Quantcast
The Boss Girl’s Guide to Therapy

The Boss Girl’s Guide to Therapy

When it comes to our mental health, there is no shortcut.

Wellness

When we want our bodies to be toned, we head to the gym. If we need our nails and toes to be weekend-ready, we pay a visit to our local nail technician. But when we experience trauma, break-ups, life transitions, or painful memories, we tend to push them to the far corners of our mind and do our best to forget about it. Push it down, repress, and keep your chin up, give it to God.

But when it come to mental health, there is no shortcut.

The only way to a better you is through by doing the work. Working on your mental health is an important part, not just in growing up, but in seeking partnerships. If marriage and family is part of your future plan, then going to therapy should be on your current to-do list.

The taboo associated with therapy in the black community is beginning to melt away, thanks to the rise in self-care awareness. But where do you begin?

Here's a little guide to get you get started.

Know Your Mission

Keep in mind you shouldn't ever wait until you've reached a point of burn-out or emotional breakdown to find a therapist. It could be post-break or pre-two-weeks-notice, ask for support around transition. If you've never attended therapy sessions, you're more than overdue. Consider your first session a nail shop appointment for your soul.

Do Your Research

Having a new therapist is like starting a new relationship. There's a period in the beginning that will be focused on getting to know who you are and where you've been that may feel like an awkward first date if you settle in with the wrong therapist. It has to be a fit, so do your research.

Websites like Therapy For Black Girls, founded by Dr. Joy Harden Bradford, offers provider listings and a guide for starting therapy. The Sad Girl's Club is loaded with helpful blog posts all about mental health - which is a good place to start.

Find A System That Fits Your Life

Therapy has come a long way since our parents' days. There are options for people who have specific goals and lifestyles to consider. For example, if time is a problem for you, there are convenient apps like Talk Space that offer daily texts, video, or voice sessions with a therapist, even a few times a day depending on the plan you choose.

Know The Difference Between Therapy & Life Coaching

I remember my biggest gripe about therapy when I first began was that the therapist did way more listening than talking and it was unnerving. After a while, I got used to it and enjoyed the space to speak freely about what was on my mind, but it's important to know that most therapists tend to be that way. If you want a more active and involved process, you might consider finding a life coach instead.

Supplement Your Self-Healing Journey

Going to see a therapist or life coach isn't the only route to healing. There are a lot of books and podcasts that can help keep you on the right path by dropping daily gems available at your convenience. Podcasts such as Black Girl in Om center around emotional and mental wellness, as well as physical health. If starting therapy is changing your diet, then books and podcasts can be like taking a daily vitamin.

Keep A Record

If you have ten minutes to check Twitter, you can make ten minutes to check in with yourself. Try using the voice memo feature on your phone and recording check-in messages highlighting how you feel that day, how therapy has possibly made you think differently, and what challenged you want to bring up in your next session.

It's also a great tool for understanding yourself more. There's something about listening to yourself talk that makes you much more aware of what you're talking about.

Be Okay With What Comes Out

The most important part of starting therapy is to allow yourself emotional space to feel vulnerable. The process of digging into your past or into a situation that was painful can open up a window that can let out a lot of feelings perhaps you were keeping inside. Instead of pushing them away, work on embracing them. Until you accept whatever pain or emotions you have within, it will be impossible to let them go completely. And letting go is the entire point.

Whatever your therapy journey looks like, remember you're not alone. We're all fairly new to this self-care thing. There's plenty of support waiting for you on the other side of whatever has been keeping you down. Reach out, have faith and go forward.

Saweetie Has A Candid Discussion About How She Viewed Her Hair Growing Up

At the end of last year, Saweetie decided to do the big chop and debuted her new crown on Instagram in time for the new year. When asked about her decision to shave her head in previous interviews, the “Icy Chain” rapper shared that she wanted to “start fresh.” But now she’s giving folks a deeper look into her relationship with her hair. In the May 2022 Glamour UK issue, the 28-year-old reflected on her hair journey from struggling with it as a child to cutting it all off as an adult.

Keep reading...Show less
The daily empowerment fix you need.
Make things inbox official.
'P-Valley' & 10 Other Shows That Feature Empowered Black Characters

I vividly recall my mother implying that TV couldn’t teach me much of anything, but in reality, we know that representation teaches us a lot! It empowers us and highlights diverse ways of Black life (more so in recent television history) that vary from traditional to not so traditional – though this makes the impact no less real. Television shows like P-Valley highlight the importance of human decency over respectability politics, while other shows allow us to see the value in falling through life with our awkwardness.

Keep reading...Show less
Halle Bailey Makes Her Red Carpet Debut With Boyfriend DDG: Here’s What We Know About Him

Halle Bailey and her boyfriend DDG are one of the cutest celebrity couples in the game right now. After confirming their relationship in March 2022, Halle, 22, and DDG, 24, made their red carpet debut as a couple over the weekend during the 2022 BET Awards. In an interview with Extra, The Little Mermaid star shared that she was “nervous” about their debut. “We’re like tryna figure out what we were going to wear. All this stuff,” she said. The couple matched each other’s fly with both wearing all-black outfits.

Keep reading...Show less
Here's Why You Should Ditch Fourth Of July And Have A Family Reunion Instead

“Who made the potato salad?” As summertime kicks off, this is the universal question that, without fail, will be asked at every barbeque and backyard kickback over the coming months. With the Fourth of July also nearing, summertime celebrations and cookouts will be in full force. However, as the tide begins to turn in this new day and age, more Black Americans are celebrating Juneteenth, instead of the Fourth of July, because, after all, there were still over 250,000 Black Americans enslaved in Galveston, Texas during this so-called Independence Day.

Keep reading...Show less
Fitness Influencer Sara Hunt Shares Her Favorite Ways To Enjoy Summer in Chicago

This post is in partnership with Toyota.

Whether it's the lazy afternoons spent laying out on the beach, or nights spent sipping cocktails at your local rooftop hangout, there are so many reasons to love and look forward to summer. It's a time for respite, fun in the sun, and adventure. But as any Chicagoan can tell you, there's something particularly special about "Summertime Chi." The vibes in the Windy City are on 100 when the temperatures rise, and the city literally comes alive in the most magical way.

Keep reading...Show less
Exclusive Interviews
A Black woman looks into the camera and gives a closed-mouth smile. She's wearing a black turtleneck

Miss Diddy Kicks Off BET Awards Weekend With 'A Toast To Black Hollywood'

Her annual event to celebrate the culture has a new name and more intention than ever before

Latest Posts