The beginning of the month invites us to clean up the messy areas of our lives just in time for the change of seasons. You may be confronted by your own habits and compulsions that contribute to the disarray. With curiosity and compassion, you can create new patterns that are more supportive of your well-being. Restoring balance to your life is the key to experiencing more peace, joy, and satisfaction in your life. For more about your September 2021 horoscopes, check out what's in store for your zodiac sign this month:
Aries
AriesLaci Jordan for xoNecoleThe month begins with a New Moon on the 6th inviting you to commit to a new routine that will support a better work-life balance. On the 10th, Venus enters Scorpio helping you attract support from an unexpected resource. You'd be surprised by who's been watching you put in all of that hard work. When Mars shifts into Libra on the 14th, be mindful of how you approach your relationships. Partnerships can be tested during this time if you're not considerate of the other person's needs.
Compromise isn't such a bad thing when everyone gets to win, Aries.
The Full Moon on the 20th is the perfect time to wrap up karmic cycles that are holding you back from reaching the next level in life. Cut out the dead weight and be open to the new experiences that await. On the 22nd, the Sun enters Libra, making this a good time to adjust your boundaries where necessary and to renegotiate any contracts that aren't suiting your needs. If you're getting into any new contracts, try to do so before Mercury goes Retrograde on the 27th.
Taurus
TaurusLaci Jordan for xoNecoleA harmonious New Moon on the 6th gets September started off on the right foot for you, Taurus. Make some time for pleasure, romance, and play as much as you make time for achieving your goals. On the 10th, Venus enters Scorpio, helping you get a little closer to others.
Let your guards down and allow those closest to you to experience your tenderness.
When Mars enters Libra on the 14th, you're motivated to create more balance in your daily routine and physical body. The Full Moon on the 20th illuminates the intentions of those around you, helping you to clarify who you need to keep close and who should be loved from a distance. When the Sun shifts into Libra on the 22nd, consider practices that can benefit your mental and physical wellness--such as breath work, meditation, yoga, or spending a little more time in nature. On the 27th, Mercury goes Retrograde which could invite you to revisit a health regimen or routine that you've benefited from previously.
Gemini
GeminiLaci Jordan for xoNecoleThe New moon on the 6th brings your attention to matters of family and home, Gemini. Be mindful of tension arising due to a lack of balance between household responsibilities and work. On the 10th, Venus enters Scorpio which could have you garnering the attention of some hidden enemies that don't enjoy seeing how successful you've been in the workplace. Protect your energy with prayer, spiritual baths, or some Black Obsidian to ward off the evil eye. When Mars enters Libra on the 14th, it's time to have some fun! You've been all work and no play.
Be more intentional about doing something for pleasure.
The Full Moon on the 20th is challenging you to find the balance between you-time, your career goals, and the needs of your family. You can't fill anyone from an empty cup so don't feel guilty for taking a step back from all of your various responsibilities--even if just for a day. On the 22nd, the Sun shifts into Libra revitalizing your inner child and your desire to create. Go to an art museum, write a song, hit up Hobby Lobby--do all of the things that your creative genius needs to feel life isn't just about adulting. On the 27th, your ruling planet, Mercury, goes Retrograde, making this a good time to tie up loose ends on a project you've been procrastinating on.
Cancer
CancerLaci Jordan for xoNecoleThe month begins with a harmonious New Moon on the 6th encouraging you to be a little kinder to yourself, Cancer. Oftentimes, we're our own worst critic. Seek to see yourself through the eyes of the person who loves you most. On the 10th, Venus enters Scorpio inviting you to open up to the creative and sexual healing available to you through self-pleasure or an intimate connection with another soul. When Mars enters Libra, you could find yourself in the midst of some family drama with you being chosen as the mediator (what's new?).
Protect your peace and allow other people to fight their own battles.
The Full Moon on the 20th sets you up for a spiritually transcendental experience that reminds you of just how limitless, powerful, and magical you truly are. On the 22nd, the Sun shifts into Libra encouraging you to get your home prepared for the change of seasons on the horizon. Decorating your space for Spooky Season can be just what you need to help you feel more grounded. On the 27th, Mercury goes Retrograde making this a good time to revisit plans about relocating, buying/selling a home, and family planning.
Leo
LeoLaci Jordan for xoNecoleThe month kicks off with a New Moon on the 6th inviting you to get serious about your finances. After a lavish birthday season, it's time to reel in the spending and get yourself back on a budget, Leo. Consider new ways of expanding your income to support the extravagant lifestyle you want to live. On the 10th, Venus enters Scorpio which has you feeling stretched thin between your family's expectations and what you want for yourself.
When Mars enters Libra on the 14th, you're feeling extra spicy so you shouldn't have a hard time speaking up for your needs and asserting your boundaries.
The Full Moon on the 20th can be an emotional time for you. Stock up on plenty of Kleenex and red wine to see you through it. On the 22nd, the Sun enters Libra, making this a good time to hit the books or scour the internet for information on a hobby or project that you want to perfect. Try not to overdo it on the caffeine. Your thirst for knowledge needs to be balanced with time to eat and rest as well. On the 27th, Mercury goes Retrograde which could have you revisiting an old conversation or tying up loose ends on a project.
Virgo
VirgoLaci Jordan for xoNecoleSeptember kicks off with a New Moon in your sign on the 6th inviting you to make a wish for what you want to manifest in this next year. Dream big and watch how the Universe matches your energy in magical ways. On the 10th, Venus enters Scorpio drawing lots of attention your way. Intense connections can form during this transit that help you and others feel seen on a much deeper level, Virgo.
When Mars enters Libra on the 14th, you're focused on solidifying new contracts that will ultimately increase your earning potential.
The Full Moon on the 20th can result in the end of a contract with a client, employer, or partnership but trust that this only creates space for an opportunity or person that is more in alignment with you. On the 22nd, the Sun enters Libra which is revitalizing your self-esteem and reinforcing just how amazing you are. A readjustment of your personal, and financial, boundaries may be necessary in response to this growing recognition of your value. On the 27th, Mercury goes Retrograde so be prepared to revisit some existing agreements and to renegotiate a contract. It's important that you get everything on the table so everything can move forward seamlessly once Mercury goes direct next month.
Libra
LibraLaci Jordan for xoNecoleThe month begins with a New Moon inviting you to cut out anything that is draining your life force so you can enter into your new year feeling light and refreshed. On the 10th, Venus enters Scorpio, encouraging you to redefine your relationship values. If your connections have been a little too surface level, you could be craving something deeper. Look within yourself to see how you've been reinforcing relationships that don't provide you with the intimacy you need. On the 14th, Mars shifts into your sign which makes it easier for you to assert yourself and your boundaries.
It's time to take ownership of the world that you are weaving, Libra.
The Full Moon on the 20th is a good time to detox from anything (and anyone) that is weighing you down. Striking a balance between your need for self-care and your responsibilities comes into focus during this time. Your birthday season officially begins when the Sun shifts into your sign on the 22nd, providing you with a much-needed boost of energy. When Mercury goes Retrograde on the 27th, life slows down for the next few weeks giving you a chance to reflect on recent changes and decisions you've made to wrap up certain cycles in your life.
Scorpio
ScorpioLaci Jordan for xoNecoleThe New Moon on the 6th invites you to expand your social network, Scorpio. Get outside of your comfort zone and meet some new people that inspire you to grow. On the 10th, Venus enters your sign, making you a magnet for good fortune, divine opportunities, and a whole lot of love. Open your heart to receive all of the blessings available to you. When Mars shifts into Libra on the 14th, your energy levels may be waning.
Get plenty of rest during this transit and be mindful of repressed anger that has more of a tendency to pop out when you're not taking good care of yourself.
The Full Moon on the 20th is a supportive time for revealing a creative project or indulging in some pleasure. Romance is in the air, making this the perfect date night. On the 22nd, the Sun joins Mars which is kicking up the aggression (and possibly some violent dreams). Take note of what your subconscious may be trying to communicate to you. Energy leaks will become all the more apparent during this transit, especially when Mercury goes Retrograde on the 27th. Given the more introspective nature of this transit, you'll be able to gain more clarity into the root of any anger, resentment, or depletion.
Sagittarius
SagittariusLaci Jordan for xoNecoleThe beginning of the month brings your attention to your career goals, which may be shifting with this New Moon on the 6th. As much as it's nice to make money, you may find yourself considering how you can be of service to others through the work that you offer to the world. On the 10th, Venus enters Scorpio which could have you attracting some intense connections that may be borderline toxic. You can't save everybody (or really anyone for that matter).
The S on your chest doesn't stand for "Superwoman"--it stands for Sagittarius. Let people handle their own problems.
On the 14th, Mars shifts into Libra bringing your focus to your friendships. Any imbalances will be harder to ignore which could have you pulling back or seeking connection elsewhere. The Full Moon on the 20th gives you an opportunity to make peace with your more vulnerable side that may not have been nurtured in your childhood. On the 22nd, the Sun shifts into Libra, motivating you to collaborate with like-minded people that can help you bring your vision into reality. The month wraps up with Mercury going Retrograde, giving you a chance to breathe new life into an old dream.
Capricorn
CapricornLaci Jordan for xoNecoleSeptember begins on an optimistic note with you looking to expand your horizons around the New Moon on the 6th. Going back to school, committing to a new spiritual practice, or traveling overseas may be on your to-do list. On the 10th, Venus enters Scorpio which helps you deepen your connections with your friends, Capricorn. Be mindful of possessive and controlling energies that can put a damper on the good vibes. When Mars shifts into Libra on the 14th, you're feeling the pressure to make some major boss moves.
Securing contracts, sponsorships, and other partnerships will be a key to your success.
The Full Moon on the 20th heightens your ability to communicate with the spiritual realm. Pay close attention to your dreams. Your ancestors and guides have something they want to communicate to you (and possibly through you). When the Sun shifts into Libra on the 22nd, your motivation to build your legacy needs to be tempered if someone else is involved. You could be coming off even more bossy than usual. Everyone moves at a different pace. Try to lead by example, not by force. On the 27th, Mercury goes Retrograde, giving you a chance to revise any existing contracts and agreements. Read the fine print before getting into any new partnerships during the Retrograde.
Aquarius
AquariusLaci Jordan for xoNecoleThe beginning of the month is a bit more introspective for you with the New Moon on the 6th, Aquarius. Spend some time in self-reflection by journaling or catching up with your therapist. On the 10th, Venus enters Scorpio which supports you in conquering your to-do list regarding your career goals. As distracting as the energies may be around you, you're locked into achieving your goals and putting the rest of the world on pause for a bit.
When Mars shifts into Libra on 14th, your wanderlust is gnawing at you to take a break--at least for a pre-Mercury Retrograde vacation.
The Full Moon on the 20th provides you with some miraculous financial breakthroughs that you've been praying for. Treat this blessing as the gift that it is before you go on a shopping spree. Save some money and pay off some of your debt first. On the 22nd, the Sun shifts into Libra, making this a good time to go back to school, sign up for a workshop, or reconnect with your spiritual practice. The month wraps up with Mercury going Retrograde on the 27th, giving you a chance to revisit a former practice or study that brought balance to your life.
Pisces
PiscesLaci Jordan for xoNecoleThe month begins with a New Moon on the 6th encouraging you to (re)establish your boundaries based upon your changing needs and desires. Understand that your boundaries are just as fluid as you are and will routinely need to be communicated to those around you, Pisces. On the 10th, Venus enters Scorpio helping you dive deeper into your spiritual studies and practices. This is an extremely regenerative time for you requiring solitude for you to fully tap into the benefits. When Mars shifts into Libra on the 14th, you're diving deep to explore the root of any imbalances in your life--particularly within your relationships.
Any repetitive patterns and lessons you're experiencing may need another unbiased perspective. Talking through it with a therapist can glean insight into your blindspots.
The Full Moon on the 20th takes place in your sign, liberating you from the confines of expectations from others. It's time to take back control of your life by letting go of the unnecessary stress and pressure that comes with trying to make everyone happy. That's not your job. Happiness is an inside job. Hand that responsibility back over to who it belongs to. The Sun shifts into Libra on the 22nd, helping you strike a balance within any financial partnerships you're a part of. Keep a close eye on your budget and spending habits to become more fiscally responsible. The month wraps up with Mercury going Retrograde, helping you clear out some karma regarding intimacy and connection to others.
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While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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I’m not saying that your vagina doesn’t like it. I’m simply saying that it goes through a lot during those moments of copulation — and sometimes, it’s without the pre- (check out “15 Pre-Sex Rituals That Could Make Sex A LOT More Pleasurable”) and post-care that it not only needs but truly deserves.
So, in honor of all that our vagina’s go through during coitus, I wanted to shout out four things that you should do for “her” before you have sex and four other things that you should do once the get down is over — things that will make her (and ultimately you) feel so much better about what transpires…during.
Before Sex Tip #1: Your Vagina Wishes You Wouldn’t Shave
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My waxer and I are going to come to low-key blows in a minute if she doesn’t keep trying to take more and more hair away from my pubic mound. LOL. Me? I’m someone who likes my bikini line to be cleaned up; however, I prefer to not go completely bald. If you’re someone who is on the fence, something that may sway you over to my side of things is the fact that there is plenty of data out here that says pubic hair can help to decrease your chances of contracting an STI/STD.
One reason is that hair (everywhere) helps to protect you. Another is because, if you happen to shave or wax and then have sex 12-24 hours later, and your partner does have an STI/STD, there could be mild abrasions or cuts that could make it easier for what they have to be transmitted to you.
Listen, I’m all about a well-manicured treasure box happening — just make sure that you “handle that” a couple of days before sex…not mere hours before.
Before Sex Tip #2: Your Vagina Wishes You Wouldn’t Avoid Washing Your Hands
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It’s kind of hard to have sex without using your hands. That said, if fingers are gonna be all up and around “her,” they need to be as clean as possible, so that bacteria doesn’t end up pissing her off. This means that if your nails are long, you need to use a nail brush to dig up underneath them. This means that if he goes to the bathroom right before coming into the bedroom, he should wash his hands.
This also means that if you like to be on the adventurous side and bring “sex condiments” into the picture during foreplay (check out “12 'Sex Condiments' That Can Make Coitus Even More...Delicious”), and there is stuff all over your fingers, hands should be washed then too. The main reason for the last one is food has a way of throwing off your vagina’s pH balance — and, whenever that happens, it can lead to an infection. And who the hell wants that, chile?
Before Sex Tip #3: Your Vagina Wishes You Wouldn’t Drink Too Much
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When you get a chance, do your vagina a favor and check out “Turns Out Sober Sex Might Be The Underrated Secret To Better Orgasms.” When you’ve got too much alcohol in your system, not only could it potentially cloud your judgment, but it can also tank your libido, decrease how much natural lubricant your body produces, and it can make it harder for you to climax as well.
As far as the lube part goes, the issue with that is alcohol dehydrates you, and let me tell you, there are few things worse than trying to have great sex with a dry va-jay-jay. All of that friction damn near feels like broken glass (not exactly but…close). Ugh. So, a glass of wine or a shot of Casamigos? Cool. Throwin’ back an entire bottle? Yeah, let’s not.
Before Sex Tip #4: Your Vagina Wishes You Wouldn’t "Forget" to Use Condoms
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If you want to significantly decrease your chances of experiencing an unwanted pregnancy or an STI/STD, you need to use a condom — not sometimes, not partly during sex…each and every time and from start to finish when it comes to copulation. To this day, when used flawlessly, condoms continue to be 98 percent effective (around 87 percent effective otherwise). Not only that but if you are having sex with a new partner for the first time, his sperm/semen has the potential to throw your vagina’s pH off and that could lead to itchiness, irritation and/or some type of infection.
Look, I don’t know one person on this planet who thinks that wearing a condom feels better than “going raw.” Still, unless you want to get pregnant or you want to do a crap shoot with your health (at a time when STIs/STDs are on the rise, by the way), do you and your vagina a favor and bring condoms into the mix. Speaking of condoms (and your vagina), check out “These Are The Kinds Of Condoms Your Vagina Would Actually Prefer,” so that using them can be as pleasant of an experience as possible.
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After Sex Tip #1: Your Vagina Wishes You Wouldn’t “Mingle” with Sex Toys
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Okay, so when it comes to “after sex,” I think that pretty much all of us can vouch for the fact that sometimes sex doesn’t stop so much as it…pauses. And during that refractory period, it can be common for one or both partners to do things that will help to keep the juices flowing (umm, so to speak). Thing is, if your sex toys have been moving around from place to place, this means that bacteria, fungi, or even viruses can be transmitted.
So, after the first sex romp, please wash your sex toys before inserting them, umm, elsewhere. Then, once you’re completely done, thoroughly clean and dry them and put them away. For tips on how to do this, based on the material that they are made out of, check out Self’s “How to Clean Your Sex Toys So You Can Use Them Safely.”
After Sex Tip #2: Your Vagina Wishes You Wouldn’t Hold Your Pee In
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Although I am a childhood sexual abuse survivor, when I stepped onto my college’s campus for the first time, I was pretty green about a lot of things when it came to sex. That’s why it threw me off when my freshman year suite mates were trying to convince me that holding urine in during sex intensifies orgasms. Chile…if y’all are out here doing that, that explains why there seems to be an uptick in squirting (some of y’all will catch that later — LOL).
Anyway, what I do know, as far as pee goes, is you should definitely release it after intercourse. According to science, making sure to use the bathroom after sex can help to push out germs and bacteria that may try to get caught up in your urethra, ones that could ultimately lead to a urinary tract infection (UTI).
After Sex Tip #3: Your Vagina Wishes You Wouldn’t Use Harsh Cleansing Products
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It can never be said enough that vaginas are self-cleaning — this means that, even after sex, yours does not need the assistance of douching or you attempting to “clean it out” with some sort of over-the-top body wash or heavily fragranced soap. All that will do is disrupt the pH of your vagina. As far as your vulva — the outer part of your vagina — goes, even that doesn’t need you to go overboard.
Some warm water and a mild, unscented soap are really all that you need, especially since you may have some mild abrasions due to the friction of the sexual experience. Oh, and if you are doing the most, thinking that you can get sperm/semen out of you — that’s not how it works. Once it enters your body, it’s gotta leave in its own time (which tends to be no longer than 5-7 days).
After Sex Tip #4: Your Vagina Wishes You Wouldn’t Put Panties (Back) On
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Even though men have told me that they feel more comfortable with putting a pair of drawers on after having sex, that doesn’t mean that you should automatically follow suit. I mean, unless you plan on getting right into the shower (and fully drying off afterwards), there is probably sweat and other fluids that could be a breeding ground for an infection if you decide to immediately put on panties, lingerie, or some other type of tight-fitting clothing on.
So, stay naked — at least from the bottom down. It’ll give your vagina (and vulva) some time to catch its breath and actually breathe. Yes, literally.
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Without your vagina, sex would suck. LOL. And so, the least you could do is implement these eight tips as a way to show your appreciation. They’re simple things that can make a big difference in how your vagina feels — about sex and you before, during and after it. #wink
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