Relationships can already be a lot of work on their own, but throw money into the mix, and you may have a whole new list of problems if you aren't on top of things. Money is super powerful and has the ability to turn a good thing sour real quick. And it's important that you don't let money come in between you and bae.
There are a number of ways that coins can make an impact on your relationship if you allow them to. Your boo may be hiding money from you or lying to you about the amount of debt that they're in. They might have a spending problem that they keep hidden. Bae may also make major purchases without getting your input first. All of these things lead to there being some trust issues in the relationship.
When things are hidden from one party, it's downright disrespectful, and can really do some damage. It becomes a never-ending cycle of poor communication, arguments, anger, stress, and sometimes even resentment for one another if you're not careful.
It is vitally important that each of you have a good understanding on how having your finances in check can make the difference between a wonderful loving, thriving relationship versus one filled with disappointments and frustrations.
Financial stress can put off wonderful opportunities, such as having relaxing vacations together, qualifying for that first starter home, or causing one partner to become so frustrated that they may walk out on the relationship altogether. Yes, couples have to sit down on the regular and decide where they are going to spend their coins. You have to remember that you two are on the same team and have to operate as such in order to be successful in this area. It is especially necessary to create a budget, and be of like minds where your financial goals are concerned.
The power that comes with being financial independent is the best power that any couple can obtain.
The more financially savvy you become with your money, the better you will feel about yourself, and the relationship that you share with your partner. Life can bring setbacks, such as emergencies, health issues, car problems, etc, and you must prepare for these types of events, which will come with no doubt. This is why you must be absolutely careful to have a savings, coins tucked away for those rainy days. It's so much easier to get through those things together if you both are open and on the same page at all times.
As soon as a couple decides that they want to take it to the next level, you may want to sit down with bae and discuss how do each of you think about money, and have that conversation about the importance of having a plan in place for planning financial independence. This is one area of the relationship where you don't want to be shy about. If bae doesn't want to talk about it, take it as a sign that they either are in denial about their financials or they don't believe it is important. Major red flags there.
Here are 14 important questions that you should ask your partner early in the relationship so that you can get a better understanding of how you should proceed:
- How was money handled in your household as a child?
- What did your parents teach you about money?
- How does spending money make you feel?
- Are you a spender or a saver?
- Do you budget?
- What are some of your financial goals?
- What are some of the issues you've had financially?
- What are some of your biggest frustrations and challenges when it comes to your finances?
- Do you invest? Aggressively or conservatively?
- Are you contributing to a 401(k) or another retirement plan?
- What's the most expensive thing that you've ever purchased?
- How do you feel about giving to charity?
- How are we going to handle our bills?
- Do you believe in having separate or joint accounts?
Let's face it, no one wants to live a life of deprivation, always wondering how you are going to make it from paycheck to paycheck. That's why it's important to learn how to manage your money before entering into a serious relationship. If you are already in a relationship and the financials are looking bleak, then there are a lot of ways you can fix what is broken.
There are many financial counseling companies out there who will do the work for you, or you can gain some discipline and do it on your own. Just know that the moment you begin taking gaining control of your money seriously, that is when you will be met with all kinds of challenges. Just don't let the distractions stop you from achieving your goals.
If you are real serious with bae, and you want to hold it together, then get a grip of your money and do what you need to do to make the relationship thrive.
Featured image by Getty Images
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- How one bad relationship nearly destroyed my finances forever ... ›
- Love and Money: Discussing Finances With Your Romantic Partner ›
- 6 Reasons Money Actually Does Matter In Every Relationship ... ›
- Happy couples: How to avoid money arguments ›
- How credit score can affect your romantic relationship - Chicago ... ›
- Who Says Financial Abuse Has to Be Romantic? 10 Signs You're in ... ›
- Avoid Financial Conflicts in Later Life Relationships | Investopedia ›
Kristin Sutton (aka the Money Therapist) is a personal finance and lifestyle blogger/coach over at DebtFreeBlackGirl.com that empowers young women to take control of their finances by changing the way they think about money. As a licensed therapist, her daily mission is to uncover and eliminate the mental roadblocks that hinder people from living the life of their dreams. You can find her on all things social: @DebtFreeBlkGrl
This article is in partnership with Sensodyne.
Our teeth are connected to so many things - our nutrition, our confidence, and our overall mood. We often take for granted how important healthy teeth are, until issues like tooth sensitivity or gum recession come to remind us. Like most things related to our bodies, prevention is the best medicine. Here are five things you can do immediately to improve your oral hygiene, prevent tooth sensitivity, and avoid dental issues down the road.
1) Go Easy On the Rough Brushing: Brushing your teeth is and always will be priority number one in the oral hygiene department. No surprises there! However, there is such a thing as applying too much pressure when brushing…and that can lead to problems over time. Use a toothbrush with soft bristles and brush in smooth, circular motions. It may seem counterintuitive, but a gentle approach to brushing is the most effective way to clean those pearly whites without wearing away enamel and exposing sensitive areas of the teeth.
2) Use A Desensitizing Toothpaste: As everyone knows, mouth pain can be highly uncomfortable; but tooth sensitivity is a whole different beast. Hot weather favorites like ice cream and popsicles have the ability to trigger tooth sensitivity, which might make you want to stay away from icy foods altogether. But as always, prevention is the best medicine here. Switching to a toothpaste like Sensodyne’s Sensitivity & Gum toothpaste specifically designed for sensitive teeth will help build a protective layer over sensitive areas of the tooth. Over time, those sharp sensations that occur with extremely cold foods will subside, and you’ll be back to treating yourself to your icy faves like this one!
3) Floss, Rinse, Brush. (And In That Order!): Have you ever heard the saying, “It’s not what you do, but how you do it”? Well, the same thing applies to taking care of your teeth. Even if you are flossing and brushing religiously, you could be missing out on some of the benefits simply because you aren’t doing so in the right order. Flossing is best to do before brushing because it removes food particles and plaque from places your toothbrush can’t reach. After a proper flossing sesh, it is important to rinse out your mouth with water after. Finally, you can whip out your toothbrush and get to brushing. Though many of us commonly rinse with water after brushing to remove excess toothpaste, it may not be the best thing for our teeth. That’s because fluoride, the active ingredient in toothpaste that protects your enamel, works best when it gets to sit on the teeth and continue working its magic. Rinsing with water after brushing doesn’t let the toothpaste go to work like it really can. Changing up your order may take some getting used to, but over time, you’ll see the difference.
4) Stay Hydrated: Upping your water supply is a no-fail way to level up your health overall, and your teeth are no exception to this rule. Drinking water not only helps maintain a healthy pH balance in your mouth, but it also washes away residue and acids that can cause enamel erosion. It also helps you steer clear of dry mouth, which is a gateway to bad breath. And who needs that?
5) Show Your Gums Some Love: When it comes to improving your smile, you may be laser-focused on getting your teeth whiter, straighter, and overall healthier. Rightfully so, as these are all attributes of a megawatt smile; but you certainly don’t want to leave gum health out of the equation. If you neglect your gums, you’ll start to notice the effects of plaque buildup, which can irritate the gums and cause gingivitis, the earliest stage of gum disease. Seeing blood while brushing and flossing is a tell-tale sign that your gums are suffering. You may also experience gum recession — a condition where the gum tissue surrounding your teeth pulls back, exposing more of your tooth. Brushing at least twice a day with a gum-protecting toothpaste like Sensodyne Sensitivity and Gum, coupled with regular dentist visits, will keep your gums shining as bright as those pearly whites.
Watching Angela “Blac Chyna” White’s transformation in real-time has truly been a sight to see. It wasn’t that long ago that she announced that she was reversing her cosmetic surgeries in an effort to go back to who she was before the world came to know her as Blac Chyna. In previous interviews, she stated that she was dissolving her facial and lip fillers, removing her breast implants, and getting a butt reduction, as well as removing the dimple piercings that enhanced her fame and controversial tattoos.
In a recent Tamron Hall interview, the mother of two said that she has “fully recovered” from the procedures. She is also celebrating one year of sobriety and opened up about being worried about how her new journey would be received by others.
“I’ve been in the entertainment industry for so long, right, and of course, like, you know, coming out, I’m like young, I’m gonna do wild things as we all have,” she said.
“...I feel like by me being vocal and showing everybody you can change your life and things can get better, like through myself, that right there is an accomplishment, and that’s a part of freedom, too.”
But as she started on her journey, many people have shown her grace, which is something she’s grateful for. “And then the fact that people have been showing me grace, it’s like amazing,” she said. “And I feel like when I did it, I just did it. It was more so like spiritual thing and I feel like people see that, and I’ve always been like my authentic self, so what you see is kinda what you get with me, and that’s just kinda what it is.”
Chyna, who recently received an honorary doctorate from Sacramento Theology Seminary and Bible College, has also repaired her relationship with her mom, Tokyo Toni. The social media celebrity surprised her daughter on the Tamron Hall Show. Prior to the sentimental surprise, Chyna dished on the reconciliation and having a better understanding of her mom.
“I must say, some of the things I have to take accountability for because, like my actions. As a mother, you don’t want to see your daughter doing certain things ‘cause it’s like it doesn’t matter what my past was or what we’re going through, I didn’t raise you that way,” she admitted. “So, it’s like, okay, maybe I was a little bit wrong. Maybe I was acting out a little bit. But I feel like as we grow older, I kinda see more, and I understand more.”
Chyna will be starring in season two of Fox's reality competition show Special Forces: World's Toughest Test.
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Feature image by Kevin Winter/Getty Images