Dascha Polanco Is Learning True Body Positivity One Nude Photo At A Time
It is a truly amazing feeling to be able to love the woman you see looking back at you in the mirror.
Our flaws can make us feel broken, and the concept of comparison can be overwhelming, especially when you never felt whole in the first place. These feelings of worthlessness and self-doubt create a negative self-image that we never actually agreed to. We are then prisoners to our physical bodies, left to suffer in what feels like hell forever. Dascha Polanco is among the women determined to break free from these chains.
After overcoming years of depression and self-loathing, the Orange Is The New Black star is taking her power back. Dascha recently spoke with Women's Health about how she is confronting her lifelong struggle with body positivity one nude photo at a time (peep that photo here).
"Reminding yourself of how strong you are is a powerful thing. I want to be mentally healthy, not just physically strong—that's what shines through the screen no matter what."
The 35-year-old mother of two made the bold decision to bear all in the magazine's latest issue, and shared details about when she first developed a negative self-image. She said:
"My whole life, I've had ups and downs when it comes to confidence. I remember looking at myself as a kid and knowing I was different than the other girls—I was chubby and curvier and had rolls and thick thighs. My school uniform skirt never fit right—it was longer in the front and too short in the back."
We can all relate, being a young woman is a real-life struggle. Not only do we have to endure periods and erratic hormones, but our bodies also sometimes develop in ways we aren't always comfortable with or confident about. As we become curvier and grow hips, bellies, and breasts, most of us, like Dascha, begin to formulate concepts about our bodies: what they are, what they should be, and most importantly, what they are not.
"In reality my body type was the norm, but I was always looking at it negatively and comparing myself to the super-slim 'cool girls.' I questioned my body—why couldn't it be like theirs? I just wanted to look like those girls."
From that point, Dasha's perceived value of herself decreased and ultimately began to affect her mental state. She created a cycle of negative-self talk that sent her into a spiral of depression. She told Women's Health:
"I got to a point where I wished I could cut off my rolls with scissors. I would grab at my thighs and say, 'Ugh, I hate you, you're ugly, I don't like you! Oh my God, I just want to get rid of this!' But talking to myself that way never made me feel better, just guilty."
Dascha, like many of us, was trapped within the unrealistic expectations of perfection that we set for ourselves when we were only children. It wasn't until she became a mother that she decided it was time for a change.
"The biggest shift in how I viewed my body happened when I became a mother 16 years ago. I wanted to instill in my kids self-acceptance and a sense of self-love. I wanted them to know they're unique and that that's what makes them beautiful. I wanted them to be confident, and I knew I had to model that."
This change included adopting a new standard of beauty, and taking the time to celebrate her eccentricities instead of focusing on her flaws. Dascha reminded us that one of the key ways to attain self-love is to master self-acceptance.
"I started focusing on the things I really love about myself. Like, I've achieved the dream I had my whole life to be an actress. That's incredible. I'm a leader and a volunteer in my community. And wanting to eat a burger doesn't impact my acting or my ability to help people. Neither does getting older—reaching new decades and going through physical changes is something we should celebrate, not fear. When I realized that, it helped me let go of the little things that bugged me and respect my body for what it allows me to do. I wanted to care for it."
Dascha's newfound self-care practices include exercise, meditation, and most importantly, changing the narrative of her self-talk.
"The most important change I've made is in how I talk to myself. Now, I look at my thighs, and I celebrate them. I say, 'I love you guys! You help me walk, you fill my pants up.' I thank my vagina for giving me my womanly power. It's important to talk to your body and thank your body."
Dascha's story is unwritten, and so is yours. Making the decision to invest in who she is, rather than the expectations of who she should be, turned out to be one of the best decisions of the young actress' life, but it wasn't easy.
Developing a relationship with yourself is the same as developing a relationship with a new friend or partner. Even when you may not be fond of their every characteristic, you love them flaws and all. The same is true for the relationship that you develop with yourself. She said:
"Learning to love yourself is just like learning to love someone in a relationship. You don't like every single thing about them, but you love them. You can love yourself without liking everything all the time."
To read the full essay, click here.
Featured image by lev radin / Shutterstock.com
- Dascha Polanco's conditions for getting naked onscreen | Page Six ›
- Dascha Polanco Flosses Her Nude Cakes For Women's Health ... ›
- Orange Is The New Black star Dascha Polanco poses naked for ... ›
- OITNB's Dascha Polanco Is Naked & Haute! [Stop & Stare ... ›
- Dascha Polanco Strips Naked For "Women's Health" Magazine Shoot ›
Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Sheila Rashid's Androgynous Approach To Unisex Clothing Is A Lesson In Embracing Individuality
The ItGirl 100 List is a celebration of 100 Black women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table.
For Sheila Rashid, it all started with some free-hand drawings and a few strokes of paint.
The Chicago-based clothing designer and creative director of Sheila Rashid Brand recalls using her spare time in high school to hand paint designs on t-shirts and distressed hoodies, distributing them to classmates as walking billboards for her art.
Rashid sought to pursue fashion design at Columbia College in Chicago but eventually took the self-taught route to build upon her knack for crafting one-of-a-kind, androgynous pieces.
Courtesy
Thanks to the mentorship of local designers taking her under their wings, Rashid was able to gain valuable experience in putting together collections and creating patterns; equipping her with them with the necessary skills to pursue her own collections.
After two years of living in New York, Rashid returned home to the Chi and uncovered the unique flair she could offer the city. “I moved to New York after that because I wanted to be in the fashion capital world,” she tells xoNecole. “That's when I really got a leg up. I found myself when I moved back to Chicago after moving to New York.”
For the Midwest native, inspiration comes from her time around creative peers and the city’s notorious winters — known to be a main character in many Chicagoans stories. “It's a different perspective and mindset when I'm making stuff because of the weather here,” she explains. “When we get summer, it’s ‘Summertime Chi’ — it's amazing. It's beautiful. Still, I find myself always making clothes that cater to the winter.”
"I moved to New York after that because I wanted to be in the fashion capital world. That's when I really got a leg up. I found myself when I moved back to Chicago after moving to New York.”
Courtesy
Many designers have a signature aesthetic or theme in their creations. In Rashid’s design story, dancing between the lines of femininity and masculinity is how she’s been able to distinguish herself within the industry. Her androgynous clothing has garnered the eye of celebrities like Zendaya, Chance the Rapper, WNBA star Sydney Colson, and more — showing her range and approach to designs with inclusivity in mind.
“I think I do reflect my own style,” she says. “When I do make pieces, I'm very tomboyish, androgynous. My work is unisex because I feel like everybody can wear it. I cater to everybody and that's how I try to approach my clothes.” From denim to overalls, and color-drenched outerwear, Rashid has mastered the structure of statement pieces that tell a story.
“Each collection, I never know what's going to be the thing I'm going to focus on. I try to reflect my own style and have fun with the storytelling,” she shares. “I look at it more like it's my art in this small way of expressing myself, so it's not that calculated.”
"My work is unisex because I feel like everybody can wear it. I cater to everybody and that's how I try to approach my clothes."
Courtesy
Still, if you were able to add up all the moments within Rashid’s 20-year career in design, one theme that has multiplied her into becoming an “ItGirl” is her confidence to take up space within the fashion industry as a queer, Black woman. “Being an ItGirl is about being yourself, loving what you do, finding your niche, and mastering that,” she says.
No matter where you are on your ItGirl journey, Rashid says to always remain persistent and never hesitate to share your art with the world. “Don’t give up. Even if it's something small, finish it and don't be afraid to put it out,” she says, “It's about tackling your own fear of feeling like you have to please everybody, but just please yourself, and that's good enough.”
To learn more about the ItGirl 100 List, view the full list here.
Featured image Courtesy