Explore your sign’s 2024 horoscope predictions to learn what is in store for you this year in love, career, and more. Check out the love compatibility of each sign to learn more about zodiac pairings and all things compatibility.
July is a month of connection, hope, planning, and rejuvenation. The energy begins to settle more this month after a somewhat dramatic June. This is when new relationship developments will be taking place, and when the power of love, understanding, and connectivity prevails. We enter July in Cancer Season, and when the Sun is in Cancer emotions are high, but so is the love. There is more nurturing and caring energy flowing through the world this month and you will feel it strongly as you move through it.
The month begins with Neptune going retrograde in Pisces from July 2 until December 7. Neptune retrograde makes things a little foggy for now, and inner clarity may feel more challenging to grab ahold of. Overall, Neptune moving into retrograde motion tells us our dreams have the power to become a reality, but make sure you balance your realistic goals with the hope you have for it all. Mercury moves into Leo on the same day, and Mercury in this fire sign brings the heat into communication matters. Mercury in Leo wants to perform. Conversations are more drastic and intense for the time being, and this transit will allow you to feel more confident in what you have to say while giving space for others to do so as well.
The Month Ahead: Your July 2024 Horoscopes
On July 5, the New Moon of the month occurs. This New Moon will be in Cancer, joining the Sun. This is a good New Moon to set your intentions for your emotional world and to not only visualize what you want in your life right now but to take the time to truly feel into it. Take a relaxing bath, go to the beach, light a candle of intention, and do what feels soothing and nurturing to your life during this time.
On July 11, Venus moves into Leo, and Venus in Leo is a proud lover. Venus, the planet of love, being in this bold fire sign brings passion to romantic and relationship matters. Don’t be afraid to put yourself first right now and to go after the love you want, while knowing you deserve the best for yourself. This is a time of recognizing your desires in love.
Mars leaves Taurus and enters Gemini on July 20, and this is bringing a little chaos to the emotional waters of Cancer Season. Mars in Gemini is proactive but can also be reactive, and we are being asked to think things through before acting on them. The day after, there is a Full Moon in Capricorn, and this is the Strawberry Moon of the year. This Full Moon is all about letting go of self-sabotage and recognizing the growth, skills, and achievements you have created in your life thus far.
This Full Moon is about checking in, doing the work, and letting go of old belief systems that don’t serve you. Don’t underestimate yourself right now.
Leo Season officially begins on July 22 this year, and this Leo Season will be interesting as Mercury will be going retrograde later in August. On July 25, Mercury moves out of Leo and enters Virgo, and Mercury feels more powerful here. Mercury will be in Virgo until August 14, and communication is more clear, direct, and thoughtful. Mercury in Virgo asks all the right questions, and your power is in the details right now.
Before July comes to an end, Chiron goes retrograde in Aries from July 26 until December 29, and healing takes priority right now. While Chiron is retrograde, this is a good time to be proactive with your healing and the things that matter to you and to focus on renewing your inner power and living a confident life. Overall, July is about doing what is best for you, your heart, and your peace of mind.
What July 2024 Has In Store For Your Zodiac Sign
Read for your sun sign and rising sign below to see what the month has in store for you.
ARIES
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleYour guidance for the month is to take your time with what you are developing and to consider all options, Aries. The Sun is in your 4th house of home and family for most of the month, and you need more time to decompress right now. You are moving through July with a sense of purpose but also with more of a need to emotionally regulate and understand your inner world better. Venus will be entering a more romantic area of your birth chart on July 11, and this is going to be spicing things up for you in life and love.
On July 21, there is a Full Moon occurring in your 10th house of career, reputation, and achievement, and this is a good time to take a look at how far you have come. Work matters are culminating and some important projects are seeing completion now. Before the month ends, Chiron goes retrograde in your sign until the end of the year, and you are going to be learning more about what it means to love yourself, heal, and ask the tough questions.
TAURUS
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is all about getting the right head space and heart space, Taurus. A lot is developing for you right now, but it may be hard to notice your progress because things are moving as quickly as you have hoped. With a New Moon happening on July 5, in the area of the birth chart having to do with communication, you are receiving some important divine guidance as the month begins.
Set your intentions for mental clarity and allow yourself to be heard right now as you never know what may spark the right conversations that need to be had.
Venus, your ruling planet, enters Leo and moves into your 4th house on July 11. This transit for you will be all about bringing love and compassion into the home and feeling a stronger support system in your life. Find your people and connect more with the people you resonate with and feel safe with. Before the month ends there is a Full Moon happening in an adventurous area of your birth chart, and the things you took a leap of faith on over the past month, are coming full circle for you now.
GEMINI
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is about creating boundaries and putting your well-being first, Gemini. Gemini Season is over, but there is still a lot on your plate as your responsibilities accumulate. With the Sun in your 2nd house of income for most of the month, you are focused on your financial world right now and are creating new plans for your growth here. The New Moon on July 5, will be helping you set the right intentions for your abundance and will be showing you what has been blocking your flow here.
Venus enters your 3rd house of communication on July 11, and this is bringing in more connection and understanding in your life. Mid-July you are feeling more of the coming together with others that you have been looking for this month. On July 20, Mars enters your sign where it will be until September 4, and you have more energy, charisma, and direction with you now. This summer is going to be very active for you, and you are going to be having a lot of fun.
CANCER
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is all about opportunity, Cancer. It’s officially Cancer Season, and it’s your time to be bold, be confident, and go after your heart’s desires. The month begins with a New Moon in your sign on July 5, and this is a good time to set intentions for your personal goals, self-love, and self-care. This New Moon is all about getting back to you and giving yourself the love and nurturing you so often give to others.
On July 21, there is a Full Moon in your opposite sign, Capricorn, and this Full Moon is bringing things full circle when it comes to love and finances.
You have been working on your personal development this month and have been putting yourself first more, and towards the end of July, you are seeing the benefits this has brought to your close relationships and your financial reality. Cancer Season ends on July 22, the Sun moves into your house of income, and you are putting your financial goals more to the forefront. While the Sun is in Leo, your abundance increases and you are going to be seeing growth here over the next month.
LEO
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is a healing month for you, Leo. You are learning more about your heart this month, and are healing through understanding and acknowledging your past. The month begins with Mercury moving into your sign on July 2, and more clarity and understanding are coming in for you now. Mercury in Leo makes matters of the mind more prominent for you, and you are coming up with some good ideas and perspectives right now that are helping you through what is thrown your way this month.
On July 11, Venus enters Leo and love takes a turn for the better. There may have been some challenges of feeling the love in support in your life recently, and you are moving away from this energy now as you recognize the need to give yourself the love you have been seeking. Leo Season officially begins on July 22, and it’s time to shine in your truth. This Leo Season will have some ups and downs as Mercury will be going retrograde in your sign for two weeks so overall, this is your month to renew, and gain clarity.
VIRGO
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is all about having fun, Virgo. You are in high spirits this month, and there is a lot to celebrate in your life. You are feeling more friendship, connection, and overall joy this month, and this energy is more prevalent for you with the Sun in your 11th house of hopes, dreams, and manifestations for most of July. Mercury will be in your house of closure and endings as we enter the month, however, and you are experiencing a big letting go in your life as well.
The Full Moon of July is happening in a fellow earth sign, Capricorn, and romance is high for you during this time.
This Full Moon is giving you clarity on matters of the heart, and love feels more stable and secure right now. On July 25, Mercury enters your sign where it will be until August 14, and Mercury is your ruling planet and loves being in your sign. You are going to be learning a lot through communication matters over the next few weeks and will be taking more time to consider how you want to communicate and come across.
LIBRA
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is about creating abundance in your life, Libra. This is an active month for you as you take on new opportunities and thrive in what you are working towards. With the Sun in your 10th house of career for most of July, you are focused on making your goals a reality and taking on more responsibilities here. Venus moves into your 11th house of hopes, dreams, and friendship on July 11th, and this is going to help you navigate the new direction this part of your life is headed in this month.
The Full Moon of the month is a fortunate time for you and will be occurring on July 21st. This Full Moon is bringing things full circle for you in the home, and creating an emotional clarity that makes you feel safer with where you are in life and who is by your side. Before July ends, Chiron goes Retrograde in your sister sign Aries, and your love life is going to be moving through a transformation for the rest of the year. Chiron Retrograde is going to be helping you overcome any issues with codependency.
SCORPIO
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is all about patience and communicating effectively Scorpio. The Sun is in an adventurous and transformative area of your birth chart for most of the month, and this is a good time to travel or to think about the things you want to do in life. There is a New Moon in this same area of your chart on July 5, and it’s all about setting your intentions for adventure, inspiration, and spirituality as you start the month.
On July 11, Venus enters your 10th house of career, and you are going to be receiving more recognition, love, and support on the job.
How you are coming across to others is being received more favorably during this time, and it’s your time to show up and show out. There is a Full Moon occurring at the end of the month on July 21, and this Full Moon will be giving you some significant divine guidance. Important messages are coming in as you end the month, and you are making your voice heard.
SAGITTARIUS
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleYou are moving through a personal awakening this month, Sagittarius. The month begins with a New Moon in your 8th house of transformation on July 5, and this New Moon is all about setting intentions for your path in life and your important commitments. Look at where you are and where you want to be, and if you are receiving the same type of energy you want to be given. You are finding your balance as you enter the month overall, and you are going to be moving through a lot of changes this month as you find your way and gain some clarity.
Venus moves into a fellow Fire Sign, Leo from July 11 until August 4, and love is a source of happiness and adventure for you during this time. You are going to be feeling the love when you step out of your comfort zone more, approach things with confidence, and keep an open mind. On July 26, Chiron goes Retrograde in Aries, and this is going to change the pace for you romantically. While Chiron is retrograde in your 5th house, you are going to be defining and redefining your happiness in life.
CAPRICORN
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is all about moving on and moving forward Capricorn. You are moving through a time of clarity, love, and also personal healing, as you recognize what is no longer serving you or your heart anymore. The New Moon happening on July 5, will be a good time for you to set your intentions for the heart, and for the relationships that feel right for you and that you want to continue to develop over the next month.
The Full Moon of the month will be happening in your sign on July 21, and all eyes are on you right now. This Full Moon is bringing all things to do with your personal goals, health, and self-image, to the forefront. Let go of perceiving yourself with anything less than love, confidence, and support during this time. Before the month ends, Chiron goes retrograde in your 4th house of home, foundations, and inner world, and you are going to be moving through a time of deep healing and emotional renewal for the rest of the year.
AQUARIUS
AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is a big month of growth for you, Aquarius. You are feeling courageous and energized when it comes to your goals, daily life, and the progress you are making right now. The Sun is in your 6th house of work and health for most of the month, and you are really working hard in July and taking care of some important responsibilities and duties. Venus moves into your opposite sign on July 11th, and you are receiving more support mid-month, and are feeling the love in your life.
There is a Full Moon happening on July 21, and this Full Moon is a time of closure and endings for you. You are letting go of what once was, and creating space for the new to enter your life. You have been through a journey of self-growth this month and you are bringing this energy into your inner world and inner harmony as well. On July 22, the Sun moves into Leo and enters a romantic and loving area of your birth chart. You are ending the month in high spirits and with love on your side.
PISCES
PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is an eye-opening month for you, Pisces. You are moving through a lot of transformations this month and are focused on creating more clarity in your life. Neptune goes retrograde in your sign from July 2 until the end of the year, and you are entering a time of taking the rose-colored glasses off and seeing the truth of what’s been hidden. On July 5, there is a New Moon in your 5th house of romance, and it’s time to set your intentions for love, but also for what will make you personally happy in life and make you feel like you are living in your authentic truth.
On July 21, the Full Moon in Capricorn brings clarity regarding your hopes and dreams in life and your community. You are recognizing more of a need to be around like-minded souls and people who have similar goals as you, and you are going to be seeing new ways how to get there. Overall, there are a lot of growth moments happening for you in July, and you are learning through the inner awakening that is taking place for you now.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Kyra Jay for xoNecole
RELATED
October 2025 Astrology: An Overview
Mercury enters Scorpio on October 6, and Mercury in Scorpio only knows depth. The conversations being had this month are inspiring, transformative, and a little more blunt than usual. This energy is good for the power of persuasion and for asking for what you want, especially within business and financial matters. On the same day, we have a Supermoon in Aries, and this is a powerful Full Moon for reflection, owning your power, and letting go of the insecurities that don’t resonate with what you want for yourself and your future.
Venus, the planet of love, moves into Libra on October 13 after being in Virgo for the past month, and after some time of healing and clarity in love, Libra is here to bring in the romance. Venus loves being in Libra, and this energy creates new beginnings within relationships and provides a little extra magic in this area of life. With Pluto going direct in Aquarius on the same day after being retrograde since May, life and love move forward mid-October, helping provide more stable and nurturing foundations in your personal life and community as well.
The New Moon of the month occurs in Libra on October 21, making it a beautiful time for manifesting romance, balance, and harmony in your world.
This New Moon aligns with the Sun in Libra, and it’s all about letting a new beginning transform your world and the love in your life for the better. Scorpio Season officially begins on October 22, and Neptune retrograde enters Pisces on the same day, bringing in some water sign energy into the mix. As we close out the month, it’s time to renew, honor the transformations occurring, and know that your dreams aren’t as far out of reach as they may seem at times.
Read for your sun and rising sign below to see what October 2025 has in store for you.
What October 2025 Has In Store For Your Zodiac Sign
ARIES
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is all about perspective, Aries. This is the month to trust the divine timing of your life, and not let the what-ifs overwhelm you. With the Sun in Libra, your sister sign, for most of the month, October is about building connections, finding your balance in love, and knowing that you are worthy of what your heart is seeking right now. We have a Supermoon in your sign on October 6, and emotions are a little heavier this month, but also healing. Give yourself grace, and let go of what isn’t working for you.
Venus is in your house of love from October 13 until November 6, and there is a lot to look forward to when it comes to romance and the relationship dynamics in your life as you move through the month. It’s about being confident in your power of attraction and letting love come to you right now. Before October comes to an end, we have a New Moon in your 7th house of love as well, and with all this energy in your relationship zone, life changes for you in love for the better in October.
TAURUS
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is a spiritual month for you, Taurus. You are thinking a lot about your next steps ahead, and are getting organized, focused, and aligned. The Supermoon on October 6 is a time of reflection for you, and you are entering the month ready to let go of the past, heal, and create space for something new in your life. This month is all about trusting your intuition and letting your wisdom guide you in your personal growth and evolution.
You are more than where you have been, and this month is a reminder of that.
With Mars in Scorpio and in your 7th house of love all month, you are motivated by the partnerships in your life right now. Your love life and relationships are where the action is for you this month, and you are honoring your passion and direction here. Venus, your planetary ruler, moves into your house of health mid-month and into November, and you are leaving October seeking healthier habits, daily routines, and relationships. Overall, this month is helping you align with your vision.
GEMINI
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is a fresh start for you, Gemini. Your heart is free, love is beaming, and you are feeling larger than life. This month is about taking a leap of faith in yourself, honoring your confidence in life, and being your biggest advocate. With the Sun in your 5th house of self-expression, romance, and happiness, and with Venus entering this same area of your chart mid-October, there is a lot to look forward to right now, and things are looking up for you.
On October 21, we have a New Moon in a fellow air sign, and this is a good time to set your intentions for creative projects, hobbies, romance, and your overall happiness in life. There are a lot of little moments of magic unfolding for you this month, and this New Moon is one of them. Before October comes to an end, Mercury, your ruling planet, enters Sagittarius, and this brings open communication into your relationships, and you are having lively conversations and insights.
CANCER
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis is a transformative month for you, Cancer. You are moving through closure, healing, and depth as you navigate the opportunities that are coming into your life, with the stability you are seeking. With the Sun in your 4th house of home and family in October, this is the month to spend more time in your safe spaces, connect with your loved ones, and get grounded. You are also more focused on your financial world right now, and this is a good time for building new foundations for yourself and looking at the bigger picture when it comes to your career and life goals.
Mars is in your house of romance and happiness for the entire month, and this is one of the highlights of your life right now. You are passionate about your joy and all the things that light you up inside, and you are protecting your peace and giving more of your energy to your pleasure. Before the month ends, we have a New Moon in Libra, highlighting your home life, and some Cancers may be moving at the end of the month or getting the opportunity to turn a page here. Overall, this is your month to reflect, go within, and make sense of what has been restricting you from feeling stable.
LEO
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is about taking things one day at a time and being patient with what is presenting itself to you, Leo. This month, you are getting your ducks in a row and gaining the clarity needed to create a new beginning in your life. The month begins with a Supermoon in a fellow fire sign on October 6, aligning in harmony with you and fueling your need for adventure. You are going over the wisdom you have gained as of late and how it has shifted the way you navigate your life and see the world around you.
On October 13, Pluto goes direct in your 7th house of love, after being retrograde here since May. This is bringing in more balance, empowerment, and passion into your love life, and this is a positive change of energy for you after a time of some power struggles within your relationships. Before the month comes to an end, we have a New Moon in Libra, and this New Moon is the best time to set intentions for clarity, communication, and connection. October is about taking your time with things and knowing that everything is working out in your favor at the end of the day.
VIRGO
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis October is about finding your balance, Virgo. There is a lot of energy when it comes to your finances this month, but you may be overworking or overcommitting yourself in the process. Honor the opportunities and responsibilities in your life, but make sure you are equally taking care of your health and prioritizing your time and energy so that you don’t burn out. Venus, the planet of love, is in your sign until October 13; use this energy to your benefit and let things come to you.
You are a magnet for abundance, romance, and support if you allow yourself to receive it.
On October 13, Venus moves into your 2nd house of income, and your relationships are a supportive place for you to lean on right now. Your love life and partnerships are where your financial world is evolving this month, and this is a good time to ask for what you want; you never know what may happen. At the end of the month, Neptune goes retrograde in your sister sign, Pisces, and you are taking a step back and reassessing what love means for you right now. Overall, October is about remembering that you don’t have to do it all alone, Virgo.
LIBRA
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleLibra Season is here, and it’s your time to shine and thrive! This Libra Season changes everything for you, and October is when you really begin to feel this shift in your life. The Sun is in your sign until October 22, and it’s time to put yourself first. With a Supermoon in Aries as we begin the month as well, you are letting go of any unhealthy attachments or relationship dynamics that take you away from yourself, and are moving into deeper clarity.
On October 13, Venus, your planetary ruler, enters your sign, where it loves to be the most. With Venus in your sign for the rest of the month, love takes on a new tone, and you are feeling more love for yourself and where life is taking you right now. To end the month, we have a New Moon in Libra, and it’s time to set your intentions for where you want life to grow for you over the next year. This is a month of embarking on a new journey of self, and allowing what is inspiring you right now to build your confidence in yourself and your relationships.
SCORPIO
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is about honoring your freedom and your power to decide, Scorpio. A lot is going on for you this month, and you have the passion and energy to see things through. Mercury, the planet of communication, moves into your sign at the beginning of the month on October 6, and this is going to help you get your ideas across, making it a good month for business matters, networking, and getting inspired. With Mars also in your sign for the entire month, life moves forward for you in transformative ways in October, and you are a force to be reckoned with.
On October 13, Venus moves into your house of closure, healing, and endings, and you are ready to close one chapter of love and create space for a new one. You are in a contemplative space when it comes to matters of the heart, and you are ready to let go of any heaviness you have been feeling here. Scorpio Season officially begins on October 22, and you are ready to begin again. This Scorpio Season is about owning your confidence in life while letting go of insecurities or self-doubts that have been getting in the way of that.
SAGITTARIUS
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleEverything unfolds for you in a beautiful way this month, Sagittarius. You are flowing well with the energy of October, and life opens up to you. With the Sun in your 11th house of aspirations, dreams, manifestations, and community, you are feeling in balance with your desires and your reality, and are bridging the gap here. This is a month of friendship, believing in your dreams, and creating space for love. With Juno also entering your sign at the beginning of the month until the end of the year, you are attracting soulmates into your life.
On October 6, we have a Supermoon in a fellow fire sign, allowing you some closure in love and a chance at healing. Your heart is feeling renewed, and you are owning your power in creating happiness in your life. Before the month ends, Mercury moves into Sagittarius, where it will be until mid-November, and inspiration is heightened. Pay attention to the guidance you are receiving this month, the conversations you are having, and the light bulb moments that are going off for you right now.
CAPRICORN
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is about going within and connecting with the guidance of your soul, Capricorn. You are taking more time for yourself this month, and rightly so, as you need time to fully process what has happened so far this year. Pluto goes direct in your 2nd house of income, and this moves things forward when it comes to your earning potential, abundance, and values.
The key this month is in valuing yourself, your perspective, and what you are building in your life right now.
On October 21, we have a New Moon happening in your career zone, and this is a good time to manifest your goals within your professional world. Put yourself out there, show up, and know that you are worthy of success and that your dreams aren’t too big for you. As we close out the month, Mercury moves into your house of closure, even further facilitating your desire for contemplation and alone time this month. Overall, October is about taking care of your mental health, owning your successes, and finding your peace.
AQUARIUS
AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is a new beginning for you in love and in life, Aquarius. Your heart is feeling inspired, and there is a lot to look forward to right now. The Supermoon at the beginning of the month will be occurring in your 3rd house of communication, giving you the answers you have been looking for and helping you close the door on a chapter in your life that left you feeling misunderstood or misdirected. You are ready for a change of pace this month, and you are receiving that as we begin October.
Mid-October, Pluto goes direct in your sign after being retrograde since May, and this is a huge breath of fresh air for you and your path ahead. You may have been a little harder on yourself while Pluto was retrograde this year, and now you feel ready to forgive, move on, and own your power. Before the month comes to an end, we have a New Moon in Libra, and you are embarking on a new adventure. The end of the month is a good time for traveling, exploring, and gaining a new perspective.
PISCES
PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is giving you the guidance, perspective, and passion to see yourself with clear, loving eyes, Pisces. There is a sense of feeling more overwhelmed with life lately, and October is allowing you to gain the insight needed to move on from this energy, or at least see more of the gifts of what has occurred. On October 6, we have a Supermoon in an area of your chart having to do with self-worth, values, and income, and it’s time to see the gifts of what you have been investing in and valuing in your life, including yourself.
Let go of the need to play it small or count yourself out of important conversations, and know that you deserve a seat at the table.
With Pluto going direct in your 12th house of healing as we end the month, you are finally getting the answers you have been looking for emotionally, and it’s changing your perspective on your commitments in life and making you feel empowered. Before the month ends, Neptune goes retrograde in Pisces, and you are going to be moving through a personal revolution as we close out the year. You are inspired by change right now, and this month is what kicks starts this metamorphosis within you.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Kyra Jay for xoNecole
This is important to consider because, sometimes, it has to do with things that are transpiring outside of the bedroom — things that you would never even consider before reading this. That way, you can alter certain lifestyle habits and get your libido back to where it used to be (or you want it to be).
So, here we go — 10 things that could cause your sex drive to struggle a bit.
1. Too Much Sugar Consumption
GiphyI doubt that it will come as a surprise to you that, reportedly, 75 percent of people eat more sugar than they should on a pretty consistent basis. And when there is too much sugar in your system, this can lead to everything from high blood pressure and heart disease to diabetes and sleep issues.
Know what else a lot of sugar can do? Tank your libido. Sugar can make you more stress-filled. Sugar can lower testosterone levels (especially in men). Sugar can zap your energy levels. In women, sugar has a way of throwing sex hormones out of whack and it can even lead to vaginal dryness.
So, if deep down, you know that you’ve got a bit of a sugar addiction going on and you haven’t been up to having sex lately…it might be time to consider connecting those dots, sis.
2. Not Enough Vitamin D
GiphyThere’s no telling how many times I’ve said that we as Black people tend to have less vitamin D in our systems than we should. That’s mostly because our melanin makes it more challenging to absorb natural vitamin D from the sun. That’s why it’s important to spend time outside when you can, to take a vitamin D supplement and/or to consume foods that are rich in vitamin D like salmon, yogurt and mushrooms.
One way that your world will benefit if you do is your sex life will be better. Why do I say that? Well, believe it or not, when your vitamin D levels are low, that can weaken your estrogen levels — and estrogen plays a significant role in you having a healthy libido. Something else that vitamin D does is help your body to produce more dopamine and serotonin; these are neurotransmitters that help you to feel good, including while you are having sex.
I’m telling you — the more that we get into this article, the more you might realize that not being in the mood isn’t simply “in your head.” There could be some real health-related issues going on — ones that can pretty easily be corrected. Straight up.
3. Lots of Social Media Consumption
GiphyClose to two years ago, Psychology Today published an article entitled, “Do Sex Problems Rise With Increasing Social Media Use?” The paragraph that stood out to me this most was this one:
“The women who reported the most social media use were at increased risk of arousal problems, poor vaginal self-lubrication, orgasm difficulties, sexual pain, sexual dissatisfaction, and general sexual distress. The men who said they were addicted to social media faced a greater risk of low desire, erectile dysfunction, difficulties with orgasm, and overall sexual dissatisfaction.”
I mean, when you stop to think about the fact that social media has a way of triggering anxiety, impacting your self-esteem (and not always or necessarily for the better), pressuring you to compare your life to other people, putting your moods on an emotional roller coaster ride — not to mention all of this misinformation that it gives, even about sex…although most people spend a whopping 2.5 hours a day on social media, the advised amount is actually no more than 30 minutes every 24-hour cycle.
Listen, that might be hard to conceptualize doing but — do you want better sex or to be obsessed with scrolling through content that will be there tomorrow? Good lord. I hope you are going to choose the former.
4. Poor Communication in Your Relationship
GiphyYou don’t listen to each other. You’re hypercritical of one another. Your body language with each other conveys flippancy and dismissiveness. You hold grudges for days at a time. You’re both defensive and/or deflecting. You’re masters at giving each other the silent treatment. The two of you make lots of assumptions that oftentimes lead to baseless accusations.
These are just some examples of what it means to have poor communication in your relationship — and when you’re not mentally and emotionally connecting with your partner, that definitely can lead to less-than-satisfying intimacy. So, if any of this is currently transpiring in your relationship, the sooner you and your bae address your issues head on, the better things in your bedroom will be. I can just about guarantee it.
5. Certain Medications
GiphySome sources report that 50 percent of men and 40 percent of women say that they have some sort of challenges when it comes to their sex life. One of the things that causes those issues is the medications that some of them are on. Certain antidepressants can spike your serotonin to the point where it is hard to be in the mood for sex. Some blood pressure meds make it challenging for men to maintain an erection and women to have an orgasm. There are histamine blockers that can get people (especially men) out of the mood and mental health-related drugs that can make it hard to feel fully satisfied during sex. That’s the bad news.
The good news is that if you are on any of these types of meds and you do sense that they could be why you just ain’t feelin’ it, your doctor should be able to switch your meds or lower your dosage. That way, you can receive their benefits without them costing you sexual pleasure in the process.
6. Too Little AND Too Much Exercise
GiphyLife is all about balance — and something that truly emphasizes this point is exercise. Although a sedentary lifestyle is bad for your libido because it imbalances your sex hormones and keeps you from having the energy that you need to even engage in sexual activity, at the same time, too much exercise has a way of causing things that don’t exactly cultivate an environment for fulfilling sex: muscle soreness, sleep issues, irritability, elevated stress and less endurance (hmm…).
So, how much exercise should you get to keep this from happening? 150 minutes per week should just about get the job done.
7. Drinking Lots of Alcohol
GiphyWe’ve all heard it (somewhere) before that if you want to have a really (eh hem) good night, take a shot or two of tequila first. And although alcohol does have a way of lowering inhibitions (at least initially), in the grand scheme of things, it’s not the great sex elixir that you might think. Actually, research says that alcohol has a way of decreasing blood flow to the genital region, causing vaginal dryness and making it harder to orgasm once it really settles into your system.
Your better bet? Edibles or weed. I mean, if that is your thing anyway. Check out “Want More Frequent And Intensified Orgasms? Puff, Puff, Pass.” to gain a better understanding of why I say so.
8. Inconsistent Sleep Patterns
GiphyWhen you get a chance, check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand” and “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.;” both of them will encourage you to take sleep hella seriously if you want to have a consistent and fulfilling sex life. Sleep is essential because it helps to restore your system throughout the night, so that you are mentally interested in sex and physically capable to have the energy to engage in it.
9. Faking Orgasms
GiphyLife is too short to be fake — and I mean that in every way possible. And when it comes to sex, specifically, orgasms are too magnificent to be out here missing out, all because you are acting like you had one when you absolutely didn’t. And (pun intended) honestly, if that is what you are doing, I get why you wouldn’t be up for some action that often because who wants to be pretending like they are totally fulfilled sexually when that isn’t even close to being the case?
I am never going to be Team Fake Orgasm — ever. That said, if this is what has you ho-humming at sex, please check out reads like “15 Women Share Their Personal Hacks For Better Orgasms (And Sex Overall),” “How To Have Mind-Blowing Multiple Orgasms. Tonight, Chile.” and “10 Irrefutable Reasons To Have An Orgasm A Day.”
10. Stress
GiphyIt’s kind of wild that although sex is proven to lower stress levels, if you are completely stressed out, you might not be in the mood to have it in the first place. There are a few reasons why. Stress can raise your cortisol (stress hormone) levels which can, in turn, lower your sex drive. Stress can trigger you to rely on certain coping mechanisms like too much alcohol and/or caffeine consumption, staying up late at night (and not getting any sleep), not putting down your phone (or turning off your television) — and all of this can make you tired which can ultimately decrease your libido.
Stress can also have you so mentally and emotionally taxed that it’s hard to even get into the mindset to engage in sexual activities.
I’m telling you — a quote that I am gelling with more and more these days is a popular Bruce Lee one: “Be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way around or through it. If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves. Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.”
It reminds me to do what I can and not stress out about what I can’t. Besides, why let something get you so bothered that you can’t have sex because of it?
What in the world, chile? Absolutely not. LOL.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Giphy