6 Reasons To Fall In Love With Your Flaws
Growing up, I had a really bad relationship with my teeth. Although things were cool when I was a little girl, once my adult ones came in, it seemed like my teeth were so big that they overtook my entire face (I've got the pics to prove it). As if that wasn't bad enough, I also had an overbite, a little overcrowding on my front bottom teeth and my left front tooth protrudes slightly more than my right one. Ugh. Out of all the things that are "wrong" with my teeth, that annoys me the most.
I begged my mother to take me to the dentist. Beyond semi-routine cleanings, she didn't. It wasn't until I was well into my 30s when she explained that even though she knows she should have, she didn't because she had an illogical fear of the dentist herself.
As pissed as I was about having these teeth of mine, there are two distinct things that happened that helped me to make peace.
For one thing, back in the day, I used to do a little bit of modeling. During a shoot, I mentioned to the husband/wife photography team that I wanted to get braces. Both of them paused and shook their head "no". The husband then said, "Braces aren't always a good thing. They can totally alter your facial structure and, believe it or not, mess up your smile."
The second thing that happened was the death of my father. My smile — lips, overbite 'n all — I get from him. Now that he's gone, it's weird but it's like I get a glimpse of him every day whenever I look in the mirror. Ironically, that makes me smile. Big.
Both of these life moments have taught me the same overall point — flaws are not something to be ashamed of or even something that we should be consumed with changing. As you'll see in just a sec, if your perspective is healthy, your so-called flaws can actually be the best thing about you (physically).
6 Ways To Embrace Your Flaws
1.Flaws Are What Make You Unique
Recently, I checked out "Here Are the Most Beautiful Women in Each Country". As I scrolled down, some of the women caught my eye (like Kate Menson from Ghana, Samantha Harris from Australian Aboriginal, Nona Gosa from South Africa and actor Teyonah Parris who represented US/Africa). On some level, all of the ladies had something attractive about them, but to me, many of them were not memorable.
Whether it's a semi-jacked up tooth like mine, a birthmark that might be on your face, any eye that is slightly lighter or darker than the other — whatever your "flaw" may be, choose to see it as a mark of distinction. It's something that sets you apart and makes you stand out.
And really — would you rather be cookie-cutter-pretty or someone who is truly memorable? Personally, I prefer Door B.
Feature image by Getty Images.
Related Articles:
This Author Is Using a Children's Book To Make Owning Your Flaws Mainstream – Read More
This Photo Series Highlights The Power Of Our Flaws – Read More
Chasing Perfection Took Me Away From God – Read More
Feeling Yourself Is The Vital Step To Finding The Love Of Your Life – Read More
- Love Your Flaws Because They Make You Whole | Thought Catalog ›
- Why You Need To Either Love My Flaws Or Let Me Go ›
- Boost Self-Esteem By Loving Your Flaws And Failures ›
- 7 Reasons Why It Is Important To Embrace Your Flaws ›
- 12 Things I've Come to Learn About Love – Chris Hill – Medium ›
- 4 steps for falling in love with your flaws - positively present ›
Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next June (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at missnosipho@gmail.com. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Sheila Rashid's Androgynous Approach To Unisex Clothing Is A Lesson In Embracing Individuality
The ItGirl 100 List is a celebration of 100 Black women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table.
For Sheila Rashid, it all started with some free-hand drawings and a few strokes of paint.
The Chicago-based clothing designer and creative director of Sheila Rashid Brand recalls using her spare time in high school to hand paint designs on t-shirts and distressed hoodies, distributing them to classmates as walking billboards for her art.
Rashid sought to pursue fashion design at Columbia College in Chicago but eventually took the self-taught route to build upon her knack for crafting one-of-a-kind, androgynous pieces.
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Thanks to the mentorship of local designers taking her under their wings, Rashid was able to gain valuable experience in putting together collections and creating patterns; equipping her with them with the necessary skills to pursue her own collections.
After two years of living in New York, Rashid returned home to the Chi and uncovered the unique flair she could offer the city. “I moved to New York after that because I wanted to be in the fashion capital world,” she tells xoNecole. “That's when I really got a leg up. I found myself when I moved back to Chicago after moving to New York.”
For the Midwest native, inspiration comes from her time around creative peers and the city’s notorious winters — known to be a main character in many Chicagoans stories. “It's a different perspective and mindset when I'm making stuff because of the weather here,” she explains. “When we get summer, it’s ‘Summertime Chi’ — it's amazing. It's beautiful. Still, I find myself always making clothes that cater to the winter.”
"I moved to New York after that because I wanted to be in the fashion capital world. That's when I really got a leg up. I found myself when I moved back to Chicago after moving to New York.”
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Many designers have a signature aesthetic or theme in their creations. In Rashid’s design story, dancing between the lines of femininity and masculinity is how she’s been able to distinguish herself within the industry. Her androgynous clothing has garnered the eye of celebrities like Zendaya, Chance the Rapper, WNBA star Sydney Colson, and more — showing her range and approach to designs with inclusivity in mind.
“I think I do reflect my own style,” she says. “When I do make pieces, I'm very tomboyish, androgynous. My work is unisex because I feel like everybody can wear it. I cater to everybody and that's how I try to approach my clothes.” From denim to overalls, and color-drenched outerwear, Rashid has mastered the structure of statement pieces that tell a story.
“Each collection, I never know what's going to be the thing I'm going to focus on. I try to reflect my own style and have fun with the storytelling,” she shares. “I look at it more like it's my art in this small way of expressing myself, so it's not that calculated.”
"My work is unisex because I feel like everybody can wear it. I cater to everybody and that's how I try to approach my clothes."
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Still, if you were able to add up all the moments within Rashid’s 20-year career in design, one theme that has multiplied her into becoming an “ItGirl” is her confidence to take up space within the fashion industry as a queer, Black woman. “Being an ItGirl is about being yourself, loving what you do, finding your niche, and mastering that,” she says.
No matter where you are on your ItGirl journey, Rashid says to always remain persistent and never hesitate to share your art with the world. “Don’t give up. Even if it's something small, finish it and don't be afraid to put it out,” she says, “It's about tackling your own fear of feeling like you have to please everybody, but just please yourself, and that's good enough.”
To learn more about the ItGirl 100 List, view the full list here.
Featured image Courtesy