Summer is looking a bit different this year thanks to 'Rona, and though things have been a bit rough, all is not lost. With all the stress from everyday life and world crises, adding a bit of reading to the mix is always a good look. The benefits of reading a great book are undeniable and include increasing intelligence, reducing stress, and relieving anxiety and depression. We could all use a bit of escape and brain food right now.
So let's get into 10 books worth checking out this summer and beyond---all raved about by bookstagrammers and lit lovers around the world. And don't worry sis. These aren't all the same ole' titles you've seen on other popular lists---there's a variety of genres and authors to wake up the book geek inside of all of us. (Yes, you sis. She's in there. Trust me.)
*This list is specially curated by the xoNecole team and some links are affiliate links. If you purchase an item from an affiliate link, xoNecole might earn a small commission.
'The Care And Feeding of Ravenously Hungry Girls' by Anissa Gray
Generational curses. Family drama. Redemption and understanding. If you're into stories about love, unity, transformation, and sisterly bonds, this book might be your pick of the summer. Described as "well-written" and "stunning," it has multiple narratives surrounding three sisters in the aftermath of one of them getting prison time for white-collar crimes. It's been a favorite on 2019 book lists including that of Vogue, Essence and Refinery29. Even Insecure star Issa Rae has "devoured" it.
'Little Book of Big Lies: A Journey to Inner Fitness' by Tina Lifford
This Queen Sugar actress has been dropping jewels of wisdom for a while via her IG, and Auntie Tina, as I like to call her, tells it like it is. Her latest book takes that to a whole 'nother level, with personal stories and insights on how to push through the hurts, dramas, and fears of life. "We must learn to see lies for what they are---distortions that are not the truth---and say no to their limiting lies," she writes. "From this point forward, there is never a justifiable reason to think poorly of ourselves or speak harshly to ourselves, not for any reason, at any time, under any circumstances." Who doesn't need that extra real, cool Auntie perspective in their lives?
'The City We Became' by N.K.Jemisin
Some reviewers have said that this book is an appropriate read for the COVID-19 times we live in, and Jemison's book offers a suspenseful other-world version of New York that has intrigued critics from NPR to The New York Times. This piece deviates from the usual science fiction into a more "rich and generous" alternative reality that resonates in today's environment of tragic deaths, quarantines, and social distancing.
'Transcendent Kingdom: A Novel' by Yaa Ayasi
Any book featuring a central character that is a scholar making sense of the everyday struggles of being a human being and recommitting to faith is worth a try, and this one is set to intrigue. Ghanaian-American writer Yaa Ayasi adds a bit of her own background in the book, writing about a Ghanaian immigrant family in Alabama grappling with issues of depression, grief, faith, religion and love. If you're not going to pre-order, you might want to go ahead and at least put this on your Amazon wish list. This author's debut book, Homecoming landed spots on both The New York Times Best Seller and Oprah's 10 Favorite Books lists.
'Affording Travel: Saving Strategies for Financially Savvy Travelers' by Danielle Desir
There are so many books out there with tips for investing, budgeting, and the like, but this book goes a bit off the beaten path and satisfies that sad wanderluster inside of of all of us. True, COVID-19 has put a boulder-sized dent in our travel plans, but it doesn't hurt to get a head-start this summer in planning that dream Africa tour or European adventure in time for summer 2021 or 2022. Along with advice, Desir shares her own stories of travel, how she was able to get over fears of not being able to afford trips and adventures of living abroad.
'A Tall History of Sugar' by Curdella Forbes
For all my Caribbean history and culture lovers, this is a story that takes one into the history of an industry that shaped Jamaica's economy and the link between the "mother country" and the island. It also infuses the sweet stickiness of a decades-long love story bound by folklore, colonialism, struggle and triumph. Epic, indeed.
'More Myself: A Journey' by Alicia Keys
We all know her signature voice and swag, from "You Don't Know My Name" to New York's classic anthem to her fab no-makeup movement, and this book is an extension of the Harlem-bred phenom's transitions through womanhood and self-actualization. The candid behind-the-scenes insights are intriguing enough, but the refreshing rawness of her storytelling in this book---about life, music, love, and self-confidence--- just shows why our love for Alicia Keys continues to grow. The words in this book are---like her songs---a breath of fresh air, and at the very least, you'll get inspired by a woman constantly on the glow up.
'We Want Our Bodies Back: Poems' by Jessica Care Moore
The title alone draws you in and the poetry is just as strikingly strong, assertive, and honest. Her work prompts the same deep sighs of understanding, empathy, and relatability as Ntozake Shange's classic For Colored Girls, and the subject matter features issues all women can relate to. If you don't see yourself and your own life in the words, you probably see your sister, mother, cousin or best friend.
'90 Days to C.E.O.: A Guide To Avoid Business Pitfalls And Unlock The Secrets Of Entrepreneurship' by Rochelle Graham-Campbell
It's no small feat to take $100 and build a haircare product line from your kitchen and expand into an international company with products on Target's shelves. Sharing the how-to tools and tips is an added bonus and truly a labor of love and service. Along with personal anecdotes about launching a business and tapping into the hustler and entrepreneur within, this book includes an action plan that would light a fire under the tail of anyone who dreams of becoming a self-made boss.
'Bloggers Can't Be Trusted' by Starrene Rhett
We can all relate to a time when we wanted a change---both in love and in career---and Nyela Barnes is both relatable and believable in her plight to find both. The blogger-focused, Internet nostalgia in this book is noteworthy, and if you've been fantasizing about that fine neighbor you never knew you had until you were forced to work from home for weeks on end, this book might spark the urge to shoot your shot. If not, you'll at least find a juicy escape into sticky drama and black love.
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Devale Ellis On Being A Provider, Marriage Growth & Redefining Fatherhood
In this candid episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Devale Ellis, actor, social media personality, and star of Zatima, about modern masculinity, learning to be a better husband, emotional presence in marriage, fatherhood for Black men, and leading by example.
“I Wasn’t Present Emotionally”: Devale Ellis on Marriage Growth
Devale Ellis On Learning He Was a ‘Bad Husband’
Ellis grew up believing that a man should prioritize providing for his family. “I know this may come off as misogynistic, but I feel like it’s my responsibility as a man to pay for everything,” he said, emphasizing the wise guidance passed down by his father. However, five years into his marriage to long-time partner Khadeen Ellis, he realized provision wasn’t just financial.
“I was a bad husband because I wasn’t present emotionally… I wasn’t concerned about what she needed outside of the resources.”
Once he shifted his mindset, his marriage improved. “In me trying to be of service to her, I learned that me being of service created a woman who is now willing to be of service to me.”
On Redefining Masculinity and Fatherhood
For Ellis, “being a man is about being consistent.” As a father of four, he sees parenthood as a chance to reshape the future.
“Children give you another chance at life. I have four different opportunities right now to do my life all over again.”
He also works to uplift young Black men, reinforcing their worth in a world that often undermines them. His values extend to his career—Ellis refuses to play roles that involve domestic violence or sexual assault.
Watch the full episode below:
On Marriage, Family Planning, and Writing His Story
After his wife’s postpartum preeclampsia, Ellis chose a vasectomy over her taking hormonal birth control, further proving his commitment to their partnership. He and Khadeen share their journey in We Over Me, and his next book, Raising Kings: How Fatherhood Saved Me From Myself, is on the way.
Through honesty and growth, Devale Ellis challenges traditional ideas of masculinity, making his story one that resonates deeply with millennial women.
For the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker peels back the layers of masculinity with candid conversations that challenge stereotypes and celebrate vulnerability. Real men. Real stories. Real talk.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
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6 Tabletop Sex Positions That'll Unlock You & Bae's Most Primal Desires
Something I will never tire of is finding new ways to bring new layers to intimacy. A wall you use as momentum, a bathroom sink to help you keep your balance as he worships you on his knees, a shower that is usually for cleansing but evolves into a sacred ritual of shared intimacy.
My favorite kind of sex is the kind of sex that prioritizes pleasure and connection. So, technically and thankfully, I can say most of my sex life has been quite pleasurable throughout the years. But the memorable encounters for sure take the cake. One such encounter actually took place on a kitchen counter, and with it unleashed inhibitions in ways I never anticipated while unlocking levels to top-tier sex. And that, that involved a kitchen counter.
Why Kitchen Counter Sex Just Hits Different
What is it about having your hips pressed into the edge of a kitchen counter that lets out something so primal in you? The cool-to-the-touch feel of the countertop against exposed skin as you rise to meet him again and again. The urgency in every movement. The playfulness of repurposing an everyday space for something far more erotic. If you’re looking to bring that energy into your own sex life, keep reading for positions and tips to explore.
1. The Bounce House
They don’t call it Bounce House for nothing. In this position, the penetrating partner lies flat on their back on a sturdy table or counter while the receiving partner straddles them, knees bent and facing away. With their hands gripping the edge of the surface for support, the receiving partner slides or bounces at their own pace, owning the rhythm, the motion, and the view.
According to sex therapist Michael Aaron, Ph.D., who spoke with Women’s Health, the receiving partner placing their legs between their partner’s creates a tighter sensation, while staying fully astride allows for more bounce and range of motion. Either way, this one puts the receiver in full control, and you know we love a good woman on top position. Pleasure and power? Say less.
2. The Bicycle
Well, you know what they say about riding a bike. In the case of this table top position, it's the receiving partner who is the rider...but not in the way you think. While lying back on a sturdy surface or a table, the receiver will bring their knees toward their chest, bending them as if in a cycling motion. The penetrating partner stands at the edge of the surface, grabbing the receiver's ankles, and guides themselves inside, slowly so as to savor the moment. This angle puts everything on display for the penetrating partner while allowing for deep, connected thrusting for the receiver.
To take things up a notch , the receiving partner can touch themselves or flex their thighs to control the depth or the rhythm. Because, who says only one person gets to have control?
3. Counter Offer
How could we be at the table and not use it to eat? Enter: Counter Offer. In this oral-focused sex position, the receiving partner perches on the edge of a counter or table, lying back or sitting upright with legs parted or bent for comfort. The penetrating partner kneels or stands between their thighs, depending on the setup and the kind of attention they’re ready to give. No doubt, this one’s all about access and intention.
With the vulva front and center, the height makes it easier to maintain eye contact, use hands freely for things like breast play or incorporating toys, and take their time with every moan-inducing taste. And that’s on five, six, seven, ATE.
4. Standing Doggy
Standing Doggy is what happens when a classic like doggy style gets an upgrade. Instead of being on all fours on a bed, the receiving partner bends over a hard surface like a table or counter, keeping their hips aligned at its edge. The penetrating partner stands behind and enters from the back, using the angle to go deeper and create a strong, steady rhythm. This one offers maximum control and visual appeal, especially if the penetrating partner reaches around for a little extra clitoral stimulation throughout thrusting.
This angle can get intense quickly, so bonus points if the receiving partner engages their pelvic floor muscles or shifts their weight to adjust how the pressure hits, especially if your goal is to hit that G-spot sweet spot.
5. Top Shelf
Men's Healthcalls this one "Yourself on the Shelf," but we like to call it "Top Shelf" because it's giving full view, full grip, and climax potential that's hard to top. The receiving partner sits on the edge of a sturdy table or counter while the penetrating partner stands in front of them and slowly slides in, thrusting while keeping them in position. From there, legs can wrap around their waist, arms can encircle their back, and the closeness at peak ecstasy? Chef's kiss.
If you have the core strength, add lifting to the menu for the final strokes leading to orgasm. Otherwise, allow the surface to the heavy lifting and enjoy the pleasure.
6. The Thumper
What better way to remind yourself that you're both the snack and the entrée than with a little tableside service courtesy of The Thumper? This position has the receiving partner kneeling on a sturdy table or counter (keyword: sturdy), hands gripping the edge or braced in front for support. The penetrating partner can then either kneel behind them (if there's room for two), or stay anchored on the ground with both feet planted on the floor (similar to the previously mentioned Standing Doggy). It all depends on the mood.
Kneeling on the table offers just the right amount of leverage for deep, steady strokes. The receiving partner can play with tightness by either keeping their knees closer together for a snug grip, or open their knees wider to invite more access, depth, and stretch. The Thumper is versatile that way, and the most important thing? The receiver gets to be the main course. Yum.
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