"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude."
Ms. Angelou be preaching, ain't it?
While life is good for throwing us a curveball or two, no truer words have been spoken, especially when it comes to becoming the architects of our own lives and after 47 years of walking this earth, no one knows this better than our good sis, Tracee Ellis Ross.
Recently, Tracee sat down for the latest leg of Oprah's 2020 Vision Tour and got real about her journey to becoming the woman of her dreams, and for her, the road to personal freedom has been anything but linear.
Although the 47-year-old entertainer has worked hard to become the Black-ish Girlfriend Hollywood didn't know it needed, Tracee told Oprah that her original dream was to walk in her mother's footsteps and sing. She shared:
"There was this little girl in me who's original dream was to be on a stage in a sparkly dress singing. I think it was very unconscious that I tucked her away. It felt dangerous. It felt like I was gonna be obliterated and compared."
Being a woman with the audacity to live out her dreams is no small task, and Tracee says that this is a lesson she learned firsthand. The actress said while that the apprehension of being judged or compared eventually crippled her vision of becoming a songstress, she found her voice years later after finding the courage to sing in front of her mom (or anyone else) for the first time in her upcoming film, The High Note:
"Every time there was a moment to sing publicly with other people, I would make it funny because that way people wouldn't listen with the 'Diana Ross' kid ear.' It was as if I was walking around with not all of me because there was a part of me that wanted to shine, that I wanted to live and wasn't. So, it was like this arm tied around my back. [When she found out], her face was covered in tears, and she said, 'Finally.'"
Although Tracee's fear of flying may have crippled her dreams in the past, she is intentional about never making that mistake again. The actress shared that after four decades of life, she's finally become "more herself" than ever before.
"As I've gotten older, I've become more myself. And the more I am myself, the more my life looks like me ... I used to think it was my job to be this quiet demure, gentle woman, who would listen and smile. It's all over the movies. I feel like I grew up in her embrace, not in her shadow."
In her chat with Oprah, Tracee also confirmed that she is still ("happy and gloriously") single AF and that she's perfectly fine with that.
In a Valentine's Day post last week, Tracee shared that the best part about being single is being able to choose the frequency of love she surrounds herself with. She wrote:
"As a happily and gloriously long time single woman who also has a deep desire to be in romantic partnership with someone, Valentine's Day can feel tricky. But, I am reminded that although I don't have one special partner... my life is wonderfully full of so much special love. And one of my favorite parts of being single is how I get to choose who I spend my time with, share my heart with, hang with, giggle with, call, dine across from. I have cultivated a robust tribe around me and today on this designated day of love I hope that all of you in my tribe and all of you remember how lovable we are! Happy Valentines Day! #HeresToBestFriendsAndLovers."
Featured image by Instagram/@TraceeEllisRoss.