

I miscarried last year and it was one of the most devastating life occurrences I ever experienced. It surprised me how much it affected my day to day, my self-esteem, and my feelings of being capable of doing what I am supposed to be capable of doing as a woman. I did not even know I wanted a child until I realized one had been lost. The timing was more than wrong, so I deemed fate as a factor. But still, logic didn't counter the emotions I harbored about miscarrying. I felt broken to the point of no repair and the way I spoke to myself, looked at myself, and how I felt about myself mirrored that rupture.
I had no self-love to give to my self because I no longer vibed with the woman I was due to the overwhelming sense of failure I felt.
Self love is one of those things that you must learn and relearn every day and having a bevy of self care practices to help reinforce those lessons is one of the best things you can do for yourself. I am constantly on the hunt to find practices that help me connect with myself as a woman, and in turn, love myself more. When the opportunity to work with The Organic Blood Yoni Eggs company came into the picture, I deemed it as another act of fate. I had heard about yoni eggs especially amongst women who were more spiritually connected with their inner feminine spaces. I felt it was what I needed in my time of feeling less than and not feeling at all like a being of love.
Tiffany Janay, owner and founder of The Organic Blood Yoni Eggs company, assured me that Yoni Eggs are a tool to be used as a beacon of self love during the journey to connecting with your innermost you. That appealed to me.
“The womb space as a woman is our most powerful space. We are the creators of the world. It is our power that has brought all of this into fruition. That's why it's called Mother Earth because it is the feminine energy that gives birth to things."
Yoni is a Sanskrit word for “vagina," and the eggs are semi-precious stones that come directly from the earth, which is where they pull their magical and powerful energies from. Similar to the way you use herbs for their properties, these semi-precious stones possess similar properties. They are polished up and shaped for internal use and each one has different properties intended to heal us from within.
Yoni eggs are excellent “teachers" and can help you with strengthening your vaginal muscles through Kegel exercises and will result in your vagina tightening. It also assists with the strengthening of the uterine wall and assists women with bladder control and can make your sex life more fire. I was also informed that due to its energy, if you were to have sex with your partner while the egg was still inside of you, it'd feel something like a threesome between you, your bae, and another person. It was the aspect of energy I was drawn to.
I was looking forward to having the egg help me on my journey to love me better and feel like a woman again, since I no longer felt that bond with my womb, as I felt betrayed. It was fitting that the egg I used was Rose Quartz. It's known for its healing properties of love, self love, compassion, forgiveness, romance, and intimacy. Things I needed to work on since experiencing my loss. I needed help, I needed some sort of guidance that would help me with looking within for the self-love I used to refer to as abundant.
It was a little intimidating at first – I'm not going to lie – especially when you think about putting the larger part in first. As a woman, there are certain things you grant access to entry in your body and a semi-precious stone isn't one of them so I took my time with that part. I carried it around with me in my bra everyday for about a week to get acquainted with it and its energy as Janay suggested.
After cleansing it and charging it with my intention (“to love myself more"), I massaged it and myself with some coconut oil, and promptly inserted it into my yoni. In all honesty, it's difficult to put into words how using this egg makes me feel. I don't know if it's a power of thought or how I feel about spirituality in general, but I do think having this tool to channel my energetic efforts towards positive thought has helped me feel more connected to myself and talk to myself in a more forgiving manner.
I use it once a day for about half an hour and use a warm bath to help with channeling it out of my body. Some women use it all day, some use it during sex – I am not quite there yet lol, but I enjoy my twice a week nightly routine with it. Being touched by that good energy is something that radiates. It's in the glow of my skin, the strut of my step, how I relate to other people, but more importantly how I relate to Sheriden (me). I punished myself for far too long for something that is a part of life.
Of our feminine power, Janay says, “Being confident in yourself and getting to know yourself. I think a lot of us are lacking confidence because we don't have a strong foundation, history, and connection to our feminine power. Being born in the feminine, you already come from something powerful."
Learn more about Yoni Eggs here.
Featured image by Shutterstock
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Devale Ellis On Being A Provider, Marriage Growth & Redefining Fatherhood
In this candid episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Devale Ellis, actor, social media personality, and star of Zatima, about modern masculinity, learning to be a better husband, emotional presence in marriage, fatherhood for Black men, and leading by example.
“I Wasn’t Present Emotionally”: Devale Ellis on Marriage Growth
Devale Ellis On Learning He Was a ‘Bad Husband’
Ellis grew up believing that a man should prioritize providing for his family. “I know this may come off as misogynistic, but I feel like it’s my responsibility as a man to pay for everything,” he said, emphasizing the wise guidance passed down by his father. However, five years into his marriage to long-time partner Khadeen Ellis, he realized provision wasn’t just financial.
“I was a bad husband because I wasn’t present emotionally… I wasn’t concerned about what she needed outside of the resources.”
Once he shifted his mindset, his marriage improved. “In me trying to be of service to her, I learned that me being of service created a woman who is now willing to be of service to me.”
On Redefining Masculinity and Fatherhood
For Ellis, “being a man is about being consistent.” As a father of four, he sees parenthood as a chance to reshape the future.
“Children give you another chance at life. I have four different opportunities right now to do my life all over again.”
He also works to uplift young Black men, reinforcing their worth in a world that often undermines them. His values extend to his career—Ellis refuses to play roles that involve domestic violence or sexual assault.
Watch the full episode below:
On Marriage, Family Planning, and Writing His Story
After his wife’s postpartum preeclampsia, Ellis chose a vasectomy over her taking hormonal birth control, further proving his commitment to their partnership. He and Khadeen share their journey in We Over Me, and his next book, Raising Kings: How Fatherhood Saved Me From Myself, is on the way.
Through honesty and growth, Devale Ellis challenges traditional ideas of masculinity, making his story one that resonates deeply with millennial women.
For the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker peels back the layers of masculinity with candid conversations that challenge stereotypes and celebrate vulnerability. Real men. Real stories. Real talk.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by YouTube/xoNecole
We Thought All-Inclusives Were Boring Until We Found These Twin Jamaican Gems
I’m not your typical all-inclusive resort girlie—especially for a couple’s trip. My man and I usually hop from one Airbnb or boutique hotel to the next, cooking our own meals, and chasing off-the-beaten-path adventures. But after eight years of host ghosting, catfish listings, and DIY travel stress, we decided it was time to switch gears. Our latest Jamaica baecation was the perfect excuse to give an all-inclusive resort a fair shot.
We landed on Couples Negril and Couples Swept Away—two Jamaican family-owned sister properties nestled in western Jamaica. With Caribbean roots dating back to 1949, this wasn’t just any chain resort—it had legacy and soul. And honestly? It was the reset we didn’t know we needed.
What made it even more special? We were back in the place where we first fell in love, now creating new memories in the same sun-drenched paradise. From booze cruises, pickleball matches, and wellness shots, to alluring late-night jacuzzi rendezvous, soul karaoke, and far too much champagne mixed with tequila, to really good jerk chicken and repeat-visit-worthy Asian cuisine, bae and I had a time.
Couples Negril And Couples Swept Away: Twins On The West Coast Of Jamaica
And it’s fitting that we visited in June (which is considered low season—a time when there are less travelers and better deals) because these sister resorts are like Gemini twins that embody two distinct sides of the same spirit.
Set between Negril and Hanover, Couples Negril is the social butterfly, full of energy and artistic flair; Couples Swept Away is the introspective dreamer, grounded in nature, wellness, and tranquility.
While they’re quite opposite in vibe, they’re united by a shared history and reflect the classic Gemini duality: light and shadow, play and peace, expression and reflection.
Bae’s Favorite: Chic, Modern, And Cozy At Couples Negril
Couples Negril Suite
Courtesy, Couples Negril
Bae’s favorite was Couples Negril—which has more than 230 rooms and spans 18 acres—for its mix of entertainment, modern minimalist vibes, and a diverse crowd of couples. He especially loved Otaheite Restaurant with its low-lit red velvet love seats and dishes meshing luxury with traditional island flavors (like the merlot stewed rabbit served with coconut polenta and the filet mignon with the jerk glaze.) And he lives for hearing me sing, so the piano bar was our jam.
We also spent lots of time at the beach bar, one of five on the property, snacking on fish tacos and sipping margaritas just steps from our suite.
We saved the rum for the included catamaran cruise (book ahead!), which came with endless punch and views of Negril’s West End—a fave spot of ours. Couples Negril made the all-inclusive life feel surprisingly easy and fun.
The property also features a treehouse spa, two pools, four jacuzzis, an au naturale beach (whew, chile!), and sports facilities. Everything was easy to access—the layout felt cozy and well-organized, making it simple to move between activities and amenities. At this resort, you can really have some grown-and-sexy fun without it feeling like a raunchy spring break episode of Couples Gone Wild.
My Favorite: Private, Classic Charm, & Nature Mystique At Couples Swept Away
Couple's Swept Away Suite
Courtesy, Couples Swept Away
While I loved Couples, once we stepped over to Couples Swept Away, the lush nature set on 19 acres won me over. This twin, which has 312 suites, 7 restaurants, 8 bars, 3 pools, 5 jacuzzis, and a spa, leans into intimacy and seclusion, and I felt like we had more privacy and room to explore–just the two of us—at this property. The rooms are rustic-luxurious, dressed in island cedar, with classic shutters and expansive verandahs that have hammocks where you can enjoy bright flora, the sounds of exotic birds, and the sea views.
The absence of TVs—along with its tropical fantasy allure— meant a 10 out of 10 experience for me. This resort invites couples to breathe deeper, slow down, and truly get to the core of intimacy, all within the hum of nature.
There were hidden enclaves with dipping pools, jacuzzis, open-air cafés, and quiet corners where you can sit by ponds filled with fish and bird watch (or have a little sneaky link with bae!)
One of my favorite stand-out amenities at this resort: the 10-acre fitness complex just a short walk across the road from the main property where I’d have my early-morning me-time while bae slept in. It has 10 tennis courts, squash and racquetball courts, a fully equipped gym, and a wide range of wellness and fitness classes are held there. I also enjoyed turmeric and ginger shots at the wellness bar.
Other standouts for food and nightlife included Lemon Grass (where you can enjoy Asian-inspired food and listen to the live music coming from downstairs), the chic Patois Bar (which was the late-night hotspot overlooking one of the pools and serving your usual bar fare like burgers and quesadillas—felt like we were at a Miami nightclub), and the Aura Bar (where bae sang with a quintet of other slightly drunken men and where we did the cliche but super-lit millennial couple thing: danced the night away to Top 40 hip-hop, salsa, and rock classics).
The Patois Bar
Courtesy, Couples Swept Away
Baecation Tip: Just be sure your partner packs a few linen or dress pants, loafers or soft dress shoes, and a few button-down shirts for the restaurants that require reservations. Also book your table and all-inclusive excursions in advance (or on the first day you arrive at the resort).
All in all, this resort-hop wasn’t the stifling, prison-in-paradise all-inclusive experience I remembered from the Jamaica family vacations of my youth. It also wasn’t the stereotypical AI disaster of bland food, lackluster customer service, and senior citizen activities that many complain about on social nowadays.
Both resorts offered a fresh take on luxury, great food, and good vibes—all without losing the intimacy we craved. All-inclusives might not be our every trip vibe, but for this chapter? It was exactly what we needed, and we look forward to making repeat bookings at both Couples Negril and Couples Swept Away in the future.
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