I remember calling my grandmother, who has since transitioned, and hearing the passion in her voice when she explained how she’d never thought she’d see something like this happen and how much it meant to her. As I reflect, I realize it’s a combination of memories like this that undoubtedly encouraged my will to vote.
However, as an adult, my reasoning behind the practice has developed. It’s no longer just about “the right thing to do.” I feel a responsibility to myself and my future to know the issues, how they impact me, and make a difference for others.
In the times we’re in, there's so much “news” everywhere. It’s hard to distinguish fact from opinion and bias from beliefs. This is why it was such a pleasure speaking with Jara Butler, Chief Impact Officer of Supermajority. Supermajority is an organization focused on making women the most powerful voting bloc in the country. During this authentic and informal conversation, we talked about so much.
I learned about her time working with the Obama campaign and how she masterfully worked in multiple industries, and we shared some of our favorite female rap moments. However, in the snapshot you’ll read, we focused on the issues. Jara walked xoNecole through what’s most affecting women of color in this election and what we can do to be more aware. Whether you’re a politics girlie or like me, just trying to gain more insight, hopefully this convo connects with you.
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xoNecole: Let’s just jump right in. What are some of the most popular issues that you hear Black women discussing related to this election?
Jara Butler: Our sister organization, the Supermajority Education Fund, recently did some research specifically looking at young women in the age group 18 to 35, and young Black women identified their economic well-being as a priority. Right now, we're in a place where a lot of us, especially young Black women, are finding that meeting those basic needs are harder and harder.
Secondly, is Project 2025. I think Black women see it as not just something that could happen, but actively happening. For example, we’ve all been watching the case with the Fearless fund, and how it's been targeted. We know Black women are very entrepreneurial. We can go back to Madam C.J. Walker and others who have opened the door for all of us to achieve. But if those barriers are in place, we're just not going to be able to meet that.
Lastly, Repro is a very big issue. But I think looking at it holistically and not just about abortion is important. Black women are more likely to talk about this from a perspective of our reproductive health care and the lack of access due to medical racism. As a Black woman myself, who's over 40, a lot of the changes that I am making in my life are because I have to do everything I can to put myself in a position, because I know no matter what my economic status is, if I walk into a medical office, there's a good chance I'm gonna face medical discrimination. Breast cancer screenings, colon cancer screening, ovarian cancer screening, cervical cancer screenings - all of those are part of that network of reproductive health.
xoN: Another issue I’d love your insight into is our missing girls. I think it's so unbelievable how much this is swept under the rug. There are so many stories about Black women that are continuing to go missing; I don’t understand how that’s not a bigger conversation. Is this something that can be pursued on the government level and what can we do to bring more attention to this issue?
Jara: We have this list of majority rules on our website, and my favorite one is: that our government represents us. I think that we have to continue to apply pressure to our government to meet our needs. And again, women are the majority of voters. Black women, especially, are the most reliable voting bloc across all groups, and our interests right now are not being met. So yes, there is something that we can do, but I also am a big proponent of us having these conversations.
My great-grandmother was enslaved, my grandmother was born into Jim Crow, and I watched my mother face economic insecurity. I say that because, as a Black community, we have to have an internal conversation to talk about these issues, and we have to do it upfront. I think we have to get into a position of realizing that we do have power, and how we activate that power.
Our power comes from being Black folks because Black people organizing has been enough to shake up and scare people. There were laws that prevented us from congregating together, even at church, because they knew what would happen when we got together. We have to get back into that. It's not that we are not doing it, but the urgency needs to be greater. And finally, we have to get away from depending on one individual to take us there. It's gonna take all of us.
"Our power comes from being Black folks because Black people organizing has been enough to shake up and scare people. There were laws that prevented us from congregating together, even at church, because they knew what would happen when we got together. We have to get back into that. It's not that we are not doing it, but the urgency needs to be greater."
xoN: I agree completely. Now, when we started, you mentioned money. So let’s talk about it. So many of us are starting businesses and getting degrees, and I love to see it. But everyone seems to still be having a lot of the same issues around finances. What are some of the underlying reasons behind this debt that we're dealing with, and how can voting influence these challenges without getting into the individual candidates?
Jara: Hello! Let’s talk about the money! Black women have been told that if we want to move ahead, we have to have that master's degree. We have to be twice as good. So we met that measure, right? But in order to do that, we have to pay for it. Up until about the 1970s college was absolutely affordable. You could work one job and pay for college with some money left over. That has changed.
Realistically, student loans are a barrier. They are a barrier to access housing. They impact our credit, and really and truthfully, depending on how much your loans are, they could affect you paying rent. It basically creates a cycle of debt. And I have real problems with people who say, get a degree in something that's going to make money. It’s about your skills, and if you have the skills, you should be able to earn a living. That covers that.
But the fact is that student loan debt continues to increase, and there have been attempts, more than once, to try to relieve some of that pressure. The reality is that this is a squeeze. It is a conundrum, and we see efforts by the current White House administration to try to alleviate those things, even when they are stopped.
But truly, Congress needs to step in and support this, but I would take it a step further. We should be considering and looking at what it would look like if we had free community colleges. Because what we have now is two generations of borrowers, because older millennials’ children are beginning to age. Black women have the highest degree of second-degree secondary education, but we carry like 1.7 trillion in debt or something like that. I can't remember the exact number, but basically, the majority of the student loan debt is ours.
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xoN: Speaking of college, obviously there’s a lot of discussion around affirmative action in the schools and the undergoing changes. How important is it to consider this topic, and are there any new laws or policies being proposed around this that we should be aware of?
Jara: Oh my goodness, affirmative action is one of the things that we saw that our sister site, the Supermajority Education Fund, found last year as a number two issue for young women. I actually hypothesized that it was a real thing, and it was. And the reason for that is that affirmative action as a whole has been something that benefited white women more than any other group.
However, what is happening is that we’re using the word DEI in a way that is derogatory. I’ve heard people refer to it as: “didn't even earn it.” And as a Black woman who attended an amazing school, I remember being in class and having someone make that comment, knowing my grades were higher than theirs.
The fact of the matter is that we would not need these policies if we lived in an equal and equitable society. It doesn't do us any harm for us to face the facts that this country was built off the backs of enslaved people and the blood of indigenous people, and off the sweat and the tears of immigrants. But because we are unwilling to face that, we now are demonizing programs that are actually meant to create some symbol of balance.
xoN: Finally, I’ll close with this, what can we do to provide information to young people, and how do we combat all of the less than researched info?
Jara: One thing I encourage is to look at the source. At Supermajority, our social channels are information-based. We strive to provide up-to-date accurate information that is digestible to all. Media literacy is something I believe in, and unfortunately, it is something that we have a responsibility to continue to share with the community at large. So much of our world is centered on immediate info, a lie spreads faster than the truth.
We just saw that with the Olympic women's boxers, and we have to ask ourselves often: is this information accurate? Who is telling the story? Most importantly, how am I an original contributor? Not everything said needs to be shared, and not every thought needs to be public.
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Sherri recognized a need in her community and decided to act on it. Today, she is not only a thriving entrepreneur but also a published author, business coach, and motivational speaker.
Additionally, her daughter is following in her entrepreneurial footsteps. Together, they are the dynamic duo behind the Offices at Dogwood Park. Within this building, Sherri and Janaya operate their Success Suite, offering cost-effective conference rooms and business suites for emerging entrepreneurs.
Janaya also runs her own business, Belle Lux Day Spa, which occupies a quarter of the building and exemplifies the family's entrepreneurial spirit.
Sherri J’s journey was far from easy, and throughout this process, she’s learned a great deal about the childcare industry, money management, and the power of determination. She shared a bit of her journey with us in today's Money Talks.
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On how she got started:
"Well, I fell pregnant very early in life, at 14 years old. That's what molded me and the rest of my life. I had to learn responsibility very, very early. I had to be a mother all while balancing being a teenager, trying to find and learn myself. Having that type of responsibility at such an early age gave me a quicker start at life.
"Anyway, my daughter's father’s side of the family was into childcare. I had to work for them to kind of earn my keep and to take care of this new child that I had sprung on everybody. So in working for her father's side of the family, I learned the childcare industry – really unbeknownst to me. I was kind of being molded into being the person that I am today. Then I decided I wanted to step out on faith and try to open my own childcare center; I did that by 24. Long story short, that's what got me to where I am today."
On her initial relationship with money:
"I didn't have the option or experience to be good with money. I didn't know anything about it. My mom was just the average everyday working woman trying to make ends meet. I didn't know what a wealthy lifestyle was. I didn't know what having money looked or felt like. I think I got my first understanding of it when I met his family and saw what they had. That's when I knew we didn't have money."
On stepping out on her own:
"I was very scared because, at this time, I was working as an executive assistant to the principal for [the] Atlanta Public School System. So I was making maybe $35,000 in my early twenties. I had always been in corporate America. I worked for Wachovia Bank (Wells Fargo) and H&R Block and felt like I had gotten a good job at the school system.
"I mean, 16 years ago, $35,000 was a lot of money for a 21-year-old. But I knew that I wanted to always be a resource for my daughter, and even on $35,000, I was barely making ends meet. I had enough to pay my rent, my little car note, and maybe buy some McDonald's here and there."
On using her taxes for startup money:
"When I made the decision to jump into childcare, I had saved three years' worth of tax returns. At the time, I was getting between a $2,500 to $4,000 return. And one year, I just decided not to spend it. Also, I was saving like $100 out of each check. For two years, I ended up with about $5,000 – so that was my startup. I literally just buckled down and decided not to waste the money."
"When I made the decision to jump into childcare, I had saved three years' worth of tax returns. At the time, I was getting between a $2,500 to $4,000 return. And one year, I just decided not to spend it... For two years, I ended up with about $5,000 – so that was my startup. I literally just buckled down and decided not to waste the money."
On her favorite splurges:
"Sadly, I do not splurge. I like cars so when I want a new car, I'm going to get one. But that's not all the time. You know? I really don’t do much for myself. Everything I do is always for other people. My life is really 'complex-simplicity.' But for my 40th birthday last year, I threw a huge party and went to Turkey. That was the beginning of me doing more for myself. Oh, and property! I’m responsible, but I’ll buy a property in a minute."
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On money-lessons she learned the hard way:
"I was never taught budgeting, so I had to figure it out on my own. And honestly, most Black people are counting and spending their money before they get it. So mentally, they know exactly what they do and don't have.
"Childcare is fast money. If you set up shop in the right location, you can go from $0 to $40,000 quickly. And this happened so early on in my business and so fast that I was out having fun, spending all this money, but I wasn't growing the business that I started.
"You gotta think, I went from getting around $1,200 every two weeks to $8,000. But I learned very, very quickly that I couldn't be gone on vacation 24/7 because no one was running or growing the business. And so it wasn't until that $8,000 a week was $2,500 a week, then $1,800 a week, that I realized I didn’t have as many kids to care for!"
"Childcare is fast money. If you set up shop in the right location, you can go from $0 to $40,000 quickly. And this happened so early on in my business and so fast that I was out having fun, spending all this money, but I wasn't growing the business that I started."
On real estate and passive income:
"I'm a licensed Realtor in both Georgia and Florida, and I became licensed in both states because I invest in real estate. I own the buildings for all my childcare centers outright, with no mortgages. I also own the buildings for any business I operate; I don't rent from anyone. My investment portfolio is focused on real estate because it consistently gains value, and you can always generate income from it.
"Whether you choose to start a business or rent it out, real estate offers flexibility. If you need to access funds, real estate allows for that too. I always recommend investing in real estate because it has worked well for me."
On a final, personal money-saving tip:
"I would say, if your business is a heavy cash flow business, meaning you get a lot of cash but also accept credit cards, checks, and etc., save the cash that you do not need. Put that cash in savings, don’t ride around with it. That way you don’t think twice about spending it."
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However, unfortunately, the dangers of these platforms are getting more and more severe. I’ve personally been in cars where men have asked about my views on dating, politics, and more- only to drop me at my house 10 minutes later – talk about awkward. I’ve also heard more startling stories where friends felt so uncomfortable that they hopped out of a car to avoid potentially dangerous situations.
Personal testimonies like this are why I was so excited to learn about HERide, a woman-owned, Black-owned rideshare service based in Atlanta, GA. Check out xoNecole’s conversation with the founders, Jillian Anderson and DeVynne Starks, below to learn more about their business, ongoing strides in the tech community, and why you need to add HERide to your travel hacks list ASAP.
Jillian Anderson (L) and DeVynne Starks (R).
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xoNecole: Let’s start at the beginning. Can you tell me a little bit about yourselves?
Jillian Anderson: From a young age, I've been deeply involved in sports, earning scholarships for basketball and volleyball at Albany State University. My passion for competition and resilience was further honed during my time playing professional basketball in Morocco, where, unfortunately, an injury brought me back to the U.S. Throughout my journey, I've always been drawn to technology and entrepreneurship. Starting with selling candy bars in grade school, I later founded a successful fashion brand called BEA$T during my college years.
My background in computer science and my entrepreneurial spirit laid the foundation for HERide. The challenges I faced as a tech founder are nothing compared to the determination and drive instilled in me through sports and entrepreneurship. These experiences have shaped me into the competitor I am today within the tech industry, where I continue to push boundaries and innovate for HERide's mission.
DeVynne Starks: Growing up around entrepreneurs, I quickly understood both the hard work that entrepreneurship requires and the freedom that it offers. After earning my Bachelor's degree in Mass Communications from Albany State University, where Jillian served as my RA and we first connected, I pursued a Master's Degree from USC Annenberg in Communication Management with a focus on Public Relations.
My career path led me to establish Cultiv8PR, a boutique agency specializing in PR, social media, and content creation. We've worked with diverse brands across various industries, always prioritizing diversity, equity, and inclusion in our strategies. I'm passionate about storytelling and have a knack for finding unique narratives that resonate and cut through the noise.
In 2022, Jillian approached me to co-found HERide, recognizing my dedication to client success and my commitment to driving impactful change. Together, we've grown HERide into what it is today, leveraging our combined strengths in technology, entrepreneurship, and communications to make transportation safer and more inclusive for everyone.
xoN: What made you start HerRide?
Jillian: As the CTO and founder of HERide, my journey began from a deeply personal place. During my time as a rideshare driver for Uber and Lyft, I consistently heard from women about their concerns and fears surrounding safety when riding with male drivers. Women would share stories of relief when they saw a female driver approaching or even canceling rides until a woman arrived. Some would go as far as asking to be dropped off at a nearby location if a female driver was unavailable.
These experiences opened my eyes to a significant gap in the ridesharing industry—a lack of options that prioritized women's safety and comfort. In 2019, I founded HERide with a clear mission: to provide a safer and more inclusive ridesharing experience for women. We launched our app in 2020 on both Google PlayStore and the Apple App Store, and in 2022, with the addition of my co-founder DeVynne Starks as our CMCO, we began offering live rides.
HERide is about more than just providing convenient transportation. It's about challenging the status quo and advocating for meaningful changes in ridesharing safety regulations. Women's voices had been silenced, and their needs overlooked for far too long. We made it our priority to give women the option to choose a female driver if that makes them feel safer and more comfortable.
Our vision is to be disruptors in the industry, not only by offering convenience but also by integrating cutting-edge technology to enhance safety measures. We are committed to transforming the ridesharing landscape, ensuring that everyone, regardless of gender, feels secure during their journey. HERide is not just a service; it's a movement toward greater safety and equality in transportation.
xoN: Have you dealt with pressure to open the platform to men? How do you combat that?
DeVynne: While our primary focus is on providing a safe and inclusive platform for women and non-binary individuals, we also welcome everyone to use our services. Our decision to prioritize these groups stems from a critical need to address long-standing issues of safety and comfort that have been overlooked in the ridesharing industry for far too long.
From the outset, we designed HERide to answer the urgent call from women and non-binary individuals who often felt unsafe or uncomfortable during ridesharing experiences. Our commitment to safety is evident in the technology we've implemented, such as piloting biometric features and our rigorous 1:1 driver onboarding process.
While many men have been supportive of our mission, we understand there may be questions about why we choose to prioritize specific demographics. We ask those who question this decision to consider the urgency and importance of feeling safe during transportation. If you were in a situation where your safety felt compromised, wouldn't you want a service that prioritizes your well-being?
It's important to note that by prioritizing women and non-binary individuals, we aim to improve safety standards for everyone. Our ultimate goal is to transform the entire ridesharing landscape by advocating for better safety measures that benefit all passengers. We believe that everyone deserves safe and secure transportation, and HERide is committed to making that a reality for everyone who uses our platform.
It's important to note that by prioritizing women and non-binary individuals, we aim to improve safety standards for everyone. Our ultimate goal is to transform the entire ridesharing landscape by advocating for better safety measures that benefit all passengers. We believe that everyone deserves safe and secure transportation, and HERide is committed to making that a reality for everyone who uses our platform.
xoN: Do you have any plans to expand, can you walk me through your process to scale the business?
Jillian: Expanding HERide to other major cities is definitely part of our vision for growth. Currently, we are focused on scaling our operations in Atlanta, Georgia, where our goal is to onboard 1,000 drivers who each complete 10 rides per week. Achieving this milestone will ensure that we have a robust and reliable service in place before expanding further.
To support this expansion, we are actively raising funds with a target of $1.5 million. These funds will be crucial in enhancing our technology, expanding our marketing efforts, and establishing a strong operational base in Atlanta.
Once we've successfully met our driver and ride targets in Atlanta and secured the necessary funding, we plan to identify and evaluate potential new cities for expansion. Our expansion strategy will involve careful market analysis, assessing demand, regulatory considerations, and establishing local partnerships to ensure a smooth and successful launch.
Ultimately, our goal is to replicate the success we've achieved in Atlanta by offering safe, reliable, and inclusive ridesharing services to more cities across the country. We're excited about the future growth of HERide and the opportunity to make a positive impact on transportation safety and accessibility for all.
xoN: It's a big deal to be the first Black-owned rideshare company to partner with Hartsfield Jackson Airport in Atlanta. What does that mean to you, and how did you advocate for yourself – particularly when it came to the signage?
DeVynne: Being the first Black-owned rideshare company to partner with Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport in Atlanta is a monumental achievement for HERide, and it means everything to us. Jillian and I have always seen ourselves as disruptors, driven to challenge the status quo and create meaningful change. Our journey to secure this partnership was both challenging and rewarding.
Jillian: The process to become approved as a rideshare service at the airport was rigorous and took nearly a year. We had to ensure that our systems seamlessly integrated with the airport's infrastructure and diligently followed up on all required paperwork. On September 13, 2023, when the airport officially announced our partnership, it marked a significant milestone not only for HERide but also for our commitment to providing inclusive and secure travel experiences for all passengers.
DeVynne: One of the key challenges we faced was advocating for ourselves to receive directional signage within the airport. After months of persistent advocacy, in February 2024, we successfully secured signage that significantly increased visibility and traffic to the HERide app. This advocacy effort didn't just benefit us; it also paved the way for another emerging rideshare company to receive signage, demonstrating our commitment to opening doors for others in the tech industry.
Jillian: In a tech world where gatekeeping is prevalent, DeVynne and I believe in breaking down barriers and empowering other tech founders, especially those from underrepresented communities.
We are incredibly grateful for our partnership with the airport and excited about the future. Moving forward, we aim to replicate this success in other major cities that share our values of inclusivity and innovation in transportation. This partnership not only strengthens HERide's presence but also inspires us to continue pushing boundaries and creating opportunities for others in the tech particularly the ridesharing industry.
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But what many people may not know is that when they aren’t on set, the pair are together every day, proving that true connection is the real magic. The path wasn’t always easy, but they were both intentional about walking it. Check out this exclusive conversation with xoNecole to find out how a chance encounter, an uncomfortable prank, and two unique perspectives led to a happy marriage.
Let’s start at the beginning. How did you two meet?
Crystal: We have very different answers to that question. I first saw him at a screening where I was supporting fellow actors. But when I first met him in person, I actually walked up to him and introduced myself, told him how great he was at the screening, and gave him my card. But he never called. That was our first physical interaction. It was my way of telling him I thought he was attractive. Also, he was talking to a young lady, and I wasn’t sure what was going on there. They were really close. So I kinda stepped in and was like, ‘Sorry, did I interrupt?’ And once she said no, I just kept talking.
Alfred: Yeah, a lot was going on for me. As she said, we didn’t technically meet the first time, but I remember seeing her, and I loved her green eyes. I remember repeatedly asking my friends, ‘Who is the girl with the green eyes? Then when she came up to me at the actor workshop, I was like, “It’s the girl with the green eyes!’
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Okay, now how did it progress? Did y'all start talking on the phone after that?
Crystal: He never called me. I just kept seeing him randomly. I mean he was everywhere – auditions, a barbecue, everywhere. Long story short: he had a girlfriend. But this particular time I saw him, he was with a group of known actors, and I noticed there was an attraction between him and a beautiful super, talented actress who is a friend of ours, and she was interested in how we knew each other – so I uncomfortably answered, ‘well he’s kinda stalking me.’ I made it so uncomfortable. Then I walked off. I was just trying to block that situation.
Down the line, he messaged me on Facebook, which is interesting because he had my number. But still, nothing really happened. Finally, I saw him on 14th Street in Manhattan one day, tapped him on the shoulder, I said ‘hi,’ and we organized a date.
Alfred: In other words, she sabotaged my situation that I may have had going on. You see how much of a good guy I was? So even though I found her attractive, I had to make sure I was playing my cards right. The barbecue situation was hilarious to me. Everybody else looked shocked, but I loved it. That was the first time I really started to focus on her. I think some people would’ve been offended, but it was such a prank, and I found it cool. I tried to call her over to me that day, but she didn't turn back around (laughs).
What was the first date like? Do you remember anything that stuck out?
Crystal: Well, I was living in Brooklyn at the time, and he was moving to Brooklyn from the Bronx. So we met in Williamsburg at a popular restaurant called Taku Taku, that’s no longer around. I’m very funny about time, and he was over an hour late. I was fuming and wondering if I was being stood up. But he kept answering my texts. By the time he got there, I was MAD.
Alfred: Just to let everyone know, before I was a full-time actor, I was sports director at the YMCA – with all the little children. And there was a random crisis in the building going on. You know I love the kids, so I had to take care of that! To all the guys out there, you gotta know your purpose comes first.
So there was a post-work crisis, late to the date vibe going on. How did the energy change?
Crystal: Well, I liked him, and I knew I really wanted to get to know him. I felt like the chaser. I had been super outspoken and gave him my card. Plus, I feel like everybody gets a pass. So, that was his.
Alfred: I don’t feel like she chased me, but she did let it be known that she was interested. However, my grandmother and my mother raised a southern gentleman, so you know, I had to handle that situation the right way at the time.
But yes, on our date, she was visibly upset at first. I was wondering if I was going to have to go to the bathroom and leave because she was giving me such an attitude. But then she warmed up when I explained what happened. After that, it was a lot of fun. I made her laugh, and it all worked out.
I don’t feel like she chased me, but she did let it be known that she was interested. However, my grandmother and my mother raised a southern gentleman, so you know, I had to handle that situation the right way at the time.
Beautiful. Now, talk to me about the courtship. How did the journey develop?
Crystal: Listen, I had the key in like 30 days.
Alfred: Okay, wait a minute. I have a reputation to protect (laughs). Let me defend myself again. So when I moved to Brooklyn, she, of course, was already familiar with the area and used to ride her bike around there for exercise. And I didn’t want to have her just riding around outside. If something happened, her father was going to look at me. So I gave her the key and said if I wasn’t there, she could still go inside. That was the reason - just being a gentleman (laughs).
So that feels like exclusivity. Did y'all have “the what are we talk,” or did it just happen naturally?
Crystal: No, we never had that conversation. Well, not like “Will you be my boyfriend?” Or “Will you be my girlfriend?” We just knew we were in love with each other. I was in my early twenties, and I remember I asked him if he knew what “143” meant and he said it back (laughs).
Alfred: I had to ask my kids at the YMCA what it meant.
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As things developed, what challenges did you have to overcome together, and how do you think it affected your relationship?
Crystal: I grew up with a lot of siblings - and brothers. So I was very boyish. I was always used to doing certain things myself. And my father raised me to be very independent and to never rely on men for anything. But I had to learn to come back to myself as a woman and realize, hey, you have an actual physical man here. I had to learn to let him lead and guide.
Alfred: So again, I’m an actor, and I was moving to L.A. at the time. L.A. has some beautiful women but I also have a beautiful wife now, right? So the challenge, I think, for us was the things people said, ‘Well, girl, you know, he's going to be out there and it’s not gonna work.’ And I do think temptation plays a real important role in how the relationship is going to unfold. But I just started to live a bicoastal life. I was living in L.A. but spent more time in New York. So that was able to actually help us, and once we got serious - I moved.
Crystal: I have to add to that, I always said I would never do long distance. We really had to decide to make it work. I had a job that was remote so I could travel anywhere. We got to explore L.A. together, and it ended up being a blessing.
Alfred: And it turns out, living in L.A. wasn't for me. So you have to allow yourself room when you're in a relationship, and your partner gives you room to be – because we had an impasse. There was a night where we had a very real conversation about if we were going to break it off. But we decided to give it a shot. I'm of the mind that people make happen whatever they want to make happen. Everything else is an excuse. Distance is an excuse. It's not saying it's not going to be difficult, but anything worth having is worth fighting for. Me knowing what I wanted made it an easy choice.
I have to add to that, I always said I would never do long distance. We really had to decide to make it work. I had a job that was remote so I could travel anywhere. We got to explore L.A. together, and it ended up being a blessing.
What about day-to-day challenges? What do you typically argue about?
Crystal: Alfred grewup with a lot of women in his house, and he grew up in a way that wonderful West Indian women do things. Everything is in a certain place and done a certain way. I didn't necessarily grow up like that, although I do have West Indian roots. So he likes things structured. If anything is not where it needs to be or in the right place, that’s a conversation.
Alfred: Yeah, I'm a traditionalist, and I believe without order, chaos will ensue. I grew up in a household with West Indian women who were married for 50 and 60 years. And as a boy, I would be able to see them give my female cousins and aunts all these instructions about how to treat their husbands like I was at this university of relationships. I know at times I may seem like a very intense person to her, but I feel like I have very unique insight into why a lot of relationships falter. Some of it is systematic, particularly in our community. We just don't have things in order, and we weren't raised to be in successful relationships.
It’s interesting hearing how your backgrounds shaped different aspects of your relationship. I’m curious, what’s a focal shared value?
Alfred: I think one of the things that we’ve shared and actually impressed me a lot about Crystal was her view on family values. Not to be stereotypical, but she’s half Italian and half Jamaican – and both cultures are known to be big on that. Like during Christmas, we shop for everyone, even the little nephews. I’m always like why are we shopping for all these people? But secretly, I really like that because I come from a matriarch where my grandmother made clear that everything was God first and then family immediately after.
Finally, what do you love most about each other?
Crystal: I love how he loves me. But I also love who he is as a man, how structured he is, and how he tells me what’s best for me even when I don’t want to hear it.
Alfred: The reality is that she has the biggest heart that I’ve ever come into contact with in a romantic sense. I can be mad at her, and the second I see her in pain – I go to mush. It’s priceless. I don’t have children yet, but I understand how fathers melt when their little girl’s face melts. Plus, I’m an artist and a bit intense. You know how that goes. We have self-destructive tendencies sometimes. But I can honestly say that whenever you see me, I represent not only myself but my wife, my family, my mother, and my roots.
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The cast was filled with eye-candy like McKinley Freeman, Michael Ealy, and Sean Patrick Thomas (Morris Chestnut was added to season two), and a few love scenes that will make you clutch your pearls. xoNecole had the opportunity to chat with the show’s leading lady, Emayatzy Corinealdi, about what we can expect in season two and how she balances keeping her joyful spirit and body-goals physique.
McKinley Freeman, Emayatzy Corinealdi, and Morris Chestnut
Photo by Robin L Marshall/Getty Images for ESSENCE
xoNecole: First, I have to say I’m a fan of the show and your story. I know how you moved to LA 20 years ago to chase this dream, and that world can be so tough while navigating life and motherhood. So, my first question is, how do you balance it all and maintain your well-being?
Emayatz Corinealdi: Girl, it’s just my faith. It helps me by realizing that I'm not perfect. I can't do it all. I realize it’s okay to make mistakes. Giving myself that grace really helps because I used to feel like I have to keep all of the balls in the air and everything has to be one particular way. Now, I’ve learned that I’m almost dishonoring my faith by believing that everything starts and ends with me, and I can just do the whole thing. I can't - well, I can't without letting it go and letting God. That’s really the key.
xoN: So let’s get into the show. What was it like playing a character that is inspired by a real person (Attorney Shawn Holley from the OJ Simpson trial)?
EM: I've only played an actual person in another film. But this isn't truly her, this is just inspired by Shawn Holley. But at the same time, I still want to represent because she is one of the baddest to ever do it. I have so much respect for her and she’s also an executive producer of the show. I want to make sure that I represent not only her, but all the Black women who are attorneys and work in this field. So in that sense, yes, it's always in the back of my mind.
xoN: Okay, so you know, here at xoNecole, we talk a lot about love and relationships. And Jax was in a very interesting love triangle. But it seems like, ultimately, she chose her safe place. I'm curious, personally, what's your thoughts on passion versus security in relationships?
EM: I really think you could have both. I don't think you need to make a choice in that. Ideally, you want to have a relationship where you’re interested and invested - not just settling for the security of things. That’s the route I suggest - not settling. But people have all kinds of reasons why they do things, so I'm never judging.
Ideally, you want to have a relationship where you’re interested and invested - not just settling for the security of things. That’s the route I suggest - not settling. But people have all kinds of reasons why they do things, so I'm never judging.
xoN: Now, can we talk about one of our favorite MCMs over 40, Morris Chestnut? I heard he’s joining the new season. Can you tell us a little about how your characters will interact?
EM: Well, where we left off on season one, Jax had this traumatic experience, with Damon's character. So now, Jax is trying to pick up the pieces because everything is in a state of disarray. She’s trying to find herself again. She feels like, ‘How did I not see this coming? I'm usually on it. I'm sharp. Why did I allow myself to get into this situation, you know?’
So she's asking all these questions when her friend needs her. But then, probably for the first time, Jax realizes she may not be fully able to do what she needs to. So she reaches out to who can get the job done. And that's where Corey comes in, played by Morris Chestnut.
xoN: Speaking of Jax, I don’t know how she has time but that woman is always running. But obviously, to keep that physique, you must personally have a strict exercise regimen too. Can you share a health and fitness tip for the girlies?
EM: Yes, Jax runs, and she's in shape. But I love to run as well! That was one of my favorite things about the character. There’s a huge hill by my house, and I run it about three or four times a week when I’m able – otherwise, it's one or two. But that's a large part of my mental health as well, just feeling good in my body and keeping that going. And I generally like to work out outside. I'll even take my weights and mats. I don't really like gyms, but outdoor workouts help me keep it together.
xoN: You mentioned mental health, last season touched on so many necessary conversations. Themes like abuse and mental health were addressed. Are there any other heavy themes being explored this season that we should prepare for?
EM: Definitely. Domestic violence is going to be a huge theme. Dealing with Janelle’s character, we're going to find out a lot more details about their marriage and how things played out, and what she was really going through.
xoN: Wow, that can be taxing. I’ll close with this: how do you protect your mental health? Would you mind sharing a key practice?
EM: I generally start every day with a devotional. That helps me set the tone for the day… Outside of that, I just center myself multiple times. Instead of allowing things to get me stressed out, I recoup and take moments back. I’ve found that to be helpful, especially when a lot of things are happening. Nothing will fall apart while you take that one second. And if it does, that's okay. I recommend just giving yourself grace.
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Feature image by Amanda Edwards/Getty Images for SAG-AFTRA Foundation
But the more the discussion progressed, the depth of that answer was revealed. Ebony opened up about how saving during the pandemic, a time when many businesses were forced to close their doors, aided her through difficult chapters. And after our authentic conversation, it made the importance of saving and business research crystal clear. Check out the convo below.
What was your journey like into money management? Have you always been good with your finances?
Yes, I learned it early. My grandparents had a construction company when I was growing up and my grandmother would teach me that with everything they worked for, she’d put 30% away. So no matter how many jobs I’ve had, once I tithed, I’d put up 30% away too. If I couldn’t pay my bills with that remainder, I’d get a second job. As crazy as it sounds, I’ve always been amazing at that.
So you’re definitely more of a saver then a spender, right?
Well, yes, but I do have a shopping addiction. But I save a lot. I’ve gone months and months without buying anything, then I’ll just go buy something big or small. But I’ve always known I still need backup plans. The beauty of having it is that you’re never trying to scramble. Even with my first property, I didn’t have any problems because my money was seasoned. I’ve always been consistent and knew a certain amount of money was going in the bank every paycheck.
Photo by Rari Filmz
Okay, so I can’t ignore the “shopping addiction” comment. Tell me about your splurge
So Louis Vuitton and Chanel are my favorites. Then I’m really big on supporting Black-owned businesses. I put that in my budget every month – sometimes a few times a month.
That’s a good one! What advice do you have for people trying to tighten up their budget?
Prioritize. When the pandemic happened, it gave us all a new outlook on life and what’s important. For example, going out to eat with my friends and family is essential. So I take time out monthly and figure out my expenses. For example, a lot of my friends are Tauruses, so that month, I need to plan extra birthday dinners. It only takes me like an hour, but it makes such a difference. People need to figure out what that looks like for them.
And what is your current final goal? Like, do you have a retirement plan?
Yes, once I get Noveau to 100 million! My biggest goal is for my team members to buy homes and establish themselves. But my end goal would be 15-20 restaurants, with five being investment restaurants. Also, of course, I want properties. I understand the importance of owning land. I think those are the main things.
Okay, so what is the worst piece of business advice you’ve been given?
Someone told me that I don’t need finances to open up a business. People say if you have a 590 credit score you can start it, but why would you do that? I mean you can do it with that score, but the interest looks way different. Build your credit first and avoid the extra costs. I used my own money to start a lot of businesses. Now when I look back I wouldn’t have even done it that way.
How would you have done it?
I would’ve used the bank's money. When you’re building your first location it can be really hard, but they do give them out. But you can’t just come in with a concept with no experience and ask for $100,000. No one will bet on that or believe in it. But if you have a concept, with a real plan and projections, start off with lines of credits. You can start small and build your business with $5,000.
Out of curiosity, what are your thoughts on investing and how do you do it?
I’ve invested in two restaurant concepts. Also, I have my own real estate investment company where we build, sell, and flip. I think investments are important to keep. Some of them require work. Personally, real estate is always key. To me it’s a safe option but they’re smart in general. That’s the only way you get to certain goals. Don’t let money sit in the bank – invest it.
Are there any unhealthy habits you had to unlearn in regards to investing or money management in general?
I had to learn to say no. A lot of times, everybody wants something. It’s hard to say no to people who are capable of doing things for themselves.
Heavy on the “who are capable of doing things for themselves.” What’s been your biggest struggle in building your business? Was there ever a moment you questioned it?
As an entrepreneur, we all have those moments where we’re ready to throw in the towel. But my biggest challenge was building a team and getting the word out there. But I also know God doesn’t make mistakes. At the time, the more I prayed and started to get to know the team, I came to the realization that I needed to let go of almost all of them. It wasn’t just about what was aligned with me and my purpose but also Nouveau.
Also, I had to separate myself and the business because I’m not going to care if they’re late three times in a row but the business will. Those were the most challenging things for me: saying no, building the right team, and separating the business and myself.
God heard every prayer though. Because now the team at Nouveau is amazing. They put all the pieces together. It’s all about praying and taking care of your people.
Finally, what does wealth look like to you?
Making sure my family is good and my mother doesn’t have to work again. Also, wealth is ensuring my team is reaching their goals. I teach my team how to save money, too. It makes no sense that I’m the only one that’s profitable. When I became a millionaire, my goal was to figure out who I’ll make the next millionaire. I want families to understand how we get here and how we stay here. Wealth is not a one-woman show.
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Feature image by Rari Filmz