
‘It Was Her’: Blair Underwood Opens Up About Marrying His Longtime Friend Josie Hart After Divorce

At 60 years old, Blair Underwood has never lost "it." It was a thought that came to me frequently as I indulged in the 1-hour listen that was his recent interview with the fellas of Nice & Neat The Podcast. I must admit, for the entire duration, the veteran actor had me utterly entranced.
In episode 124, aptly titled "BLAIR UNDERWOOD," the Three Women star detailed his more-than-30-year career journey, the male heroes who have helped shape who he is in his masculinity, being the "good guy" versus the "bad guy" on screen, and walking into the most recent chapters of his life with an unapologetic demeanor that comes with wisdom and age.
Blair also played coy when asked to rank himself among the quintessential fine 90's Black men like Morris Chestnut and Shemar Moore. "I can't quite answer that. That's not really for me to answer," he said in the podcast. Sure Blair, sure.
The actor has had more than 30 years in the game with his fair share of leading man roles alongside actresses like Jada Pinkett Smith and Julia Roberts has also showcased versatility in villainous turns in his portrayals in films like Madea's Family Reunion and the thriller Just Cause. The duality of the types of complex roles Blair has taken on as an actor can sometimes be so far removed from who he is as a man and how he defines his masculinity.
Blair credited the "male heroes" in his life, like his father, Sidney Poitier, and his pastor for helping him understand what masculinity looked like to him and in turn what he brings to his characters on-screen. "It's not just being strong physically," he said when talking about masculinity. "It's not just being...even 'strong' in a relationship, it's about being able to listen and hear. Hear your partner, hear your family, hear your kids."
Blair also touched on some rumors that started to swirl since his private life had become the talk of public fodder. For much of his time in the public eye, he was married to Desiree DaCosta from 1994 to 2021 when news of their divorce was made public. The couple shared three kids (two sons and a daughter).
A divorce after 30 years can be shocking, but what made the split controversial was Blair's second marriage to his long-time friend Josie Hart that quickly followed. Blair and Josie married on June 24, 2023. When asked how he navigated the divorce from his first wife, Blair revealed, "You know, I've found in life, in this industry, in this business, but especially in marriage that you have to be so often intentional. Be specific, particular, and intentional about what you want to accomplish."
"My ex-wife, at the time of the divorce, what we wanted to accomplish was for us to be in a healthy place, coming through a divorce, and most importantly, our kids would be in a healthy place," he continued.
"So, what was intentional was how we speak to them. Once we had decided that it was time, that our marriage had kind of come to a natural conclusion, and we both agreed that, you know, after 27 -- 30 years together, 27 years of marriage -- it was time."
Blair Underwood and Desiree DaCosta
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Blair shared that he felt the pandemic further punctuated the fact that their marriage had come to an end. He would later detail in the same interview that he felt he and his ex-wife stopped growing together in their marriage in 2012 when he went to New York to do Broadway in A Streetcar Named Desire. The bottom line was, who they were in the present no longer aligned. They were different people.
They decided on the divorce together and then decided how they would tell their kids. Their solution was to write "almost like a script" where each of them handled different aspects of breaking the news of their decision to their kids.
He called it one of the most difficult conversations he has ever had in his life. "These are my children. These are my hearts," he explained. "These are my hearts beating outside of me." He recalled their kids needing time to process before coming back to the table and having another heart-to-heart where they answered questions openly and honestly. Blair said he didn't care about the "tabloid of it all" as much as he cared about his "three human beings" and "the integrity to my ex-wife."
"There was no screwing around, no behind-the-scenes stuff, so I could hold my head high because I honored that relationship and I honored my three kids," he shared.
Blair lightly addressed some of the rumors swirling out there about him and his current wife's relationship, saying, "What everyone else might speculate or think, because my wife now, we've known each other for 43 years. We've been great friends. But you can be great friends... You can be friends without having to cross that line."
Even though Blair admitted that he and his ex-wife were on the same page about getting a divorce, they didn't take the decision lightly. The former couple sought counseling and prayer. "The therapy was about, let's see where God leads us. If there was another answer to stay together, I wanted that answer. If the answer was, it's not meant to stay together, I wanted- that was the answer I got. But we both came to that answer."
Fast-forward to today, Blair was aware of the narrative of him supposedly leaving his ex-wife to get with his best friend but allowed it to just fall off his shoulders. As far as he was concerned, he knew the truth. His kids also knew the truth. His ex-wife knew the truth. And for him, the truth was what mattered most. Not the tabloid rumors.
He also knew the collective disappointment the public might have in him for having a marriage that lasted so long and a marriage that might have been upheld to a certain degree as "goals." But he had to live his life for him, not for the public. "I'm not playing a role. This is my real life," he said.
Blair revealed he had no idea that another marriage would be on the horizon for him, let alone a marriage to his great friend Josie. He was open. "It was her," he stated simply of his revelation. At that point, he had been dating for six months and Josie had been divorced for seven years.
"Four decades of friendship, of family, of understanding each other, you know? We're- she's godmother of my son. I'm the godfather of her daughter. My brother's the godfather of some of her kids. You know, we have nine kids between us so there's history in the friendship. I see her ex with all her kids and the grandkids. You know, we're cool.
"It's taken time and process. But the reason that can be now is because there was such a history before. But most importantly -- and what I do want to say for people to understand this -- most importantly... it was important that I honor everybody in the process. I honor my ex-wife in the marriage and in the divorce. I honor my children. So you can hold your head high when you've done those things."
He repeated his reasoning for getting married so quickly after a divorce, "It was her." He listed more things that revealed her to him as his second wife. She knew him before he was Blair Underwood when the actor was 16 and had no fame. "She knew me and has known me. And I consider our relationship- I categorize it as a 43-year unfinished conversation."
Watch the full episode of the podcast below:
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Eva Marcille On Starring In 'Jason’s Lyric Live' & Being An Audacious Black Woman
Eva Marcille has taken her talents to the stage. The model-turned-actress is starring in her first play, Jason’s Lyric Live alongside Allen Payne, K. Michelle, Treach, and others.
The play, produced by Je’Caryous Johnson, is an adaptation of the film, which starred Allen Payne as Jason and Jada Pinkett Smith as Lyric. Allen reprised his role as Jason for the play and Eva plays Lyric.
While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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We don’t get to choose the order we’re born into, but it’s wild how much it can shape who we become. Though birth order may seem like an inconsequential family fun fact, it can influence how we move, love, lead, and even how we see ourselves. Whether you're the dependable oldest, the often-overlooked middle child, the free-spirited baby in the family, or the only child who grew up as their own best friend, there's a chance a few of your core personality traits are tied to the role you played growing up.
Eldest Daughter Syndrome had its viral moment online last year, and for good reason. The term gave language to the silent pressures so many eldest daughters tend to carry as a result of their birth order. Beyond that very needed conversation, birth order as a whole can offer insight into not only our traits and tendencies, but also how we show up in life, love, and even our work.
Below, we’re breaking down the traits most commonly associated with each birth order. Keep reading to learn what your birth order might say about you.
If you are the oldest...
Let's be real, being the firstborn often comes with a lot of responsibility. And it's usually not by choice. From early on, they’re the ones who set the tone, carry the weight, and take on the title of "the responsible one." Because of that, they often grow into reliable, high-achieving adults. But the pressure of being "the blueprint" and the one to "lead by example" can also be a heavy burden to bear.
Oldest child traits may look like:
- Natural leaders that take charge even when they didn’t mean to (read: she's bossy, but keeping it cute)
- High standards (for yourself and everyone else)
- Motivated, goal-oriented, and always chasing that next accomplishment
- Reliable and conscientious
- Perfectionist tendencies that can lead to burnout
- Struggles with being controlling or micromanaging
- Often cautious, craving stability over spontaneity
- Finds it hard to rest or ask for help
If you are the middle child...
In the grand scheme of the birth order lineup, the middle child can be the quiet MVPs. As the child who falls in the order "in-between," they’re used to being the one who keeps the peace while also fighting to stand out. But being the “in-between” can also mean feeling overlooked or forgotten. In some families, especially ones with toxic dynamics, the middle child may even take on the role of the "black sheep," while their siblings are seen as the golden children. Still, despite (or maybe because of) that, middle children tend to thrive socially and can read a room like the back of their hand.
Middle child traits may include:
- Top-tier peacemakers who can smooth over almost any situation
- Adaptable and easygoing (even when they’re lowkey screaming inside)
- Often feel overlooked or like they have to do the most to be seen
- People-pleasers who put everyone else first
- Social butterflies and community-minded, with strong friendships outside the family
- Can be rebellious when they feel boxed in
- Thrive when they’re allowed to define success on their own terms
- The ultimate go-between, translating vibes between generations, personalities, and moods
If you are the youngest...
The baby of the family walks through life knowing how to charm, persuade, and perform. They often grow up with more freedom and fewer expectations, which fuels their adventurous and carefree side. But that same freedom can sometimes lead to entitlement, or a tendency to seek validation by being the "fun one."
Youngest child traits might include:
- Social butterflies who light up a room and don’t mind the spotlight
- Natural charmers, funny, flirtatious, and usually down for anything
- Can be a little self-centered or attention-seeking (but you still love them for it)
- Tend to keep things uncomplicated… unless they’re not getting their way
- Known to be manipulative when trying to get what they want
- Free-spirited and bold in their choices
- Often underestimated, but capable of big things when they focus
- Thrive in spaces that let them express, explore, and be a little extra
If you are the only child...
Only children can be the ultimate "one woman show" as they are often a mix of all the birth orders rolled into one. Without siblings, they learn to entertain themselves, advocate for their needs, and navigate adult conversations early. That independence can make them magnetic, mature, and deeply introspective, but it also comes with a deep craving for validation and control.
Only child traits can include:
- Mature and wise beyond their years, often viewed as old souls
- Conscientious and responsible, usually the go-to person in their circle
- Seek approval and validation more than they let on
- Natural leaders with big ideas and even bigger plans
- Can be sensitive and deeply affected by criticism
- Prefer structure, routines, and control (sometimes to a fault)
- Like things done their way (and don’t love compromising)
- Thrive in solitude but still want to feel seen and celebrated
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