November is a month of the scales of karma coming into balance. We are walking toward the end of this year at full speed as an active, expansive, and transformative month is ahead of us. A lot is happening in the stars in November, and many different aspects of life will be influenced by this energy, especially when it comes to your financial and emotional worlds.
Eclipse Season is officially over, but now we enter some significant astrological transits and retrogrades of the year. November is all about finding your balance between the powerful changes occurring and the intentions you are creating. The month begins in Scorpio Season and with a New Moon in Scorpio on November 1. This New Moon is bringing transformations and new beginnings when it comes to intimacy, emotional connections, shared resources, and your financial reality.
This is a good New Moon to set your intentions for the commitments you want to build and sustain over the next month and where in your life you want to feel a renewed sense of empowerment. This New Moon is here to be a catalyst for what is next for you, and this will be an especially transformative time for finances.
Exploring the November Cosmos: Key Transits & Transformations
On November 2, Mercury enters Sagittarius where it will be until January 8, 2025. This is a significant Mercury transit as Mercury will be in this fire sign for a while and will be going retrograde in Sag from Nov. 25 until Dec. 15. Mercury in Sagittarius is bold, outspoken, self-confident, and open-minded. This is an active and, at times, aggressive Mercury sign, and in retrograde, it's best to consider having even more patience with others than usual when it comes to communication matters.
Mercury in Sagittarius acts from thought alone, and while sometimes this can be inspiring, during retrograde, it backfires. This Mercury transit is all about getting inspired, considering all options and solutions, and moving forward intentionally.
Mars enters Leo on November 3, and another significant transit occurs. Mars will be in Leo until Jan. 6, 2025, and will be retrograde from Dec. 6 until Feb. 23, 2025. Mars in Leo is creative, passionate, enlivened, and self-empowered. While Mars is direct in this sign, this is a great time to put yourself out there, honor your skills, talents, and authenticity in life, and do something bold.
Throughout November, Mars will be direct, and this will be the best time within the next few months to advocate for yourself and support your dreams, as once Mars is retrograde, there may be some more obstacles here. Overall, Mars entering Leo in November is the passion and self-love we need to fuel the inspiration and empowerment this Scorpio Season is bringing.
Saturn goes direct in Pisces on Nov. 15 after being retrograde since late June, and we have a Supermoon in Taurus on the same day. Mid-November is bringing in closure, but also the love that comes from healing. Saturn now being direct makes the head and the heart feel a little clearer, and this is also a better time for creativity and inspiration.
With a Full Moon happening on the same day, we are wrapping up a chapter in love as we commit to something deeper right now. With the Sun in Scorpio and the Moon in Taurus, relationship matters are highlighted, and much-needed clarity, forgiveness, and acceptance are here during this time.
Pluto enters Aquarius on Nov. 19 and will remain here until 2043, and we begin a new generation and collective energy. This is one of the most important transits of the year, and its influence will be felt on a larger scale over the years to come.
Pluto in Aquarius brings transformations to the community and the world at large, and there will be a rebirth and a coming together in the world. Pluto, in this air sign, feels empowered to connect and bring greater equality and progress overall. Sagittarius Season begins on Nov. 21, and we end the month ready for some excitement.
This Sag Season is starting slower while Mercury will be retrograde, but there is a sense that there is a lot to look forward to and gratitude to embrace right now.
Read for your sun and rising sign below to see what November has in store for you:
What November 2024 Has In Store For Your Zodiac Sign
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleARIES
November is a month of opportunities for you, Aries. You are being recognized for the work you have done and the skills you have, and this is the time to put your best foot forward. You are claiming your abundance this month, and with a New Moon in your 8th house at the start of November, this is a good time for seeing new beginnings within your financial world, business partnerships, and the commitments you are making in this area of your life.
On Nov. 25, Mercury goes retrograde in Sagittarius, and being retrograde in a fellow fire sign means you are going to be feeling this retrograde a little more so than others.
For you personally, this isn’t the best time for travel matters or for taking any unnecessary risks, and you should focus on going within more over the next few weeks as life adjusts around you. Before November comes to an end, a Supermoon is occurring in another financial area of your life and what you were intending for financially at the beginning of the month is coming full circle for you now in positive ways.
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleTAURUS
You are feeling inspired, passionate, and happy this month, Taurus. This is a beautiful month for you and a time when you are feeling confident about where life is and what is next for you. You are building the magic in your world and the New Moon happening on the first day of the month is when you are recognizing how capable, loved, and supported you are in life. The beginning of November is all about finding your balance and setting your intentions in life and in love.
On Nov. 11, your ruling planet, Venus, enters your 9th house, and this is a great time for you to enjoy a joyful, romantic, and exciting love. You require a little more freedom emotionally this month and you want enough space to be, explore, and learn, and you are having fun doing so. The stars align for you as the month ends, as we have a Supermoon in your sign on Nov. 15.
This Supermoon is the closing of one chapter, and the clarity of another, as you can see yourself and your path forward a little clearer now.
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleGEMINI
November is reminding you to let it go, Gemini. A lot is coming to the forefront of your life this month, and it can feel heavy to address it all at once. The month begins with your ruling planet, Mercury, entering your 7th house of love, and you are thinking a lot about your role in some of the relationships in your life, what makes you feel at peace within them, and where you may be giving more than you have to give.
It’s about asking for what you need right now, as once Mercury goes retrograde at the end of the month, it will feel more difficult to find that understanding here.
A Full Moon is happening in your 12th house of closure, healing, dreams, spirituality, and secrets on Nov. 15, and this Full Moon is bringing up a lot of emotions. This month is about acceptance and not putting things on the backburner anymore, and emotionally, you are clearing out some cobwebs of past experiences and relationships. Overall, there is a lot to work through this month, but you are ready to finally do so and to move forward for good.
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleCANCER
November is about taking care of yourself, your health, and your overall well-being, Cancer. This month is reminding you of the disruptions that can come from overthinking and showing you a way out of some unhealthy attachments or coping mechanisms. You are entering the month with a New Moon in a fellow water sign, and this is a good time for you to think about the things and people who make you happy, how you can honor your passions, creativity, and interests more, and to set your intentions for the love you want surrounding you now.
Venus, the planet of love, enters your 7th house of partnership from Nov. 11 until Dec. 7, and this is bringing a coming together for you romantically. Opportunities in love are presenting themselves, and it’s all about knowing that what you seek is seeking you, too, right now, and not overwhelming yourself or self-sabotaging things here with old insecurities. There is a Supermoon in Taurus before the month ends on Nov. 15, and this is allowing your heart to let go of doubting your dreams and intentions and embracing the magic you bring to the world and others.
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleLEO
November is all about perspective, Leo. This is the month to focus more on gratitude and intention so that you don’t let anything disrupt your peace or happiness. On Nov. 2, Mercury enters your 5th house of romance where it will be into 2025, and there is a lot to think about when it comes to love right now. With the Sun also in your 4th house of home and family for most of this month, your focus is on the love and people around you and how you can feel more supported and uplifted here.
One of the most important transits of the year for you happens at the beginning of November, and that is Mars entering Leo from Nov. 3 until Jan. 6.
Mars in your sign brings extra energy, passion, motivation, and direction in life, and this is going to be a good month for you to get things done, reinvent yourself, and focus on your personal goals and path. You are entering a space in life where you are learning to be a little bit more selfish with your time for your peace of mind and health while also nurturing the relationships you want to continue to build.
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleVIRGO
This month is about using your voice, Virgo. Communication matters hold prominence for you in November, and you are getting your message across right now. With the Sun in your 3rd house of communication for most of the month and a New Moon here on the first day of November, you have a lot of new ideas to gain and perspectives to consider, and you are finding your power within the clarity you are receiving now. You are exuding inner peace and confidence in November, and you are not to be messed with this month, Virgo.
On Nov. 11, Venus enters your 5th house of romance for the next few weeks, and love is flowing through your world in a new and more secure way. You are focused on your passions, happiness, and interests and are looking for new ways to feel more stability and abundance here. Before the month ends, we have a Supermoon in Taurus, and this Full Moon is bringing things full circle for you mentally. You are gaining an inspiration you have forgotten and are embracing honesty, spirituality, and contentment right now.
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleLIBRA
This is a month of focusing on your values and priorities and grounding your energy, Libra. A lot of your energy is going towards your finances in November, as this area of your life is more prominent for you around this time of the year. The New Moon on Nov. 1 is a great time to set your intentions for your financial abundance, create a new income plan, and ask for what you need within financial matters.
This month is reminding you that you are worthy of the things you are asking for and that you don’t have to change who you are to receive them.
Venus enters your 4th house of stability mid-month, and this will help you fully grasp your reality financially and emotionally right now. You are building beauty, peace, and acceptance in your home life, and this is a good time to spruce up the home, create safe spaces, and connect with family or your roots. Mercury goes retrograde before the month ends and will be retrograde in an area of your life that has to do with the mind and communication.
Remember that not everyone is going to understand you or your perspective, but that doesn't mean you don't have the right idea about something.
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleSCORPIO
Scorpio Season is here, and it’s time to bring some more magic into your life, Scorpio. You are thinking clearly and powerfully this month and are connecting with all the right people. With a New Moon in your sign on the first day of November, you are walking into the month feeling an empowerment and renewal that will take you far, and you have all the tools you need to succeed right now. This is your month to move full speed ahead and to remember the power of your voice.
Mid-month, we have a Supermoon in your sister sign Taurus, fueling a new understanding of love. You are seeing gifts and clarity being reflected to you now within your relationships, and some real progress is likely within your one-on-one partnerships overall this month. On Nov. 15, Saturn goes direct in Pisces after being retrograde here for the past five months, and you are ready to experience more bliss when it comes to romance, passions, hobbies, children, and your self-expression.
You have less weight on your shoulders right now, and new paths are opening up for you to embrace and find security in your happiness.
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleSAGITTARIUS
Dreams are coming true for you in November, Sagittarius. This month is an opening for you and a time to set your sights high. The Sun is in your 12th house of closure for most of the month, but the closures you are moving through are closing out chapters that bring you more reward than anything. You get to enjoy the success of your endeavors and are emotionally moving into a space of fulfillment right now.
With Mercury entering your sign as the month begins on Nov. 2 until Jan. 8, your mind is especially active now, and there is a lot to think about and get inspired by.
Sagittarius Season officially begins on Nov. 21, and it’s your time to shine! It’s all about embracing the things that make you unique and allowing love to come to fruition for you through grace and patience. Mercury goes retrograde in your sign from Nov. 25 until Dec. 15, and some old miscommunications or misunderstandings may be coming around for you again to address and heal from as the month ends.
This Mercury retro is about being kinder to yourself and giving yourself and others time most of all.
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleCAPRICORN
November is about choosing your battles wisely, Capricorn. Not everything needs a reaction, and you are recognizing when and where you need to put your energy right now. The New Moon on the first day of the month will be giving you clarity on the friendships and community in your life that need addressing, and this is a good time to set your intentions for your future here and what you want to manifest for yourself in regards to the support and love you receive in your life.
Venus enters your sign from Nov. 11 until Dec. 7, and you are ready to feel the romance you have been seeking as of late. Venus in your sign brings greater love, harmony, and beauty into your life, and your power of attraction is especially strong right now. Self-love is what is holding prominence for you now, as you show others an example of how to treat you by the way you are treating yourself.
Before the month ends, your ruling planet Saturn goes direct in your 3rd house of communication, and you are overcoming and healing from some mental obstacles that may have been playing out these past few months.
AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleAQUARIUS
This month is about moving on and moving forward, Aquarius. You are choosing yourself and your peace as you continue into your dream reality. There is a letting go you are moving through emotionally in November, but this is long overdue as you close out some old chapters in your life. With Venus in your 12th house of endings, closure, secrets, dreams, and healing for most of this month, your heart needs time to process right now. It’s about knowing what you deserve and not settling for anything less.
Saturn, one of your planetary rulers goes direct on the 15th after being retrograde since June, and your finances see a positive turnaround during this time.
Saturn has been helping you build stability financially, but may also have given you some tough lessons in the process. Now that Saturn is direct, you have more opportunities to grow than just dream. Pluto enters your sign on Nov. 19, before the month ends, where it will remain for the next 20 years or so. This is a very significant transit for the world, but for you especially, and you are entering a time of greater empowerment, self-recognition, and support from others.
PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecolePISCES
November is a month of abundance, success, and fulfillment for you, Pisces. You have a lot to look forward to right now, and you are walking through some new doors of opportunities. The New Moon on Nov. 1, is a good time for you to set your intentions for what adventures you want to go on, what you want guidance on, and what new people you want to connect with, as you are in a good space to manifest and to receive some extra good luck right now.
Saturn then goes direct in your sign on Nov. 15, after being retrograde here since June. This is huge news for you and a time for you to fully embrace the power and magic of your existence and build up some new dreams as well. There will be a Supermoon in Taurus that occurs that same day, and you are ready to let go of what doesn't serve you or your mental health and are focused on progress more than loss. You have a lot of good going for you right now, and life is magical for you this month, Pisces.
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Featured image: Kyra Jay for xoNecole
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Kayla Nicole says she wore a dress that was once worn by Braxton herself for the Halloween costume. “It’s not a secret Toni is more on the petite side. I’m obsessed with all 5’2” of her,” she tells xoNecole via email. “But I’m 5’10'' and not missing any meals, honey, so to my surprise, when I got the dress and it actually fit, I knew it was destiny.”
The episode was the perfect way for the multihyphenate to take control of her own narrative. By addressing the viral moment on her own platform, she was able to stir the conversation and keep the focus on her adoration for Braxton, an artist she says she grew up listening to and who still makes her most-played playlist every year. Elsewhere, she likely would’ve received questions about whether or not the costume was a subliminal aimed at her ex-boyfriend and his pop star fiancée. “I think that people will try to project their own narratives, right?” she said, hinting at this in the episode. “But, for me personally – I think it’s very important to say this in this moment – I’m not in the business of tearing other women down. I’m in the business of celebrating them.”
Kayla Nicole is among xoNecole’s It Girl 100 Class of 2025, powered by SheaMoisture, recognized in the Viral Voices category for her work in media and the trends she sets on our timelines, all while prioritizing her own mental and physical health. As she puts it: “Yes, I’m curating conversations on my podcast The Pre-Game, and cultivating community with my wellness brand Tribe Therepē.”
Despite being the frequent topic of conversation online, Kayla Nicole says she’s learning to take advantage of her growing social media platform without becoming consumed by it. “I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out,” she says.
On The Pre-Game, which launched earlier this year, she has positioned herself as listeners “homegirl.” “There’s definitely a delicate dance between being genuine and oversharing, and I’ve had to learn that the hard way. Now I share from a place of reflection, not reaction,” she says. “If it can help someone feel seen or less alone, I’ll talk about it within reason. But I’ve certainly learned to protect parts of my life that I cherish most. I share what serves connection but doesn’t cost me peace.
"I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out."
Credit: Malcolm Roberson
Throughout each episode, she sips a cocktail and addresses trending topics (even when they involve herself). It’s a platform the Pepperdine University alumnus has been preparing to have since she graduated with a degree in broadcast journalism, with a concentration in political science.
“I just knew I was going to end up on a local news network at the head anchor table, breaking high speed chases, and tossing it to the weather girl,” she says. Instead, she ended up working as an assistant at TMZ before covering sports as a freelance reporter. (She’s said she didn’t work for ESPN, despite previous reports saying otherwise.) The Pre-Game combines her love for pop culture and sports in a way that once felt inaccessible to her in traditional media.
She’s not just a podcaster, though. When she’s not behind the mic, taking acting classes or making her New York Fashion Week debut, Kayla Nicole is also busy elevating her wellness brand Tribe Therepē, where she shares her workouts and the workout equipment that helps her look chic while staying fit. She says the brand will add apparel to its line up in early 2026.
“Tribe Therepē has evolved into exactly what I have always envisioned. A community of women who care about being fit not just for the aesthetic, but for their mental and emotional well-being too. It’s grounded. It’s feminine. It’s strong,” she says. “And honestly, it's a reflection of where I am in my life right now. I feel so damn good - mentally, emotionally, and physically. And I am grateful to be in a space where I can pour that love and light back into the community that continues to pour into me.”
Tap into the full It Girl 100 Class of 2025 and meet all the women changing game this year and beyond. See the full list here.
Featured image by Malcolm Roberson
Contentment. By definition, it’s the state of not only being “satisfied with what one is or has” but also “not wanting more or anything else.” And you know what? Although it might not be a popular aspiration of many, it is a sign of spiritual maturity on certain levels. After all, it is the Apostle Paul who once said, “Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content…” (Philippians 4:19 — NKJV).
Being content is about not complaining. Being content is about learning to be comfortable in your present circumstances. Being content is about choosing to find joy and fulfillment, on some level, and in some way, on a daily basis.
Personally, I dig all of this so much because when you have mastered true inner contentment, it creates stability, self-awareness, and a type of resilience that makes you…shoot, powerful beyond measure, if you ask me. Because when someone knows how to “find the good” and “make peace,” regardless of what is going on around them, they truly are unstoppable. Yeah, on so many levels, contentment is the ultimate life hack. It’s something that each and every one of us should aspire to become: completely and genuinely content.
Thanksgiving is basically moments away at this point. In preparation for that time of self-reflection, pour yourself a glass of wine, turn on some soft music, sit on your coach, and then ask yourself, “Am I content?” If you’re not sure (or you need the definition unpacked for you just a bit more), here are seven signs that you may not be…and yet, there is no time like the present to do something about it.
1. You’re Super Impatient
GiphyHonestly, putting another Scripture right here could be all that is needed in order to bring this point to a swift and abrupt end. Which one? I Corinthians 13, the Love Chapter, starts off with “Love is patient” (I Corinthians 13:4). Yeah, if you want to know if you love yourself and love yourself well, how patient are you…including with yourself? Throughout the years, I have shared one of my favorite definitions of "patient" in several different articles: “bearing provocation, annoyance, misfortune, delay, hardship, pain, etc., with fortitude and calm and without complaint, anger, or the like.” For me, it’s a blaring reminder that mastering patience isn’t just about waiting (more on that in a sec); it’s about waiting with grace.
Content people can do this because, on some level, they know how to apply the John Piper quote, "God is always doing 10,000 things in your life, and you may be aware of three of them." Another way of looking at this is people who can wait well — without complaining or getting annoyed by delays or challenges in the meantime — get that in order for things to truly come together, there are lots of moving parts…some that they don’t even know about. And so, if they want the best outcome, yes, waiting well is oftentimes not just involved; it is required.
Impatient people don’t get any of this. That’s why they are so stressed out all of the time.
2. You’re Worried About Things You Can’t Control
GiphyThis. Past. Election. Chile. And then the cabinet that that man is putting together as we speak? I don’t even want to get my blood pressure up, expounding on it. Let me just pivot by adding one more Scripture — because it is beyond fitting: “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” (Matthew 6:34 — NKJV)
Although worrying is something that pretty much everyone does at one point or another, one of my favorite quotes on it is by an American humorist by the name of Erma Bombeck: “Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere.” And really, when you stop to really think about worrying, isn’t that the truth? For one thing, all worrying does, by definition, is cause you to torment yourself by focusing on things that aren’t even going to happen (somewhere between 85-90 percent of the time, in fact; there is actually a science on that) or trying to control things that are beyond your control.
If being a worry wart is your internal struggle, my advice would be to look at life this way: If you’re worried that you’re about to get written up for getting to work late again, leave your house earlier — you can control that. On the other hand, if you’re worried that you’re going to get laid off before the holiday season ends, so long as you’ve been doing your best (which is also something that you can control), please put your energy elsewhere because that is something that you can’t control.
And I promise that when you choose to be calm and confident over worrying yourself to death, that can help you to manage what you can’t control so much easier. Oh, and your health will thank you, too, because worry is attached to things like insomnia, muscle tension, headaches, overeating, and drinking too much. All this over things that probably won’t happen in the first place? Yeah, sis…(choose to) relax.
And by choosing to chill out, there is some contentment that follows because you will see the good as much as, if not more than, the potential bad. Trust me.
3. The Past and/or Future Consume You
GiphyOn the heels of the Scripture that I just provided for the previous point, it also applies to this one. You know, back when I was doing some intentional research on forgiveness, I always appreciated the insight of author Gary Zukav: “Forgiveness is accepting that the past cannot change.” While this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t hold people accountable for what they have done, it does help you to be compassionate with those who are truly sorry (check out “Heads Up: It's NOT An Apology If An Amend Isn't Made”) because, no matter what has transpired between you and them, one thing they can’t do is go back into a time machine and change it.
And you know what? When it comes to the mistakes — or, let’s be real, sometimes they are conscious poor decisions — you have made, you can’t either. So, why let their misdeeds or your own consume you to the point of internally destroying you?
Then there’s the future. What if you get robbed? What if your mom gets cancer? What if your husband files for divorce? Girl, if you are caught up in the future that hasn’t even happened yet, you are definitely gonna drive yourself up the wall! And this is why so many mental health experts and platforms are all about encouraging individuals to live in the moment. You can do this by meditating, taking breaks from social media (and the news), journaling, doing things that you enjoy (instead of waiting to put them off), and resting.
Listen, one of the best things about choosing to only focus on the here and now is you can find little things about it to be content with — and that helps you to be/become more content overall.
4. You Always Think About Wanting More
GiphyAlthough it certainly wasn’t my plan for this piece to be so Scripture-heavy, I’ve got to flow with what immediately comes to mind and, for this point, the verse, “So are the ways of everyone who is greedy for gain; It takes away the life of its owners” (Proverbs 1:19 — NKJV) is it. And just what does it mean to be greedy? A greedy individual isn’t just low-key obsessed with getting and having more — please catch it — they are also quite EAGER.
Eager folks also tend to be impatient. Eager folks are perceived by others as being very intense (and not in a good way). More times than not, eager folks haven’t really mastered how to take a moment to appreciate what they do have because all they care about is what’s next. And when you’re in a state of that kind of, well, anxiety…how could it not affect your quality of life? I mean, really.
And what if you read all of that and said, “I’m not greedy; I’m just ambitious” — listen, there is nothing wrong with having goals and wanting to obtain them. However, an ambitious individual knows how to find balance. If they get a promotion, they will schedule a vacation to celebrate it. If they just got a new car, they are not in a rush to get a new house until they can financially afford it. If they were just proposed to with a really nice ring, they aren’t hounding their new fiancé about setting a date within the next two weeks.
People who always want more, without taking the time to enjoy what they already have, are never going to be content. Why? Because there is always something else that you can want…even if you don’t need it or it really isn’t the time for it. Meanwhile, content people get that it’s a good thing to not go after everything all of the time; that it’s far wiser to embrace what is already before them — because some folks don’t even have…that.
5. You Compare Yourself to Others
GiphySomething that I actually get asked fairly often is, do I feel “some type of way” that I do so much work in the realm of marriage when I’ve never been married myself. The short answer is “absolutely not” because I know that I could’ve been married, a few times over, at this point; however, I am just as intentional about not wanting to be divorced as I am about being in a healthy marriage, not just “a marriage.”
I’m grateful to be in that head and heart space too; otherwise, I would be out here comparing myself to other people — and there is nothing good, healthy, wise, profitable, or beneficial about doing that. In fact, science isn’t a fan of playing the “keeping up with the Joneses” game, either.
According to science, that can ultimately do things like lower your self-esteem, cause you to only see the bad/negative things in your world (in comparison to other people), and it can jack up your perception of what’s really going on with other people. For instance, if you’re 33 and comparing yourself to your friends who are already married and parents, you might want to talk to them about what their day-to-day, beyond their IG posts, is like.
Because while prayerfully, their life is filled with many blessings, if they are being totally honest with you, they will also share that you’ve got some “pros” to your life too (honey, there are some real benefits to being single; check out “If You're Not In Love With Being Single, Ask Yourself These 6 Questions.,” “10 Bona Fide Benefits Of Being Single,” and “10 Words That'll Make You Totally Rethink The Word 'Single'”). Content people get that every season does — because it’s true.
6. You Don’t Verbalize Gratitude Often
GiphyThere is someone in my world who I actually try to avoid as much as possible. It’s not that she’s not smart, and honestly, she’s one of the funniest individuals that I’ve ever known (and I’ve known her for most of my adult life). It’s just that…she is always wanting something, and I find that to make her a very draining individual. Lawd, even as I am typing all of this out, I’m trying to recall a time when I’ve heard her say, “thank you” for something (no joke), let alone express any form of genuine gratitude. She’s just got such a sense of entitlement that whatever she does receive, she thinks she’s owed and what she doesn’t have, she believes that something is wrong if it hasn’t arrived yet. Geeze, what a horrible type of existence.
You don’t have to take my word for it either because there is plenty of data out here to support that people who don’t take the time to be grateful for what they have ended up being unhappy, more stressed out, in more physical pain (yes, literally) and definitely more negative than everyone else — which would explain why people don’t like hanging out with them as much.
So, since this is the time when gratitude is the theme of the season, think about what you are grateful for when it comes to what you’ve accomplished this year, then write it down and post it up somewhere. Then, as far as the individuals, for whom you are grateful for — send them a handwritten note, get them a gift card to their favorite coffee shop, or even just call to tell them.
One of the most beautiful things about being in a state of contentment is it reminds you of a lot of what you already have. It really is enough…for now…in this very moment.
7. Being (and Living) Satisfied Is a Foreign Concept to You
Giphy“Tubi movies” really is a complete sentence. LOL. And yes, sometimes, when I’m taking a writing break, I will check out some of the most…I-wouldn’t-normally ones, just to lend my support. In walks Never Satisfied with its own self-explanatory meaning. Y’all, it really is oh so true that there are folks out here dealing with some unpredictable and sometimes even truly dire consequences — and it’s all because they didn’t know how to sit down somewhere and learn how to be satisfied with the people, places, things, and ideas that they already have.
That said, I am indeed a quotes gal, and one of my favorites on the topic of satisfaction is by actor Christopher Reeve: “Success is finding satisfaction in giving a little more than you take,” and although I don’t do what I’m about to do often (because I try to take Matthew 6:1-4 very literally and seriously), I’m going to illustrate what he said about satisfaction by sharing a recent situation.
This past week, a nurse practitioner (I prefer those to doctors) diagnosed me with wrist tendonitis for the first time in my life. If you knew how many keystrokes that I do a day, you’d probably be shocked that it took this long. Anyway, as I was waiting in line to get a prescription, a young Black man was basically freaking out because his insurance was refusing to cover his own meds. According to what he was telling the pharmacist, he always only pays $5; however, this time, they were charging $62, he simply didn’t have it, and the insurance company was not picking up.
As I watched him shaking and sweating while saying that he really needed it today and fretting while talking to his mom on the phone, I offered to cover it — and after going back and forth with him for about three minutes, I did. In my mind, although I didn’t plan on spending about $85 (total) that day, the little inconvenience that it was costing me was nothing in comparison to how much it was going to benefit him — I could tell from how he and his mother reacted (even the pharmacist mouthed “thank you so much”), and that is what made it money well spent.
To help someone who had no way of helping themselves in the moment? That brought me a lot of satisfaction because it’s nice to lighten someone’s load while leaving it to karma to handle it. ALL OF IT.
And that’s why I thought it was best to wrap all of this up with a reminder that being satisfied is being content. And when you can be so satisfied with your life that you want to help others? That is a level of contentment that is truly unmatched because you start looking for ways to bless others simply so that they can feel just as content as you do.
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Our culture? It really is never satisfied, which explains why a lot of people are so miserable. SMDH. You don’t have to be like the masses, though. This Thanksgiving, please purpose in your mind (and heart) to be(come) more content. It will make you a rare gem that benefits everyone and everything around you.
Including yourself, sis. No doubt about it.
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Originally published on November 28, 2024