Now here's something that I found to be pretty fascinating. Before I get into what a dosha actually is, let's touch a little on the background of what Ayurvedic medicine is all about first. While I'm pretty sure that you've heard of it before, if you're wondering what it technically means, Ayurvedic medicine is considered to be one of the oldest holistic health practices around. It was developed thousands of years ago, in India, with the belief that I firmly support — that the mind, body, and spirit are all supposed to work in harmony, and if we focused more on proactive health than reactive illness, we'd all be the better for it.
Along with this mindset, Ayurvedic medicine promotes the belief that we're all made up of the five basic earth elements — space, air, fire, water, and earth. This is actually where the word "dosha" comes in. So, if you want to learn what it is and how to apply it to your own daily health practice, please read on.
What Exactly Is a Dosha All About?
OK, so you know how Dr. Gary Chapman came up with the idea that love is basically expressed in five main ways (words of affirmation, physical touch, gifts, quality time and acts of service) yet we each need love in 1-2 primary ways (like for me, it's words of affirmation and physical touch)?
Well, while Ayurvedic medicine relies on the five earth elements (space, air, fire, water, and earth), dosha is about each of us inheriting three main ones (which makes sense when you think about the whole "mind, body and spirit" thing) with two being the stronger of the three. The concept is that when we find ourselves not being our best selves, it's typically about something within our individualized dosha being out of balance with the others. Interesting, right?
Now before I break down what each dosha represents, I think it would be helpful if you took your own dosha quiz first. Believe it or not, they aren't very hard to find and many of them are free. You can take one here, here, here, here or here, for starters. None of the tests are long and the objective is simply to find out what your body type is, so that you'll then have a better understanding of how to treat yourself on a mental (mind), physical (body) and internal (spirit) level.
By the way, your options are going to be Vata (space and air), Pitta (fire and water) or Kapha (water and earth). My two cents would be to take three different tests to see which results are the most consistent (I am recommending this based on personal experience). That said, what do all three of these doshas actually mean?
What If You’re “Vata”?
OK, so if your test results say that you're a Vata, it means that your predominant life forces are space and air. As far as how this breaks down regarding the mind, body and spirit tip:
Mind. You tend to be creative and like to think outside of the box a lot. You enjoy new things and taking risks. Because so many ideas come to you on a consistent basis, it can be challenging for you to focus and get/stay organized. You typically have vivid dreams, are prone to overthinking and it's not uncommon for you to have bouts of anxiety because of it.
Body. Naturally dry skin is a constant for you. Your hair can lean towards being dry and brittle as well. You enjoy exercise, sometimes to the point of overdoing it. And when it comes to health-related concerns, asthma, heart disease, skin issues and rheumatoid arthritis are what you have to be on the lookout for. Digestive issues are typically your thing too. As far as your diet goes, you seem to have a liking for comfort foods, things that are prepared in an oil base and you actually don't mind a meal that "sticks to your bones".
Spirit. Spirit speaks to life force, so when it comes to how you live life, your strengths are that you're compassionate, flexible, a quick learner, good multitasker and lots of energy. Your weaknesses include being forgetful, moody, having a difficult time falling and/or staying asleep and being overwhelmed.
What If You’re “Pitta”?
A Pitta's predominant life force consists of fire and water. What this boils down to is:
Mind. You work hard and are pretty task oriented. You're not at peace until the job you committed to is done and sometimes that makes you pretty impatient and irritable. It's not uncommon for folks to use words like "aggressive" or "tenacious" to describe you. Also, you are a great candidate for success because you're very self-motivated with quite the competitive streak.
Body. If anyone can't stand the heat (temperature, that is), it would be Pittas. That's a big part of the reason why you usually sweat more than the other two doshas do. You also have more oily skin than the others which makes you more prone to breakouts. Heart disease, high blood pressure and infections are what you are more vulnerable to. As far as your diet goes, it's best if you avoid hot, spicy and even fermented foods because they have a tendency to mess with your digestive system (although you usually have a quick metabolism and good blood circulation).
Spirit. You're a natural-born leader, so you already know that comes with a mixed bag. As far as your strengths go, you're intelligent, a quick learner, someone who is clear about their life's purpose, you stay focused and are able to achieve great success. Your weaknesses? You are prone to conflict, can be quite impatient, can have a hard time achieving work-life balance, could stand to learn how to be calmer and master how to choose your battles more wisely.
What If You’re “Kapha”?
Finally, the Kapha is all about the life forces of water and earth. This means:
Mind. It's not uncommon for people to describe you as being kind and loyal. You also tend to be a source of stability for those around you. You move at a slow and deliberate pace and, to the outside world, your moods are about as even as they come. The flip side to this is because you are also a natural suppressor, you oftentimes have bouts of loneliness or even depression. This can lead to random impulsive decisions or even binge-eating, if you're not careful. Something else that you have to stay on top of is making sure that "stability" is not a mask for stagnation being that Kaphas are also prone to getting stuck in a rut and staying there.
Body. Your circulation isn't exactly the best which is why your hands and/or feet tend to be cold a lot. Your skin is usually pretty moist. Interestingly enough, a nap in the middle of the day is no biggie to you. Food-wise, dairy and desserts are totally your thing and you will oftentimes drink things that have too much salt in them. What you've got to watch out for is that you're most prone to developing cancer, diabetes, asthma, allergies and becoming overweight which is why it's best to have a diet of light and stimulating meals as much as possible.
Spirit. Humans really don't get much more empathetic and caring as you. Some of your other strengths include profound wisdom, being quite romantic, maintaining a sense of calm, leaning towards the side of optimism and being non-skeptical of others. Weaknesses include sleeping to escape issues (including holding on to other people's stuff), needing constant encouragement, not being self-motivated, not making the most of your time (you know, dragging along) and not being the best planner.
A trip, right? While all of this is merely an introductory course, I thought it was cool to share because if you do indeed see yourself in one of these (again, after taking the quiz), it can help you to make certain adjustments to your mind, body or spirit to see if it helps you to feel better, on a holistic level.
Personally, I've tried it out and have noticed some significant changes over the past few weeks. So, get to know your dosha. Because the more balanced we are all, the better off we'll all be. Amen? Amen.
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Now, while it’s another message for another time that if this type of sex-related craving feels impulsive or out of one’s control, it could be a sign of someone who is leaning into some level of sex addiction; however, that is not what we’re going to unpack today. Today, we’re going to look into what could be going on with you if it seems like, lately, you’ve been having a greater desire for sex, and you can’t quite pinpoint why.
Because, just like, say, a craving for a particular type of food oftentimes reveals something that is going on with you physically or mentally — sex cravings tend to bring certain things to light in those same areas, too.
Let’s dig in…
Hormonal Shifts
GiphyAlthough I don’t have social media accounts, I do tiptoe out there to see what’s going on — and boy, do I roll my eyes whenever I hear folks act like being over 40 is old. SMDH. It’s especially annoying when I hear about it in the context of sex because, believe it or not, there are a lot of late perimenopausal and menopausal women who are “gettin’ theirs” more than some of these 20 and 30-year-olds are (just ask them).
One reason is that the fear of experiencing an unplanned pregnancy, for many, is now in their rearview mirror. Another is because some are taking a form of hormone therapy to treat the changes that their system is going through — and when you’re getting more estrogen, progesterone, and/or testosterone into your body (in order to level things out) — HUNNAY.
For other women, even consuming phytoestrogens (plant-based estrogen) like peaches, garlic, berries, spinach, and cabbage can make them want sex more than when those aren’t a part of their diet. Bottom line here, a shift in your sexual hormones can definitely cause you to desire sex more than you have before (or have in a while).
Ovulation
GiphyBack when I was a teen mom director for the local chapter of a national non-profit, something that I used to tell “my daughters” all of the time is when you know that you’re ovulating, that’s when you need to be hypervigilant about using wisdom when it comes to the sex-related decisions that you make. I’m thinking that most of you get why: your body was designed to feel its horniest when you’re able to get pregnant — and that is during your time of ovulation.
That’s why it really is a good idea to keep up with your cycle and, if a baby is not something that is on your priority list right now, you either avoid having sex during that time of the month or make sure to use some form of birth control. Chile, even women with low libidos can find themselves wanting to hang off of a chandelier or two when they are ovulating. It’s nature’s way.
A Healthy Diet
GiphyIf you happen to be someone with a sluggish sex drive and you know that you spend most of your time in a drive-thru, there is probably a direct correlation there. No joke. There is plenty of research out in cyberspace to support the fact that a wack diet and low sex drive have a lot in common. While processed foods and unhealthy fats can throw your (sex) hormones off, foods that are filled with zinc, vitamins B12 and D, and iron can ramp up your desire for intimacy.
This is why many people who decide to make a lifestyle change as far as their eating habits are concerned are oftentimes surprised by how much sex is on their minds and how much easier it is for them to orgasm because of it. While a part of it can be due to a boost in their sexual confidence, a lot of it has to do with consuming foods that will literally feed their libido (in a healthy way).
More Exercise
GiphyPlainly put, exercise makes you hornier. Not only does it boost your testosterone levels, (consistently) working out also lowers your stress levels and gives you a boost in the self-esteem department. On top of that, exercise makes you more flexible, builds up endurance, and increases blood circulation which can turn around and intensify your climaxes as a direct result. In fact, this is oftentimes why people will want to have sex right after a workout session.
While we’re here, let me also share that too much of a good thing can end up being counterproductive. What I mean by that is, that although it is wise to exercise on a regular basis, make sure to not overdo it. Something known as overtraining syndrome can result in fatigue, insomnia, and irritability; no one can really have amazing sex when all of that is going on.
Being a Certain Age
GiphyWhile it used to be said that the sexual peak for men is in their teens and for women, it’s in their 30s (some believe it’s because after 35, it’s more challenging for women to get pregnant and so our biological clock plays a role in it all), some research believes that coming to that conclusion isn’t fair because aging affects people differently. For instance, while on one hand, people in their 40s tend to see a dip in their sex hormones, as we’ve already discussed, hormone therapy (for both men and women) can level some of those issues out, if not increase some people’s sex drives altogether.
Adding to that, it should also go on record that some studies indicate that women between the ages of 27-45 actually have a stronger desire — or craving — for sex than women between the ages of 18-26. So honestly, there goes the myth that being younger (automatically) means that you’re hornier. #Elmoshrug
Certain Medications
GiphyIf you used to have a higher sex drive and you’re currently on an antidepressant, that could be why your desire for copulation has decreased. Some studies say that as much as 40 percent of people who are on these types of medication end up having a lower libido (by the way, antihistamines and beta-blockers can have this effect, too).
On the other hand, if you’ve been taking a prescribed drug to increase your sex drive (perhaps like Vyleesi or Addyi), then it would make sense that you may have an increased libido level. Other meds that may have a similar effect include birth control pills (since they alter your hormones), medications that help to treat Parkinson’s disease, along with dopamine-related drugs.
Less Stress
GiphyIf, on the days when you don’t seem to have a care in the world, you also desire sex more than usual, that’s not a coincidence either. Thing is, when you’re all stressed out, that can cause the stress hormone known as cortisol to work overtime and, when that happens, that can end up suppressing your sex hormones which can deplete you of sexual urges. Ironically, there is a flip side to this because when you engage in sexual activity, that actually elevates feel-good (and bonding) hormones like dopamine, oxytocin, and endorphins, which can also de-stress you.
So basically, if you’re craving sex, you probably aren’t very stressed out (right now), and if you want to stop being stressed out, you probably should have some sex (some protected sex, if you don’t want to be stressed later up the road…if you know what I mean).
Having an Amazing Sex Life
GiphyTo me, this one right here should be a given because when something is both good to and for you, why wouldn’t you want more of it? So yeah, if you have a great sex life with someone, it’s common sense that you’d want to engage in that act with them as much as possible. Hey, not to mention the fact that orgasms activate your brain in a way similar to a drug high does.
So, if while reading this, you’re thinking about sexting your bae to make arrangements to — eh hem — satisfy your craving, I say go for it! To “greatly want” to connect with your partner in order to have some fulfilling and satisfying sex? What in the world could possibly be wrong with that?! Not a damn thing.
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