
Over the past year, I have been obsessed with crystal healing. My crystals have helped me have a deeper sense of connection to myself. There was a time when I invested so much in others and less in myself. Eventually, my investment in others hit a wall. I then decided to invest more in myself, which made for a better ROI. Investing in crystal healing has given me an ROI in acceptance, self-love, forgiveness, and having faith.
The art of crystal healing has become mainstream within the last few years. We've seen crystals being talked about all over social media. These days, everyone seems to have a crystal for almost every occasion: love, growth, money, better sex, bigger booty, etc. However, what about having a crystal for your zodiac sign?
In order to learn the crystal for you based on your zodiac sign, I spoke with tarot card reader Patrick Sykes and astrologer Jack Fuller, who is an expert on crystals. Together, they discussed the perfect tarot messages and crystals they have for each zodiac sign.
1.Capricorn

Garnet.
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Crystal: Garnet Stone
"Capricorns will be good with anything that is grounding, any crystal that is root chakra-based. Many Capricorns are good at capitalizing in the world, so they already have this connection to that root chakra energy. Garnet stone can very much help them dive deeper into the root chakra. Garnet can also help them balance because sometimes Capricorns have an overabundance of energy. Sometimes they can put so much energy into making a coin, they forget to call their momma. Garnet stone can help them balance all of that."
Tarot Message:
"Capricorn got the Four of Swords. They tend to pull into themselves, but the Four of Swords talks about pulling into your dreams. Now is the time to pull into your dreams and own them."
2.Aquarius
Crystal: Selenite
"Amethyst is our baby. Amethyst is really good for making a connection with the third-eye chakra. The third-eye chakra helps you see out into the distances, the distances of time, space, dimension, and also protects your vision in that way. Also, if an Aquarius is not drowning in selenite, then I don't know what you're doing. We need that clarity because we're so future-focused. We need that clarity, so we can come back in, and see what's right in front of us. Selenite helps us get that future information in the present context."
Tarot Message:
"The sun came up for Aquarius. The sun is a Major Arcana card. This card talks about bringing new life. Aquariuses are the water-bearer, and they really bring that excitement. The message is to focus on the sun when you need that excitement and renewal."
3.Pisces
Crystal: Pyrite and Moonstone
"Usually, a Pisces is great with a good Moonstone. Pisces should carry pyrite (fools gold). Pyrite is really good for transmuting negative energies. Pisces tend to be in the realm of that empathic space holder. They are either controlling the emotion in the atmosphere or are absorbing it. Pisces need to be able to manage the negative effects of that because they can take hold of them. Moonstone is also great for Pisces! We are used to Moonstone aligning [those who use it] from the root chakra up, the Moonstone does it from the crown chakra down and gets you aligned with the spooky stuff. Moonstone helps you through shadow work."
Tarot Message:
"The card I got for Pisces is the Queen of Cups. Pisces is a very emotional sign, it's a water sign. The Queen of Cups isn't about not having those emotions or concealing them. The Queen of Cups is more for control of all those emotions. Instead of becoming overwhelmed by those emotions, know the power of them."
4.Aries

Carnelian
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Crystal(s): Carnelian, Blood-stone, and or Red Jasper
"Aries is a real serious and fiery sign. Aries comes through with the heat! You might get burned. Carnelian would be good for Aries in managing the fiery-ness. Aries is generous, like really generous at heart. However, the generosity is on their terms and if not followed, they might not be so generous. They have to manage to give that fire to themselves and making the specificity their own. Blood-stone and Red Jasper can be good because it allows them to think before they act."
Tarot Message:
"The card for Aries is the World card, but in reverse. What this signifies is challenging how you arrive. Aries can tend to be stubborn because they are firm in their passions. For this, it's important to know how you arrive at this passion. The world card in reverse talks about circling back, like how did you get there? And making sure that is a valid place to be."
5.Taurus
Crystal(s): Malachite and Emerald
"Malachite comes in handy for a lot of earth signs in bringing rigidity to the heart, especially for Taurians. They are similar to Aries in that they have a plan that's going to be best for YOUR life. The difference between Tauruses and Aries is Taurses are closer to right. Taurus needs the ability to have their ideas for people's lives be adaptable. Taurians require the ability to adapt in their life. They have a hard time adapting their view of others and this affects their connection with others. Taurians wanting to help comes from a nurturing space, but they have to remember to not be overbearing. Emerald is the birthstone for May. An emerald crystal is good because it helps heal those emotional wounds."
Tarot Message:
"The card that came up for Taurus is the Eight of Cups. This card talks about you feeling emotionally empty and feeling like you're missing something. The thing that is missing is knowing the truth of your own emotions. The Eight of Cups talks about going there with yourself emotionally."
6.Gemini
Crystal: Pearl
"The Gemini birthstone is the pearl. A Gemini's sense of individualism is high, it can be good. However, it tends to be toxic more often than not. The lesson Geminis need to learn from the pearl is: 'There is not only one pearl in a clam, but a pool of twenty.' Remember, there is a pool of twenty you came here with. There is a lack of individualism and an interconnection to compartmentalize the voices they're hearing. Pearl can help Geminis deliver messages clearer than they hear it in their head."
Tarot Message:
"The card that came up for Gemini is the Princess of Wands. The Princess of Wands talks about not [taking] yourself so seriously that you forget why it was fun in the first place. Geminis are creatures of passion; they do things because they enjoy them. When the passions manifest into success and opportunity, it is because it came from a place of fun. However, they can get into their heads and get so mysterious that they forget why they started. The Princess of Wands says: 'Remember this started as something that brought you creative fulfillment and joy.'"
7.Cancer
Crystal(s): Jade, but really Rhodonite
"Jade inspires confidence. Cancers feed and absorb all those emotions in a way that tends to be more self-deprecating. Cancers will take all those emotions and personalize them. They need a lot of self-worth help, and Rhodonite is the best stone for that. Cancers need to dive into self-worth and understand that there is so much value in the ability to internalize other people's stories. They also need to realize that their own story is traumatic enough. Know your self-worth to know that you're worth not taking on other people's stuff."
Tarot Message:
"The card for Cancers is the Nine of Pentacles. This means: reaping the rewards of the seeds you planted, like seeing your garden grow. Knowing that because you put in this work (emotionally/financially, etc.), know that it's going to be beautiful when it grows. Take time to celebrate what you built."
8.Leo

Sunstone.
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Crystal(s): Sunstone and Tiger's eye
"Leos are missing people and places because being shiny in a cave doesn't do y'all much justice. There isn't a lack of confidence, but a lowkey fear vibration happening. Sunstone will set that fear into an intention. It's going to help decipher whether the fear is healthy or not. Fear is love in excess, so deal with it. Figure out what it is that you're loving in excess, so you can let it go, and release that fear. Giving it intent is going to give it context. Leos hate being indecisive, but love having options. There's a fear of letting go of those options because having those options brings comfort. You have to put that fear in good context so that you can let go of those options. Those options are beautiful, but they're not serving you. Tiger's eye will also give you guys the bravery that you need."
Tarot Message:
"The card for Leo is the Star. To be the Star, if you want to be at the center, also requires responsibility. You can't be at the center and not accept the responsibilities of being at the center. The Star talks about getting in tune with that. If you're going to be the boss, you're going to have to put in the work. If you want to be the center, you have to do the work that requires you to stay there."
9.Virgo
Crystal: Lapis Lazuli and Citrine
"Virgos are outspoken and they hold that overbearing nurturer energy. However, they are not good at saying what they mean. Virgos are very good at asking, 'What's wrong? What needs to be fixed? And how to fix it?' But, when it comes to expressing the truth of how they're feeling in a moment or about a person, it sometimes gets over-intellectualized or over-contextualized. Lapis lazuli is a good throat chakra clearer and breaks up blockages in the throat chakra. I'm also sensing that Virgos need some citrine. They just need some confidence. Virgos find your confidence, so you can get back into reflecting and loving yourself."
Tarot Message:
"The card for Virgo is the Wheel of Fortune in reverse. This card talks about letting go. Virgos need to detach themselves from the work that they do, instead of digging deeper. This can only lead to confusion between your work and yourself. Remember, it's important to compartmentalize parts of yourself. Use this to reevaluate to move forward."
10.Libra
Crystal: Pink Tourmaline
"For Libras, I would suggest Pink Tourmaline. They (Libras) are good at finding people of interest, but not necessarily good at experiencing the love that the person has for them, and expressing the truth of the love that they feel. There's a lot of desiring that love to look a particular way. Libras tend to get into situations where they are looking for something in relationships, rather than appreciating what is there. Libras need to allow themselves to experience the love that is coming towards them so they can understand what their love means. Pink Tourmaline will be good for experiencing love in a way that is pouring into you."
Tarot Message:
"The card for Libra is the King of Swords. This card is a card that represents air but is a very stern and opinionated representation of a person. What this signifies for Libras is: 'People will respect you more if you tell them what you actually think.' Libras feel like they have to be so many things for so many people. A lot of people also respect Libras, which is why people would respect what they really have to say."
11.Scorpio
Crystal: Aquamarine
"Aquamarine would be good! Scorpios have been trying to get a specific spiritual message across for a while. The spiritual message has to do with self-care, specifically spiritual self-care. Aquamarine will help you access different levels of calm that will give you the ability to release some frustration. Scorpios need this because they don't need any more reason to be icy."
Tarot Message:
"The Nine of Swords is the card I have for Scorpios. This talks about internalizing your own life fears and those fears can manifest into reality. Try your best not to do this! Stop giving your fears so much power and manifesting them into reality."
12.Sagittarius

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Crystal: Turquoise
"The stone that Sagittarius needs is some turquoise, so you can be honest with yourself. You can be honest with the people around you because you have good people around you. The people around see you and love you for who you really are despite your flaws. [You need] time to get a good understanding of yourself and be honest with yourself, so you can be more honest with the people that love you. Once you're honest with the people around [you], they can be of more assistance. Your friends are sick of you needing help, yet not knowing how to ask for it."
Tarot Message:
"The Ten of Wands are what came up for Sagittarius. We can see you bearing all that weight. [The] Sagittarius should know: just because you are taking on the responsibility of something, that doesn't mean it translates to burden. Stop taking on responsibilities as burden and weight. Instead, take them on as labors of love. You need to embrace the love of this responsibility."
For more of Jack and Patrick, follow them on Instagram: @gypjaq and @mx.sykes.
Featured image by Shutterstock
Originally published on March 8, 2021
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This Is How To Keep 'Holiday Season Stress' From Infecting Your Relationship
Hmph. Maybe it’s just me, but it seems like there is something really weird happening in the fall season air (because winter doesn’t officially begin until December 21) that cuddle season is in full swing while break-up season is as well. In fact, did you know that break-ups are so popular during the holiday season that December 11 is deemed Break-Up Day?
The reasons why relationships shift around this time vary; however, I did both roll my eyes and chuckle when I read that a very popular one is because it’s an easy way to get out of getting one’s significant other a Christmas present. SMDH.
Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
___
Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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Featured image by Shutterstock
Whew. Did you know that somewhere around 122 million Americans travel during the holiday season? Listen, I went to see my godbabies this past September and got caught up in a crazy ass traffic jam at BNA (the Nashville airport) that damn near has me considering air travel ever again — especially during this time of the year.
Besides, it’s not like it’s a written rule that you have to travel over the holidays. In fact, if you want to play it chill this year, why not enjoy a staycation instead? Although it might seem like it’s a “poor man’s compromise,” as you’re about to see, it actually…isn’t.
1. Go All Out with the Christmas Décor
GiphyThere is someone I know who is so obsessed with Christmas, she’s damn near annoying-borderline-terrifying. I’m. Not. Kidding. Yet hey, if you’re going to do a holiday-themed staycation (emphasis on “holiday-themed”), that’s kind of how you’ve got to be. Some décor ideas include:
- A fresh Christmas tree (is the most ideal) that is ultimately decorated
- Wreaths on outside and inside doors
- Garland (with twinkle lights) in predictable and unpredictable places
- Poinsettias
- Mistletoes
- Snow globes
- A stocking (with some of your favorite things in it)
- Fake snow
- Stars
- Angels
- Candy canes
- A BLACK Santa (LOL)
I mean, since you are going to be spending a lot of time at home, it can feel like a mini-winter wonderland if you are intentional about doing more decorating to your living space than you ever have before!
2. Buy a Couple of Christmas-Themed PJs
GiphyWhile I was doing some research on a totally different topic, I happened upon an article that talked about the psychology behind why we should be intentional about what we wear to bed. When you stop to think about the fact that (hopefully) you are sleeping somewhere between 6-8 hours every night, it would make sense that things like the color and fabric of your sleepwear would have a real impact on you — even subconsciously.
Well, when it comes to Christmas décor, specifically, not only does it take you back to nostalgic memories, it can also boost your moods. So, aside from being on-10 with your Christmas décor, also invest in some Christmas-themed PJs. Since you’re going to be doing a lot of lounging around (RIGHT?), do it in something that makes you think about all of your favorite things about this time of year.
3. Cop Some Christmas-Scented Candles
GiphyThere really is no telling how many articles that I’ve written where I am singing the praises of scented soy candles. Candles are soothing, comforting and a very easy way to reduce stress. Also, since it gets darker quicker and for a longer period of time around this time of the year, candles provide a relaxing vibe to your home. Since it is Christmastime, go with scents that are reminiscent of the season:
- Cinnamon
- Vanilla
- Cranberry
- Apple
- Pine
- Frankincense and Myrrh
- Peppermint
- Cashmere
- Ginger(bread)
- Orange
- Sugar Cookies
- Sandalwood
- Cloves
- Cedarwood
- (Hot) Chocolate
Personally, one of my favorite candle companies is Goose Creek. Their signature collections will have your entire house smelling like a high-end bakery. No exaggeration.
4. Play Some Winter-Themed ASMR Sounds
GiphyI’m from Nebraska and my mother was a New Yorker. So, if there is one thing that I like, it’s seasons and that includes snow during wintertime. Unfortunately, Nashville is cray-cray when it comes to that. If, where you live, the weather is all over the place too (which is why I think it’s insane that some people still give pushback to global warming) and you would like for it to at least seem like you are in your own winter wonderland — invest in some fake snow to strategically place around your home.
Oh, and don’t forget to turn on some winter-themed ASMR sounds too. YouTube has videos that run for hours on end that feature blizzards and howling winds that really can make you feel like you are in the midst of an ice storm.
5. Host a Holiday Movie Marathon
GiphyOne thing to remember about a staycation is it doesn’t mean that you have to be alone or that the only people who can participate are the ones who live with you. Since a staycation is simply about staying close to home instead of traveling afar — absolutely consider having some of your favorite people over for a holiday-themed movie marathon. Shoot, Black America Web even did you a solid by publishing “25 Best Black Christmas Movies Of All Time;” plus, Tubi has a Black holiday hits section of indie films too.
Oh, and make sure to get creative with the Christmas-themed snacks. Some ideas? Some Kentucky-fried turkey tenders with cranberry hot sauce (recipe here), some Holiday Hot Spinach Dip (recipe here), some Grinch Kabobs (recipe here), some roasted pecans (recipe here) and some Pomegranate Guacamole (recipe here).
6. Spend a Night (or Two) at a Hotel or Vacation House
GiphyJust like you don’t have to be alone during a staycation, you also don’t have to be cooped up in your house the entire time. Get a change of scenery in your own city by spending the night in a hotel that you’ve always wanted to try out or renting a vacation house for you and some of your folks to hang out in during the time between Christmas and New Year’s Day. I have a “love little sister” who does this randomly when she needs a break from her work as a therapist. She says that it’s damn near like taking a trip (and she has PLENTY of passport stamps; trust me).
7. Have Brunch or Dinner at a Christmas-Themed Restaurant
GiphyIf nothing puts a bigger smile on your face than the thought of DoorDashing meals and barely even touching your stove during your staycation — hey, I am right there with you. Do consider going out to brunch or dinner during your chill time, though. It’s another way to bond with people and create some current holiday memories. And if you’ve got a bae and you opt for dinner, it can be a wonderful type of Christmas-themed date.
8. Go to a Holiday-Themed Concert
GiphyBeing that I got my start as an entertainment writer, hear me when I say that I’m not someone who just has to go to a live concert every chance that I get. Oh, but baby, when I saw that El DeBarge was doing a City Winery tour and he was going to be here right before Christmas — I booked myself a ticket quick, fast and in a super-duper hurry! Shoot, I didn’t even want to go with someone because I plan to give him and that falsetto voice of his my complete and undivided attention. LOL.
I don’t know what it is about the holiday season that makes live music that much more enjoyable — but if there is a concert that features one of your favorite artists happening right through here, consider that to be a cool way to “tour your city” while cultivating a really awesome memory at the same time.
9. Also, Go Ice Skating
GiphyOne of my fondest memories of time with my father is going ice skating. We actually would do it in the summer (because that is when I would visit him) and, every year, he would get me a new ice skating outfit. Even now, when I watch someone ice skate (even in movies; like in the classic movie Garden State), I will have warm fuzzies.
Anyway, if you’ve never been before, go. If it’s been forever since you have, also go. There is something that is very sweet and so signature Christmas about it. Plus, it’s a top-tier form of exercise.
10. Take a Christmas Lights Tour
GiphyAnother one of my favorite Christmas memories is driving through neighborhoods and looking at the Christmas lights. And just like a Christmas concert can be a form of hometown touring, so can doing this if you decide to choose a couple of areas where you’ve never really been or rarely frequent.
Now are you excited about the thought of experiencing a holiday-themed staycation?
I thought you would be. ENJOY!
Featured image by Shutterstock









