But what are the best sex positions for pregnant women, and do those positions only cater to people in specific trimesters? Luckily, birthing expert, teacher, and founder of Empowered Black Doula, Keshia Lockett, is here to answer some of our most pressing questions about the best sex positions for pregnant women, including women who may not be able to engage physically. Keshia explains that the task may not be the easiest, but it’s very doable and worth it, no matter what trimester you’re in.
Here are Keshia’s tips and tricks for having sex safely while pregnant.
What To Know About Sex During Pregnancy
"The best advice I can give is that it will not hurt you when you have sex while pregnant. The biggest thing to understand is that your baby is protected. Your baby is in the uterus. Your baby is surrounded by amniotic fluid, and there is no way for your partner to get that far up to harm your baby.
"And there is another barrier protecting your baby from that [which] is your cervix. Your cervix is down extremely low into your pelvis, another way you’re protected. So you can cross that off [your list of concerns] because there is no way to reach the baby. And you should be able to enjoy it as much as you want to enjoy it."
Sex During the First 3 Months of Pregnancy
"Before your belly grows, you have a free for all. You can pretty much do the same sex positions you were doing before pre-pregnancy. Everyone is different; some people’s [belly] start showing much earlier than others."
After the First Trimester: The Best Sex Positions To Try While Pregnant
1. Reverse cowgirl
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"When you’re on top but facing the opposite of your partner. That’s a very comfortable position, and you’ll have more control. You can control everything while also being more comfortable. Your belly isn’t on them too much, and they’re also comfortable."
2. Spooning
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"[For spooning,] you’ll want to lay the leg you’re lying on straight and your other leg up. And [you can] rest the raised leg on your partner for additional support."
3. Cowgirl
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"Another one where you’re on top and in control. [Control in terms of the level of penetration and motion of straddle.]"
4. Edge of the bed (table top)
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"[In this position,] your body is at the edge of the bed but not too much on your back. There are blood vessels in your back, and laying on your back while pregnant can cause breathing issues with the placenta, you, and the baby. So, I would suggest tilting to the side."
5. Doggy style
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"Everyone loves this one, and it’s the easiest one, too, because your belly isn’t in the way of this position."
How to Use Sex Toys During Pregnancy Safely
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"[During pregnancy], you can enjoy [sex] toys as much as you want to. And for many women, towards the end of their pregnancy, sex is uncomfortable. Sex toys provide you and your partner options when penetration isn’t as comfortable.
"Sex releases oxytocin, the primary hormone that makes you go into labor. I have had clients call me to tell me they were in labor and had sex the night before. So, therefore, using sex toys can release those hormones and put your body in labor.
"Sex can be achievable and pleasurable for everyone. Even rough sex is okay unless a woman is diagnosed with a short cervix. Then she has to avoid rough sex, or else she can go into preterm labor. And sometimes, their doctor will prohibit sex altogether and want their patient to stay away from an orgasm. If that is the case, she and her partner can focus on clitoris-stimulating toys, which is another reason sex toys are great.
"Unfortunately, Black women are more at risk for developing a short cervix, and having it can stop you from doing many things you enjoyed before pregnancy."
In addition to all of the insightful information Keshia provided, she also wants women to know that if they're at a stage of their pregnancy where they do not want sex as much or at all, there are other options for intimacy – dates, foot massages, baths together, etc.
Lastly, couples should listen to each other, listen to their bodies, and not be afraid to ask their doula or medical provider questions. That is what they are there for.
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But for whatever reason, her dating life has consistently been a topic of conversation and sometimes ruffles a lot of feathers. Black Twitter lit the internet up when the socialite made her relationship with the British actor Instagram official a few weeks ago. Some people even made off-color jokes about how she changes men like she does her underwear, or Damson is the next man she’s checking off her list.
Seeing how angry her love life makes people, especially Black men, is exhausting. Anytime her latest relationship hits the blogs, so does a slew of hateful comments calling her hurtful names and making assumptions about who she is. Now, not to sound like Chris Crocker (Cara Cunningham) or anything, but leave Lori alone.
Fortunately, there is one good thing about her overexposed dating life. It has revealed the poisonous double standards between men and women in the industry.
How can Future, Diddy, and others have a troupe of women and, at times, seemingly degrade those same women’s characters, but Lori can’t actively date as the 26-year-old that she is? Diddy appears to currently be dating several women (with one he recently had a baby with) including City Girls rapper Yung Miami. No one rarely says anything about how he moves but constantly attacks the women he’s dating online.
Let’s not even get started on Nayvadius aka Future. How many women have Future dated and publicly humiliated including Lori after dissing her in a song? Not to mention, at that time he was linked to rapper Dess Dior.
While Lori is often judged for her decisions in dating, others applaud her. Many Twitter users utilize her name as the “action” of leaving a man alone or the title of their next chapter in life. They applaud her for knowing her worth and not choosing to turn her wheels for the sake of a relationship.
Lori has clarified that she will not settle and nothing is wrong with that. She recently sat down with E! Newsand shared the details about her cover with Essence, her thoughts on love, including her father, Steve Harvey’s advice. When shooting the cover, Lori explained how it was an honor to grace Essence’s “Black Love Issue” as a single woman. Months prior, she called it quits with Michael and it was before her current relationship with Damson.
“I feel like it’s always been [about] me attached to something or someone: This time, it’s about me. It’s my time,” she said.
Lori also spoke about her growth – as a woman and individual – and how she won’t allow her past relationships to overshadow this period in her life. However, my favorite part was the advice she said her father gave her. “Just remember that you’re the prize always,” she playfully stated. So, what does his golden rule look like for the 26-year-old?
“It just means not compromising like, my values, my happiness, my peace. Not settling for less than what I know I deserve and not being afraid to walk away from a situation if it’s, like, no longer serving me,” she said
During her E! News interview, the entrepreneur admitted to finding the rumors about her “entertaining” and dispelled some of them, including dating a father and a son (alluding to dating Diddy and his son Justin Combs.) However, as she continues to grow, she is also allowing herself grace and letting the negative things people say roll off her shoulders. I can always stan a graceful queen who knows what she wants and moves silently.
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