

The Eclipse Season saga continues into this month along with the Retrograde party. The month ahead continues to find us challenging what we've known as the truth as facades come crumbling down. This is a time in which we're encouraged to tune into our intuition instead of making decisions on what is presented to us. Sometimes the truth is a tough, but necessary, pill to swallow.
As sobering as this month can be, Venus comes through with the love assist to soothe us after experiencing some much-needed reality checks. Remember--we're all going through a lot of changes right now so be kind to yourself and others. Instead of feeding into the divisiveness, lean into our shared humanity.
Check out how your zodiac sign is affected in the month ahead!
Aries
The beginning of the month has you focused on home and family matters, Aries. However, duty calls as it pertains to your career challenging you to find that much-needed work-life balance. The New Moon Solar Eclipse invites you to assess your inner dialogue and the way you communicate with others. Mental limitations that restrict you from living and expressing your truth are dissolving with this lunation.
When Mars enters Leo, you've got the confidence to not only talk the talk but to walk the walk as well.
On the 14th, the Saturn-Uranus square could bring a reality check regarding your finances and long-term goals. The following week, the Sun enters Cancer, motivating you to do absolutely nothing but stay at home. On the 22nd, Mercury goes direct which helps you move a project into the next phase. The Full Moon on the 24th highlights an achievement of yours. June wraps up on a high note with Venus entering Leo, inspiring you to shine your light!
Taurus
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June begins with Venus sweetening up your tongue. As the saying goes, "You'll catch more flies with honey." The New Moon Solar Eclipse on the 10th invites you to dive deeper into your beliefs about your self-worth and finances. Creating wealth for yourself starts from within. On the 11th, Mars enters Leo encouraging you to rule with love, not an iron fist. Be mindful of how much energy you're exerting towards your career goals around the 14th.
Prioritize time to decompress and do something just for you.
When Jupiter Retrograde meets up with the Sun in Cancer on the 20th, spend some time nurturing your dreams. Speak life into your future and surround yourself with supportive friends. On the 22nd, Mercury goes direct which helps you get back on track financially. The Full Moon on the 24th gives you a chance to be recognized for your contributions to your community. During Neptune's six-month Retrograde, you're invited to gain more clarity about the greater impact you want to have on society and how your tribe can help you achieve your mission. When Venus enters Leo on the 27th, indulge your inner child with some much-needed play time.
Gemini
Your values, finances, and material assets could use some TLC when Venus enters Cancer at the top of the month, Gemini. The New Moon Solar Eclipse on the 10th brings sweeping changes to at least one area of your life. Life as you know it may be moving in a completely different direction but it's exactly what your soul ordered to experience more growth. When Mars enters Leo on the 11th, your energy is bursting through the seams, making this the perfect time to get any busy work done--especially those tasks you've been putting off. Around the 14th, be mindful of others challenging your spiritual beliefs.
Your path isn't meant to be understood by everyone.
On the 20th, Jupiter goes Retrograde, inviting you to dive deeper into your career preparation. The Sun shifts into Cancer on the same day, encouraging you to nurture your hidden gifts and talents. When Mercury goes direct on the 22nd, you're feeling a lot more sociable than you have been this month. The Full Moon on the 24th exposes the truth about someone in a position of power or influence. Throughout Neptune Retrograde, you'll be able to see through illusions a lot more clearly. On the 27th, Venus enters Leo, motivating you to seize new opportunities that require you to be front and center stage.
Cancer
The month begins with Venus pouring in the blessings once she enters your sign on the 2nd, Cancer. The New Moon Solar Eclipse invites you to shed the final layers of a fear that has held you back from expressing more of your true essence. When Mars enters Leo, you're motivated to get the bag in some ways that align more with your current value, making this a supportive time to renegotiate existing contracts and agreements. Be mindful of clashing egos within your friend group around the 14th.
Challenge yourself to hold space for differing perspectives and experiences to cultivate deeper intimacy within your connections.
On the 20th, Jupiter Retrograde meets up with the Sun in Cancer which is a good time to dive deeper into research, studying, and writing. When Mercury goes direct on the 22nd, your intuitive insights become more clear, granting you the confidence you need to move forward in a new direction. The Full Moon on the 24th could have you dissolving a contract or partnership that doesn't align with your long-term goals. During Neptune Retrograde, which kicks off on the 25th, you're invited to restore your connection with your Higher Self. The month ends with Venus entering Leo, making you a magnet for good fortune and expansive opportunities that give you the opportunity to shine!
Leo
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Take it easy on yourself this month. With Venus entering Cancer, your energy may not be up to par. Get your rest and take lots of cat naps. On the 10th, the New Moon Solar Eclipse reveals how out of alignment some of your friendships are. Avoid getting caught up in gossip and handle this matter with maturity so you don't f*ck up your karma. When Mars enters Leo, you're feeling rejuvenated and ready to take on the world. On the 14th, be mindful of power struggles with an employer or someone in a position of authority.
Choose your battles wisely.
On the 20th, Jupiter begins its retrograde, giving you a chance to dive deeper within yourself for some much-needed soul-searching. On the same day, the Sun enters Cancer, inviting you back into your cozy cocoon to prepare for your birthday season. When Mercury goes direct on the 22nd, you're able to clear up confusion and misunderstandings amongst your tribe. The Full Moon in Capricorn reveals a habit of yours that is detrimental to your well-being. Work-life balance is the key to supporting your health. The month ends with Venus entering your sign bringing the birthday blessings in a little early.
Virgo
The beginning of the month brings your attention to your friends, social network, and your hopes and dreams, Virgo. On the 10th, the New Moon Solar Eclipse invites you to free yourself from the expectations of others by defining what your truth is separate from those that you've placed on a pedestal. When Mars enters Leo, be mindful of repressed anger bubbling to the surface. You may think you're mad at one thing when in actuality there's something deeper to explore internally. The Saturn-Uranus square on the 14th has you feeling at odds with your responsibilities and your growing desire for freedom.
When Jupiter goes retrograde on the 20th, you're encouraged to get into some self-reflection to gain a better understanding of repetitive, and undesirable, relationship dynamics.
On the same day, the Sun enters Cancer, making this a good time to nurture your connections with like-minded people. Everything starts getting more clear when Mercury goes direct on the 22nd, giving you the momentum you need to move forward with your career goals. The Full Moon on the 24th illuminates the intentions of a casual romantic interest. This is a make it or break it moment to determine whether you should continue to invest your time. During Neptune Retrograde, the rose-colored glasses come off and you're seeing others for who they truly are, not who you want them to be. The month wraps up with Venus teaming up with Mars requiring you to keep your ego in check.
Libra
Libra
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The pressure is on in matters of career and reputation but if anyone can rise to the occasion it's you, Libra. The New Moon Solar Eclipse on the 10th supports you in dissolving thought-patterns that don't support your greatness. Speak life into you and your dreams! On the 11th, Mars enters Leo which could bring out the competitive side amongst you and some friends.
Avoid the drama and channel that motivation towards accomplishing your goals.
A secret about a love interest can be revealed around the 14th which could either strengthen the relationship or end it. Jupiter goes retrograde on the 20th, inviting you to take better care of your physical health which could mean addressing some of your escapist or over-indulgent tendencies. On the same day, the Sun enters Cancer, motivating you to make some boss moves. When Mercury goes direct on the 22nd, any delayed travel plans are finally moving forward. The Full Moon on the 24th brings a home or family matter to the head for resolution. June wraps up with Venus entering Leo to soften the intensity and increase the playful energy amongst your tribe.
Scorpio
Scorpio
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The beginning of the month kicks off with Venus entering Cancer which has you attracting some loyal followers that want to soak up the gems of wisdom you have to share. On the 11th, the New Moon Solar Eclipse invites you to transform your mindset, which ultimately transforms your life. When Mars enters Leo, you're motivated to overcome any challenges standing between you and your career goals. Family and home matters can come to a head around the 14th--possibly leading you to consider a relocation if you're feeling too restricted.
On the 20th, Jupiter Retrograde meets up with the Sun in Cancer, making this a good time to dive deeper into your creative process through some extensive research and study.
Remember that practice makes perfect (or at least close enough to it). When Mercury goes direct on the 22nd, your vision becomes all the more clear now that you're no longer bogged down by past disappointments and heartaches. The Full Moon in Capricorn on the 24th supports you in resolving any discord with your siblings or other close relations. When Neptune goes Retrograde, be prepared to revisit your childhood and past dating experiences with a more grounded perspective. The month wraps up with Venus entering Leo, making you a magnet for opportunity and recognition.
Sagittarius
Sagittarius
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June starts off on a quiet note with Venus entering Cancer inviting you to enjoy some privacy with the people you're closest to. In matters of love, things are getting deeper between you and bae. The New Moon Solar Eclipse on the 10th supports you in wrapping up a karmic cycle in your relationships. The old way no longer works for you and you're ready to experience the kind of connections you really want. When Mars enters Leo, you're ready to get another stamp in your passport, making this a good time to plan a summer getaway.
You may be feeling at war within yourself around the 14th due to a growing need for more spontaneity and less structure.
On the 20th, Jupiter Retrograde begins encouraging you to connect with the wisdom of your ancestors. On the same day, the Sun enters Cancer, which has you feeling more lowkey than usual. When Mercury goes direct on the 22nd, you're more clear about where you stand within some of your most important relationships. Signing new contracts is now supported as well. The Full Moon in Capricorn on the 24th helps you resolve a financial blockage. On the 25th, Neptune goes Retrograde, helping you see through the disillusionment of your family. Some hard truths may have to be accepted during this transit. The month comes to a close with Venus in Leo, elevating your social platform.
Capricorn
Capricorn
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The month begins with your relationships taking up much of your attention while Venus transits through Cancer. The New Moon Solar Eclipse on the 10th empowers you to kick a bad habit. Remember--it's mind over matter. On the 11th, Mars enters Leo, encouraging you to be mindful of your temper. Random outbursts are likely if you're not actively engaging in shadow work. Around the 14th, the Saturn-Uranus square has you feeling torn between indulging in pleasure and pursuing the bag.
On the 20th, Jupiter Retrograde and the Sun in Cancer meet up marking a pivotal time of transforming your relationships by improving your communication skills (which includes being a good listener as well).
On the 22nd, Mercury goes direct which could clear up any confusion and miscommunication regarding your health. This is also a good time to implement your new work strategy and daily routine into effect. The Full Moon on the 24th places the spotlight on you so make the most of the energy. When Neptune goes Retrograde on the 25th, you're getting to the truth within yourself and about the world around you. The month wraps up with Venus entering Leo which could have you attracting some extra support from a financial institution or a benefactor.
Aquarius
Aquarius
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June kicks off with you nurturing your physical vessel when Venus enters Cancer. The New Moon Solar Eclipse on the 11th supports you in healing your inner child. When Mars enters Leo, your relationships get most of your energy. Just be mindful of being too bossy with your loved ones. On the 14th, the Saturn-Uranus square brings some family tension to the surface especially if you're feeling restricted in some way. On the 20th, Jupiter goes Retrograde, encouraging you to revisit your budget and spending habits over the past couple of months. The Sun enters Cancer on the same day, motivating you to tend to your physical health.
On the 22nd, Mercury goes direct, helping you get clear about matters of romance. This is also a good time to move forward with pursuing a new hobby or creative project.
The Full Moon on the 24th helps you break the shackles of disempowerment. You are strong, wise, and incredibly capable of accomplishing whatever you put your mind to. When Neptune goes Retrograde on the 25th, it's time to reel in any excessive spending habits. The month comes to a close with Venus in Leo, helping you attract some generous clients, business partners, and opportunities.
Pisces
June begins with Venus entering Cancer inviting you to indulge in pleasure, creativity, and romance. The New Moon Solar Eclipse on the 10th is transforming the limiting beliefs that you inherited from your family which is a vital part of generational and ancestral healing. When Mars enters Leo, you're motivated to get your body into shape. On the 14th, the Saturn-Uranus square has you pulled between wanting some private time and needing to tend to your daily affairs. When Jupiter begins its Retrograde on the 20th you'll have plenty of time to enjoy your solitude and some soul-searching. On the same day, the Sun enters Cancer inviting you to explore a hobby or do something creative.
Self-expression is key throughout this transit.
On the 22nd, Mercury goes direct, making it a good time to move forward with any property investment, relocation or renovation plans. The Full Moon on the 24th has your social media presence poppin', making this a good time to launch that new product, website, etc. During Neptune Retrograde, you'll be getting more clear about yourself and how you may have been slightly disillusioned about something (or someone) in your life. The month wraps up with Venus in Leo, motivating you to streamline your efforts in work.
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Laterras R. Whitfield On What He Wants In A 'Future Wifey' & Redefining Masculinity
In this week's episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker chopped it up with Laterras R. Whitfield, host of the Dear Future Wifey podcast, for a raw and revealing conversation about personal growth, faith, and the search for love in a way that resonates.
Laterras Whitfield Believes Men Should Pursue, Not Persuade
“Let me know you exist, and I’ll do the rest”
Whitfield is a big advocate of a man’s role in going confidently for the woman he wants. “Men should pursue, not persuade, and women should present, not pursue,” he said. He’s open to meeting women on social media but isn’t a fan of bold approaches. “Don’t shoot your shot at me. … Let me know you exist, and I’ll do the rest.”
His ideal woman?
“She has to be a woman of God… I judge a woman by how her friends see her… and most importantly, how she treats my kids.”
Infidelity, Redemption, and the Power of Self-Control
“Being disciplined is the most beautiful thing you can offer”
Once unfaithful in his previous marriage, Whitfield has since transformed his perspective on masculinity. “Being disciplined is the most beautiful thing you can offer. That’s what true masculinity is to me now.” He has also committed to abstinence, choosing self-control as a defining trait of manhood.
Whitfield’s journey is one of redemption, purpose, and faith—something that speaks to women who value emotional intelligence, accountability, and the power of transformation.
Rewriting the Narrative Around Black Masculinity
What masculinity, legacy, and healing mean to Whitfield today
“My dad taught me what not to be [as a man] and my mom taught me what she needed [in a man],” Whitfield said. While his father wasn’t abusive, he wasn’t emotionally or affectionately present. “Since I didn’t see it, I never got it either… I would look at my dad and say, ‘I want to be a better father.’ ”
Adoption had always been on his spirit, influenced by TV shows like Different Strokes and Punky Brewster. This mindset led him to take in his nephew as his son after a powerful dream confirmed what he already felt in his heart.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
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If there is a piece of consistent sex-related advice that I give people who are considering going the distance in their relationship, it’s this: “Don’t go for someone who is simply good in bed; you’d be far better off choosing someone who actually enjoys sex.” Why do I say that? Because I’ve been doing this couples-work thing long enough to know that there are a lot — and, I mean A LOT — of people who like to manipulate or weaponize sex in order to get something that they want…and then, once they get it, suddenly sex is not a priority anymore.
One day, I might really get into just how actually evil that is (because sex is never supposed to be a bribe in a relationship). For now, though, I want to talk about how motives reveal oh so very much when it comes to physical (and even emotional) intimacy. Hmph. It reminds me of one of my favorite quotes on the topic of motives: “People’s behavior makes sense when you think about it in terms of goals, needs, and motives.” An author by the name of Thomas Mann said that, and indeed it does because, when you are doing something merely to get your way, that is a form of manipulation or control.
On the other hand, when you’re doing it merely for the holistic pleasure of doing so — that is when you are experiencing intimacy in the way that it was intended to be.
So, when it comes to your personal motive for sex, what is it really all about?
What Are You Really Hoping to Get Out of Sex?
When It Comes to Your ‘What’, You Always Need to Know Your WHY
Oh, I’ve got some more motives quotes for you. Psychologist Albert Ellis once said, “People have motives and thoughts of which they are unaware.” Author Paul David Trip once said, “We rarely do anything with one single motive.” It’s pretty ironic that actor Chris Noth (because if you know, you know) once said, “Since women ask me about male motives all the time, I can offer a bit of advice. If you feel like you're going to get hurt, then you shouldn't be there in the first place. That's the way I look at relationships.”
Now, before I attempt to build on these quotes, let’s first look at a very basic definition of motive:
Motive: a reason for doing something, especially one that is hidden or not obvious
Did you catch that? Oftentimes, when someone is moving based on a motive, the reason is hidden. Is it just me or does that sound semi-sneaky or opportunistic, right off the bat? Interestingly enough, some synonyms for motive include grounds, basis and root. All of those words make me think of the foundation of something. So, since we are talking about sex, specifically, today — before you decide to sleep with someone, you really should ask yourself what your foundational reason is and, if you’re choosing not to share it with said-partner…why is that?
Pick Your Top 3 Motives, Then Reflect
Let’s keep going. Some other synonyms for motive include aim; emotion; idea; impulse; intent; motivation; passion; rationale; occasion; incentive; consideration, and inspiration. Aight, so here’s another thing to ponder — out of these 12 words, select your top three that “connect the dots” as it relates to your motive (or motives). It could be that you feel passion for him, your intent is to show him that and, since you’ve been dating for a hot minute, you think that it’s the right occasion. In this case, what’s shady or opportunistic about that?
If that is indeed your motive, it would fall less into the “hidden” category and more in the “not obvious” once you really thought it through. On the other hand, if it’s more like you aim to have sex, because your rationale is to get some sort of incentive out of it — do you see how that’s totally different? And if indeed that is the case, WHY do you think that is okay?
Sex Is Not A Transaction — It’s An Exchange
I’m telling you, if there is one thing that I damn near loathe is how transactional sex sounds these days: “Unless you’re going to pay my bills, I’m not going to give you any.” What in the world? Listen, I don’t care how unpopular the opinion may be, sometimes — hell, oftentimes — the truth isn’t popular and the truth about copulation is IT IS AN EVEN EXCHANGE. No one should be paying you for it. He got pleasure, you got pleasure. Over and out. And if that isn’t happening, either there is more communication that needs to be going on (which is just one of the reasons why I’m not a fan of faking orgasms) or there is something “off” when it comes to you and your partner.
Whatever the case may be, before engaging in physical intimacy with someone, it’s beyond wise to spend some time getting really honest with yourself about what your motives truly are — because how we start something oftentimes sets the tone for the experience overall. Indeed, motives are a lot like cause and effect — they play a significantly profound role in determining the outcome of matters.
Real Compatibility Includes Mutual Motives
Sexual Compatibility Includes Having Mutual Motives
Okay, so now that we’ve discussed motives, in general — say that your motives are pure (and you are being really honest with yourself about that). You’re not hiding anything because there is nothing to hide. You simply feel so connected to someone that you are motivated and inspired to take things to another level.
Well, that’s where author Lebo Grand and something that he once said comes in: “Sensuality is the purest motive that exists on earth.” When something is sensual, it gratifies the senses. When something is sensual, it arouses the appetite — and yes, when you want to be intimate with someone, simply because you want to get closer to them, there is something that is very sweet, very sincere and even pure — in the sense of being authentic and real — about that.
If that is your motive, share that with your partner. If that is also his motive, then it’s time to get into what the mutual motives of what a healthy sexual relationship should be: pleasure, joy and satisfaction. Y’all, something else that messes many couples up is there is so much focus on what they want to get out of sex that they fail to fully tune in and tap into their partner — and that is unfortunate. You know why? Because it has been both my experience as well as my observation that when both people are totally invested in making sure that their partner is sexually satisfied both individuals end up feeling gratified and quenched. Yeah, a selfish motive rarely brings contentment like a selfless one does — and you can take that to the bank!
And that is why, although I think that sexual compatibility is important, you’d be amazed how much clear communication, patience and selflessness can “get you there” if sex seems awkward at first. Again, if the motives are right, goodness can come from it, even if it takes a bit of time and effort to get there.
When Your Sexual Motives Shift, Say Something
If Your Motives Shift, You Need to Speak Up
Final point. It is the Greek philosopher Heraclitus who once said, “Change is the only constant in life” and this applies to every aspect of it — including sex. That said, some of you may recall back when I wrote an article entitled, “BDE: Please Let The 'It Needs To Be Huge' Myth Go.” The wife who I featured in that piece, we were recently talking about it and how she remains 10 toes down about the fact that a “big one” ain’t all it’s cracked up to be if the man who owns it is attached to a huge ego and not much else.
When I asked her to reflect on how much of her dissatisfaction was — and kinda still is — about him vs. who she now is as a person, she admitted that so much of who she is has changed from when they first got together. She’s older and so her hormones have shifted. She has spiritually evolved and so a profound emotional connection is more desired. She knows herself better and so she has some sexual needs that she never had before. And so, her motives have shifted from pretty much just having a good time (only) to longing for something…deeper.
This isn’t abnormal; many people go through this. Thing is, instead of being forthcoming with their partner, they would rather have them pick up on hints or, even worse, attempt to read their mind. Yeah, that’s not how effective communication works, y’all — if your motives for sex have changed, you’ve got to say something. Otherwise, you’re going to end up frustrated or unfulfilled…and honestly, your partner probably will too because if you are different and you don’t share it, eventually there will be a “disconnect” (and not just in the bedroom).
____
As I bring this to a close, take a moment to circle back to the first motive quote that I shared in the intro (“People’s behavior makes sense when you think about it in terms of goals, needs and motives.”). Whatever your sex life is like right now, what are your goals, needs and motives? What are his?
Figure that out and you’ll better understand where you’re at and, if you don’t like it, how to get to where you want to be.
It all begins with the right motives, sis. It really and truly does.
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