Self-Care For Idris Elba Means Cutting Back On Social Media
Whoever told you self-care can't be masculine was a damn lie and Idris Elba is here to prove it. Celebrities aren't immune to burnout and in Fast Company'sSecrets of the Most Productive People segment, Idris spilled the details on how he keeps "the grind" from grinding him to death. The actor, who says that he plans his schedule out yearly, explained that even as a child, he's always been preoccupied with keeping himself busy.
"I'm an only child, and growing up it was a constant challenge to entertain myself. I've been keeping busy my whole life: I'm primarily an actor, but I've been DJing since I was a teenager. I'm a producer and a director. I've done fashion collaborations, and I have a music label."
Idris also noted that he has just as hard of a time putting down his phone as we do. When it comes to social media, the 47-year-old actor explained that he's intentional about logging off to preserve his peace of mind:
"I've been trying to wean myself off. I used to post a lot more, but it's been putting me off lately. And Twitter's just not how I want to receive my news. I read the news aggregated on my iPad, but I can't check it constantly—I'm not proud of it, but it's true—because it makes me feel depressed."
While checking your phone first thing in the morning may feel instinctual, Idris says he's made a habit out of replacing his morning scroll with daily meditations:
"I'll just sit in the dark, stare, and try not to do anything. Just clear my mind and decompress."
Along with making sure to be in bed by 9 or 10 at night, Idris also says DJing and creating music are two of his ways of working self-care into his regular routine, but this salt-and-pepper chocolate drop isn't the only male celebrity who's up on his self-care game. Here's how 3 other celebrity men practice self-care to prevent burnout:
Common On Meditation & Self-Recovery:
Since the release of his book, Let Love Have the Last Word, Common has been on a very public journey to self-recovery and we are here for all of it. Along with scheduling meditation sessions and visiting wellness sanctuaries, Common also makes great use of his alone time:
"I form my own way of meditating. People think I'm using the bathroom all the time. But sometimes I go in there to get my space, to just center myself."
Big Sean On Mental Health & Self-Care:
Last year, Big Sean announced that he was taking some time away from music to focus on his mental health and self-care never looked sexier:
"I started realizing that you can't give or depend on somebody for a good time if you can't give it to yourself. So, I started doing things by myself, doing things I never thought I'd do, like going skydiving or whatever I thought was fun, just doing it. In the midst, I definitely rediscovered myself and found a whole new energy, and me being the source of it and not somebody else."
Keith Powers On Anxiety & Mental Health:
Keith Powers recently opened up about his battle with anxiety and shared this simple lifehack that will level up your mental health game for the better:
"I think writing in your journal is very important. It's very underrated, but it feels good to just get all of that down on paper, you know, to be able to write that on paper and write why you may be having anxiety, you know what I'm saying?"
Featured image by Denis Makarenko / Shutterstock.com
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- Idris Elba Says He's Taking a Break from Social Media | PEOPLE.com ›
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Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Another season of Love Is Blind has come to a close, and almost two months later we’re still unpacking the drama that is Clay and AD. The finale, reunion, and post-interviews with Clay and AD after season six of Love Is Blind left millions of people wondering - why couldn’t AD see the signs? Clay told her he had a fear of marriage, his parents experienced infidelity, and he seemed to have many doubts about saying, "I do."
After changing his mind at the altar and hearing AD question why she feels like she’s never enough, I was finished watching. I didn’t need to hear anything else because, at that moment, I realized this wasn’t about Clay; this was about AD feeling inadequate before she ever met Clay.
If I’m honest, I don’t watch much dating television. TikTok keeps me updated with the clips that I need to see in order to be kept in the loop, but it’s difficult for me to watch an entire season of dating TV because seeing Black women settle for less and questioning their beauty is a trigger for me. In many ways, there were points in my life where I was AD, settling and ignoring red flags because I wanted to be loved.
Now, on the other side, it doesn’t feel good to see Black women lower their standards on national television. There have been many hot takes on this couple and who was in the wrong. Did Clay play in AD’s face or did she not listen to the truth of what he told her from day one? Was his reason for joining the show to promote his business and not to find the one?
We’ll never know the truth, but what we can do is learn tactics to better our self-worth. Founder and CEO of The Self Love Organization Denise Francis shared her expertise with xoNecole on what tangible steps to take to improve feelings of worthiness. “Self-love blooms in a garden where self-worth is planted, nourished, and whole. However, when your self-worth is challenged, displaced, or broken, it could be difficult to rebuild," Denise explains.
How To Rebuild Self-Worth
During her self-love coaching sessions, Denise likes to walk her clients through the cornerstones of rebuilding self-worth: grace and self-compassion. To her, self-worth is never lost, it's only displaced, so practicing self-compassion and giving yourself grace is a must. "We tend to place our self-worth in entities and people of ourselves such as relationship status, physical appearance, material possessions, social media followings, what others think of us, and more. Self-worth is not something to be measured by anyone or anything outside of ourselves because we all innately hold value and worth.
"Self-worth is not something to be measured by anyone or anything outside of ourselves because we all innately hold value and worth."
"When we place our value into people or things, we tend to feel that we are not enough, worth it, special, or important when relationship status, job titles, friendships, and physical appearances are lost or changed. We then tend to feel lost within ourselves because we’ve placed our value outside of ourselves. Using grace and compassion, you can rebuild your self-worth by returning home to who you are at your core," she concludes.
How To Return Home To Yourself
Denise advises taking a step back and using self-reflection through journaling by answering the following journaling prompts:
First, ask yourself, "What do you tend to attach your self-worth to and why?"
Is it your relationships, your job title, your finances, your appearance, etc.? Why do you think you place so much emphasis on external status? How does it make you feel when you are defining yourself through these entities and/or people outside of yourself?
Then, ask yourself, "Without these things, who am I?"
Once you have your answers, show yourself kindness, remove the shame, and, as Denise says, "Redefine yourself by detaching your value from the things and people you have no control over and no longer serve you. Challenge yourself to define yourself outside of titles and societal values."
"By returning home to your core, you find value in who you are as a person. You begin to find value in the way you love instead of your relationship status, your compassion instead of your popularity, your drive instead of your income/job title, and your heart instead of your physical appearance," she adds.
"By returning home to your core, you find value in who you are as a person."
"Be intentional with healing your self-worth by leaning into the people and things that nourish your core values. Surround yourself with the people who love and cherish you, they will always remind you just how valuable you truly are."
It all goes back to self-compassion and grace. As Denise explains, leading with those two things as you heal and rebuild your self-worth allows you to reduce negative self-talk that might come up for you. "This weakens thoughts like, 'I am not enough... why am I never enough?'" she shares, "And 'I don't deserve this while strengthening thoughts like 'I deserve better,' 'I am enough,' and 'I am worth it.'"
Denise continues, "Once you return home and remember the irreplaceable person you are, you can rebuild your self-worth by placing it back where it belongs. It belongs to you."
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