Facebook Dating Just Launched In The U.S. & Here's What You Need To Know
What good modern-day love story doesn't begin with a slide in the DMs? In the 99's and 2000's, online dating may have been reserved for thrill-seekers and hopeless romantics, but now, dating apps like Tinder and Bumble have made your local dating pool much more accessible to people from all walks of life.
We've come a long way from the days of eharmony and Black Planet, and recently one social media giant stepped into the romance industry and promises to make finding love easier than ever.
Last year, Tinder had an estimated 3.8 million users worldwide, which indicates that people from all walks of life are looking for love, but have we been swiping in the wrong places? While in the past, we may have been limited to carefully curated profile images and brief bios that are vastly ineffective in giving us the deets on potential suitors, Facebook's new dating feature wants to change that.
For women who, like me, are tired of pulling up at Applebee's hoping the man you met online isn't a catfishing serial killer who came to kidnap you and harvest your organs, Facebook Dating claims to be the answer to your romantic needs in a more personal way. The social media platform's new dating service, which was announced last year, has already been released in Argentina, Canada, Chile, Mexico, Singapore, Thailand, Vietnam, and as of last Thursday, the United States.
While there is no "swipe left, or right" option, people who use apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge will find some similarities that will make Facebook Dating much easier to navigate, but there are a few key differences that differentiate the app from others on the market.
Facebook Dating, unlike other apps, gives users the opportunity to match with other singles based on location, but Facebook activity, like interests, events, and groups and offers a "Secret Crush" feature where you can select up to nine Facebook friends who you have a crush on without them knowing. The service acts as an app within an app that can be accessed in the tabs in your menu bar and has a number of safety features that will protect your privacy at all costs.
Although looking for romance online may be intimidating, Facebook's new feature may be your chance to dip your toe in the digital dating pool. Computer love isn't for everyone, but a lot of people who say that just aren't doing it right. It's reported that today, almost one-third of marrying couples met online, proving that your soulmate may just be swipe away. I can say without shame that pretty much every date I've been on in the past two years has been a result of online dating.
Some were good and most were bad, but there were a number of tips I picked up along the way. While Facebook Dating hasn't launched in every state just yet, I have a few tips and tricks to get you prepared. As a certified single and dedicated swiper, I've compiled a list of digital dating tips that you'll want to carry with you on this new and exciting journey:
Connect On Social Media
This tip will become less and less necessary thanks to Facebook Dating, but nevertheless, it's never a bad idea to get to know someone before you link up, and what better way to do that than lurking on their social media profiles? In my opinion, a person's social media presence can tell you things about them that they won't always verbalize.
Pro-Tip: Don't be weird about it. Be forthcoming about your lurking and allow him that same courtesy. Try to avoid jumping to conclusions before consulting with him about your findings.
Set Deal Breakers
One of the most horrible bosses I've ever had was also one of the wisest business women I've ever met. She told me to "set my non-negotiables", and this advice has proved to be more than effective in my romantic life. "Nah" is a whole sentence and that also has to be your mentality when choosing a potential suitor. Choosing 3-5 non-negotiable deal-breakers is an amazing way to narrow down your matches when seeking Mr. Right (or Mr. Right For Now).
Slow Down, Sis
I know your biological clock is ticking and you don't have time to waste, but when it comes to online dating, rushing things is a surefire way to create a toxic environment in your newfound relationship. Before you consider meeting up with a match, Facetime, talk on the phone, ask a few hard questions, because there's nothing worse than spending an hour alone with someone you have nothing in common with but mutual physical attraction.
Featured image by Giphy.
- Facebook dating service: How it works ›
- Facebook Dating has launched in the United States - The Verge ›
- Facebook Dating will come to the U.S. in 2019 ›
- Facebook Dating's “Secret Crush” feature will probably be chaos - Vox ›
- Facebook Dating opens to friends with Secret Crush | TechCrunch ›
- It's Facebook Official, Dating Is Here | Facebook Newsroom ›
- Facebook Dating Is Rolling Out. Here's How It Differs From Tinder ... ›
Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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How A Stay At Switzerland's Luxurious 7132 Hotel Reminded Me To Live The Life I Deserve
Sometimes, as women—especially as single Black women—we simply need to be reminded that we are deserving of living a life we dream of. Even if that means creating it for ourselves. I recently set out on a weeklong trip to Switzerland, a trip I’ve been wanting to take for years, and near the end of my visit, I had an epiphany.
“DeAnna, this is the life you deserve,” I thought to myself as I took in the gorgeous bathroom in my suite at the famous 7132 Hotel and Thermal Spa. It was one of the most luxurious hotels (and bathrooms) I had ever stayed in—and that’s saying a lot for someone who often travels for work.
To help you better understand why this was such a mental awakening for me, I first need to give a bit of my backstory. I’m in my late thirties. I’m an attorneyand a journalist. I own a home and have traveled the world extensively. Essentially, I’ve done everything in life I set out to do. However, when it comes to dating, I struggle. Not because there is anything wrong with me per se, but because my career and “lifestyle” often create problems in my romantic relationships.
View from my hotel room
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I’ve been told everything from, ‘I can’t continue to date you because you seem to choose your career over wanting to settle down and have kids’ by a man after only the second date to ‘Maybe if you just sat down somewhere for a while, I’d actually wife you’ by someone who has honestly never proven themselves to be the settle down type. And these are only a handful of the things I’ve been told over the years.
It’s been frustrating, to say the least, and there have even been seasons where I purposely dimmed my light in hopes that my career wouldn’t push away potential suitors. I know what you’re thinking, “Girl, why would you even consider that? If they’re for you, it won’t matter what you do.” Hey, don’t judge me, but also, I one hundred percent agree.
My hotel bathroom
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That’s why this recent moment in Switzerland was right on time. When I first walked into the hotel to check in, I was blown away by the surrounding beauty. It was a five-star property with one of the world’s most famous thermal bathhouses. Yet, it was something about seeing that 90% of the hotel’s guests were couples, that forced me to sit back for a bit of introspection—while soaking in the thermal spa, of course.
As I went through the mental conversation, there was a battle of sorts. On one hand, I knew that being able to partake in experiences like the one I was having at that moment was important to me. I knew that, at times I actually love being able to dabble in the finer things—after all, I’ve worked hard to be able to afford them. On the other hand, and sadly, I knew that sometimes being a single Black woman that publicly showcases her “luxurious” habits can intimidate men and even scare them off from pursuing you under the guise of them feeling like they “can’t do anything for you, because you have everything.”
My hotel room
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So, what is a girl to do?
Do I minimize/hide the life and experiences that I have? Do I play down the hard work I’ve put in to get where I am professionally? Or, do I risk being single in exchange for being able to have said life, without backlash?
Luckily, the joy that I felt while being at this property won. There was something about taking a full day to simply pamper myself at the bathhouse and in my in-room steam shower and soaker tub, indulging in cuisine from a 2-star Michelin restaurant and doing all of this while surrounded by an amazing group of Black women that reminded me—this is certainly the life I was meant to live and that I deserve. Even if it means that right now, I’ll just have to provide it for myself until the right partner comes along. And honestly, I’m okay with that.
Restaurant at 7132 hotel
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