Black love deserves celebration. And it deserves celebration for multiple reasons. Because of our history, love for each other has been a necessity to survive. By choosing each other, we literally do it for the culture by continuing folklore and manifestations of our human intellectual achievements. Our genetic makeup has always been grounded in resilience — the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties and toughness. Black love creates balance, space, growth, and change making for a fundamental part of our identities.
That's why seeing Black love represented is so crucial. From the big screen to real-life examples, we have to empower Black women and men to cherish each other above all. Truth is, we all want that Dwayne Wayne-Whitley, Michelle-Barack, Beyonce-Jay-Z, Malcolm-Betty, Tamia-Grant, Synclaire-Overton love that withstands all things.
One of the most profound quotes we love is from John and Karen Clicksales, a couple of over 40 years. When talking about Black love, they said:
"Black love has a unique quality because of the world we live in, both past and present. Black love is the acknowledgment of making sacrifices. We as a couple have to adapt to one another, along with outside forces that affect one's everyday life. Black love to me can be affectionate, caring, passionate, strong, difficult, painful, cherished. Black love has sustained the test of time."
To keep the love going, we have gathered quotes about Black love that will keep hope alive and make you a true love believer.
"Black love is resistance." - Unknown
"Love is chosen by us. The love everyone has for their children is a love like no other love in the world. People want to have a better world for their children. The love starts by loving our fellow man as well as our country. This is the choice everyone has to make." - Michelle Obama
"I am grateful to have been loved, and to be loved now and to be able to love. Because love liberates." — Maya Angelou
"Being in love with someone will make you come out of your comfort zone." – Zora Neale Hurston
"You are the perfect verse over a tight beat." - Dre, Brown Sugar
"I pray that someone will love you enough to see you when you are not well, to see when you need true support, to see you when you need compassion, to see you when you need kindness. I pray that somebody loves you enough to sacrifice their life for you. I pray that type of love finds you so that you can understand why I don't want my husband to put his life on the line anymore, wearing a bulletproof vest if he don't have to, and if it's not his desire." - Tabitha Brown
"The true keys to loving someone are knowing how to care for someone, showing affection for the person, giving them respect, and being committed to making the relationship work. You also need honesty and openness if you want to succeed at love." - Bell Hooks
"It's not hard to express how you feel about love. People have been expressing their love for a long time. The realness of the love is based on honesty and how it makes you feel. Anyone can say they love someone in many different ways and make it sound unique." - Kenneth "Babyface" Edmonds
"Love takes off the masks we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within." - James Baldwin, The Fire Next Time
"Love means accepting many faults and taking 'revenge' out of your vocabulary. If you love someone, let go of the pain and move on with that person." – Beyonce
"Finding love within yourself is truly an act of God. Love is about accepting everything about yourself." - Ntozake Shange
"If you are out there and you want to attract somebody, fall in love with yourself."– Tina Lawson
"To truly love we must learn to mix various ingredients — care, affection, recognition, respect, commitment, and trust, as well as honest and open communication." — Bell Hooks
"There is one irrefutable law of the universe: We are each responsible for our own life. If you're holding anyone else accountable for your happiness, you're wasting your time. You must be fearless enough to give yourself the love you didn't receive." – Oprah Winfrey
"Love makes your soul crawl out from its hiding place." - Zora Neale Hurston
"Everyone you meet comes with baggage, find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack." - Unknown
"She doesn't belong to me. She belongs to God. I am simply the caretaker of her heart on God's behalf." - Unknown
"You deserve to be happy. Not in the arms of someone who keeps you waiting, but in the arms of someone who will take you now, love you forever, and leave you never." - Unknown
I hope you find someone who speaks your language so you don't have to spend a lifetime translating your spirit.— Dr. Thema (@Dr. Thema) 1522728296
"I hope you find someone who speaks your language so you don't have to spend a lifetime translating your spirit." - Dr. Thema
"Longevity and happiness are what it's all about. It's about figuring out how to be together happily. That's the only measurement that, I think, makes sense. Those are relationship goals: to still like the person you're with, to still want to be with the person you're with because you choose to be with them—not because it's the default, not because it's the easy thing. That doesn't mean you're happy all the time, but overall, you are happy, and you are still one team, and every day you're choosing that team. You're choosing to be together." - Tommy Oliver
Featured image by Getty Images
Joce Blake is a womanist who loves fashion, Beyonce and Hot Cheetos. The sophistiratchet enthusiast is based in Brooklyn, NY but has southern belle roots as she was born and raised in Memphis, TN. Keep up with her on Instagram @joce_blake and on Twitter @SaraJessicaBee.
Exclusive: Gabrielle Union On Radical Transparency, Being Diagnosed With Perimenopause And Embracing What’s Next
Whenever Gabrielle Union graces the movie screen, she immediately commands attention. From her unforgettable scenes in films like Bring It On and Two Can Play That Game to her most recent film, in which she stars and produces Netflix’s The Perfect Find, there’s no denying that she is that girl.
Off-screen, she uses that power for good by sharing her trials and tribulations with other women in hopes of helping those who may be going through the same things or preventing them from experiencing them altogether. Recently, the Flawless by Gabrielle Union founder partnered with Clearblue to speak at the launch of their Menopause Stage Indicator, where she also shared her experience with being perimenopausal.
In a xoNecoleexclusive, the iconic actress opens up about embracing this season of her life, new projects, and overall being a “bad motherfucker.” Gabrielle reveals that she was 37 years old when she was diagnosed with perimenopause and is still going through it at 51 years old. Mayo Clinic says perimenopause “refers to the time during which your body makes the natural transition to menopause, marking the end of the reproductive years.”
“I haven't crossed over the next phase just yet, but I think part of it is when you hear any form of menopause, you automatically think of your mother or grandmother. It feels like an old-person thing, but for me, I was 37 and like not understanding what that really meant for me. And I don't think we focus so much on the word menopause without understanding that perimenopause is just the time before menopause,” she tells us.
Photo by Brian Thomas
"But you can experience a lot of the same things during that period that people talk about, that they experienced during menopause. So you could get a hot flash, you could get the weight gain, the hair loss, depression, anxiety, like all of it, mental health challenges, all of that can come, you know, at any stage of the menopausal journey and like for me, I've been in perimenopause like 13, 14 years. When you know, most doctors are like, ‘Oh, but it's usually about ten years, and I'm like, ‘Uhh, I’m still going (laughs).’”
Conversations about perimenopause, fibroids, and all the things that are associated with women’s bodies have often been considered taboo and thus not discussed publicly. However, times are changing, and thanks to the Gabrielle’s and the Tia Mowry’s, more women are having an authentic discourse about women’s health. These open discussions lead to the creation of more safe spaces and support for one another.
“I want to be in community with folks. I don't ever want to feel like I'm on an island about anything. So, if I can help create community where we are lacking, I want to be a part of that,” she says. “So, it's like there's no harm in talking about it. You know what I mean? Like, I was a bad motherfucker before perimenopause. I’m a bad motherfucker now, and I'll be a bad motherfucker after menopause. Know what I’m saying? None of that has to change. How I’m a bad motherfucker, I welcome that part of the change. I'm just getting better and stronger and more intelligent, more wise, more patient, more compassionate, more empathetic. All of that is very, very welcomed, and none of it should be scary.”
The Being Mary Jane star hasn’t been shy about her stance on therapy. If you don’t know, here’s a hint: she’s all for it, and she encourages others to try it as well. She likens therapy to dating by suggesting that you keep looking for the right therapist to match your needs. Two other essential keys to her growth are radical transparency and radical acceptance (though she admits she is still working on the latter).
"I was a bad motherfucker before perimenopause. I’m a bad motherfucker now, and I'll be a bad motherfucker after menopause. Know what I’m saying? None of that has to change. How I’m a bad motherfucker, I welcome that part of the change."
Gabrielle Union and Kaavia Union-Wade
Photo by Monica Schipper/Getty Images
“I hope that a.) you recognize that you're not alone. Seek out help and know that it's okay to be honest about what the hell is happening in your life. That's the only way that you know you can get help, and that's also the only other way that people know that you are in need if there's something going on,” she says, “because we have all these big, very wild, high expectations of people, but if they don't know what they're actually dealing with, they're always going to be failing, and you will always be disappointed. So how about just tell the truth, be transparent, and let people know where you are. So they can be of service, they can be compassionate.”
Gabrielle’s transparency is what makes her so relatable, and has so many people root for her. Whether through her TV and film projects, her memoirs, or her social media, the actress has a knack for making you feel like she’s your homegirl. Scrolling through her Instagram, you see the special moments with her family, exciting new business ventures, and jaw-dropping fashion moments. Throughout her life and career, we’ve seen her evolve in a multitude of ways. From producing films to starting a haircare line to marriage and motherhood, her journey is a story of courage and triumph. And right now, in this season, she’s asking, “What’s next?”
“This is a season of discovery and change. In a billion ways,” says the NAACP Image Award winner. “The notion of like, ‘Oh, so and so changed. They got brand new.’ I want you to be brand new. I want me to be brand new. I want us to be always constantly growing, evolving. Having more clarity, moving with different purpose, like, and all of that is for me very, very welcomed."
"I want you to be brand new. I want me to be brand new. I want us to be always constantly growing, evolving. Having more clarity, moving with different purpose, like, and all of that is for me very, very welcomed."
She continues, “So I'm just trying to figure out what's next. You know what I mean? I'm jumping into what's next. I'm excited going into what's next and new. I'm just sort of embracing all of what life has to offer.”
Look out for Gabrielle in the upcoming indie film Riff Raff, which is a crime comedy starring her and Jennifer Coolidge, and she will also produce The Idea of You, which stars Anne Hathaway.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image by Mike Lawrie/Getty Images
Jay-Z has mastered an air of mystique. With a rap career that spans three decades, the Brooklyn native has managed to weave in and out of the public spotlight, making his rare interview appearances eagerly anticipated.
When you’ve managed to reach billionaire status at the rightful age of 50 and are married to the greatest female artist of our generation, you can grow accustomed to letting your resume speak for itself. But in late October, the music mogul shed his discretion and joined CBS This Morning co-host Gayle King for an in-depth interview while touring his "The Book of HOV" exhibit at the Brooklyn Public Library.
JAY-Z weighs in on "$500,000 in cash or lunch with JAY-Z" debate: "You've gotta take the money"
In the exclusive interview, the 4:44 rapper discussed his extensive body of work, detailed his active involvement in criminal justice reform, and gave rare, personal insights on the cultural impact of his wife, Beyoncé Knowles-Carter, and their daughter Blue Ivy, joining her mom on the Renaissance World Tour this year.
During his sitdown with King, the Roc Nation owner settled the viral internet debate of “Would you rather have one meal with Jay-Z and pick his brain, or get $500,000 cash?” To which he simply advised fans to take the cash.
“You gotta take the money,” he said. “What am I gonna say?”
Internet debate aside, you might be surprised to learn that this coveted conversation with the goated hitmaker almost didn’t happen.
The morning show host caught up with Scott Evans from Access Hollywood recently and shared that her interview with Jay-Z may not have happened had she heeded the advice of her friend, Oprah Winfrey.
"You know he doesn't like to do interviews, and I was shameless," King told Evans. "I just groveled [so much] that it became embarrassing."
“Even Oprah said, ‘You are making a damn fool of yourself. Stop asking him. He doesn’t want to do it.’ But I couldn’t let it go, because he never said no, no, no – he just kept delaying, delaying, delaying."
Despite Oprah's initial suggestion that he was being “polite” by not saying no, King persisted in her request to interview Hov and expressed gratitude for his eventual participation."
Oprah said he’s just being polite because he doesn’t want to tell you no, but I kept coming back,” King continued. “I don’t know why he said yes or why he changed his mind… I’m just grateful that he did."
It’s safe to say that fans and admirers of Jay Z are grateful for King’s persistence. Without it, we’d have one less opportunity to gain insight into the rapper’s life as a proud husband and father and preserve his legacy.
To commemorate Gayle King’s noteworthy entry into Hov’s interview hall of fame, we’ve put together a list of his most iconic interview moments.
Jay Z's Classic 2013 Interview on The Breakfast Club:
The Breakfast Club had a nearly hour-long conversation with the mogul about music, family, and much more.
Jay-Z in Conversation with Dean Baquet of The New York Times
The rapper and music mogul discusses therapy, marriage, and politics with The New York Times's executive editor.
Jay-Z on 'My Next Guest Needs No Introduction' with David Letterman
Jay-Z appeared on David Letterman's Netflix series My Next Guest Needs No Introduction and gave his views on the Trump administration.
Jay-Z Joins Kevin Hart on Peacock’s 'Hart to Hart'
Hip-hop legend Jay-Z sits down with Kevin Hart to discuss how self-confidence and Muhammad Ali's influence on his life.
Jay-Z’s One-on-One Interview with CNN
CNNMoney's full interview with the hip-hop mogul about everything from his new book to Obama to how he makes money.
Featured image via CBS