The Capricorn Woman And Virgo Man Love Compatibility
The Capricorn woman and the Virgo man can form a true, compatible, and secure relationship and friendship. This is a pairing that hits it off right away and there is a certain familiarity to these two earth signs. Both, with their high standards and an even higher need for accomplishments, something is compelling and sexy about an earth sign duo.
Is a Capricorn Woman and a Virgo Man a Good Match?
It all depends on the two lovers at hand, however, as Virgo men, a mutable earth sign, are notorious for their unpredictable ways in love. The Capricorn woman, being a cardinal sign and focused on where things are headed, may feel a bit uneasy in this relationship unless they are being shown real proof of the direction of the connection. Overall, this pairing can either be the perfect match or the perfect storm.
What attracts a Capricorn woman and a Virgo man to each other?
The Capricorn woman forms an almost immediate attraction to the Virgo man. She sees in him someone who is well put-together, thoughtful, and organized, all things she admires in others and tries to uphold herself. The Virgo man sees the Capricorn woman as someone who matches his high, most likely unreachable standards and someone he doesn’t have to hide his needs and wants from.
They are both not overly emotional beings and when they are around people who are so, they tend to feel themselves go in their shells a bit. With this connection, they feel a sense of safety with each other, and they are more open with one another than they may usually be.
There is a certain aura that earth signs carry, and there is an abundance of groundedness within them that is attractive to most, but especially to those who are earth signs as well. They are the sign you can completely chill with and not have to push conversation or activity. Capricorns and Virgos most often meet in familiar places of interest they both commonly share, like a nice restaurant, a park, work, or a bank.
The Capricorn woman and Virgo man have similar values in life and are attracted to each other’s auras, communication style, and sense of self-sufficiency. They don’t feel smothered in this relationship, they feel at home.
What is the relationship like between a Capricorn woman and a Virgo man?
The relationship between a Capricorn woman and a Virgo man is a slow and steady one. They have a lot of priorities in life and will need to make time to keep the connection growing, but at the end of the day, they both want dedicated and loyal love and are willing to put the work in to get there. Since they have such a strong compatibility, it’s easy to adore each other, and they are some of the best supporters of the zodiac.
The Capricorn woman brings out the Virgo man’s fun side. She shows him an aspect of life that is not all work and no play, but rather one that enjoys the successes they have worked so hard for.
Both Capricorn and Virgo tend to keep busy, and this is a couple that has a lot going on at once, as they are both hard workers with a lot of responsibilities and tend to be the go-to in many other people's lives. The good news is that they’ll most likely make a lot of money together, but at what cost? This relationship has all the aspects to quickly become a business partnership rather than a romantic one, and there needs to be a good balance between the personal life and professional one of the relationship to make this work.
What is the sex like between a Capricorn woman and a Virgo man?
The sex life between the Capricorn woman and the Virgo man is one of the best for both of them. Earth signs are naturally more sensual than a lot of the zodiac, and they take this area of their life very seriously. They’ll have fun playing games with each other in the bedroom and will take turns with different dominant and submissive positions. The Virgo man may surprise the Capricorn woman with his knowledge in the bedroom, as this is an area of his life that tends to be a little less restrictive than usual.
He will still definitely be cleaning the room right away after, like the Virgo he is, but this doesn’t go without showing the adventure he brings. The Capricorn woman wants the best of the best and works towards that with any partner or experience that they are in.
What makes a relationship between a Capricorn woman and a Virgo man work?
What makes a relationship between a Capricorn woman and a Virgo man work so well is that they feed good energy into each other’s lives. They are both looking for the same things and don’t force each other to be anything different than they are. They are loyal, secure, and loving, and this pairing often forms a long-life partnership.
Not much can break the attraction and connection that the Capricorn woman and Virgo man create, and that’s a lot to be said. There is a deep trust in this relationship, and the union they form is a significant one.
This couple likes to spend time together, have shared experiences, travel, eat good food, and do things in luxury. This is a partnership that works hard towards their goals together and is willing to make sacrifices when needed. Their values align, and the way they uphold themselves in life aligns as well. Neither is stepping on each other’s toes, and the Capricorn woman and Virgo man have a comfortable relationship.
They have good times and quiet times together and enjoy each other’s company more than anything. This is a relationship that is built from the ground up.
What may cause a Capricorn woman and a Virgo man to break up?
On the surface, everything seems perfect with this pairing and it’s hard to think of what can go wrong right away. However, the deeper this connection goes, they may begin to uncover parts of their partner they didn’t see before, and this can end up being a deal-breaker. For the Capricorn woman, security is everything. The Virgo man feels the same, but he is also willing to take risks and do things differently to create that sense of structure in his life.
The Capricorn woman may need more assurance than the Virgo man is willing to give, yet the Virgo man may need more acceptance from the Capricorn woman. He might find her to be more limiting than his heart can take on.
Both are stubborn individuals as well, and any differences that arise are difficult to smooth out. Even though these two tend to have similar values in life, they also see things very differently on how to get there and what rules they want to live by, and this can disrupt the synergy in the relationship. Not to mention, these two are always working or doing something, and it can be hard to make quality time for the relationship.
Things can go stale pretty quickly here unless they are learning, changing, and growing with each other rather than taking things personally and seeing change as a break in the relationship.
Summary
Overall, this pairing can truly flourish with the right people in it. The Capricorn woman sees so much of what she is looking for in the Virgo man, but can he keep up with all that is asked of him at the end of the day? The Virgo man yearns for an unmatched loyalty, one that the Capricorn woman provides, yet finds himself looking for a way out the second he finds stability.
These two come into each other’s lives to learn from each other, and most importantly to grow. If they can get out of the way of their own blessings and see what’s in front of them, this can be a romance that is an endgame for both of them. There is something special here, and it’s hard to miss.
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- Your Partner's Love Language, According To Their Zodiac Sign ›
- The Best And Worst Traits Of Men To Date By Their Zodiac Sign ›
- Cancer Woman And Virgo Man Love Compatibility ›
Tayler Barakat is a Mystic who has studied Astrology for over a decade. She does intuitive astrology and tarot readings for people all over the world, and her work focuses on healing and empowering individuals. Follow her on Instagram @taylerbarakat_ and check out her website www.listentothevirgo.com.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
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Navigating Dating When Emotionally Unavailable & Detached: My Journey Back To Feeling
The last time I came with a dating story, I told you I got my little feelings hurt in 2021. I called myself trying to be out in these streets entertaining a man in a different area code, city, and state — only for homeboy to play in my damn face. So, I went and gave y’all "8 Rules To Casual Dating Every Woman Should Know This Summer." You’re welcome. Fast forward to 2024, and I am now coming to you from a more mature and intentional place. We’re not in summer yet, but I truly believe what blooms in spring, thrives in summer.
2023 was my year, and it was my turn. I had just completed an 8-month holistic detox. The glow-up was real and well-deserved. The way I have poured into myself is unmatched. Let me tell you, self-love is a love you have never known. After a five-year healing journey, I finally felt like myself again, and I was ready to play. My heart was open, my mind was clear, and my body hella transformed. I had told all my friends that I was ready to explore dating again, and at the height of summer, I did exactly just that.
This time I decided I wanted to take my time. I wanted to date the “right way” or the “healthy way.” You know, keep your options open, ask the right questions, believe actions and not words, observe patterns and pay attention to red, yellow, and green flags. I was never the dating app type of girl. I sincerely miss everything about human connection and dating from 2000 to 2012. Can we please bring all of that back into 2024? I prefer to feel a man’s energy and presence in real-time. Nonetheless, I still chose to dabble with a few dating apps. I was all the way outside and dating for practice.
Unfortunately, with today’s dating culture, social climate, and how some of these men move and/or behave, these dates were a dead end. Not one guy made it to my roster. What these men were was benched this season – not one of them could be my first-round select draft pick. It didn't seem like anyone I met was interested in a serious relationship. And it’s completely fine. Miss me with the ghosting, lack of effort, inconsistency, and poor communication. I continued to just do me because what is for me will not miss me.
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The universe must have heard me talking because I had specifically told my closest girlfriends that I wanted to meet someone who lived in the vicinity, no more than twenty minutes away, and no more long distance. And I did meet him (it’s crazy how I manifest exactly what I want). As we started to get to know each other, I liked his energy and effort. I liked the direction it seemed to be going to the point my girlfriends had to tell me not to run from him. Because every part of me wanted to run from something that seemed normal.
I liked what he was coming with until I became uncomfortable with my own feelings, and I didn’t know how to communicate them to him.
With that said, I knew if I truly wanted to experience the truest of loves, a reciprocal, requited love, and be in a healthy relationship this story had to come to a pause. What I didn’t know was that he was going to show me things I didn’t know I needed to work on. I didn’t know he inadvertently was going to help me continue to heal parts of me that were hidden.
As someone who has learned to self-heal, I am no longer the type that runs from herself. I am here for the growth.
The truth is I am emotionally detached from myself, and I am not actively dating at the moment. I am the one that has to work on herself. My reiki healer called it, too – she told me this year would not be a year for a relationship, but a year of continuous growth. And now I see why. After all the healing work I have done thus far – I am an unemotional mess. How?
At my big age of 39, I struggle to communicate my wants and needs.
I still struggle to communicate and process uncomfortable feelings. I would rather give myself anxiety, act nonchalantly, emotionally react, and choose non-communication when I am bothered with someone than address the issue (I will later explain why). I have been ignoring my feelings for so long it has become a habit, a defense mechanism, and more so a trauma response.
If you are someone like me who grew up in a household that didn’t discuss feelings, your emotional needs were unmet, and you don’t feel safe to share your feelings – emotional detachment is quite common.
Oftentimes, we always talk about men being emotionally unavailable, but what if it’s a woman who is emotionally unavailable or emotionally detached? How does she navigate herself, dating, or being in a relationship? As I navigate my emotions this season, let’s explore what it means to be emotionally detached, the signs of detachment, and how to reconnect with yourself emotionally.
Emotional Unavailability vs. Emotional Detachment
When we look at the terminology emotional unavailability and emotional detachment, one might argue that the two terms are interchangeable and have the same meaning. One could also argue that both terms mean that some people are not in tune with their emotions or lack the emotional capacity to be responsive to someone else’s emotions. Fair enough. However, there is a big difference. The definition of emotional unavailability is described as people who have difficulty with sharing their emotions and being receptive to the emotions of those around them.
According to Verywell Mind, signs of emotional unavailability can look like being distant or cold, lack of closeness, and emotional intimacy in relationships, inability to understand and relate to others’ feelings, defensiveness when asked to change or let others in, tendency to shut down or avoid topics that require emotional openness, or withdrawal from people or situations that provoke emotional reactions.
Whereas emotional detachment is defined as the inability to or willingness to connect with others on an emotional level. Furthermore, Psychology Today states emotional detachment can also mean that people do not engage with their feelings. Exhibit A – me. Emotional detachment has various causes – past neglect, childhood or adult trauma, PTSD, depression, personality disorder, bipolar disorder, substance abuse, or, in some cases, medication (i.e. antidepressants). It is important to note emotional detachment is a complex issue. For someone like me, it’s a coping mechanism.
It is easier for me to ignore uncomfortable feelings to protect myself from stress or getting hurt. Hence, my nonchalant demeanor. It is also true for some people it is a reaction to trauma, abuse, and unprocessed emotions. Exhibit B – me. As it is difficult for me to open up about my feelings at the moment. On the contrary – emotional detachment can be helpful in navigating some situations like listening to people’s opinions and gossip.
Unfortunately, emotional detachment is not a behavior that can be turned on and off at will. Please note that emotional detachment is NOT a mental health diagnosis but can be a symptom of a mental health condition such as an attachment disorder. And if you know anything about attachment theory, it is related to the relationship we develop in our childhood with our primary caregivers.
Signs You're Emotionally Detached
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According to Psychology Today and Verywell Mind, general signs of emotional detachment can look like difficulty showing empathy to others, sharing emotions, committing to a relationship, feeling numb, poor listening skills, lack of self-esteem, preferring to be alone, struggling to feel positive emotions, inability to identify emotions, lack of physical, verbal, or sexual contact and losing touch with people or maintaining connections.
In a romantic relationship, emotional detachment shows up as you or your partner not being available for connection, poor communication, or reduced affection.
For me, my experience with emotional detachment is collective. I am an empath to my core. I don’t have a problem relating to other’s feelings or circumstances. I don’t have commitment issues, nor do I have an issue connecting with others or maintaining those connections. I struggle with sharing emotions, at least the negative ones.
Due to the emotional abuse from my childhood and a toxic relationship, I learned sharing emotions just wasn't the safe thing to do. As a survivor of trauma, I learned to suppress feeling negative emotions in general as a form of protection.
How To Reconnect To Your Emotions When You're Emotionally Unavailable
Serious Kid Cudi GIF by Apple MusicGiphyExploring my emotional side in-depth started late last year simply by noticing my reaction to something that he did. I didn’t know how to properly communicate to him how I was feeling or what he did bothered me in the moment. So, I swallowed my feelings and said absolutely nothing. I intentionally chose to avoid the issue. I chose to rationalize the situation instead of acknowledging that my feelings at the time were valid. I chose to act like everything was all good because it was all good.
“It wasn’t that deep to begin with” is what I told myself. And this is where the problem lies.
The saying is true, “What happens in your childhood shows up in your adult relationships.” I came to realize that because I was not able to express my feelings as a child, I struggled to process them. I either hold back my feelings, take a long time to say how I feel, or don’t say anything at all. This is because I fear people will walk away from me like my mother did if I share what I truly feel. I fear my feelings won’t be validated, or they will be rejected.
With that said, I was completely unaware that I was emotionally detached from myself until recently. So, here we are with this article. It all started by reading Instagram’s @theholisticpsychologist, Dr. Nicole LePera’s newest book How to Be the Love You Seek: Break Cycles, Find Peace, and Heal Your Relationships, which was released on November 28, 2023. As I read through the first chapter, I became triggered.
How Dr. LePera describes her childhood with her parents and experiences with her romantic partners somewhat mirrored my experiences with my own parents and relationships. As Dr. LaPera stated in her book, I have no issue showing up for others or meeting their needs and wants. But when it comes to expressing my own needs and wants – I cannot or I don’t. This is mainly due to my hyper-independence.
At an early age, I learned to show up for myself because the people I trusted to show up for me failed. Given my home environment, I had internalized it is not safe to talk about feelings. I never knew my emotional responses and behavior were abnormal. But because I am willing to continue to do my inner work, I know that I can reconnect to my emotions, and undo four decades of repressed emotions.
If you are someone like me who struggles with emotional connection with yourself and others, here is how you go about it:
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1. Know Your Attachment Style
For me, the first step was to understand my attachment style. I asked my therapist if she could help me identify my attachment style to understand my triggers. She recommended The Attachment Theory Workbook by Annie Chen, LMFT. My therapist administered the associated online quiz – Attachment Quiz. If you haven’t figured out my attachment style yet by reading this article, I have an anxious attachment style.
This means I don’t do well with inconsistent behavior, especially from men (but I’m the type that holds men to standards too). People with an anxious attachment style have a need to feel close to their partner. It may come across as “clingy” or “needy.” However, this same need is often driven by fear of abandonment, mistrust, and low self-esteem. I would say knowing your attachment style is helpful because you can work towards having a secure attachment style (with practice) in your relationships – familial, business, work, platonic, or romantic.
2. Become Self-Aware
Most people who are not in the practice of self-care or self-healing are unaware of their triggers, patterns, and behaviors. We are so caught up in the daily minutiae of life that we forget to pay attention to the most important part of our days — ourselves. As Dr. LePera says, make it a conscious habit to pause throughout your day to check in with yourself. Ask yourself:
- How does my body feel?
- What am I doing right now?
- Am I present?
- Am I distracted and lost with other thoughts?
- What do I think or feel when I recall a specific experience with someone?
- What do I think or worry about?
- What would happen if I shared my authentic thoughts, perspective, feelings right now?”
This is what Dr. LePera refers to as exploring your embodied self or fulfilling your authentic needs in chapter two of her book. Consistent mindfulness and self-awareness are key to self-discovery and in any healing journey. Learning to focus on the present moment also includes paying attention to our emotional response to an event or how we think about emotions in general.
3. Practice Vulnerability
The idea of vulnerability is a tough one for me and so many other women for countless reasons. Whether it be toxic family, friendships, relationships, or trauma – trusting others with your thoughts and feelings is not easy. As much as I am open and transparent, I am not as vulnerable. And I believe there is so much power in the duality to be both. To trust someone, let alone a man with your authentic self is a delicate matter.
But it is emotional vulnerability that allows us humans to build authentic connections, create stronger relationships, and break down emotional walls. Emotional vulnerability is not something to be rushed – it takes time and practice from you and the people you choose to have in your life. Medical News Today suggests that we can learn to be vulnerable by opening up more to our closest friends, building our ability to become more trusting, and developing skills to regulate our emotions.
4. Seek Therapy
I have been in therapy for six years and counting. I would consider therapy one of my safe spaces. I am one of those individuals who recommend therapy to everyone as it has given me the tools and resources I need to navigate my life challenges. By choosing to get help, I was able to put my PTSD and depression in remission for four years now. I have also learned how to manage my anxiety.
I am fully aware that in this season of my life requires me to do the work to unlock new levels of self. And any time where I have consciously chosen growth – the universe or life has not failed me. I was able to heal my body, my heart, and my spirit. Now, it’s time to heal my inner child, this hurt little girl who lives in me.
I will say choosing a therapist is similar to dating; you might go through a few potentials until you find a therapist you connect with. Actually, one of my lifelong friends said to me the other day, “Your relationship with your therapist is one of the most important relationships in your life.” I needed her to say that, and I needed to hear it because it’s true. You are essentially trusting a licensed stranger to help you navigate your life on so many levels.
Be picky and ask the questions. Cut the cord at the first red flag given. Again, let me reiterate that emotional detachment is not a mental health diagnosis. It can be treated with the help of a therapist. Emotional detachment only becomes a problem when it starts to interfere with your daily life. Pay attention to changes in your daily behavior and make decisions to cope accordingly.
I am genuinely excited about reconnecting with my emotions. I want to feel all the feels – good, bad, and indifferent. I want to cry all the tears – especially the sad ones. I want to process and release negative emotions. I want to say how I feel in the moment with no fear.
If you are that girl who struggles with emotional connection or thinks you're emotionally detached, I hope that you become willing to face your inner child and show up for her. Don’t run – she has been waiting for you.
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