March is a turning point and is when massive changes begin to occur. This is the time of the year when there is an inner awakening for more, and the curiosity that blooms opens new doors. In the stars, March is the month that ushers in Eclipse Season, when two eclipses occur back-to-back, and the transformations that come with it are inevitable. However, you are the leader of your life and are the one who can guide and embrace these changes as they come. March is the month to turn a new page, gain clarity, and get inspired.
March 2024 Monthly Horoscopes: The Month Ahead
Pisces Season opens the month for us, and being in this water sign energy always brings more emotions to the surface than usual. With Saturn also being in Pisces right now, there is a balance needed between what we are flowing forward with and what needs to be taken more seriously and grounded in. Mercury enters Aries on March 9, directing our will, passions, and integrity to where our most powerful ideas are flowing right now. Mercury in Aries tends to speak before thinking, however, and communication should be handled with a little more tender love and care for the time being. Be careful with impulsion, and write down your ideas and insights as they come.
On March 10, there is a New Moon in Pisces, and this New Moon is beckoning us to move forward with our creative passions, interests, and spirituality. What have you been inspired to learn more about or dive deeper into? This New Moon is a good time to set your inventions for any creative projects and also for where you want to see the magic grow in your relationships and love life.
Venus enters Pisces the following day on Mar. 11, and this is bringing in some sweet, romantic, and dreamy energy into matters of the heart until Apr. 5.
Aries Season begins on Mar. 19 this year, and we enter a time of fire sign energy as we close out the month. Aries Season is when the changes and transformations begin to light up the sky, and when things get moving for the collective. Mars enters Pisces on Mar. 22, and Mars in this sign is motivated toward love, creativity, and closure. Mars in Pisces is healing energy and is a good time to let go of anything heavy that has been weighing you down. With the Sun in Aries and Mars in Pisces, this time is all about feeling things through, not letting change overwhelm you, and seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.
At the end of the month, we have the first eclipse of 2024. This eclipse will be a Penumbral Full Moon Lunar Eclipse in Libra and will be on Mar. 25. This is the Worm Moon of the year and the time when powerful changes often take place. Remember, though, Eclipses tend to shake things up and make things unsettled for a bit before their permanence takes shape. Since this Full Moon is happening in Libra, the transformations now are typically ones to do with love, relationships, finances, and inner and outer harmony.
March is an awakening and opening to a new way of seeing the world, love, and the manifestations you want to occur.
Read for your sun and rising sign below.
1.ARIES
ARIESKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis is your month to let go and rewrite your story, Aries. You are moving through culminations and new beginnings in March, and it’s best to go with the flow with the changes of the month. Emotions are high, and you are especially sensitive right now, so give yourself grace as you move through this time. Mercury enters your sign on Mar. 9, and this is helping you find the clarity and inspiration you have been looking for.
The New Moon on Mar. 10 is a chance to see the gifts of what has been let go from your life. You are processing your emotions this month and wiping away the pain of the past. Aries Season officially begins on Mar. 19, and you are ready to shine and create a new day. The end of the month is an enlightening time for you and once the eclipse occurs on Mar. 25, your heart is filled with gratitude for the love and new beginnings that are flowing in.
2.TAURUS
TAURUSKyra Jay for xoNecoleMarch is awakening your inner magic, Taurus. This is the time to stay open to the mysteries of life and to give yourself a second chance at a new beginning. It’s about looking at your life, where your happiness is, and where you want to continue to grow. Friendships and your community are playing a key role in your life this month, and the New Moon on Mar. 10 is when you are going to see some of your intentions here manifest for you.
Venus, your ruling planet and the planet of love, moves into your 11th house of friendships, hopes, and dreams on Mar. 11, and this is the energy that you need to be in right now. Your heart is feeling the magic that comes from opening up and believing in yourself this month. On Mar. 19, Aries Season begins, and the sun moves into the very bottom of your chart, a preparation phase before your season begins. As the month comes to a close, allow yourself a little more time to rest, get grounded, and enjoy where things are.
3.GEMINI
GEMINIKyra Jay for xoNecoleYour strength is needed this month as you overcome some mountains you have been climbing, Gemini. This is a month to turn the focus inward and to heal and regain your strength from there. Mercury, your ruling planet, moves into an area of your chart at the beginning of March that brings your dreams and inspirations into focus. You are thinking a lot about the future this month, and this energy is helping you move through the closures you are experiencing.
Once the Sun moves into Aries on Mar. 19, the energy is more favorable for you and you are no longer feeling stuck in your current circumstances. Obstacles move away, and you have more opportunities for happiness. The Full Moon Lunar Eclipse happening at the end of the month is happening in a fellow air sign, Libra, and is bringing some love and romantic energy into your life, and you are growing flowers from the weeds as March ends.
4.CANCER
CANCERKyra Jay for xoNecoleMarch is about getting grounded, moving forward, and taking the lessons along with the blessings, Cancer. This is a month of growth, and also a time when you are finding your inner peace and settling more into the present moment. You flow well with the energy of the month with Pisces Season here, and the Sun is in your 9th house of adventure. This is a good month to think big picture, connect with nature, and honor the magic and wisdom within you.
The Full Moon Lunar Eclipse happening at the end of the month is shaking things up for you when it comes to the home, family, and foundations, and will be bringing things here into focus. Emotionally, you may be feeling some highs and lows this month, and this eclipse is helping you find a safe space to renew. Before the month ends, Vesta enters your sign, and this energy reminds you to tend to your emotions and the sacred fire within you. In March, you are breaking free.
5.LEO
LEOKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis is a month of honoring your free spirit, Leo. The pace is picking up for you in March, and there is a lot of happiness and opportunity surrounding you. You are feeling liberated in being your authentic self, and you are shining in the new spaces you are finding yourself in. The New Moon at the beginning of the month is awakening something within you emotionally, and you are moving through a rebirth in your life right now, one where you are seeing more of your inner power that has always been there.
Aries Season begins on Mar. 19, and the Sun moves into a fellow fire sign, further heightening the positive energy you are moving through this month. You are setting your intentions and seeing dreams coming true. Before the month ends, a Lunar Eclipse is happening in your 3rd house of communication, and you are allowing who you are to come to the surface as you express yourself. You are letting go of insecurities and allowing yourself to take up space this month.
6.VIRGO
VIRGOKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis is a month of reflection, setting your intentions, and focusing on the bigger picture, Virgo. You are remaining patient with what is coming to light for you, and seeking inspiration and empowerment in the present moment. Most of the energy in March is happening in your 7th house of love and partnerships, and you are finding your balance between your needs and those you are close to. The New Moon on Mar. 10 is a good time to set your intentions for love and to expect a blessing here.
Venus and Mars both enter your house of love this month as well, and there is something to say about loving yourself just as much as you yearn for the love of others. March is reminding you where it all starts, and showing you the beauty within and around you. The Lunar Eclipse happening on Mar. 23 is a time of closure for you financially, and you are ending a journey here as you prepare for another, more lucrative one.
7.LIBRA
LIBRAKyra Jay for xoNecoleYou are one of the power players of the month, Libra, with a Lunar Eclipse happening in your sign at the end of March- the first one of the year. This is a month of moving from closures into a new door, and you are finding yourself in the middle of these transformations that are occurring. The Sun is in your 6th house of health, daily routine, and well-being for most of the month, and this is a good time to focus on what is going to be the healthiest path for you moving forward.
Aries Season begins on Mar. 19, and the Sun moves into your opposite sign. This energy brings in a time when the focus is more on your partnerships and the love you want to see grow here. On Mar. 25, there is a Full Moon Lunar Eclipse in your sign, and you end the month walking through a big change in your life. You may need some time to process and regroup at the end of March as old dreams are fulfilled and new ones are fueling you forward.
8.SCORPIO
SCORPIOKyra Jay for xoNecoleMarch is bringing romance into your life, Scorpio, and is a time when you are leading yourself forward and letting go of the past. You are the creator of your world, and you are creating from the heart right now. With the Sun in your 5th house and a New Moon here on the 10th, this is a month to express yourself, get creative with life, and believe in a miracle in love. You deserve to receive the love and dedication you give, and it’s time to open up to allow it in.
Mars, your ruling planet, moves into your 5th house on Mar. 22 as well, fueling even more of your passion and intentions into being more confident and expressing who you are to the world. This is the month to get out of your shell and shine your light. The eclipse happening at the end of March is a big time of closure for you as you let go of what hasn’t been working out, heal, and breathe a little easier in the process.
9.SAGITTARIUS
SAGITTARIUSKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis is a month of adventure, empowerment, and divine purpose, Sagittarius. You are feeling inspired by the new doors that are opening for you now, and you are walking into them diligently. With Mercury moving into a fellow fire sign at the beginning of the month, you are moving into March feeling inspired, loved, and full of hope. This is an exciting time for you, and one where adventure is calling.
On Mar. 25, a Lunar Eclipse is occurring in your 11th house of friendship, community, and manifestation, and you are coming full circle with matters here. You are seeing some changes in who you surround yourself with at the end of the month, but you are also opening up to more of what is possible for you here. Pallas goes retrograde in your sign on the 29th, and this energy is reminding you to trust your inner wisdom and to think things through thoroughly this month.
10.CAPRICORN
CAPRICORNKyra Jay for xoNecoleMarch is about making yourself proud, Capricorn. You are focused on the dreams you want to be fulfilled and the responsibilities you need to tend to, and your priorities are intact. The Sun is in your 3rd house of communication for most of the month, and this is a time filled with clarity, perspective, and hope. You are ready to take action on the things you have been pondering over, and you are in a good headspace to do so right now.
On Mar. 19, the energy moves from the mind and into the home, and the second half of March is more about tending to your needs at home, taking care of your emotional world, connecting with family or loved ones, and building your foundations. On Mar. 25, a Lunar Eclipse is occurring in your house of career and reputation, and you are seeing old projects come full circle, and congratulations are in order. The end of March is shaping things for you moving forward and setting the tone for the changes that will be happening within your career and professional ventures this year.
11.AQUARIUS
AQUARIUSKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is about acceptance and letting go, Aquarius. The year has just begun, but you have already been moving through more changes and opportunities at clarity than most, and March is no different. With the energy in a financial area of your chart this month, this is a good time to plan for the future financially, to let go of any unhealthy habits here, and to surrender to the good.
The New Moon on Mar. 10 is one of the best times of the year for you to set your intentions for abundance, and this month is about focusing on the fact that you are worthy of the things you seek in life. The Lunar Eclipse on Mar. 25 is happening in a fellow air sign, and you are feeling enlightened and hopeful as the month ends. This eclipse is closing a door of stagnation in your life and opening a new one of excitement and adventure. You’ll find that the gifts of your life come from acceptance this month.
12.PISCES
PISCESKyra Jay for xoNecoleYour season is here, and it’s your time to shine and thrive, beautiful. With Pisces Season underway and the Sun in your 1st house of self, you are moving through March feeling empowered, loved, and divinely guided. A lot of the astrological transits of the month are happening in your sign, so emotions are also running high right now. The New Moon in Pisces on Mar. 10 is a time to set intentions for your future and to go where you feel guided towards.
Venus, the planet of love, enters your sign on Mar. 11, and relationship matters move through a time of healing this month. Love is flowing toward you, and you are feeling a positive transformation from it. Pisces Season ends on Mar. 19, but Mars enters your sign on Mar. 22, and you are still feeling motivated by your personal goals and dreams. This is a month to trust yourself and where things are moving and to be confident in the life you are leading right now. You deserve love and respect, and it’s coming your way right now, Pisces.
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2023 was my year, and it was my turn. I had just completed an 8-month holistic detox. The glow-up was real and well-deserved. The way I have poured into myself is unmatched. Let me tell you, self-love is a love you have never known. After a five-year healing journey, I finally felt like myself again, and I was ready to play. My heart was open, my mind was clear, and my body hella transformed. I had told all my friends that I was ready to explore dating again, and at the height of summer, I did exactly just that.
This time I decided I wanted to take my time. I wanted to date the “right way” or the “healthy way.” You know, keep your options open, ask the right questions, believe actions and not words, observe patterns and pay attention to red, yellow, and green flags. I was never the dating app type of girl. I sincerely miss everything about human connection and dating from 2000 to 2012. Can we please bring all of that back into 2024? I prefer to feel a man’s energy and presence in real-time. Nonetheless, I still chose to dabble with a few dating apps. I was all the way outside and dating for practice.
Unfortunately, with today’s dating culture, social climate, and how some of these men move and/or behave, these dates were a dead end. Not one guy made it to my roster. What these men were was benched this season – not one of them could be my first-round select draft pick. It didn't seem like anyone I met was interested in a serious relationship. And it’s completely fine. Miss me with the ghosting, lack of effort, inconsistency, and poor communication. I continued to just do me because what is for me will not miss me.
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The universe must have heard me talking because I had specifically told my closest girlfriends that I wanted to meet someone who lived in the vicinity, no more than twenty minutes away, and no more long distance. And I did meet him (it’s crazy how I manifest exactly what I want). As we started to get to know each other, I liked his energy and effort. I liked the direction it seemed to be going to the point my girlfriends had to tell me not to run from him. Because every part of me wanted to run from something that seemed normal.
I liked what he was coming with until I became uncomfortable with my own feelings, and I didn’t know how to communicate them to him.
With that said, I knew if I truly wanted to experience the truest of loves, a reciprocal, requited love, and be in a healthy relationship this story had to come to a pause. What I didn’t know was that he was going to show me things I didn’t know I needed to work on. I didn’t know he inadvertently was going to help me continue to heal parts of me that were hidden.
As someone who has learned to self-heal, I am no longer the type that runs from herself. I am here for the growth.
The truth is I am emotionally detached from myself, and I am not actively dating at the moment. I am the one that has to work on herself. My reiki healer called it, too – she told me this year would not be a year for a relationship, but a year of continuous growth. And now I see why. After all the healing work I have done thus far – I am an unemotional mess. How?
At my big age of 39, I struggle to communicate my wants and needs.
I still struggle to communicate and process uncomfortable feelings. I would rather give myself anxiety, act nonchalantly, emotionally react, and choose non-communication when I am bothered with someone than address the issue (I will later explain why). I have been ignoring my feelings for so long it has become a habit, a defense mechanism, and more so a trauma response.
If you are someone like me who grew up in a household that didn’t discuss feelings, your emotional needs were unmet, and you don’t feel safe to share your feelings – emotional detachment is quite common.
Oftentimes, we always talk about men being emotionally unavailable, but what if it’s a woman who is emotionally unavailable or emotionally detached? How does she navigate herself, dating, or being in a relationship? As I navigate my emotions this season, let’s explore what it means to be emotionally detached, the signs of detachment, and how to reconnect with yourself emotionally.
Emotional Unavailability vs. Emotional Detachment
When we look at the terminology emotional unavailability and emotional detachment, one might argue that the two terms are interchangeable and have the same meaning. One could also argue that both terms mean that some people are not in tune with their emotions or lack the emotional capacity to be responsive to someone else’s emotions. Fair enough. However, there is a big difference. The definition of emotional unavailability is described as people who have difficulty with sharing their emotions and being receptive to the emotions of those around them.
According to Verywell Mind, signs of emotional unavailability can look like being distant or cold, lack of closeness, and emotional intimacy in relationships, inability to understand and relate to others’ feelings, defensiveness when asked to change or let others in, tendency to shut down or avoid topics that require emotional openness, or withdrawal from people or situations that provoke emotional reactions.
GIF by Kim's ConvenienceGiphyWhereas emotional detachment is defined as the inability to or willingness to connect with others on an emotional level. Furthermore, Psychology Today states emotional detachment can also mean that people do not engage with their feelings. Exhibit A – me. Emotional detachment has various causes – past neglect, childhood or adult trauma, PTSD, depression, personality disorder, bipolar disorder, substance abuse, or, in some cases, medication (i.e. antidepressants). It is important to note emotional detachment is a complex issue. For someone like me, it’s a coping mechanism.
It is easier for me to ignore uncomfortable feelings to protect myself from stress or getting hurt. Hence, my nonchalant demeanor. It is also true for some people it is a reaction to trauma, abuse, and unprocessed emotions. Exhibit B – me. As it is difficult for me to open up about my feelings at the moment. On the contrary – emotional detachment can be helpful in navigating some situations like listening to people’s opinions and gossip.
Unfortunately, emotional detachment is not a behavior that can be turned on and off at will. Please note that emotional detachment is NOT a mental health diagnosis but can be a symptom of a mental health condition such as an attachment disorder. And if you know anything about attachment theory, it is related to the relationship we develop in our childhood with our primary caregivers.
Signs You're Emotionally Detached
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According to Psychology Today and Verywell Mind, general signs of emotional detachment can look like difficulty showing empathy to others, sharing emotions, committing to a relationship, feeling numb, poor listening skills, lack of self-esteem, preferring to be alone, struggling to feel positive emotions, inability to identify emotions, lack of physical, verbal, or sexual contact and losing touch with people or maintaining connections.
In a romantic relationship, emotional detachment shows up as you or your partner not being available for connection, poor communication, or reduced affection.
For me, my experience with emotional detachment is collective. I am an empath to my core. I don’t have a problem relating to other’s feelings or circumstances. I don’t have commitment issues, nor do I have an issue connecting with others or maintaining those connections. I struggle with sharing emotions, at least the negative ones.
Due to the emotional abuse from my childhood and a toxic relationship, I learned sharing emotions just wasn't the safe thing to do. As a survivor of trauma, I learned to suppress feeling negative emotions in general as a form of protection.
How To Reconnect To Your Emotions When You're Emotionally Unavailable
Serious Kid Cudi GIF by Apple MusicGiphyExploring my emotional side in-depth started late last year simply by noticing my reaction to something that he did. I didn’t know how to properly communicate to him how I was feeling or what he did bothered me in the moment. So, I swallowed my feelings and said absolutely nothing. I intentionally chose to avoid the issue. I chose to rationalize the situation instead of acknowledging that my feelings at the time were valid. I chose to act like everything was all good because it was all good.
“It wasn’t that deep to begin with” is what I told myself. And this is where the problem lies.
The saying is true, “What happens in your childhood shows up in your adult relationships.” I came to realize that because I was not able to express my feelings as a child, I struggled to process them. I either hold back my feelings, take a long time to say how I feel, or don’t say anything at all. This is because I fear people will walk away from me like my mother did if I share what I truly feel. I fear my feelings won’t be validated, or they will be rejected.
With that said, I was completely unaware that I was emotionally detached from myself until recently. So, here we are with this article. It all started by reading Instagram’s @theholisticpsychologist, Dr. Nicole LePera’s newest book How to Be the Love You Seek: Break Cycles, Find Peace, and Heal Your Relationships, which was released on November 28, 2023. As I read through the first chapter, I became triggered.
How Dr. LePera describes her childhood with her parents and experiences with her romantic partners somewhat mirrored my experiences with my own parents and relationships. As Dr. LaPera stated in her book, I have no issue showing up for others or meeting their needs and wants. But when it comes to expressing my own needs and wants – I cannot or I don’t. This is mainly due to my hyper-independence.
At an early age, I learned to show up for myself because the people I trusted to show up for me failed. Given my home environment, I had internalized it is not safe to talk about feelings. I never knew my emotional responses and behavior were abnormal. But because I am willing to continue to do my inner work, I know that I can reconnect to my emotions, and undo four decades of repressed emotions.
If you are someone like me who struggles with emotional connection with yourself and others, here is how you go about it:
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1. Know Your Attachment Style
For me, the first step was to understand my attachment style. I asked my therapist if she could help me identify my attachment style to understand my triggers. She recommended The Attachment Theory Workbook by Annie Chen, LMFT. My therapist administered the associated online quiz – Attachment Quiz. If you haven’t figured out my attachment style yet by reading this article, I have an anxious attachment style.
This means I don’t do well with inconsistent behavior, especially from men (but I’m the type that holds men to standards too). People with an anxious attachment style have a need to feel close to their partner. It may come across as “clingy” or “needy.” However, this same need is often driven by fear of abandonment, mistrust, and low self-esteem. I would say knowing your attachment style is helpful because you can work towards having a secure attachment style (with practice) in your relationships – familial, business, work, platonic, or romantic.
2. Become Self-Aware
Most people who are not in the practice of self-care or self-healing are unaware of their triggers, patterns, and behaviors. We are so caught up in the daily minutiae of life that we forget to pay attention to the most important part of our days — ourselves. As Dr. LePera says, make it a conscious habit to pause throughout your day to check in with yourself. Ask yourself:
- How does my body feel?
- What am I doing right now?
- Am I present?
- Am I distracted and lost with other thoughts?
- What do I think or feel when I recall a specific experience with someone?
- What do I think or worry about?
- What would happen if I shared my authentic thoughts, perspective, feelings right now?”
This is what Dr. LePera refers to as exploring your embodied self or fulfilling your authentic needs in chapter two of her book. Consistent mindfulness and self-awareness are key to self-discovery and in any healing journey. Learning to focus on the present moment also includes paying attention to our emotional response to an event or how we think about emotions in general.
3. Practice Vulnerability
The idea of vulnerability is a tough one for me and so many other women for countless reasons. Whether it be toxic family, friendships, relationships, or trauma – trusting others with your thoughts and feelings is not easy. As much as I am open and transparent, I am not as vulnerable. And I believe there is so much power in the duality to be both. To trust someone, let alone a man with your authentic self is a delicate matter.
But it is emotional vulnerability that allows us humans to build authentic connections, create stronger relationships, and break down emotional walls. Emotional vulnerability is not something to be rushed – it takes time and practice from you and the people you choose to have in your life. Medical News Today suggests that we can learn to be vulnerable by opening up more to our closest friends, building our ability to become more trusting, and developing skills to regulate our emotions.
4. Seek Therapy
I have been in therapy for six years and counting. I would consider therapy one of my safe spaces. I am one of those individuals who recommend therapy to everyone as it has given me the tools and resources I need to navigate my life challenges. By choosing to get help, I was able to put my PTSD and depression in remission for four years now. I have also learned how to manage my anxiety.
I am fully aware that in this season of my life requires me to do the work to unlock new levels of self. And any time where I have consciously chosen growth – the universe or life has not failed me. I was able to heal my body, my heart, and my spirit. Now, it’s time to heal my inner child, this hurt little girl who lives in me.
I will say choosing a therapist is similar to dating; you might go through a few potentials until you find a therapist you connect with. Actually, one of my lifelong friends said to me the other day, “Your relationship with your therapist is one of the most important relationships in your life.” I needed her to say that, and I needed to hear it because it’s true. You are essentially trusting a licensed stranger to help you navigate your life on so many levels.
Be picky and ask the questions. Cut the cord at the first red flag given. Again, let me reiterate that emotional detachment is not a mental health diagnosis. It can be treated with the help of a therapist. Emotional detachment only becomes a problem when it starts to interfere with your daily life. Pay attention to changes in your daily behavior and make decisions to cope accordingly.
I am genuinely excited about reconnecting with my emotions. I want to feel all the feels – good, bad, and indifferent. I want to cry all the tears – especially the sad ones. I want to process and release negative emotions. I want to say how I feel in the moment with no fear.
If you are that girl who struggles with emotional connection or thinks you're emotionally detached, I hope that you become willing to face your inner child and show up for her. Don’t run – she has been waiting for you.
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