Exclusive: Jay Ellis Shares ‘Full-Circle’ Moment With His Parents & His Self-Care Ritual
While Jay Ellis’ claim to fame is starring in Insecure as Lawrence, the 40-year-old actor racked up many acting credits prior to and after the iconic series. He starred in The Game and currently, he’s promoting his new film Top Gun: Maverick where he plays the character Payback. The role could be considered a full-circle moment for the actor since he was a military brat.
Jay’s father was in the Air Force and they moved around a lot. In an interview with SSENSE, he revealed that he attended 12 schools in 13 years. Due to his successful career, he has been able to give back to his parents who had him when they were teenagers. Jay was a keynote speaker at CultureCon in Atlanta earlier this month and he spoke with xoNecole about the sweet gift he bought his parents for their wedding anniversary.
“I remember the first time I bought my parents cars this year for their 40th wedding anniversary and that to me felt like a full-circle moment,” he said. “I don’t know if I ever really thought about it before then but that to me was just this moment of like, 'Oh I can do this for my family. I’m excited to do this and proud to do this for them.' And that was huge.”
The former model is also a huge proponent of self-care. While there is a community on social media that believes “sleep is for the weak,” Jay has no qualms about prioritizing eight hours of sleep a night.
“I get eight hours of sleep no matter what. Always. If I gotta go to bed at 8 o’clock at night that’s what I gotta do I don't care,” he said. But he also enjoys his quiet time and explains how that has helped him over time. “Whether that’s meditation, whether it’s prayer, whether it’s a walk. I go on a walk pretty much every single morning for like 45 minutes,” he said.
“I wake up early before I gotta go to work before I gotta get ready for work to go on a walk just to have some quiet time and to me that’s been super helpful. I think it’s helped with my energy and endurance but I think even also decision making and all the things coming at you so fast. I feel like it’s really helpful to be able to have a moment to step away from all of that and get back to get grounded.”
It may be surprising to know that the NAACP Image award-winning actor manages to get eight hours of sleep and finds quiet time now that he’s a father. Jay welcomed a baby girl in 2020 and in an interview with Essence that same year, he noted the exhaustion with balancing work and becoming a new father.
“Then I was directing and then becoming a father. I was back and forth to New Orleans every week, and I was just so exhausted that God was like, You need to sit down, and this is the week to do it.”
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Featured image by Derek White/Getty Images for Paramount Pictures
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Why We'll Probably Never Hear Lupita Nyong'o Share Her Relationship With The World
Lupita Nyong'o is sharing a transparent look into her life after a recent breakup.
In a cover story for NET-A-PORTER, the A Quiet Place: Day One star shed light on the significant heartbreak she experienced following the end of her relationship with ex-boyfriend and TV host, Selema Masekela.
As a public figure, Nyong'o, 39, sought to divulge the news of the breakup in hopes of presenting a more authentic perspective on the pain that follows a separation.
"I was living in a lot of pain and heartbreak," she told the publication. "I looked at the environment of my social media and thought I don’t want to be a part of this illusion that everything is always coming up roses. Surely there is a lesson for me to learn in this, and I just want to be real about it."
The Black Panther star went on to explain that her choice to be transparent with her fans about her breakup came from the certainty she felt after ending the relationship. “In my mind, when I shared my relationship status with the world, it was because I felt sure about it,” she said.
While she didn’t know how the news would land with her fans, she found relief in knowing she wasn’t alone in her experience.
“I knew how it could be interpreted; I knew it would have a life of its own,” she reflects. “But then I started to see the comments and people were being so loving and supportive. The ones that moved me the most were other people sharing their pain and their heartbreak.”
Nyong'o and Masekela went Instagram official in December 2022, publicly announcing their relationship in a couple's video. In October 2023, Nyong'o took to her personal Instagram account to share the news of her breakup in her caption, writing, "At this moment, it is necessary for me to share a personal truth and publicly dissociate myself from someone I can no longer trust.”
She continued the vulnerable note, "I find myself in a season of heartbreak because of a love suddenly and devastatingly extinguished by deception. I am tempted to run into the shadows and hide, only to return to the light when I have regained my strength enough for me to say, 'Whatever, my life is better this way.' But I am reminded that the magnitude of the pain I am feeling is equal to the measure of my capacity for love."
These days, Nyong'o tells NET-A-PORTER that she is prioritizing profound self-discovery that extends beyond her career. She notes having a deliberate and unhurried approach to understanding herself.
She also alludes to keeping her relationships private moving forward after noting it was "very, very sage" of her not to talk about her private life professionally in the days before her last relationship. "I'm going back to those days by the way," Nyong'o shares of her reinstated boundaries around her personal life.
Earlier this month, Nyong'o made headlines alongside her new boyfriend actor Joshua Jackson. Nyong'o and Jackson went through public splits from their respective SOs in October 2023, with the latter splitting from his long-time partner Jodie Turner-Smith following her divorce filing from the Dawson's Creek alum.
The pair have been spotted together as early as December 2023, but nothing screamed "couple" quite as loudly as their recent getaway to Mexico for Nyong'o's 41st birthday featuring passionate displays of affection.
"Our purpose in life is to love. And so you have to get back in it," she tells the outlet, seemingly alluding to her budding new romance.
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Featured image by Taylor Hill/Getty Images