Most of the energy this month is activated in Scorpio and Sagittarius—two very different zodiac signs but surprisingly symbiotic. The first part of November has us exploring our feels with the Sun and Mercury transiting through the intense water sign often known for being secretive, moody, and even vengeful.
Introspection is encouraged to help you pinpoint the root of any emotional triggers to transform the pain of old grievances. Moving into the latter part of the month, the energy lightens up as we get into Sagittarius season, motivating us to embrace the wisdom gained from our most trying moments and to continue to be a light in the world.
Check out your horoscope below to see what November has in store for you!
Aries
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
November begins with Venus lightening up matters of the heart on the 1st. Fortune favors the bold so don't be afraid to shoot your shot. The Full Moon on the 12th helps you get clear about your worth, making this an opportune time to revise or end any contracts that aren't meeting your expectations. On the 19th, Mars moves into Scorpio encouraging you to find healthy ways to express your anger before it gets the best of you. Mercury goes direct on the 20th which helps you find the right words to express those unprocessed emotions that have been steaming beneath the surface.
On the 22nd, Sagittarius season begins, making you feel more rejuvenated than you have been in the past few months. This is a great time to get your ideas out there along with any educational or written work you want to share. Venus moves into Capricorn on the 26th and love matters get more serious. Career progression is also likely under this influence that is helping you attract more long-term wealth and success. November ends on a high note with a New Moon inviting you to satisfy your wanderlust, get passionate about your spiritual practice, and maybe even share your gems of wisdom with people that could use some motivation.
Taurus
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
The month begins with you focused on gaining a deeper understanding about how you aren't living out your own personal truth which could involve a therapy session or some personal analysis. When it comes to love, you're attracting more inquisitive, "Can I pick your brain?" types that may be a catalyst for you to fully express who you know yourself to be. On the 12th, the Full Moon in your sign marks the big reveal. It's time to show the world what you're made of! Around the 19th, much of your energy shifts to relationships. Be mindful of passive-aggressive tendencies towards your significant other or business connections while Mars transits through Scorpio. Mercury goes direct on the 20th, helping you get in control of your communication and work out any kinks in your close connections.
Sagittarius season officially begins on the 22nd and you're feeling all the more empowered and optimistic about life—the good and especially the bad. Sometimes we have to learn our lessons the hard way and you're open to embracing the past for all that it taught you. On the 25th, Venus moves into Capricorn, attracting travel and even teaching opportunities that allow you to share your wealth of knowledge. The month comes to a close with a New Moon on the 27th, giving you that fresh start that you've been waiting for along with a new lease on life.
Gemini
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
November begins with your attention shifting to relationships and contracts for the majority of the month. With Venus transiting through Sagittarius, it's time to shake up the energy and invite a little more excitement into these areas of your life. On the 12th, the Full Moon in Taurus enhances your intuition and dream world. A longstanding lesson or cycle you've been going through will likely come to completion if you're open to surrendering the outdated for something much better. Mars amps up your energy (and libido), while it transits through Scorpio. This is a good time to get back into the gym or burn off some stress in the bedroom. Whether you're booed up or happily single, prioritizing more pleasure in your daily routine will be beneficial.
On the 20th, Mercury goes direct helping you smooth out any difficulties within the workplace and finally getting your plans back on track. The Sun moves into wild and free Sagittarius on the 22nd. If your relationship feels stale, this is a good time to plan an adventure with bae to shake things up. On the 25th, Venus moves into Capricorn and love matters get hella serious all of a sudden. You may find yourself deepening an existing connection during the next few weeks. Conversations about sharing finances and resources are likely during this time. The month comes to an end with a bold New Moon on the 26th, inviting a more solid relationship or business agreement into the forefront.
Cancer
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
The month begins with love and money on the brain with Venus beginning her transit through Sagittarius on the 1st. A workplace romance may invite some much-needed adventure into your life or even an opportunity to travel on behalf of your employer. The Full Moon on the 12th reveals the true intentions of those in your social circle and may have you reassessing whether some of your connections hold the same weight that they used to. On the 19th, Mars moves into Scorpio, heating up romance and enhancing your creative energy. Remember that playtime isn't just for kids. It's time to prioritize more fun in your life!
After spending a few weeks in retrograde, Mercury goes direct, making this a great time to reveal that project you've been working on behind the scenes. Family planning is also favored at this time. The Sun moves into Sagittarius on the 22nd, bringing your focus to health and wellness. Get back in the gym, try that detox, and don't forget to schedule your annual medical screening. On the 25th, Venus moves into Capricorn and you're getting serious about a commitment. Proposals and wedding bells are in the air. If love matters are kinda dry, this transit could result in a solid business contract or new job coming in for you. November winds down with a New Moon, inviting you to prioritize more of what (and who) you love.
Leo
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
November begins with Venus bringing the heat to matters of romance, fertility, and creativity. Mix all three together and you may have a bun in the oven before the year is over. On the 12th, the Full Moon highlights a professional achievement possibly resulting in a promotion. If you feel like your current career path isn't doing it for you, this could be a time to explore other options. Mars moves into Scorpio on the 19th, giving you the energy you need to get your living arrangements in order for the hibernation season ahead. Some of you may be planning to relocate or renovate your current space. With holiday season approaching, do your best to avoid family drama.
Mercury goes direct on the 20th, helping you to reel it in just before Thanksgiving so you don't drag everyone for filth at the dinner table. On the 22nd, Sagittarius season officially begins which brings your focus to adventure and play. It's time to tend to the desires of your inner-child or spend a little extra time with your own kids to bring more joy into your life. Venus makes her way into Capricorn on the 25th, encouraging you to buckle down and get more organized in the workspace. If you're open to love, you may be attracting someone in a position of authority at the office. The month comes to a close with a vibrant New Moon, inspiring you to dive into that creative project or express yourself more authentically in the world. It's time to let your radiant soul shine brighter than ever before.
Virgo
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
The month begins with Venus moving into Sagittarius on the 1st, making family and home your safe haven. Beautifying your living space for the holidays is favored at this time. On the 12th, the Full Moon is a perfect time to reveal a written or educational project you've been working on behind the scenes. You could also be placed in a position to share your wisdom with those seeking guidance. Mars moves into Scorpio on the 19th, inviting you to find healthy ways to express your anger and any other unresolved emotions brooding beneath the surface. Mercury goes direct the next day, helping you to avoid "foot in the mouth" syndrome as you begin to find your voice to communicate some of your deepest feels.
Sagittarius season officially begins on the 22nd, gifting you with the holiday spirit. There's a lot going on at home during this transit as you get your space ready for entertaining family and friends. On the 25th, Venus moves into Capricorn and you're ready to get serious with someone you've been casually dating. You're also extremely magnetic for financial opportunities that allow you to share your creative side. The month comes to a close with an inspirational New Moon, encouraging you to drop the mask and start showing up as the real you amongst your family. It's up to you to create a new generational cycle that values authenticity and leadership—not just blending in with the crowd.
Libra
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
The month begins with your ruling planet, Venus, helping you attract good fortune and opportunities that allow you to utilize what you've been learning about—whether formally or informally. It's time to put those public speaking, writing, or social media skills to use. If you're open to love, online dating may work in your favor better than usual. On the 12th, the Full Moon liberates you from a hauntingly painful experience that damaged your self-esteem. When it comes finances, you're making a big payoff towards any debt you've incurred.
Feisty Mars moves into Scorpio on the 19th, pushing you to get your money matters in order. Reassess your financial beliefs and practices to overcome hurdles in this area. Mercury goes direct on the 20th, granting you the clarity needed to establish a plan of action towards greater material abundance. On the 22nd, Sagittarius season officially begins and you're in the mood to mingle at the upcoming holiday parties. Venus moves into Capricorn on the 25th, making you the center of attention amongst your family and the perfect host for gatherings at your home. November comes to an exciting close with a New Moon, reminding you to stop with all of the people-pleasing and start owning your truth (whether others like it or not).
Scorpio
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
Your birthday season begins with Venus blessing your finances and self-esteem. This is a perfect time to reassess if you love how you're making money and what financial freedom looks like for you. The Full Moon on the 12th can signify a revelation about a key relationship or business contract that needs some recalibrating or a final ending. On the 19th, Mars moves into your sign, making you a lot more energetic, and moodier, than usual. Find healthy ways to express your anger during this transit. Mercury goes direct the next day, offering you some relief from the muddled thoughts and feelings you've experienced over the past few weeks.
Sagittarius season officially begins on the 22nd, making you more consciously aware of your spending habits. It may be time to reel it in regardless of it being holiday season. You don't have to break the bank to show someone that you care. On the 25th, Venus moves into Capricorn, helping you wield the power of communication and social media. Investing in an online course or school will yield positive results that are preparing you for the opportunities that lie ahead. The month ends on a high note with a New Moon, gifting you some extra income through a new job or hustle. Stop sleeping on your talents and get in your bag!
Sagittarius
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
November begins with Venus moving into your sign, making you even more attractive than usual. Good fortune abounds when the planet of love and money is transiting your sign. The Full Moon on the 12th may mark an ending in the workplace due to a transition into a new role, department, or company. Matters of health and wellness are also highlighted at this time as you're encouraged to resolve some habits that just don't benefit you. On the 19th, Mars moves into Scorpio, making you a lot more likely to pop off. Be mindful of projecting or clinging to unresolved emotions that are subconsciously affecting the way you express anger. Mercury extends its support when it goes direct on the 20th, helping you get clear about the root of your frustrations. Your dreams will provide even deeper insight that can help you let go of lingering resentment towards a person or situation.
Your birthday season officially begins on the 22nd and all eyes are on you. Reinvent yourself. Switch up your hairstyle. Invest in a new wardrobe. It's time to reintroduce the new and improved version of yourself to the world. On the 25th, Venus moves into Capricorn, aligning you with financial support and opportunities that get you paid for doing what you love. If you're open to romance, a more serious prospect may come into the picture. The month ends on a high note with your New Moon, inviting you to set some intentions concerning what you'd like to experience in the year ahead.
Capricorn
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
The month begins with Venus moving into the part of your sky that activates your subconscious and karma. Take some time to reflect on any beliefs or habits that restrict your financial flow and even your ability to receive the love you truly deserve. On the 12th, the Full Moon helps you see through any illusions about someone you've been casually dating. Once Venus moves into your sign later this month, you'll be more interested in taking things to the next level or putting your current prospect on the chopping block. Romance not a priority? Use this energy to wrap up that project to prepare for the big reveal.
On the 19th, Mars moves into Scorpio and much of your energy is exerted towards networking with like-minded folks. This transit can make you more short-tempered than usual, so be patient with your social circle. If you need time alone, communicate this without snapping on anyone. Mercury going direct on the 20th will help you express yourself from a more vulnerable, compassionate space. Sagittarius season officially begins on the 22nd, encouraging you to reflect about the past year while the optimistic New Moon on the 26th invites you to surrender your expectations and trust your vision.
Aquarius
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
On the 1st, Venus moves into the part of your sky that has to do with your social circle and long-term vision for your life. Use this time to re-examine if you're in alignment with your tribe or whether you're just going through the motions with a group just because there's "history". You'll know you're around the right people when the Universe starts opening up to you with new, exciting opportunities for expansion. The Full Moon on the 12th enhances your psychic abilities and dream world, granting you with clarity about the legacy you're building.
On the 19th, Mars moves into Scorpio, making you hyper-focused on your career advancement. Be mindful of power struggles with authority figures around this time. Mercury direct is here to back you up on the 20th reminding you that "it's not what you say but how you say it." The Sun moves into Sagittarius on the 22nd, encouraging you to gather with your friends to take your mind off of the stress. On the 25th, Venus moves into Capricorn helping you attract love and financial support from someone in a position of power. November ends on a high note with a New Moon on the 26th, inviting you to collaborate with those kindred souls destined to assist you in turning your vision into a reality.
Pisces
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
November begins with Venus helping you attract good fortune and admiration in your career endeavors. On the 12th, the Full Moon places the spotlight on your social media and personal brand. People want to hear what you have to say! This is a favorable time to complete that project or educational course you've been working on. Mars, the warrior, moves into Scorpio on the 19th, encouraging you to dive deep into a topic of interest or to share your expertise with others. After spending a few weeks in retrograde, Mercury goes direct on the 20th. It's time to reveal that new blog or book you've been toiling away at. Any travel plans you're making around this time get a bit easier as well.
Sagittarius season officially begins on the 22nd and you're making quite the impression on your manager or an influential person. Developing your leadership abilities is recommended if you want to be more successful in the professional world. On the 25th, Venus moves into Capricorn. Your vibe attracts your tribe. Don't like the people you're surrounded by? Well, change it by recognizing what inner-transformation needs to take place. The month ends on a high note with a New Moon, gifting you with a promotion or recognition for a well-earned achievement.
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Among the many individuals who battle severe asthma, Black women face a unique set of challenges. It's not uncommon for us to go years without a proper diagnosis, and finding the right treatment often requires some trial and error. Thankfully, all hope is not lost for those who may be fighting to get their severe asthma under control. We spoke with Juanita Brown Ingram, Esq. and Jania Watson, two inspiring Black women who have been living with severe asthma and have found strength, resilience, and a sense of purpose in their journeys.
Juanita Brown Ingram, Esq.
Juanita Ingram has a resume that would make anyone’s jaw drop. On top of being recently crowned Mrs. Universe, she’s also an accomplished attorney, filmmaker, and philanthropist. From the outside, it seems there’s nothing this talented woman won’t try, and likely succeed at. In her everyday life, however, Juanita exercises a lot more caution. From a young age, Juanita has struggled with severe asthma. Her symptoms were always exacerbated by common illnesses like a cold or flu. “I've heard these stories of my breathing struggles, but I remember distinctly when I was younger not being able to breathe every time I got a virus,” says Ingram. “I remember missing a lot of school and crying a lot because asthma is painful. I [was taken] to see my doctor often if I got sick with anything so I was hypervigilant as a child, and I still am.”
Today, Juanita says her symptoms are best managed when she’s working closely with her care team, avoiding getting sick and staying ahead of any symptoms. Ingram said she’s been blessed with skilled doctors who are just as vigilant of her symptoms as she is. While competing in the Mrs. Universe competition, Juanita took extra care to stay clear of other competitors to ensure she didn’t catch a cold or virus that would trigger her severe asthma. “I would stand off to the side and sometimes that could be taken as ‘oh, she thinks she's better than everybody else.’ But if I get sick during a pageant, I'm done. I had to compete with that in mind because my sickness doesn't look like everybody else's sickness.”
Even when her symptoms are under control, living with severe asthma still presents challenges. Juanita relies on her strong support system to overcome the hurdles caused by a lack of understanding from the public, “I think that there's a lot of lack of awareness about how serious severe asthma is. I would [also] tell women to advocate and to trust their intuition and not to allow someone to dismiss what you're experiencing.”
Jania Watson
Jania, a content creator from Atlanta, Georgia, has been living with severe asthma for many years. Thanks to early testing by asthma specialists, Jania was diagnosed with severe asthma as a child after experiencing frequent flare-ups and challenges in her day-to-day life. “I specifically remember, I was starting school, and we were moving into a new house. One of the triggers for me and my younger sister at the time were certain types of carpets. We had just moved into this new house and within weeks of us being there, my parents literally had to pay for all new carpet in the house.”
As Jania grew older, she was suffering from fewer flare-ups and thought her asthma was well under control. However, a trip back to her doctor during high school revealed that her severe asthma was affecting her more than she realized. “That was the first time in a long time I had to do a breathing test,” she describes. “The doctor had me take a deep breath in and blow into a machine to test my breathing. They told me to blow as hard as I could. And I was doing it. I was giving everything I got. [My dad and the doctor] were looking at me like ‘girl, stop playing.’ And at that point [it confirmed] I still have severe asthma because I've given it all I got. It doesn't really go away, but I just learned how to help manage it better.”
Jania recognizes that people who aren’t living with asthma, may not understand the disease and mistake it for something less serious. Or there could be others who think their symptoms are minor, and not worth bringing up. So, for Jania, communicating with others about her diagnosis is key. “Having severe asthma [flare-ups] in some cases looks very similar to being out of shape,” she said. “But this is a chronic illness that I was born with. This is just something that I live with that I've been dealing with. And I think it's important for people to know because that determines the next steps. [They might ask] ‘Do you need a bottle of water, or do you need an inhaler? Do you need to take a break, or do we need to take you to the hospital?’ So, I think letting the people around you know what's going on, just in case anything were to happen plays a lot into it as well.”
Like Juanita, Jania’s journey has been marked by ups and downs, but she remains an unwavering advocate for asthma awareness and support within the Black community. She hopes that her story can be an inspiration to other women with asthma who may not yet have their symptoms under control. “There's still life to be lived outside of having severe asthma. It is always going to be there, but it's not meant to stop you from living your life. That’s why learning how to manage it and also having that support system around you, is so important.”
By sharing their journeys, Juanita and Jania hope to encourage others to embrace their conditions, obtain a proper management plan from a doctor or asthma specialist like a pulmonologist or allergist, and contribute to the improvement of asthma awareness and support, not only within the Black community, but for all individuals living with severe asthma.
Read more stories from others like Juanita and Jania on Amgen.com, or visit Uncontrolled Asthma In Black Women | BREAK THE CYCLE to find support and resources.
And so, today, I’ve got six questions that you should ask your man over the next couple of days. Now, I’ll be honest: some of these might be hard to ask simply because the answers might be difficult to hear if they’re the kind that you didn’t expect. Still, I believe that it’s important to close out the year by opening up the floor to hear where your man’s head and heart are as you express your head and heart in return. Because, from both personal experience and observation of others, time is too precious to be out here assuming that what you want is what he wants as well.
If you want to know, you need to ask — and I think you can pretty much get the clarity that you need by asking — asking not berating or pressuring — the following six questions before the ball drops at midnight on January 1, 2024.
1. "Are we on the same page?"
GiphyThe reason I’ve written articles like “6 Signs You’re In A One-Sided Relationship” in times past is because I know what it’s like to be seeing someone and, while I think we’re doing one thing, they are thinking we’re on something completely different. I’ve thought that good sex was establishing a solid connection while the guy saw me as his favorite kind of recreational use. I’ve thought I was officially dating while guys thought they were in situationships with me (and no, those two things ARE NOT the same). I’ve thought that seeing someone for months was ultimately leading towards marriage while the guy was having a good time just…seeing me for months (LOL).
And while it’s easy to demonize those individuals while playing the victim role, the reality is when one assumes, it still can make an ass out of them — and yes, many times, because I wanted something to be a certain way, I assumed that they did too.
And that’s why it’s so important to make sure that you and whoever you’re…whatever-ing with (LOL) is on the same page as you are. I don’t care how long you’ve known him. I don’t care how much the two of you have in common. Don’t fall into the “surely, he must be on what I’m on; how could he not be?” trap because men and women are different. That’s not a flaw on the man’s part; that’s just the way it is.
I could go on and on about this particular question alone yet I think you get my overall point. Before going into 2024, see, not only if you’re on the same page but even in the same kind of book. I would hate for you to see your dynamic as a romance novel while he treats it more like a magazine that he casually thumbs through at the doctor’s office — you know, something to do…for the moment. You’d be amazed how much that happens. Sad yet true.
2. "Do we want the same things?"
GiphyOkay, so say that you both are in agreement that you’re exclusively dating. Thing is, you’ve got marriage in your sights while he doesn’t want to get married. “Now Shellie, why would a man get into a one-on-one situation if marriage wasn’t the ultimate goal?” Yeah, this right here is one of the main reasons why I pitched this article in the first place. A man will date you, even exclusively and seriously, and be fine with that because he may like serious relationships while having no intentions of ever getting married at all (check out “Single-Minded: So, What If You Like Dating But DON’T Desire Marriage?”). I mean, who said that everyone thinks that companionship equates to sharing a home, sharing a name, and sharing a life until death parts them from their partner?
Or what about kids? What if someone has verbalized that they can see making you his wife someday (check out “We Asked 10 Men What Makes A Woman 'Wife Material'”)? Thing is, you are in your 30s and want kids ASAP yet he is on the fence about whether he wants children at all. Listen, I have worked with couples, both as a marriage life coach and a doula, long enough to know that this isn’t something that just “works itself out with time.” Why? Because time is not on a biological clock’s side. The way life — and science — have it, men have damn near forever to figure out what they want to do as far as parenting goes. Us? Yeah, not so much.
Bottom line here, whatever it is that is truly important to you, whatever is pretty much a non-negotiable as far as you are concerned, that is something else that needs to be brought up. Because no matter how much the two of you may love each other, that has little to do with if you want the same things — and in order for a relationship to run smoothly, the latter has to be a part of your relationship’s reality.
3. "Have your needs changed?"
GiphyI have shared in articles before that, one of my favorite quotes as far as relationships are concerned is, “People change and forget to tell each other.” This is a big part of the reason why people end up getting divorced, all the while saying that they feel like strangers to one another. It’s because, NO ONE goes day by day, month by month, year by year, and doesn’t change as a person on some levels. And when you’re evolving with another individual who is doing the same, that’s double the shifting. It takes a lot of patience and grace to go through those transitions smoothly.
Anyway, it’s always a wise move to ask your partner if the same needs they had last year — or hell, even six months ago — are the ones that they have now. And I mean in every department too. What they may have liked sexually may have shifted (as is with you). The ways that they used to like you to express your love for them might be a bit different now (as is with you). The kind of relationship that they were looking for — getting older, their goals, and all kinds of other stuff may have altered that as well (as is with you).
You can’t meet someone’s needs if you don’t know what they are and it’s unrealistic to assume that those needs are always going to be the same — no matter how much you may want them to be (that’s a play on words by design). The best relationships are proactive about making sure that mutual needs are met. Discuss each other’s needs with your man sooner than later. Much sooner if you can.
4. "Is this what you thought it would be?"
GiphyEven though I mostly work with married and engaged couples, I do come across my fair share of people who are just dating too. One couple, in particular, I remember the woman being absolutely heartbroken when her boyfriend of three years told her that he wanted to end the relationship because it wasn’t what he thought it was going to be like. He felt that she wanted to monopolize too much of his time. Not only that but she didn’t get along well with his family and they had two different faith beliefs. Although he went into the relationship thinking that so long as they strongly cared for each other, everything would work itself out — it wasn’t going smoothly and he wanted a relationship that required a lot less…finessing.
Listen, a motto that I have is “better to break up than divorce,” so it’s a good thing that he spoke up before paperwork, kids, and a lot of other stuff got involved. However, that story alone is impactful enough for this question to be mentioned because…you’d be amazed how many people won’t speak up about stuff like this unless they are point-blank asked. ASK.
5. "Are we making each other better? Or...worse?"
GiphyThere are so many words that just get “thrown around” without really appreciating the weight of them. One would be “toxic.” Something that is toxic is something that is basically harmful at a poisonous level. And so, when we use the term “toxic relationship,” one way to qualify if one is or not is if it’s making two people better or worse. Honestly, this can apply to familial dynamics, friendships, co-workers, fellow church members…yeah, it pretty much runs the gamut. Yet since we’re talking about romantic connections here, you definitely should discuss with your partner if the two of you are making each other better or worse as the direct result of intimately interacting with one another.
I actually have a male friend right now who is at this crossroads because he doesn’t feel like he or his fiancé are making each other better. It’s not so much that they are making each other “worse” so much as they are keeping each other stagnant — and that’s not good either. Why? Because if there is anyone who you should be able to say that, as a direct result of them being in your life, you are thriving and flourishing, it needs to be your partner. And if that isn’t the case, no matter how much you care for each other, something isn’t healthy about staying together because life is too short to be “treading water” when you should be moving forward.
- If you’re not emotionally maturing, you’re not getting better.
- If you’re not getting stronger in your sense of self-worth, you’re not getting better.
- If you’re not reaching goals that you have for yourself, even if it’s simply because you’re distracted with trying to maintain the relationship all of the time, you’re not getting better.
- If you feel like you’re sacrificing, to the point of losing, parts of yourself, you’re not getting better.
- If you’re not getting better, you’re not getting better.
Better means “more.” Worse means “less.” If there is more "less" than more "more" when it comes to your relationship with your man…don’t overlook that. The time to talk is now. RIGHT NOW.
6. "How do you want to end next year?"
GiphyOkay, so back to what I just said about the whole treading water thing, I definitely think that you and your partner should reflect over the past 12 months and chat about the strides that were made. Yes, as individuals yet more importantly (as it relates to this article), as a couple. If you can pinpoint clear new milestones that were reached — mazel tov! On the other hand, if nothing has really changed at all…you know what I’m about to say, right?
And no, I’m not saying that folks should expect what I just recently read about Fantasia (did you know that she only knew her husband for three weeks before getting married? Wow.). All I’m saying is that healthy relationships consist of two people who move with intention and when intentions are executed, progress is made.
So, as we close this one out — talk about how things were this time last year and if there are clear signs of growth. Then talk about 3-5 goals that both of you can feel good about setting for the new year so that you can keep improving as a couple. Because it would be sad to spend years with someone and, in the words of Nina from the classic movie Love Jones, all you can look at each other and say is, “All we have are all these years.” Geeze.
_____
An author by the name of Justin Wetch once said, "Love starts as a feeling, but to continue is a choice." And in order to choose to continue, in a mutually beneficial fashion, you both need to know that you want the same things and feel the same way. So, before entering into 2024, please make sure that the both of you do — for both of your sakes. That way, you can move with confidence and clarity…without any type of assumption.
And that’s always the best place, relationally, to be.
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Featured image by Riska/Getty Images
