
There's an old quote by author and sales strategist Tom Hopkins that says, "You are your greatest asset. Put your time, effort, and money into training, grooming, and encouraging your greatest asset." Simply put, invest in yourself. So many of us are busy constantly investing and pouring into our spouses, our kids, and our jobs that we forget all about ourselves. You probably read that and thought to yourself that you are obligated to invest in the kids, the job, and the spouse. You're right. But that should be at the expense of yourself and certainly not before you invest in yourself. Investing in yourself will help you best serve others.
32 Powerful Ways to Invest In Yourself
Sure, it may take some practice and change of mindset, but the good news is that you can start small and start right now. Here are more than 30 ways you can begin investing in yourself today:
1.Exercise Regularly

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Exercising regularly is a sure way to create not only a healthy body but also a healthy mind. Beginning an exercise routine can seem daunting at first but try not to get intimidated. There are so many different ways to exercise. You can walk, jog, lift weights, do yoga, Pilates, or even jump rope. Start slow and gradually build up. Be creative and have fun!
2.Therapy

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While exercising can certainly help you concentrate and feel mentally sharp, there will inevitably be times in all of our lives that we need to talk to a professional. Therapy is one of those things that I think everyone should try at least once in their lives. The benefits are numerous.
3.Create a Side Hustle

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The great Warren Buffet (whose net worth is more than $86 billion) once said that you should never depend on a single income. In other words, multiple streams of income are the move! I know people who have a second (and sometimes third) stream of income doing everything from tutoring, to writing, to event planning, to interior decorating. If you're not sure where to start, take some time to think about what you're passionate about and start there.
4.Find a Mentor

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So, you've identified your passion. Now what? If you're at a loss as to what the next step should be, it might be beneficial to find a mentor who is an expert in that area. You'd be surprised who would be willing to share their knowledge and experiences. For some, you might have to pay for their services because mentoring could very well be their side hustle.
5.Learn a New Language

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As the world becomes more and more diverse, learning a new language has never been more necessary. The great news is that you can learn a new language right from the comfort of your home and what better time than now to start since we're all spending more time than usual in the house? Resources like Rosetta Stone and Babbel offer online language courses for as low as $6 a month.
6.Travel

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When most people hear the word travel, they immediately think it requires traveling out of the country. However, with COVID-19 still running rampant and so many people out of work as a result, that may not be feasible for everyone right now. Lucky for you, travel does not have to be expensive. You can start small by taking a road trip or even exploring your own city. Travel is more about new experiences than the destination. If you want to travel out of the country, start a travel fund so you can save up and show off that second language you learned!
7.Pay Off Debt

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This is one of the most freeing experiences ever. Being in a ton of debt can cause stress, depression, and anxiety. A popular way to pay off debt is with the debt snowball method which means you pay off your debts in order from smallest to largest. You pay more than the minimum amount due on the smallest debt and pay the minimum amount due on all other debt. Once you have paid off the smallest debt, you move on to the next smallest. Author Dave Ramsey explains more about how the debt snowball works here. Minimizing debt and being debt-free reduces stress, improves your credit score, and gives you financial security.
8.Create a Budget

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The word budget probably makes you want to roll your eyes, or it may even trigger a bit of anxiety. It shouldn't. Think of a budget as simply a plan for what you're going to do with your money. That's it. Creating a budget can help you save money, meet your financial goals, and stop wasting money. Once you stop spending $150 a month on coffee, you'll thank yourself.
9.Start a Savings Account

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Already have one? Perfect! Now start putting money in that thing! Seriously, pick an amount and commit to adding that to your savings each time you get paid. You can start small if you have to and gradually increase. Trust me, it will add up.
10.Buy a Plant

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Plants are not only aesthetically pleasing and sure to make any space look better but they are good for you too. Plants can remove air pollutants as well as help give your immune system a little boost. With flu season right around the corner and COVID-19 still looming, we could all use an immune system boost. If you're worried about not having a green thumb, check out our article to learn more about houseplants that are easy to care for and don't require a green thumb here.
11.Practice Meditation

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With everything going on in the world today, it's easy for any one of us to become stressed. This is where meditation comes in. It just requires a little practice and can be done virtually anywhere. According to Headspace, meditation is not about turning off your thoughts or feelings but learning to observe them. Consistency, not perfection, is key when learning to meditate. The more you practice, the better you will become at it.
12.Schedule a Doctor's Appointment

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At least once a year, you should be going to your doctor and getting a check-up. This will help your doctor determine the general status of your health. A yearly physical is also a good time to ask questions or discuss any changes that you may have noticed in your body.
13.Perform a Breast Self-Exam

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It's quick and painless, so no excuses ladies! Early detection is key. It's so important that you do a self-exam on your breast regularly so that you will get to know what is normal for you. That way you are immediately alerted when something is abnormal.
14.Practice Gratitude

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The benefits of practicing gratitude are endless. I'll keep it short and sweet though, it just feels good. Let me give you an example. A few weeks ago, I had to get some car repairs. When the service technician called me with the total, he told me it was $3,800 to fix my car. I immediately got upset. Of course, that was not a good feeling. But then I took a moment and thought about how a few years ago I would not have had the money to fix my car. Then I thought about how I currently had the money sitting in my savings account to get my car fixed, and I immediately switched to a spirit of gratitude. I instantly felt better and grateful.
15.Learn a New Recipe

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Adding just one new recipe to your arsenal every few months will improve your cooking skills, offer you more variety, and even save you money. Cooking also allows you to create healthy meals at home and you can feel satisfied that you know exactly what you are putting into your body. So whether you invest in a cookbook or scour the web, make an effort to learn a new recipe at least every couple of months.
16.Get More Sleep

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Not getting enough sleep not only makes you cranky the next morning but it can also be detrimental to your concentration and even your health. Likewise, getting more sleep makes you feel sharper and boosts your immune system. Try going to bed just an hour earlier and feel the difference.
17.Stop Procrastinating

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Procrastination is something that we're all guilty of doing a time or two (or five) in our lives. It can seem easier to put off the things we need to do until later, but it's actually easier to just dig in and get them done. You'll feel less stressed and more accomplished after you do. Lifehack shares 11 steps you can take to stop procrastinating:
- Break your work into little steps.
- Change your environment.
- Create a detailed timeline with specific deadlines.
- Eliminate your procrastination pit stops.
- Hang out with people who inspire you to take action.
- Get a buddy.
- Tell others about your goals.
- Seek out someone who has already achieved the outcome.
- Re-clarify your goals.
- Stop overcomplicating things.
- Get a grip and just do it.
18.Get a Massage

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Massages used to be considered a luxury, but over the years they have become a treatment modality for stress and pain reduction. You can get a massage anywhere from the airport to the spa at many different price points. Don't wait until a special occasion. Get one now!
19.Create a Skincare Routine

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Like most things in life, it is easier to prevent damage to your skin than to try to fix the damage that has already occurred. This is why it is so important to create a skincare routine and stick with it. Simple things like washing your face at night, wearing sunscreen, and keeping your face moisturized are key to great skin. If you need help developing a skincare routine talk to a dermatologist or esthetician.
20.Get Life Insurance

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I know that we don't like to think about our mortality but it is so important. Even a small policy can help protect your family and bring your loved ones peace of mind. If the thought of it all has you confused, Fidelity has a great summary here that will help clarify things for you.
21.Create a Morning Routine

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A strong morning routine sets the tone for your day and can help you have a more productive day. A strong routine is going to look different for each of us. It's about what works for you and that's the beauty of it. It's your routine. The routine that helps you be your best self. If you know that scrolling through social media as soon as you open your eyes in the morning makes you feel bad, then cut it out. Instead, try replacing social media scrolling with something that makes you feel good like journaling, setting intentions, or working out.
22.Take a Class

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There are classes available for anything you can think of whether it's boxing, makeup, painting, or writing. You name it, there is probably a class for it. Taking a class is a fun way to discover new passions and enrich existing ones.
23.Declutter

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I don't know about you, but having a lot of clutter in my house causes me to feel overwhelmed, which is why every few months I make sure to declutter. I don't have a set schedule. I just do it as I feel the need arises. I go through my closets, my drawers, or my kitchen and either get rid of things or organize them. Afterward, I feel like I've decluttered my mind a bit and can breathe better.
24.Invest Your Money

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Investing your money is very much an investment in yourself. Financial expert, Chanel Scott's advice to younger generations is to start investing early. If you don't consider yourself to be a part of the younger generation, don't worry. It's never too late to start investing. Do your research, find the way that works best for you, and get started.
25.Write In a Journal

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People journal for different reasons, but I think that everyone who does it would agree that it does wonders for their mental health. Journaling is a healthy way to get all the thoughts out of your head and onto paper, subsequently helping with self-expression, anxiety, and even promoting self-reflection.
26.Network

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I guarantee that some of the world's most successful people got that way in part by networking. Networking is a powerful tool with endless benefits. It opens the doors for new opportunities and can put your name in rooms you haven't even stepped foot in yet. Thanks to COVID-19, you may not be able to do a lot of in-person networking but thankfully virtual events and social media sites like LinkedIn provide opportunities for you to connect with like-minded people.
27.Forgive

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Let me preface this one by saying that forgiveness does not mean that you forget nor does it mean that you keep toxic people around you. Forgiveness simply means that you release the energy of anger and resentment and instead usher in the energy of forgiveness, acceptance, and letting go. Forgiveness is for you, not other people, so whether they are deserving of forgiveness doesn't matter. Do it for yourself.
28.Drink More Water

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How much water you should drink a day is debatable and largely depends on who you ask, but one thing that is not up for debate is that water is undoubtedly good for you. Water promotes skin health, regulates body temperature, and flushes waste from the body just to name a few of the benefits. Start small by drinking at least a glass a day and gradually increase your intake. Trust me, your body will thank you.
29.Read a Book

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Reading a book can be a beautiful escape or a way to expand your knowledge. It doesn't matter if it is fiction, non-fiction, or self-help, reading builds vocabulary, helps to prevent cognitive decline, and improves focus and concentration. Buying or checking out books, not your thing? No worries, download an audiobook and sit back, relax, and escape.
30.Set a Goal

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And then crush it! It can be big or small—it doesn't matter. What's important is that you work toward meeting that goal. Setting and meeting goals give you such a feeling of accomplishment. Once you meet a goal, set another one. It will quickly become a lifestyle.
31.Take a "Me" Day

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With all of the things that you have to do on a daily basis, it can seem like there aren't enough hours in a day making a "me day" seem pretty impossible to achieve but that is exactly why it is so important to take one. If you absolutely, positively can't take a whole day, try to at least take a few hours. Go to the places that you love and do the things that you love to do—or do nothing at all.
32.Love Yourself

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Most people will verbally tell you that, of course, they love themselves, but do our actions reflect that self-proclaimed self-love? Do we pour into ourselves? Do we honor ourselves? Do we show up as our best selves? Truly loving yourself is one of the best ways to invest in yourself. The best part is that it is priceless.
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This Is How To Keep 'Holiday Season Stress' From Infecting Your Relationship
Hmph. Maybe it’s just me, but it seems like there is something really weird happening in the fall season air (because winter doesn’t officially begin until December 21) that cuddle season is in full swing while break-up season is as well. In fact, did you know that break-ups are so popular during the holiday season that December 11 is deemed Break-Up Day?
The reasons why relationships shift around this time vary; however, I did both roll my eyes and chuckle when I read that a very popular one is because it’s an easy way to get out of getting one’s significant other a Christmas present. SMDH.
Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
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Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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Can You Use Neem Oil As Birth Control? What (Else) Can You Use It For?
When you’re a doula (which I am), when it comes to the topics of conception, pregnancy, and birth, you’re going to hear just about everything.
For instance, when a couple told me that they were shocked to be pregnant for the fourth time and yet, they use the pull-out method because they are Catholic and don’t believe in birth control, they were stumped when I said, “You mean that you don’t use hormonal birth control because pulling out is controlling sperm, right?” (I mean…right? — LOL). From there, I mentioned an all-natural alternative that, well, it’s kind of interesting that more people don’t know about it.
Now, before we get into what that is, let me just say that NOTHING is 100 percent foolproof (when it comes to avoiding pregnancy) besides abstinence. Let me also say that other birth control options (like the condom, the pill, and IUDs…oh, and a vasectomy) have more odds at consistent success than what we are about to explore today.
Still, if you are looking for something that is hormone-free, there is a natural oil that has been known to pleasantly surprise some folks when it comes to avoiding conception for many, many years at this point: Neem oil.
Is It True That Neem Oil Is an All-Natural Form of Birth Control?
Okay, so you saw what this sistah in the Instagram post just did, right? If it low-key sounds crazy to you…it shouldn’t. The reality is there is science to back up that, at the very least, neem oil can be treated as an all-natural type of spermicide. The way it works is, if you apply it to your vaginal opening and to your partner’s penis right before intercourse, neem oil has the ability to kill sperm.
In fact, one study revealed that when 238 women used neem oil in this way, approximately five minutes before intercourse, only nine became pregnant during a 1-3 year period. Hmph. When you stop to think that 1 in 5 women typically get pregnant from the pull-out method, those odds are actually semi-impressive.
So, should you just run out to your local health store and cop a bottle of the oil? Well, you definitely should run your decision by your doctor first so that you can get even more intel about the pros, cons and risks. It’s also a good idea to keep in mind that this method is not FDA-approved and it can sometimes be so potent that you could end up irritating your vagina.
Still, even with all that I just said, it can’t hurt to do your own additional research when it comes to using neem oil as a contraceptive alternative; especially if hormonal birth control is something that really doesn’t sit well with you (for whatever the reason).
Oh, and while we’re on the topic of neem oil, even if you don’t need it for birth control reasons, there are still several solid reasons for why you should have a couple of bottles in your possession. I’ve included seven of ‘em.
1. Neem Oil Is a Solid Antioxidant
Something that is pretty darn impressive about neem (extract) oil is it contains a whopping 140 different active compounds including ones that are potent antioxidants. Since it also has anti-inflammatory properties in it too, if you happen to have an ulcer or you simply want to reduce some oxidative stress (so that your liver and kidneys can remain in an optimal state), neem oil is an all-natural way to benefit your health and well-being when it comes to both of these issues…and much more.
2. Neem Oil Can Help to Heal Skin Issues
Whenever you get a pimple, there is some inflammation that transpires. In fact, hyperpigmentation that comes after a breakout is typically because your body overproduced melanin in order to get the inflammation down. That said, because neem oil is so powerful when it comes to its anti-inflammation elements and since it also contains antimicrobial properties and fatty acids as well, you can apply it to a zit to speed up the healing process or mix it with a carrier oil to achieve/maintain healthy skin altogether (especially if you happen to have eczema or psoriasis or you want your skin to look younger for a longer period of time).
3. Neem Oil Reduces Dandruff
Dandruff transpires as the direct result of your scalp producing too much fungus/yeast known as Malassezia. That said, guess what else neem oil is considered to be? It’s an antifungal oil too! Not only that but it contains an active ingredient known as nimbidin that can help to hinder the build-up of Malassezia, reduce scalp irritation and suppress the inflammation that is sometimes associated with dandruff. Very cool.
4. Neem Oil Can Keep Your Hair Healthy
Aside from what I just said about dandruff, there are properties in neem oil that can help to keep your hair healthy, period. For instance, if you blend it with a carrier oil like jojoba, it can significantly reduce any frizz that you may have; that way, your natural curls can end up having more curl definition. Also, since it helps to strengthen your hair follicles, neem oil may be able to assist in you experiencing less hair breakage — which means that you will be able to retain more hair length over time.
5. Neem Oil Helps to Maintain Oral Health
This month, I have to have minor oral surgery — and a sistah is not at all thrilled about it. Although I adore my (new) dentist, who wants to get cut and drilled on (which is exactly why I am opting to be sedated)? On top of that, even though I have dental insurance, this ish is not about to be cheap. SMDH.
Moral to the story here — always be as proactive as possible about your oral health and, thanks to the antibacterial and anti-inflammatory properties that are in neem oil, it can help you out with your teeth and gums too.
Whether you are trying to naturally treat or prevent tooth decay, you want to try to avoid gum disease, you want your teeth to appear whiter, you desire stronger enamel or you’re looking for temporary relief from a toothache — it’s neem oil to the rescue on all fronts.
6. Neem Oil Improves Digestive Health
It’s super important to always remember that 80 percent of your immunity is housed in your gut. That said, in the realm of Ayurvedic medicine (check out “10 Ayurveda-Inspired Wellness Practices For A Balanced Fall & Winter”), neem oil has been long hailed as a way to bring relief to minor digestive issues. It does this by using its properties to soothe an upset stomach while reducing unpleasant symptoms such as gas and bloating.
7. Neem Oil May Lower Blood Sugar Levels
As if we haven’t already learn enough about how neem oil can be a real blessing, if you’re someone who wants to keep your blood sugar levels where they need to be, this oil may be able to help in this department too. The long story short with this one is some studies have revealed that neem oil has the ability to revive some of the cells that help to produce insulin. As a direct result, that can help to lower blood sugar levels. Now how dope is that?
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Hmph. Talk about an oil that is an unsung hero.
What are you waiting for? Cop some and see how (well) it works for you!
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