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4 Tips From A Professional Life Coach On Manifesting Your Dream​ Career

Your thoughts and your energy can create your reality.

Workin' Girl

I believe in the power of manifestation, where your thoughts and your energy can create your reality. I've seen how the law of attraction can positively influence your dreams, hopes, and wishes. Even more, the beauty of seeing things change by aligning yourself with the possibilities.

There have many moments in my life where I've manifested trips, gifts, and even love. However, I've experienced a profound transformation in my career in the last three years by understanding that I am worthy of receiving my "yes". Here's the thing, it wasn't easy at times, honestly, sometimes it was painful. Manifesting required me to trust the process of life, by being flexible, and less resistant to change. Sometimes those are the lessons we must learn to have a breakthrough.

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  • In 2017, I was laid off from my marketing job. There were signs, but I ignored them. I was too focused on pursuing my passions outside of work. This forced me to reconcile with my choices, including not being diligent about finding a permanent position. The harsh reality caused me to fall out ofgratitude. My fears slowly started to eat away at me, and I invited them to the dinner table when I didn't have the heart to keep them away.
  • I applied to over 100 hundred jobs; I received only 10% of the interviews. All of the positions I thought were perfect for me did not work out. I took it personally.
  • After months of searching for a job, I found a position in my field of communications. The salary was liveable with an hour-commute. Two months into the job, I was told I lacked integrity and common sense, because I wrote for a popular website offering women of color advice. Additionally, I had used my LinkedIn profile for my endeavors, and I didn't change my job title quickly enough. There was no first offense, just an ultimatum, and I quit under duress.

I continued to attract low-paying, low-vibrational positions because, at that time, I was only looking for positions that paid the bills.

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That was my issue––putting money and feelings of a lack of abundance over finding meaningful work. Your dream career is the kind of work that makes your energy levels soar and gives you hope for great success. None of my previous positions made me feel this way. That's when I decided it was time to get clear on what I wanted.

By clearing the path to receive my blessings, I had finally landed my dream position at a prestigious university that came with a host of supportive colleagues. Just two years prior, I was Ubering in that same community, picking up researchers, professors, and students.

So, how did I do it?

Write Down Your Hopes, Dreams, and Wishes

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I wrote down everything my heart desired, from a salary to the work environment. I had enough experience with incompetent supervisors, so I asked the universe to provide me with leaders that focused on the personal growth of their team.

Align Your Vision With Action

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Aligning with my goals included updating my resume, expanding my network, and telling people what I wanted. Yes, that's right; I asked for what I wanted. Because I was doing the work, my network showed up for me as references and as cheerleaders. When manifesting, you must take action and move towards your desire. Once you start tackling something, it becomes more manageable, and it's easier to know what the next action is to take.

Empower Yourself

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As you move work towards your passions, you must continue to reaffirm positivity, because you are what you think. Staying in alignment with my goals required me to reframe my current situation with love, by giving myself grace, and taking stock of every opportunity, big or small. Focusing on what went right granted me peace, resilience, and the ability to fight and withstand adversity.

Visualize the Possibilities

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It's not enough to write your visions; you must visualize the possibilities too. Some people find vision boards helpful: a blank canvas to post images, quotes, affirmations, and drawings of anything you want to create in your life. Creating a vision board is a fun, tangible, and powerful way to say "yes please" to the abundance you'd like to receive (and deserve) in your life. Having a vision board next to my bed allowed me to come in contact with my dreams daily. The "perfect timing" was orchestrated to give me a boost of confidence when I needed it most.

Sometimes manifesting your dream career doesn't come neatly wrapped with a pretty bow. While it may take some time, the reward will pay in dividends. Trust the process.

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When I was ten, my Sunday school teacher put on a brief performance in class that included some of the boys standing in front of the classroom while she stood in front of them holding a heart shaped box of chocolate. One by one, she tells each boy to come and bite a piece of candy and then place the remainder back into the box. After the last boy, she gave the box of now mangled chocolate over to the other Sunday school teacher — who happened to be her real husband — who made a comically puzzled face. She told us that the lesson to be gleaned from this was that if you give your heart away to too many people, once you find “the one,” that your heart would be too damaged. The lesson wasn’t explicitly about sex but the implication was clearly present.

That memory came back to me after a flier went viral last week, advertising an abstinence event titled The Close Your Legs Tour with the specific target demo of teen girls came across my Twitter timeline. The event was met with derision online. Writer, artist, and professor Ashon Crawley said: “We have to refuse shame. it is not yours to hold. legs open or not.” Writer and theologian Candice Marie Benbow said on her Twitter: “Any event where 12-17-year-old girls are being told to ‘keep their legs closed’ is a space where purity culture is being reinforced.”

“Purity culture,” as Benbow referenced, is a culture that teaches primarily girls and women that their value is to be found in their ability to stay chaste and “pure”–as in, non-sexual–for both God and their future husbands.

I grew up in an explicitly evangelical house and church, where I was taught virginity was the best gift a girl can hold on to until she got married. I fortunately never wore a purity ring or had a ceremony where I promised my father I wouldn’t have pre-marital sex. I certainly never even thought of having my hymen examined and the certificate handed over to my father on my wedding day as “proof” that I kept my promise. But the culture was always present. A few years after that chocolate-flavored indoctrination, I was introduced to the fabled car anecdote. “Boys don’t like girls who have been test-driven,” as it goes.

And I believed it for a long time. That to be loved and to be desired by men, it was only right for me to deny myself my own basic human desires, in the hopes of one day meeting a man that would fill all of my fantasies — romantically and sexually. Even if it meant denying my queerness, or even if it meant ignoring how being the only Black and fat girl in a predominantly white Christian space often had me watch all the white girls have their first boyfriends while I didn’t. Something they don’t tell you about purity culture – and that it took me years to learn and unlearn myself – is that there are bodies that are deemed inherently sinful and vulgar. That purity is about the desire to see girls and women shrink themselves, make themselves meek for men.

Purity culture isn’t unlike rape culture which tells young girls in so many ways that their worth can only be found through their bodies. Whether it be through promiscuity or chastity, young girls are instructed on what to do with their bodies before they’ve had time to figure themselves out, separate from a patriarchal lens. That their needs are secondary to that of the men and boys in their lives.

It took me a while —after leaving the church and unlearning the toxic ideals around purity culture rooted in anti-Blackness, fatphobia, heteropatriarchy, and queerphobia — to embrace my body, my sexuality, and my queerness as something that was not only not sinful or dirty, but actually in line with the vision God has over my life. Our bodies don't stop being our temples depending on who we do or who we don’t let in, and our worth isn’t dependent on the width of our legs at any given point.

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