July is about healing, focus, and making a change. Cracks in the foundation are being shown, and depending on your perspective, you can move forward toward change or entertain the negatives. Perspective is everything, and as the month begins in Cancer Season, emotions can cloud your vision. Thankfully, the Capricorn Supermoon on July 3rd will be bringing things back to reality and helping you find your ground through the emotional whirlwind that has been. This Full Moon is an activating time that’s creating breakthroughs, building new bridges, bringing things full circle financially, and shining the spotlight on what needs to be seen.
There is even more earth energy flowing through the collective in July, with Mars entering Virgo on the 10th, where it will be until August 27th. Mars in Virgo is dedicated, compassionate, and efficient. Mars in Virgo gets things done, focuses on good health, and lends a helping hand to those who need it, and this is where a lot of people are taking action right now. This month there is positive energy flowing toward acts of service, routine, and creating order; however, be careful not to get lost in the details and perfectionism that you miss the full picture. On July 11th, Mercury enters Leo, and mentally, there is a strength here that is helping those overcome any mental burdens that have been influencing their daily life.
On July 17th, there is a New Moon in Cancer that will be closing out Cancer Season. This New Moon is a good time to set your intentions for love, emotional harmony, family, and the home. This New Moon is highlighting the emotions but is creating an opening to greater love, protection, and honesty where needed. This new Moon is about meeting your needs, dreaming the dream, and showing up for love. A few days later, on the 22nd, Venus goes retrograde in Leo, and Leo Season begins. This is when things really start heating up and when change prevails. Venus will be retrograde in Leo until September 3rd, and egos are more likely to clash during this time.
Honor the value of self-love, and you will see how this directly influences your relationship experiences with others.
As the month comes to a close, Chiron, the wounded healer, goes retrograde in Aries from July 23rd until December 26th, and Mercury enters Virgo from July 28th until October 4th. Healing is taking place in July, and sometimes it happens when we least expect it. The more you can find the balance between your head and your heart right now, the more you can see things clearly. July is therapeutic and is needed.
ARIES
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is all about going after what you want, Aries. Focus on your positive intentions and create a plan to succeed. You have the energy, the charisma, and you are in the right place to make things happen this month. Mars, your ruling planet, moves into your 6th house this month, and you are all about good energy, good health, and creating routines that both nourish and bring order to your daily life.
You are someone who is independent and who loves to do things alone, and this month you are realizing that you can accomplish your personal goals with others by your side. The New Moon on the 17th of this month is happening in your 4th house of home, and you are connecting to those that have your back and support your well-being. July is a perfect month for you to set your intentions and show up.
TAURUS
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is a time of finding your balance, Taurus. You are feeling in tune with the ebb and flow of life, and you are seeing a positive return on the things you have been investing in. Energy is everything, and you are receiving the abundance that you have been giving. A Supermoon is happening in a fellow earth sign at the beginning of the month, Capricorn, and July 3rd will be a time of clarity, closure, and happiness for you. Don’t be afraid to communicate your needs this month, Taurus.
Moving into July, Venus goes retrograde in Leo until September, and for you, you could be spending more time at home over the next few months. Your safe spaces are where you feel most comfortable and loved, and right now, that’s with your family, close loved ones, and objects of treasure. Over the next few months, you will be tuning into your heart and discovering where you want to lay down new roots, where you can give yourself more TLC and self-care, and who you want along with you for the ride.
GEMINI
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is a month of communication, executing your plans, and seeing through the smoke and mirrors. You are rising above what’s been and are ready to see things in the light, Gemini. At the beginning of the month, you are feeling things through and taking the time to honor your emotional well-being, rest, and seek more time tending to your own needs. You are prioritizing your time and energy and focusing on the things that truly matter to you at the end of the day.
The New Moon happening this month on the 17th is a time for you to set intentions when it comes to your finances, income, balance, and self-confidence. This New Moon is urging you to see how willing you have been to see a new beginning here and will be opening new doors that you will have to find the courage to walk through. Venus goes retrograde for the summer toward the end of July, and for you, this time will be helping you communicate more effectively and to re-discover some of your truths.
CANCER
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleCancer Season is underway, and July is a month of love for you, Cancer. This is a time when partnerships in your life are thriving, and your life is colored by love. You have come to such a good place emotionally that you can’t help but to rejoice in where you are and your current reality. Things are changing, but you are embracing every moment of it. The Supermoon on July 3rd will be when you begin to see these changes and growth within love and when you are getting the full picture of some important relationships in your life.
The July New Moon will be in your sign on the 17th, and this New Moon is a magical one. You are in tune with the universe, and where your life is is where you want it to be. Set your intentions for the path you see for yourself in the future, and don’t be afraid to take risks right now. July is all about investing in yourself and your relationships. You have what it takes to feel balanced in not just one but many areas of your life, and this is the month that’s opening that door for you.
LEO
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is all about owning your strength, Leo. You have been moving mountains, and this is another one of those months where some more courage is needed. Your mind is especially active this month with Mercury entering your sign on the 11th, and this energy can lead to overthinking. Meditate, find your ground, and gain new inspiration. You are protected as you prepare, focus on yourself more, and figure things out this month.
The New Moon on the 17th is when you are ready to let go of the past, heal, and see how better things will be for you when you free yourself from past burdens. You deserve healing, and as Venus goes retrograde in Leo from the 22nd until September, you are finally getting that opportunity to heal. Leo Season begins on the same day, signifying a time when the focus is on you and your heart and when you are experiencing a personal transformation.
VIRGO
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is a month of abundance for you, Virgo. Your cup is full and overflowing, and you are feeling gratitude for the blessings that are appearing for you now. This is a month to honor your skills, dedication, work ethic, and determination and to accept your due rewards with an open heart. The Supermoon at the beginning of the month is showering some love and receptivity in your life, and you are feeling heard and seen in July, Virgo. You are entering the month with an inner confidence that is leading you to success.
Mars enters your sign on the 10th, where it will be until late August, and you have more energy at your disposal during this time. You are all about action and putting in the effort, and your spirits are high this month. Mercury enters Virgo before the month ends, and more energy is working in your favor. Your mind is in the right place, and you are turning dirt into diamonds. This month is reminding you that you deserve to enjoy the successes you work so hard for, and there is plenty of it to enjoy.
LIBRA
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is a month where you get to take a deep breath, Libra. You have been worried about the things you are seeing come to fruition this month and seeing that everything turned out better than expected for you. Your career, finances, and safety nets are a big priority for you right now, and you are experiencing positive revelations here this month. The Supermoon happening at the beginning of July is helping you feel more grounded and fruitful and is bringing good energy into the home for you.
The New Moon happening later in the month is aligning with your 10th house of career and achievements, and you are claiming your successes. You have been working on your skills and mindset and are in a position now where you can help inspire and give opportunities to others. You are seeing growth financially in July, and life is coming full circle for you. Before the month ends, Venus goes retrograde in Leo, and this for you will be tapping into your friendships. Try to see all perspectives and focus on building your community right now.
SCORPIO
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis is an inspiring month for you, Scorpio. You are feeling enlivened after somewhat of a stagnant year, and you are reaching for the stars right now. One thing is happening after the other, and you have been looking forward to this change of pace. The Supermoon on the 3rd will be opening up new channels of communication for you and will be giving you some clarity on the answers you have been looking for. You are ready to move on from what hasn’t been working and are effectively seeing new pathways and opportunities in your life.
Mars moves into your 11th house of hopes and dreams, friendships, and community in mid-July, and you are spending more time around your soulmates and your people over the next month. You are in a social time in your life, and there are plenty of fun experiences to be had. Venus goes retrograde at the end of the month and will be bringing things into perspective when it comes to your career, reputation, and where your heart stands with how you are showing up for your goals. Be patient when it comes to what you are trying to achieve right now.
SAGITTARIUS
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleDivine timing is everything this month, Sagittarius. Your intentions will seed to fruition, but some more time may be needed right now. Remember that protection can sometimes look like rejection and that what is meant for you will be for you. With Mars aligning in your career zone over the next month, you may be feeling more pressure to perform, to be successful, and to reach the goals you have been working towards. However, don’t forget to appreciate where and who you are now while you strive for what you want to become.
There is a New Moon on July 17th that will be in your 8th house of commitment and intimacy, and you are getting an opportunity to see where you feel that emotional receptivity in your life and where you can be a little more vulnerable and experience more growth here. Giving yourself and others grace is key this month, and it's best to not take anything personally. Venus goes retrograde in a fellow fire sign, Leo, at the end of the month, and it’s best to plan out all of your adventures thoroughly over the next few months.
CAPRICORN
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is the start of something new for you, Capricorn. You are ready for a new adventure, and you are embarking on one right now. This is the month when you are seeing previous roadblocks disappear and new life appear. There is a Supermoon this month on July 3rd, and it’s happening in your sign. You are closing out a chapter of your life that felt more personally limiting to you and are breaking free from what has been. This Full Moon is a time of letting go of what was and getting excited about what’s to be, and this is an impactful time for you.
Mars moves into Virgo on the 10th and moves into your house of adventure, travel, education, and spirituality. The next month is a great time for you to travel, spend time in nature, and explore the world around you. This is an inspiring month for you overall, and you will be getting into a lot of different fun activities. The New Moon happening before the month ends is occurring in your sister sign, Cancer, and love is moving into a new chapter for you. Your willingness to move forward is creating more room for love to enter your life.
AQUARIUS
AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleIn July, you are embarking into the unknown, Aquarius. You are taking a leap of faith in yourself, and you are trusting that the universe will be there to catch you. You are finding your balance with what you are working on letting go of and where you want to be, and you are being nudged to get out of your comfort zone more this month. The Supermoon happening at the beginning of the month will be helping you overcome fears and see where this has been coming from so that you can heal and let go where needed.
Moving further into July, there is a New Moon on the 17th, and this is a good time for you to set your intentions for your daily life, routine, health, and working world. Get things in order this month, and focus on what is going to benefit you now and in the long term. Venus goes retrograde in Leo on the 22nd before the month ends, and you are going to be learning a lot about love and your close relationships and will be experiencing a rejuvenation and change here over the next couple of months.
PISCES
PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecoleFireworks are going off for you this month, Pisces. July is about seeing the growth in your life and about enjoying the present moment. You are free to be, to live, and to love, and you are feeling all the things this month. With a Supermoon at the start of the month happening in your house of hopes and dreams, you are feeling inspired to live your life to the fullest and to nurture the things that light you up inside. You deserve to take those moments out to enjoy your life, and you are great creative when doing so right now.
Mars moves into your sister sign, Virgo, on July 10th, and you are motivated to connect, focus on your one-on-one relationships, and express your heart. You are feeling the passion for love and your relationships, and love is in the air for you in July. What you believe, you can make a reality, and you are seeing some of your intentions for love manifest for you this month. The New Moon on the 17th will be ushering in some more good energy into your love life, and this is a month of romance for you. Look at new beginnings in your life as the blessings they are, and have fun this month, Pisces.
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Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
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Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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And so, since this is the time of year when catching a cold (and/or the flu) is common, let’s talk about the impact that sleep (and again, a lack thereof) has on your immune system. That way, you can remain as healthy as possible during the fall and winter seasons.
1. Less Sleep Means More Colds
GiphyLike I stated in the intro, I’m pretty sure you’ve heard somewhere that the fall and winter are the seasons when people are most susceptible to catching a cold or coming down with the flu. And that’s exactly why I thought I would start this all off by sharing the fact that some studies reveal that if you get less than six hours of sleep, on a consistent basis, you end up making yourself more vulnerable to coming down with both. In fact, some research says that only 18 percent of people who get six-plus hours of rest caught a cold while almost 40 percent who got less than that did.
The logic behind it all is sleep gives your body time to build up the proteins and cells (like cytokines and T-cells) that you need to fight off certain viruses. So, if nothing bothers you more than having a stuffy nose or stubborn cough when it’s cold outside, getting more sleep is one way to prevent that from happening to you.
2. Less Sleep Means More Allergy Symptoms
GiphyAt the end of the day, an allergy is basically what transpires whenever your immune system “overreacts” to something that other people’s systems do not. And since sleep is what helps to keep your immune system nice and strong — well, I’m sure you get how less allergy-related symptoms and more sleep go hand in hand. Also, since sleep helps to decrease bodily inflammation (more on that in a bit) and inflammation can also intensify allergy symptoms, that’s just one more reason to get as much shut-eye as possible.
3. Less Sleep Means Potential Diabetes and Heart Disease
GiphyDid you know that in 2024, Black women were diagnosed with diabetes 24 percent more than any other adult demographic. Also, it continues to be a reality that heart disease is the leading cause of death for Black women. These two sobering statistics alone should be enough of an incentive to do whatever you can to keep the risk of diabetes and heart disease way down.
One way to do that is by getting more sleep. Aside from the fact that sleep strengthens your immune system to where it is easier for you to fight off illness and diseases, sleep can keep your blood sugar levels in a healthy space; plus, when it comes to your heart, it gives it, along with your arteries and blood vessels a break.
4. Less Sleep Means Less Time for Your Body to Push “Reset”
GiphyIf you really stopped to consider all that your body goes through during the day (you can read some about that here), you definitely would respect it enough to do your best to thank it by giving it no less than six hours of sleep, each and every night. Sleep is what helps to slow your brain and body down so they are able to “refuel” for the next day. After all, how can your body prevent you from getting sick if your immune system is too worn out to fight ailments off? Exactly.
5. More Sleep Helps You to Fight Off Infections
GiphySpeaking of, in order for your body to fight off infections, there are certain cells and antibodies within you that need to be healthy and strong — one way that they get and stay that way is by you getting a good amount of sleep. For instance, remember when I touched on cytokines earlier? Well, the same way that they help to prevent colds, they also help to prevent infections too. And since sleep lowers your cortisol (stress) levels, rest gives your body the time and space to build up an army that can fight off free radicals and other health-related challenges while you are awake.
6. More Sleep Lowers Bodily Inflammation
GiphyWhenever a health-related issue is mentioned on this platform, inflammation is something that is mentioned quite a bit. Probably the easiest way to explain inflammation is it’s how your body responds/reacts whenever something is happening to your body that shouldn’t be, whether it’s an illness, an injury, a germ or something that you may be allergic to.
If you happen to have chronic inflammation, some symptoms that are associated with that include fatigue, stiff joints, skin rashes, weight gain and moodiness.
The interesting thing about all of this is if you aren’t getting enough rest, you could be triggering inflammation in your body. That’s because studies reveal that a lack of sleep can elevate molecules that are associated with inflammation. So, if you don’t want inflammation to increase within your system, you should definitely catch more zzz’s.
7. More Sleep Regulates Hormones
GiphyWhen it comes to hormones like serotonin, estrogen and cortisol, believe it or not, they play a role in how your immune system acts and overreacts. That’s because, if your hormones are out of balance, that can cause your immune system to work harder than it actually should and that can make you more vulnerable to sickness. One way to keep your hormones leveled out? SLEEP.
That’s because sleep gives your body the opportunity to rest, repair and restore your hormone levels. On the other hand, when you are sleep deprived, that can put/keep your hormones on the ultimate roller coaster ride. #notgood
8. More Sleep Strengthens Vaccines
flu shot GIF - Find & Share on GIPHYGiphyIf you’re someone who is good for getting some sort of vaccine around this time of the year, make sure that you rest up before and after getting your shots. Not only does adequate rest before a vaccination help your immune system to be better receptive to your shots but sleep also helps your body to build up enough antibodies to make your vaccinations effective after getting them. Because if you’re gonna get pricked, shouldn’t it be worth it? My thoughts exactly.
Get some freakin’ sleep! Your immune system depends on it.
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