out was celebrated and encouraged with my peers embracing the opportunity, giving me the confidence to try new styles and trends.
xoNecole: How did Howard shape your career as a luxury buyer?
Sharmaine: I studied Fashion Merchandising, through which I was fortunate to have professors who were very connected to the industry and able to give first-hand accounts of opportunities and what to expect post-college. I was also able to build a network through my peers and other Howard Alum, which has opened doors to endless possibilities both within fashion as well as daily life.
The same confidence instilled in me through my style has also been rooted deeply within me as I step into any role or project I’m faced with throughout my career.
xoNecole: This year marked Howard’s 100th-anniversary Homecoming celebration. Can you describe what the weekend looked and felt like?
Sharmaine: I’ve gone to many Howard Homecomings since graduating, but this year’s 100th anniversary felt like a huge family reunion filled with nothing but love. It was beautiful to see so many Bison return home looking great and radiating joy. It was beautiful!
xoNecole: What makes Howard fashion different from other HBCUs?
Sharmaine: Being that Howard is The Mecca, we have such a diverse population with each individual having their own spin on fashion. Getting dressed is second nature for us, but the layered confidence is our secret ingredient to make any look come together. Through that comfortability to push barriers, we have a legacy of setting trends, as indicated by the many alumni we have in the fashion and entertainment industry.
Keep scrolling for the top street style moments from The Mecca's Homecoming weekend:
Credit: Lacey Gallagher
Credit: Alan Henderson
Credit: JaLynn Davis
Credit: Dylan Davis
Credit: Caleb Smith
Credit: Kendall W.
Credit: Jordyn Finney
Credit: Vanessa Nneoma
Credit: Dr. Mariah Sankey-Thomas
Credit: Caleb MacBruce
Credit: Tiffany Battle
Credit: Teniola
Credit: Ilahi Creary
Credit: Nicolas Ryan Grant
Credit: Dylan Davis
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Featured image courtesy of Sharmaine Harris
Girls' Trips & Group Pics: Are We Losing The Essence Of Friendship In The Age Of Social Media?
A few months ago, I found myself on social media, scrolling, and came across a video of a bunch of friend groups taking girls' trips and felt an uncomfortable amount of jealousy and, if I'm honest, also sadness.
My friends and I are all in different places in our lives and haven’t traveled together in almost a decade. In undergrad, I went on spring break with friends, and in my very early twenties, I experienced a few trips with individual friends, but these friend groups that travel together can’t relate lol, and I’m not going to lie, it bothers me because I’ve always wanted that.
At first, that reality made me a little emotional, and I was brought to tears until I saw the comment section with responses like “Step one, find friends first” or “Does anyone else not have friends who like to travel?” While I found solace in that and have since understood the importance of travel groups, making friends with women who love to travel and have the schedule for it, and appreciating my friendship groups for what they are, I now wonder, overall, if social media making us compare our friendships in the same ways that we compare our romantic relationships?
Somewhere along the way, have we lost the plot? Is there friendship and connection outside of meeting up at the hottest new restaurant, girls' trip where we all wear the same outfits, or dinner parties with color schemes (not judging any of these choices, because I love them all), what about the friends that come over to give you a hug when you’ve had a bad day? Where are the friends who will run errands with you? Where are the friends who will give you their Finsta password to find out if your man has a side chick? Where are the friends who show up to your kids' sporting events?
Growing up with shows like Living Single and Girlfriends, we had the blueprint and somehow have missed the mark. We love to discuss the impact of these shows and how they made us feel seen - but do we hang out at each other's houses? Do we embrace friends who don't dress like us? Or are we only interested in friends who fit a certain aesthetic or are exactly like us?
In search of the truth and various perspectives, we’ve talked with 16 Black women for their points of view on whether they believe social media impacts friendships and if it’s made some friendships superficial.
Lisa, NJ:
Many of my closest friends are not on social media, however, the friends that are don’t respond to things unless (to me) they are concerned about something when they read into a post. Then I get a call like, “Hey girl, are you okay, I saw your post." Or they will be ringing my doorbell…even if they are still living in the Bronx. There are a core group of friends that we check in on a few times per month and meet up but for the ones that are on social media, it seems like I’m the only one that sends cards and reaches out more.
To me, they let social media be their only form of contact unless something serious is going on, sadly. They send greetings on social media, yet I still do both if you are a friend, that’s just me, and they know it… Sometimes, social media can be an easy way to avoid that old-school outreach. But let them need prayer even if I haven’t spoken to them in months. I'll just pray and love every moment.
Courtney, RI:
I do believe socials have an impact on friendships that make them “appear” superficial— however, I don’t want to believe that beautifully documented moments equal superficial friendships. I think some of the best moments with girlfriends aren’t always pretty and well-documented. BUT. There are times when I do capture things with my friends for social media specifically, and those are some rock-solid relationships - we are just cute. And outside. And y’all need to see us, lol.
JT, NC:
Social media has helped me connect with friends since relocating, however, while battling a chronic condition and sharing the deeply personal things I share about panic attacks and my pain, it triggers a lot of people, usually those closest to me. Meanwhile, I have strangers in my DMs daily praising the work I do and telling me I need a bigger platform. It breaks my heart when those I once loved rip me apart solely for being honest. I also think people put way too much thought into what people post instead of just having a real convo about what is really triggering [them] deep down.
Jennifer, NY:
In my opinion, a lot of friendships have become superficial - quite frankly, a lot of women are starting to look alike! There's nothing wrong with sharing posts, keeping your page a certain way, documenting while you are out, etc., but I have noticed many friendships have become "let's go here so we can get good pics" and less about building a bond.
Petulia, NJ:
I feel like social media makes friendships seem like they’re not adequate enough by the display that certain people have. It makes people feel like if they’re not giving out lavish gifts, they’re not good enough friends. If they’re not doing expensive dinners, things like that but friendships are more than that.
Courtney, NJ:
I think, in general, social media has played a role in how friendships are viewed! I think people see the glitz and the glam of friendships that people post however, they don’t see the times when you’re not talking… where there might be friction (women being women)… when you lose touch (life be life-ing), etc. I think that is what people don’t see and don’t really show the honesty in friendships on social media.
Quadira, NJ:
So I’ve always battled with valuing friendships since I was a kid. One, I would blame the fact that I moved a lot, so whenever I actually developed a friendship with someone, and we got close within a year or two, I had to move, and after a while, that just made me no longer wanna get close with people. And I was always satisfied with having a bunch of siblings and cousins as my friends. So I would have maybe one friend each school year, and I was okay with that.
I never really got to experience like a core group of girlfriends until I was in the 11th grade, and even then, I saw them as disposable and replaceable, but not in a mean girl way. I was just detached from the idea of long-lasting friendships. And I think that it took a toll on me throughout my college years because I would watch everyone have a group of friends that they stuck with for all four years and saw how they built their lives together after college, and I just feel like I missed out on that.
EF Volart/Getty Images
Social media has definitely made me feel a lot of FOMO, like I denied myself something so special by not putting value in building friendships. The cute pictures with friends were something that drove my FOMO, but I feel like it was misguided because I didn’t really understand what it took for people to have these moments with each other for so long OR that some of these photos really didn’t represent a healthy friendship.
But now I have that understanding, and my on-and-off social media moments with my friends don’t always look so aesthetically pleasing because it is authentic to the kind of friendship that we built with each other and does not mirror what other folks got going on.
Like me and my best friend have more crazy-looking FaceTime screenshots of each other than posed pictures. Because that’s just who we are and that’s what puts a smile on our faces looking back at those FaceTime screenshots rather than pictures intended for social media.
Beata, NJ:
I think social media could be a good thing for friendships in that it gives you gathering ideas, recs for places to go, and overall sometimes content that makes you appreciate the tribe you do have when you see it sort of reflected in front of you and can relate. I think some people have even found valued friendships through social media that they may otherwise wouldn’t have found in the “real world.” However, we know that with all things social media - there’s also that downside.
Sometimes, things can feel performative, one could wonder if people are reaching out to hang out because they see you posting a certain lifestyle and want parts or if they’re genuinely looking to connect. There’s also that notion of comparison, which we know can be the thief of joy. Maybe you don’t have that many friends or that core group, and because of what’s being portrayed on social media, you feel bad about what you do have because it doesn’t look the same.
Sade Danielle:
My personal experience is quite the opposite. I think social media has allowed my friendships to strengthen. As we get older, move away, and have limited time because of other responsibilities, social media has kept us together and even motivates us to plan trips, go to events, or just give kind reminders that we can stay connected through content we find and share.
Denise, NY:
I think social media hasn’t made it superficial, but I do think it has made it lack depth and a sense of responsibility.
Daneyah, LA:
I am a huge girls' girl and love all of my friends for who they are as individuals. One thing that has stood out to me is not depending on one friend for everything, as different friendships have different values and bring different things to the table! Yes, I feel like friends engage with each other socially based on time and proximity.
Because I live so far from most of my friend groups, we lean on socials to stay connected, share memes/relatable content, as well as support each other from afar! It’s definitely helped me stay connected. But I can also see the counter of that, where people see friend groups on social media and get attached to the facade but not the work that goes into nourishing those friendships behind the scenes.
Destiny, NJ:
Yes, I believe friendships have become so superficial based on social media and aesthetics. For instance, I’ve observed in my own personal friendships some friends will gravitate to people who have more of a social media following and what is trending on social media. Wanting to go to certain places and do certain things to adhere to a trend rather than just pulling up on your girls to talk. It becomes hurtful, too, when you have your core group of friends, and the group chat goes cold because you can't ever align schedules, but you see them with people who may fit more of an aesthetic.
Nashima, OH:
Social media has significantly shaped my friendships, making it easier to connect with friends no matter the distance. I enjoy sharing updates and experiences through posts and messages, which helps me feel closer to them. However, I've also noticed that it can lead to misunderstandings, as tone can be easily misinterpreted in text. Additionally, seeing friends highlights can sometimes evoke feelings of jealousy or exclusion. Jealousy in the sense I am missing out because I am states away.
While I appreciate the convenience of staying in touch, I often find that online interactions lack the depth of face-to-face conversations. Balancing social media with real-life connections is important for me to truly strengthen those friendships. Overall, social media plays a crucial role in my relationships, but it's essential to prioritize meaningful communication alongside it.
Justine, NJ:
I think social media affects friendships negatively because it offers a false sense of connection. It is nice to see photos or relatable memes that friends post, but it doesn’t give us an inside view of how they are really doing. It can be used as a tool to stay in the loop, but true connection involves vulnerability and impersonal encounters; both are missing from social media.
Jaylon, PA:
Social media has certainly impacted friendships in a number of ways. On one hand, I believe it’s made it harder to have true, deep, and long-standing connections as we compare ourselves and lives to the lifestyle content we see online. But it also has allowed us to connect with people who have similar interests all around the world.
Ebony, NJ:
I don't feel like social media plays a part in my friendship but I can see the benefits and negative impacts. Social media has been a way to celebrate with friends that I haven’t seen and see if they're going on an amazing vacation, getting married, or if they're opening up their own business, so I do find that it gives me opportunities to still be present even if I can't physically show up.
Sometimes, there are negative impacts of social media, especially as Black women. When we’re looking at content comparing our lives, there's so many curated situations on social media, so it may feel like, "Oh my friendship doesn't look like this," so then comparison sets in.
No matter where you fall whether you’ve found yourself comparing your friendships, felt alone, have a strong group of friends, or none at all, remember this - you are worthy of friendship.
Maskot/Getty Images
Every connection and friendship I have, from my best friends from high school and college to my friends I’ve met as a creator and entrepreneur, brings something unique to my life, and I truly believe that we can celebrate our old friends while embracing the opportunity to make new ones.
It’s important to realize that growth doesn’t mean leaving people behind; instead, it can enrich our lives in ways we never imagined. It’s absolutely possible to cultivate new friendships while holding onto the ones that have been with you through thick and thin. Each relationship adds a different flavor to our lives, and there’s power in allowing ourselves the space to expand our circles without losing the love for those who have always been there.
So, let’s embrace change, appreciate the different paths we take, and honor the friendships that shape our journeys, old and new.
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