

Now here's something that I found to be pretty fascinating. Before I get into what a dosha actually is, let's touch a little on the background of what Ayurvedic medicine is all about first. While I'm pretty sure that you've heard of it before, if you're wondering what it technically means, Ayurvedic medicine is considered to be one of the oldest holistic health practices around. It was developed thousands of years ago, in India, with the belief that I firmly support — that the mind, body, and spirit are all supposed to work in harmony, and if we focused more on proactive health than reactive illness, we'd all be the better for it.
Along with this mindset, Ayurvedic medicine promotes the belief that we're all made up of the five basic earth elements — space, air, fire, water, and earth. This is actually where the word "dosha" comes in. So, if you want to learn what it is and how to apply it to your own daily health practice, please read on.
What Exactly Is a Dosha All About?
OK, so you know how Dr. Gary Chapman came up with the idea that love is basically expressed in five main ways (words of affirmation, physical touch, gifts, quality time and acts of service) yet we each need love in 1-2 primary ways (like for me, it's words of affirmation and physical touch)?
Well, while Ayurvedic medicine relies on the five earth elements (space, air, fire, water, and earth), dosha is about each of us inheriting three main ones (which makes sense when you think about the whole "mind, body and spirit" thing) with two being the stronger of the three. The concept is that when we find ourselves not being our best selves, it's typically about something within our individualized dosha being out of balance with the others. Interesting, right?
Now before I break down what each dosha represents, I think it would be helpful if you took your own dosha quiz first. Believe it or not, they aren't very hard to find and many of them are free. You can take one here, here, here, here or here, for starters. None of the tests are long and the objective is simply to find out what your body type is, so that you'll then have a better understanding of how to treat yourself on a mental (mind), physical (body) and internal (spirit) level.
By the way, your options are going to be Vata (space and air), Pitta (fire and water) or Kapha (water and earth). My two cents would be to take three different tests to see which results are the most consistent (I am recommending this based on personal experience). That said, what do all three of these doshas actually mean?
What If You’re “Vata”?
OK, so if your test results say that you're a Vata, it means that your predominant life forces are space and air. As far as how this breaks down regarding the mind, body and spirit tip:
Mind. You tend to be creative and like to think outside of the box a lot. You enjoy new things and taking risks. Because so many ideas come to you on a consistent basis, it can be challenging for you to focus and get/stay organized. You typically have vivid dreams, are prone to overthinking and it's not uncommon for you to have bouts of anxiety because of it.
Body. Naturally dry skin is a constant for you. Your hair can lean towards being dry and brittle as well. You enjoy exercise, sometimes to the point of overdoing it. And when it comes to health-related concerns, asthma, heart disease, skin issues and rheumatoid arthritis are what you have to be on the lookout for. Digestive issues are typically your thing too. As far as your diet goes, you seem to have a liking for comfort foods, things that are prepared in an oil base and you actually don't mind a meal that "sticks to your bones".
Spirit. Spirit speaks to life force, so when it comes to how you live life, your strengths are that you're compassionate, flexible, a quick learner, good multitasker and lots of energy. Your weaknesses include being forgetful, moody, having a difficult time falling and/or staying asleep and being overwhelmed.
What If You’re “Pitta”?
A Pitta's predominant life force consists of fire and water. What this boils down to is:
Mind. You work hard and are pretty task oriented. You're not at peace until the job you committed to is done and sometimes that makes you pretty impatient and irritable. It's not uncommon for folks to use words like "aggressive" or "tenacious" to describe you. Also, you are a great candidate for success because you're very self-motivated with quite the competitive streak.
Body. If anyone can't stand the heat (temperature, that is), it would be Pittas. That's a big part of the reason why you usually sweat more than the other two doshas do. You also have more oily skin than the others which makes you more prone to breakouts. Heart disease, high blood pressure and infections are what you are more vulnerable to. As far as your diet goes, it's best if you avoid hot, spicy and even fermented foods because they have a tendency to mess with your digestive system (although you usually have a quick metabolism and good blood circulation).
Spirit. You're a natural-born leader, so you already know that comes with a mixed bag. As far as your strengths go, you're intelligent, a quick learner, someone who is clear about their life's purpose, you stay focused and are able to achieve great success. Your weaknesses? You are prone to conflict, can be quite impatient, can have a hard time achieving work-life balance, could stand to learn how to be calmer and master how to choose your battles more wisely.
What If You’re “Kapha”?
Finally, the Kapha is all about the life forces of water and earth. This means:
Mind. It's not uncommon for people to describe you as being kind and loyal. You also tend to be a source of stability for those around you. You move at a slow and deliberate pace and, to the outside world, your moods are about as even as they come. The flip side to this is because you are also a natural suppressor, you oftentimes have bouts of loneliness or even depression. This can lead to random impulsive decisions or even binge-eating, if you're not careful. Something else that you have to stay on top of is making sure that "stability" is not a mask for stagnation being that Kaphas are also prone to getting stuck in a rut and staying there.
Body. Your circulation isn't exactly the best which is why your hands and/or feet tend to be cold a lot. Your skin is usually pretty moist. Interestingly enough, a nap in the middle of the day is no biggie to you. Food-wise, dairy and desserts are totally your thing and you will oftentimes drink things that have too much salt in them. What you've got to watch out for is that you're most prone to developing cancer, diabetes, asthma, allergies and becoming overweight which is why it's best to have a diet of light and stimulating meals as much as possible.
Spirit. Humans really don't get much more empathetic and caring as you. Some of your other strengths include profound wisdom, being quite romantic, maintaining a sense of calm, leaning towards the side of optimism and being non-skeptical of others. Weaknesses include sleeping to escape issues (including holding on to other people's stuff), needing constant encouragement, not being self-motivated, not making the most of your time (you know, dragging along) and not being the best planner.
A trip, right? While all of this is merely an introductory course, I thought it was cool to share because if you do indeed see yourself in one of these (again, after taking the quiz), it can help you to make certain adjustments to your mind, body or spirit to see if it helps you to feel better, on a holistic level.
Personally, I've tried it out and have noticed some significant changes over the past few weeks. So, get to know your dosha. Because the more balanced we are all, the better off we'll all be. Amen? Amen.
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
Eva Marcille On Starring In 'Jason’s Lyric Live' & Being An Audacious Black Woman
Eva Marcille has taken her talents to the stage. The model-turned-actress is starring in her first play, Jason’s Lyric Live alongside Allen Payne, K. Michelle, Treach, and others.
The play, produced by Je’Caryous Johnson, is an adaptation of the film, which starred Allen Payne as Jason and Jada Pinkett Smith as Lyric. Allen reprised his role as Jason for the play and Eva plays Lyric.
While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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We don’t get to choose the order we’re born into, but it’s wild how much it can shape who we become. Though birth order may seem like an inconsequential family fun fact, it can influence how we move, love, lead, and even how we see ourselves. Whether you're the dependable oldest, the often-overlooked middle child, the free-spirited baby in the family, or the only child who grew up as their own best friend, there's a chance a few of your core personality traits are tied to the role you played growing up.
Eldest Daughter Syndrome had its viral moment online last year, and for good reason. The term gave language to the silent pressures so many eldest daughters tend to carry as a result of their birth order. Beyond that very needed conversation, birth order as a whole can offer insight into not only our traits and tendencies, but also how we show up in life, love, and even our work.
Below, we’re breaking down the traits most commonly associated with each birth order. Keep reading to learn what your birth order might say about you.
If you are the oldest...
Let's be real, being the firstborn often comes with a lot of responsibility. And it's usually not by choice. From early on, they’re the ones who set the tone, carry the weight, and take on the title of "the responsible one." Because of that, they often grow into reliable, high-achieving adults. But the pressure of being "the blueprint" and the one to "lead by example" can also be a heavy burden to bear.
Oldest child traits may look like:
- Natural leaders that take charge even when they didn’t mean to (read: she's bossy, but keeping it cute)
- High standards (for yourself and everyone else)
- Motivated, goal-oriented, and always chasing that next accomplishment
- Reliable and conscientious
- Perfectionist tendencies that can lead to burnout
- Struggles with being controlling or micromanaging
- Often cautious, craving stability over spontaneity
- Finds it hard to rest or ask for help
If you are the middle child...
In the grand scheme of the birth order lineup, the middle child can be the quiet MVPs. As the child who falls in the order "in-between," they’re used to being the one who keeps the peace while also fighting to stand out. But being the “in-between” can also mean feeling overlooked or forgotten. In some families, especially ones with toxic dynamics, the middle child may even take on the role of the "black sheep," while their siblings are seen as the golden children. Still, despite (or maybe because of) that, middle children tend to thrive socially and can read a room like the back of their hand.
Middle child traits may include:
- Top-tier peacemakers who can smooth over almost any situation
- Adaptable and easygoing (even when they’re lowkey screaming inside)
- Often feel overlooked or like they have to do the most to be seen
- People-pleasers who put everyone else first
- Social butterflies and community-minded, with strong friendships outside the family
- Can be rebellious when they feel boxed in
- Thrive when they’re allowed to define success on their own terms
- The ultimate go-between, translating vibes between generations, personalities, and moods
If you are the youngest...
The baby of the family walks through life knowing how to charm, persuade, and perform. They often grow up with more freedom and fewer expectations, which fuels their adventurous and carefree side. But that same freedom can sometimes lead to entitlement, or a tendency to seek validation by being the "fun one."
Youngest child traits might include:
- Social butterflies who light up a room and don’t mind the spotlight
- Natural charmers, funny, flirtatious, and usually down for anything
- Can be a little self-centered or attention-seeking (but you still love them for it)
- Tend to keep things uncomplicated… unless they’re not getting their way
- Known to be manipulative when trying to get what they want
- Free-spirited and bold in their choices
- Often underestimated, but capable of big things when they focus
- Thrive in spaces that let them express, explore, and be a little extra
If you are the only child...
Only children can be the ultimate "one woman show" as they are often a mix of all the birth orders rolled into one. Without siblings, they learn to entertain themselves, advocate for their needs, and navigate adult conversations early. That independence can make them magnetic, mature, and deeply introspective, but it also comes with a deep craving for validation and control.
Only child traits can include:
- Mature and wise beyond their years, often viewed as old souls
- Conscientious and responsible, usually the go-to person in their circle
- Seek approval and validation more than they let on
- Natural leaders with big ideas and even bigger plans
- Can be sensitive and deeply affected by criticism
- Prefer structure, routines, and control (sometimes to a fault)
- Like things done their way (and don’t love compromising)
- Thrive in solitude but still want to feel seen and celebrated
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