

Have you ever slid into your favorite influencer, industry expert, or entrepreneurs' DM asking to pick their brain over coffee?
Slowing raises a hand.
You may be wondering why you never received a response or why you received a consulting rate sheet as a reply.
From afar, we live vicariously through other people's social feeds, studying the way they move so we can mimic their steps to success, but when hitting the "like" button isn't enough you slide in the DMs to ask if you can “pick their brain."
Nowadays, this question has become a topic of discussion on and offline about the proper ways to set a meeting with someone you admire to get their insight or advice. Many of our favorite women to follow have cried on their Insta Stories or had a long rant on Twitter about the exhaustion that comes with being asked to “pick their brain."
We asked a few women whose inboxes get filled with inquiries to share their feelings on this unpopular question and what advice they give aspiring entrepreneurs, young professionals, and influencers on how to properly reach out for the advice they are looking for.
Chelsea Williams
Her Occupation
Founder & Chief Strategist of ThatsChelsea.com
Location
Washington, D.C.
Pick Your Brain Requests
Chelsea's wellness site has garnered her opportunities to speak on panels and to be booked as talent on television. The busy writer receives around three to four inquiries to “pick her brain" a day and feels that the request needs to be more formal.
How She Responds
“I typically respond explaining why I don't participate in these types of meetings. I then offer to provide a Calendly link that includes my schedule and rates if they want to continue the relationship."
Why She Doesn't Think The Pick Your Brain Approach Works
“It took some of us years and thousands of dollars to acquire this knowledge. This is worth more than the price of a cup of coffee. I have two degrees; I'm certified in my field and pay for continuing education courses throughout the year to maintain my credentials. Employers pay their employees for their time and expertise. Why is that we view entrepreneurs and independent contractors/consultants as unworthy of the same treatment?"
Her Advice
“In my opinion, one of the best ways to approach someone is to be present. Show up to a workshop, conference, or meeting that they are either attending or hosting. Tell them what you have learned thus far from their platform and/or experiences. Ask if they have a consulting fee and let the person decide if they want to turn the relationship into mentorship. I feel more comfortable mentoring someone who has been in my circle, rather than someone who I have never interacted with."
Michiel Perry
Her Occupation
Founder of BlackSouthernBelle.com
Location
Charleston, SC
Pick Your Brain Requests
“For every person who doesn't like the pick your brain email, there is also someone who loves it," the Southern Belle admits.
The former lobbyist left her Corporate America job to start up her website BlackSouthernBelle.com and, in four months, gain $50K worth of sponsorships. Her lifestyle website sent her to London for speaking engagements, as well as public appearances throughout the South.
How She Responds
"The first thing I do is Google their name and then connect on LinkedIn. I try to respond within a week and schedule something over the next 6-8 weeks or ask them to follow up in a few weeks if my schedule is crazy. I find that asking people to follow up in a few weeks is a good way to filter people who are serious about the request or just doing because they are sending out a blast of emails."
Her Advice
“I would tell people who are trying to connect with busy people to try and work with people who fit their personal and professional personality. If you are shy, connect with a mentor who keeps a low key social media profile. If you are the life of the party, send a bold email to a person who fits your style. Picking your brain can work for everyone but it is best when the strategy is targeted to fit your style and the style of the person you are reaching out to."
Marielle Legair
Her Occupation
Personal Brand & Publicity Strategist & Founder of Women Who Influence
Location
New York
Pick Your Brain Requests
The author of upcoming book, The Personal Brand Bible for Ambitious Women moved from her hometown of London to establish her career in the Big Apple. Marielle receives around four to five “pick your brain" questions a month about her career in PR or her move to a new country. “I'm willing to help because I know what it's like when you want to make a big career or life change," she shared.
Why She's Willing to Help
"The question in itself doesn't bother me, but people need to get better at networking. We all need a strong support network and I wouldn't be where I am today without the guidance of mentors. But the key that's all too often overlooked, is to add significant value before even needing to make an ask. That's why I wrote The Personal Brand Bible for Ambitious Women because I've encountered so many women who don't know how to network effectively, which will have an adverse effect on their long-term success."
Her Advice
“Adding value and taking the time to build a rapport before 'needing' something is key. Otherwise, you look like a user. Plus, there are so many alternative ways to fill knowledge gaps before approaching a busy person, such as attending seminars, listening to podcasts, and reading career profiles online. There's nothing more annoying than a random person contacting you to ask a basic question that can just as easily be found online!"
Kandia Johnson
Her Occupation
Communications & Visibility Strategist
Location
New York
Pick Your Brain Requests
As Kandia builds her consulting business and brand that has taken her to Africa to lead workshops and share her expertise, she filters her "pick your brain" requests each month by fielding questions.
How She Responds
“There's a difference between someone looking for free business advice versus the person who needs a mentor or business bestie. At first, I'm leery because many people forget that investing in yourself comes at a cost. To get to any level of success you want, there will always be an investment or sacrifice. You can't go to a therapist for free, you can't grow a six-figure business for free, and you can't join a gym for free—so how bad do you want it?"
Her Advice
“With the power of social media, you can take time to study that person, add value to the relationship and build a relationship them. sometimes you can attract mentors by what you create. For instance, let's say you heard them speak at an event, you could write or vlog about the top 10 things I learned from [he or she]. You could also invite them as a guest on your podcast or to speak about their experiences on your FB live or YouTube show."
Whitney Headen
Her Occupation
Managing partner of 19th & Park Creative Agency & Founder of The Life Currency
Location
New York
Pick Your Brain Requests
Whitney's past experience working for some of today's most popular media brands has made her someone people want to connect with. “It begins with someone saying they admire the work that one of my companies has created and [they] would love to pick my brain about how they can apply some of the same strategies to their businesses or personal brand," she shared.
How She Responds
"I usually always answer with 'I offer 15-minute consultations' and after that, we can discuss the opportunity to join one of the five coaching sessions I conduct per month. If the person is really interested in gaining information, they almost always book the session with me. I feel extremely blessed to be in a position to offer help and expertise to those who don't have the same skills, however, I am consistently protecting my magic to make sure I'm not taken advantage of."
Her Advice
“Approach people for informational interviews and come from a place of wanting to learn and listen versus a place of trying to gain an outcome or a tangible result of the interaction. Also, mentorship has to be an equal exchange, I've never gained a mentor by asking them to mentor me. I've made myself able and opened myself up to learning and absorbing so that the relationship naturally fosters itself."
With the advice from these women you are well on your way to securing a meeting and maybe even a mentor with a woman who inspires you.
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Brittney Oliver is a marketing communications professional from Greater Nashville. Over the past three years, Brittney has built her platform Lemons 2 Lemonade to help Millennials turn life's obstacles around. Her platform is known for its networking mixers, which has brought over 300 NYC young professionals, entrepreneurs, and creatives together to turn life's lemons into lemonade. Brittney is a contributing writer for Fast Company and ESSENCE, among other media outlets.
Your April 2025 Horoscopes Are All About Softening Into Love & Speaking Your Truth
April is a month to slow down and to fully grasp what has been. The month starts in fiery Aries Season, but we are also in the thick of Retrograde Season as we begin the month as well. Thankfully, Mercury finally goes direct on April 7, after being retrograde mid-March, and communication matters are clearing up. This is a month of mental clarity, a fresh start, and not being afraid to dream a little bigger.
On April 12, there is a Full Moon in Libra, and this Full Moon brings relationship and financial matters full circle. This is the time to let go of what doesn’t make you feel balanced or in harmony and to create space for more peace to enter your life. Venus goes direct in Pisces on the same day, after being retrograde since March 1, and love is healing. With Venus now direct, there are more opportunities for commitment and longevity in love, and there is overall a greater feeling of romance, receptivity, and compassion in the air now.
Mercury enters Aries from April 16 until May 10, and what you were trying to see through or understand better while Mercury was retrograde here last month, you are experiencing a breakthrough now. Mercury in Aries is insightful and courageous, and people are more likely to speak their minds and initiate conversation with this energy. Mars then enters Leo from April 18 until June 17, reminding us that sometimes it’s okay to be a little more selfish and to focus on what you need right now. Mars in Leo brings forth confidence, creativity, and passion, and brings an exciting energy to charge of your life and advocate for yourself.
Taurus Season officially begins on April 19, bringing some earth sign energy into the mix, grounding and nurturing what you are creating in your life right now. On April 27, we have a New Moon in Taurus, and this is an abundant and fruitful New Moon. This is one of the best New Moons of the year for you to set your intentions for your financial world and a time for seeing new opportunities for abundance. On the last day of the month, Venus moves into Aries until June 6th, and love requires a little more passion, independence, and excitement during this time.
Overall, April is a month of feeling things through, taking more intuitive risks, investing in yourself, and balancing your needs with the needs of your relationships.
Read for your sun and rising sign below to see what April has in store for you.
ARIES
April is your month to shine, Aries. With the chaos of March now over, you are starting to see the progress of where life is and how everything has turned out even better than you were expecting. The month begins with the Sun in your 1st house of self, and you are feeling more confident, courageous, and in tune with yourself. With a Full Moon in your sister sign on April 12, relationships are also coming full circle for you now, and you are claiming your peace this month.
Mercury finally goes direct on April 7 and then enters your sign from April 16 to May 10, and this is going to clear up any miscommunications that you have been through. With Mercury now in your sign, your conversations are lively, your mind is inspiring, and you are thinking one step ahead. Before the month ends, Venus enters your sign from April 30 to June 6, and love is also moving forward for you now. Overall, this is a month where you are experiencing some happy outcomes and loyal support.
TAURUS
April is a month of passion and purpose, Taurus. You are living in your abundance, and are focused on valuing yourself and the things you are bringing to fruition right now. Venus, your ruling planet, goes direct on March 12 after being retrograde in your financial house since March 1, and you are moving into the month experiencing more opportunities and also feeling more respected in what you are accumulating for yourself and standing your ground on.
Taurus Season officially begins on April 19, and it’s all about you right now. This Taurus Season is smoothing things out for you in love, with new relationship developments unfolding and life flourishing for you. The New Moon this month is in your sign on April 27, it’s time for a new beginning. You are truly embracing your strength in April, making things happen for yourself, and no longer doubting your future and what is possible for you.
GEMINI
This month is all about the options becoming available to you now, Gemini. With your ruling planet Mercury going direct at the beginning of the month on April 7, you no longer feel as held back or out of place as you may have in the past weeks. With Mercury now direct, your thinking is clearer, and you are seeing the opportunities in your career and professional world that you may have missed before.
The more you can embrace your authenticity, the less time you will spend doubting how others perceive you, remember that this month.
On April 12, there is a Full Moon in Libra, highlighting the romance in your life and bringing forth understanding and compassion within your close relationships. You are letting go of old attachments or self-doubts that haven’t been serving your love life, and are growing closer to your own heart in the process. Before April comes to an end, Mars enters your 3rd house of communication, and you are overall leaving the month focused on your progress, your vision, and taking up space because you deserve to.
CANCER
This month is all about balancing your time and energy wisely, Cancer. You are being reminded not to overwork or overwhelm yourself in April, and to focus on doing the things that are within your control right now. The Sun is in your 10th house of career for most of the month so you are feeling really passionate about the things you are developing in your life right now, but it’s all about finding the right balance between your personal goals and your needs in your relationships as well.
The Full Moon in Libra on April 12 will be a time to devote your energy to self-care, close loved ones, and overall getting some time to decompress. You are ready to let go of the things that don’t make you feel safe or nurtured and are receiving an emotional renewal right now. The New Moon in Taurus at the end of the month is a time to focus on your intentions on your community, friendships, and aspirations in life, and to pay attention to where you can create more abundance here.
LEO
Things are turning around for you for the better, Leo. April is a dynamic month, and you are owning your inner alchemist. With a Full Moon in your 3rd house of communication on April 12, you are getting the messages you have been looking for and the mental clarity you have found is bringing closure to some of your close relationships. This month is about being flexible and trusting the changes that are happening for you right now.
On April 18, Mars enters your sign until June 17, and this is huge for you. You began the year with Mars retrograde in your sign, so you are getting the opportunity now, to rewrite some of the things that weren’t working for you at the beginning of the year. You are overcoming previous obstacles, and experiencing a breakthrough in your life this month. Before April ends, there is a New Moon in Taurus, highlighting your career, reputation, and professional life. This is a good New Moon to set your intentions for what goals you want to come to fruition for you now.
VIRGO
This month is all about building new foundations in your life, Virgo. You are feeling more supported and in tune with your own inner needs and interests, and it’s bringing you closer to people and systems that resonate. Your ruling planet Mercury goes direct this month on April 7 after being retrograde for the past few weeks; bringing more clarity, understanding, and compassion to your partnerships in life. You are focused on love this month and are working together with others to make your dreams come true.
Mid-month, Mars moves into your 12th house of closure and endings, and there is a journey of healing that you experience until June 17. You are motivated to understand yourself better and are looking at the past more right now in order to do so. This is a month of recovering and healing from what has been, for new foundations to be built upon. The New Moon on April 27 is a beautiful way to end the month, as you are getting glimpses of a new, abundant, adventure that is ahead of you.
LIBRA
This is a big month of closure for you, Libra. The Sun is in your 7th house of love for most of April, and your heart is in the right place. With Venus, your ruling planet, going direct on April 12 after being retrograde since March 1, you are finally able to take a breath. You are not experiencing as many obstacles when it comes to communication matters and you are feeling like you have the tools you need to move forward right now.
The Full Moon of the month is in your sign on April 12, and you are ready to let go of what isn’t working for you. You have been through a lot recently and have gained the clarity you need to let go of old attachments. Venus moves into your house of love before the month ends, and you are leaving the month feeling more in tune with where things are moving forward for you, rather than what you are leaving behind. Your heart moves through a journey in April, and your emotions are showing you a lot.
SCORPIO
April is a month of success, progress, and dreams coming to fruition, Scorpio. You are focused on your health, your priorities, and creating space for the new beginnings that you are creating in your life right now. The Full Moon mid-month is a big closure moment for you, and you are owning the fact that you have healed and you are no longer the same person you were in the past. This is a month of stepping into your power and feeling supported in doing so.
Mid-month, Mars enters your 10th house of career and public life and you are shining within your purpose. Over the next month and a half, you are going to be gaining some new opportunities that will be serving your professional life and goals. This is the month to show up and to let your skills, talents, and authenticity shine. On April 17, there is a New Moon in your opposite sign, Taurus, and you are leaving the month with some pleasant surprises in store for you in love as well.
SAGITTARIUS
April is a new beginning for you, Sagittarius. You are focused on putting the action and effort behind your goals, and you are being proactive within the opportunities that you are looking for right now. With a Full Moon in your 11th house of aspirations mid-month, you are letting go of the way you thought things would play out for you and are owning a more abundant version of things.
On April 27, there is a New Moon in Taurus, which will be highlighting your health and what your body needs more of right now. This is a New Moon to set your intentions for your everyday life and to create a new, beneficial routine that will make things easier for you at the end of the day. Before the month ends, Venus enters your 9th house of adventure, and you are leaving the month with your sights set high. Travel plans are likely, and this is a good time to create some new plans for yourself.
CAPRICORN
April is about putting one step in front of the other with patience and dedication and trusting the decisions you are making for yourself right now, Capricorn. The Sun is in your 4th house for most of the month, and you are yearning for your safe spaces, comfort foods, and loyal people. Giving yourself more time to decompress, take care of yourself, and ground your energy is essential this month.
Mars enters your 8th house of transformation mid-month and will be fueling your need for some change, excitement, and emotional rejuvenation over the next month and a half. You are entering an impactful moment of the year for you, and you are motivated toward change right now. The New Moon at the end of the month is in a fellow earth sign, highlighting the romantic new beginnings you are entering now. Overall, this month is a process, and you are opening new doors while finding gratitude in what is here for you now.
AQUARIUS
April is about giving yourself time to process, accept, and gain a new perspective, Aquarius. You are being guided towards friendship, connection, and community, and are understanding what may be creating the discord in your life that has been distancing you from that. The Full Moon this month is happening in Libra on April 12, and you are ready to let go of feeling like you have to do it all at once or all alone. This month is a reminder to take your time with all the experiences you want to have, trusting that they will come to fruition for you.
Mars enters your house of love and partnership on April 18, and you enter a passionate and steamy time. Romance is in the air for you as you move through the month, and you are spending more of your time with those who you want to move forward with. Venus also moves into a relationship area of your chart before April ends, and you are surrounded by love and community. Overall, this month is showing you that you are not alone and you don’t have to go through the heavy stuff alone either.
PISCES
This is a month where your heart is shining, and you are feeling in tune with the progress you have made in your life and within your relationships, Pisces. You are owning your value, your worth, and the beauty of who you are, and are ready to leave the past behind. With Mercury and Venus both going direct in Pisces this month after being retrograde in your sign for the past few weeks, you are in a better space than you have been, and there are fewer obstacles and miscommunications in your life.
You have been through a journey of understanding yourself better through your goals, perspectives, and interests, and have been committing yourself to your authenticity. On April 27, there is a New Moon in Taurus happening, and this New Moon is a good time for communication matters, getting your message across, and for your creative pursuits. With the clarity you feel within your mind and heart right now, you are making a lot of progress in April and feeling pleased with where life is headed.
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Swipe Right For Sisterhood: Reginae Carter Talks Teaming Up With BLK To Make Friendships Front & Center
You know the vibes: dating apps aren’t just for finding romance anymore—at least not for Gen Z! As young people continue to redefine connection, BLK, the leading dating app for Black singles, is shaking things up with the launch of Social Mode. The new feature allows users to toggle between dating and platonic connections. Yep, you read that right—friendship is now just as easy to find as love.
To kick off this game-changing launch, BLK teamed up with TV personality and socialite Reginae Carter for the ultimate Girls’ Night In, proving that sisterhood is just as important as romance. The exclusive event was a celebration of the new feature and the power of Black women coming together to uplift one another.
“Your circle is everything,” Reginae shares with a smile, and she’s not wrong. She’s all about creating spaces where we can come together, let our hair down, and vibe with like-minded women. “We deserve spaces to meet, uplift, and vibe with each other. BLK is making that happen,” she adds.
A New Era for Friendships—Social Mode Is Here!
Gen Z is all about building meaningful connections, whether it’s with a date or a new brunch buddy. That’s why Social Mode is such a big deal. Research shows that 65% of Gen Z values friendships just as much as romantic relationships. With BLK’s new feature, users can easily toggle between “Dating” and “Social,” opening up a world of platonic connections—no swiping right required.
Bahja Rodriguez, Reginae Carter, Breaunna Womack, Lourdes Rodriguez and Zonnique Pullins attend OMG Girlz "Make A Scene" Single Release & Video Viewing Party at Trap City Cafe on March 27, 2025 in Atlanta, Georgia
Photo by Prince Williams/WireImage
Reginae Carter Hosts the Ultimate Girls’ Night In—Powered by BLK Social Mode
What better way to show Social Mode in action than with an exclusive Girls’ Night In, hosted by Reginae? The event brought together top influencers, tastemakers, and press for a night of luxury, self-care, and real talk about love, sex, and relationships. From tarot readings to perfume-making and signature cocktails, the evening embodied the “soft life” vibe that many Black women are embracing in 2025—peaceful, intentional, and full of joy.
Guests mingled, laughed, and bonded over the importance of finding a tribe that supports you. It wasn’t just about fun (although there was plenty of that!)—it was about creating a circle of inspiring, strong women. “We need to stick together. We need to be each other’s village,” Reginae says, emphasizing the power of community over competition.
Sisterhood: The Real MVP
For Reginae, it’s all about friendship—and not just the surface-level kind. “We need friends who keep it real with us. The ones who can tell us when we’re right, when we’re wrong, and when we need to calm down,” she says. As someone who navigates the spotlight, she’s got the best of both worlds: friends who understand the grind and those who can give her an honest, grounded perspective.
Her advice for building strong, intentional friendships? “Be confident in yourself and know your worth,” she explains. “Also, hurt people hurt people, so make sure you’re coming from a good place when you’re building relationships. It’s not always about being nice—sometimes it’s about being real.”
Reginae couldn’t have summed it up better: “When you have the right circle, the right tribe, everything just feels easier. And that’s exactly what BLK is giving us—space to connect, laugh, and grow with each other.”
To learn more about BLK’s Social Mode, download or update the BLK app in the App Store or Google Play Store today. Who knows? You might just find your new bestie or your next brunch crew.
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