I am no stranger to my money "being funny," being "broke as a joke," and struggling to survive until my next paycheck.
I have been through it all: the negative checking account, having to beg for some money to eat, losing my entire retirement savings, trying to pay rent with no income, which had me almost homeless, and creditors trying to bust down my door every chance they got.
There I was in a new city, feeling the crappiest I've ever felt about myself. I had hit a rock bottom that shook my core forever (both good and bad). My financial situation had me believing that I was worth nothing; my self-esteem and confidence were at an all-time low. It impacted me so much that I had to go seek professional help and talk to a therapist, only to be diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder. All I did during that time was eat, sleep, and cry.
Looking back on that time, I've realized how my self-worth and the way I viewed myself had a direct impact on the way that I managed my coins (as well as income potential). Because I was so down, I had no desire to take control of my finances and ultimately, I allowed things to spiral out of control. I was ducking and dodging phone calls from bill collectors, scared to open my mail, and just in complete denial about the state I was in.
I was a MESS. The messiest of messes, if you ask me.
The way that we manage our money, as well as how much we make, can be directly tied to how we view and value ourselves.
Your self-worth plays a major role in your financial wellness; your thoughts, feelings, and emotions dictate how you behave with money whether positive or negative. Those individuals who think highly of themselves usually have no problem going out there and securing the bag because they know how to capitalize on opportunities. It's inevitable for them to be successful because they believe in themselves to make it happen.
When you struggle with low self-esteem, it's hard to believe in your abilities to obtain financial success.
That stinkin' thinkin' creeps in and shuts everything down! The reality here is this: the more you see yourself as worthy and really value yourself, then the more you'll be able to manage your coins with ease and turn your financial situation around. Things turned around for me once I gained clarity and changed the way that I thought about myself and money…
My poor spending habits changed.
I stopped living paycheck to paycheck.
I started saving.
I made wiser decisions.
My life literally changed forever as a result of a simple mindset shift. Here's a few ways that I personally built my self-esteem and started valuing myself more so that I could become a better steward over my finances. You have the power to do it too.
Get to know yourself.
Do you have a good sense of self-awareness? When you have a better understanding of yourself, you are empowered to make those necessary changes that you desire, as well as build on your strengths. You have to understand that your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors have an impact on your quality of life. Take some time to understand what your needs and desires are, your habits, and everything else that makes you tick. Journaling is a good tool for this!
Write a list of good things about yourself daily.
Each day, you should be taking out a few moments to reflect on the positive in your life. This list can be anything from a recent achievement, something you admire about yourself, or anything else that you've noticed about yourself. You should be looking back on these lists often, especially when you're not feeling the greatest.
Stop comparing yourself to others.
I've been guilty of this, but what I've come to realize is that I am who I am for a reason, and my journey is mine and mine alone. If you often compare yourself to others, it'll have you feeling less than. We're all great at something; determine what your strengths are and stop focusing on what Keisha and them on Instagram are doing.
Make sure your support system is on fleek.
Nothing will keep you down more than hanging out with a group of old negative Nancys. Some people fail to realize how much of an impact our close family and friends have on us personally. You need to surround yourself with people that speak positively and uplift and encourage you. Only hang out with those that give off positive vibes!
Redefine failure and stop aiming for perfection.
Setbacks, obstacles, and failures along the way are bound to happen. You have to be able to acknowledge these failures, learn from them, and keep moving forward. You can't let these setbacks cripple you. No one is perfect, so stop making yourself sick trying to reach this certain level that you never will.
More positive thoughts and self-talk.
There is great power in the tongue. We can speak life or death over our lives. Those negative thoughts and self-talk will have you believing in something that's not true. These things hold you back because you are placing limitations on what you can be and your abilities. You have to challenge these thoughts when they pop up into your head. Each morning when you wake up, say at least one positive thing about yourself. You'll be able to make this a habit over time, which will decrease those negative thoughts that you have.
Focus on those things that you can change and accept those that you can't.
If there are some things that you don't like about yourself that you have control over changing, put your energy into making those changes happen. It's pointless for you to continually dwell on those things that you can't change.
Celebrate yourself.
It's important that you take out the time to celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how small they are. Don't wait for anyone to validate you; you validate yourself! You should be doing taking out the time to do this at least once a month. Do something that you enjoy. Treat yourself to that slice of cheesecake. Take yourself out.
It's going to truly be hard to get your finances in order if you don't take the time to love and value yourself more. The beauty of it all is this: making a decision to take back control over your life and remembering that you can determine the quality of it is the easy part.
Once you make up your mind, you'll be unstoppable.
Featured image by Getty Images
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Kristin Sutton (aka the Money Therapist) is a personal finance and lifestyle blogger/coach over at DebtFreeBlackGirl.com that empowers young women to take control of their finances by changing the way they think about money. As a licensed therapist, her daily mission is to uncover and eliminate the mental roadblocks that hinder people from living the life of their dreams. You can find her on all things social: @DebtFreeBlkGrl
We have less than 40 days left in 2024, and while I'm not one to rush goals just because it's the end of the year, it can be fun to challenge yourself to think about ways you'll close out this year big.
Whether you're planning to meet a certain financial or fitness goal, or you're simply trying to maintain and build on the progress you made this year, having something to look forward to is always a good look. Setting actual goals, according to research, actually leads to more success than just playing things by ear. So here are a few to get you started, sis:
(Disclaimer: Not everything is for everyone, so do like my Granny always says: "Eat the meat. Spit out the bone." Take on five out of the 40 and focus on that for the remainder of the year, or do them all. Either way, this is just to get you started.)
40 Ways To End The Year Strong and Inspired
Money Moves
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1. Increase your retirement (or other savings/investment) contributions by 1%.
Experts have found that you could be leaving money on the table by not upping your contributions when you can.
2. Cancel two to five subscriptions.
You could be missing hundreds, even thousands, of dollars a year due to sneaky price hikes and "updates."
3. Create a "fun" in a high-yield savings account.
This is especially important if you struggle with the dreaded b-word (budget) and will make next year's efforts a lot less intimidating. Even if it's $10 a month, do it.
4. Put on your big-girl panties, and set up automatic transfers and payments for at least one bill.
It reduces the stress of managing bills, lessens the chance of a missed payment---and the fees that come with that---and there can be cost savings for doing so.
5. Invest in a cleaner or housekeeping service.
Bosses who value their time (and mental health) invest their dollars into areas where the time they'd spend doing those tasks themselves could be better used to focus on other money-making projects. (And yes, rest is part of that.) Get a housekeeper, sis, or drop off that laundry, even if it's once per month.
6. Donate to a charity.
Beyond the tax benefits, it's a win-win for the greater good of communities you care about.
7. Review your insurance policies and negotiate a better rate (or move on) before their end dates.
Experts often agree this is a small but mighty step to take each year, especially since insurance rates are competitive, you could be spending more money than you need to (or not enough) and your insurance rates can affect your mortgage payments.
8. Call your loan provider and refinance.
As interest rates fall, “millions of borrowers may be able to refinance and get more affordable payments. As interest rates eased down to 6.5%, about 2.5 million borrowers could already refinance and save at least 75 basis points (0.75%) on their interest rate,” the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau reports. You can also refinance student and other types of loans.
9. Stop buying individual items and stock up via going bulk.
Research has found that, among 30 common products, buying in bulk could save you 27% compared with buying in lower quantities. Water, paper products, and baby products like diapers, toiletries, and garbage bags are the top items where people see the most cost-effectiveness. (This has been a lifesaver for me—children, large family, or not—especially when it comes to toothpaste, deodorant, toilet paper, and feminine hygiene products, saving stress, time, and money.)
10. Go cash-only for the holidays.
If you set smart goals and stick to limits on things like gifts, going out to eat, or groceries, you'll see the benefits of this. Cash-stuffing is one method recommended, but something as simple as taking a $10 bill out for lunch, disabling that card for an hour, and leaving your card in a safe place at the office can give you that mindset jump start to see how far you can take your money without the need to splurge.
Love And Romance
11. Say "no."
There are clear mental and physical health benefits to saying no including the setting of healthy boundaries, creating time and energy for other self-care activities, and protecting yourself from physically harmful situations (i.e. unprotected sex or abuse). Just say it, clearly and simply, when you need to.
12. Set a fun, free, adults-only date night for once a week or twice a month with your spouse.
If busy, high-profile folk have touted the success of this, even you can make the time for quality time with your partner. And it's even better when it costs nothing. The best connections are made doing something chill, challenging, or outside the usual dinner-and-a-movie date. Play a game that allows you to reconnect, take a walk in your neighborhood to chat and laugh, or try a little erotic chocolate/edible liquid/paint episode a la Mea Culpa.
13. Go out with Mr. or Ms. "Not My Type."
I love my man, but if I were waiting out for my "type" at the time, we wouldn't be celebrating seven (going on eight) years together. Sometimes having strict, unrealistic expectations for a spouse (especially related to things like height, physical features, or career path) is what's keeping you alone and lonely.
Take the pressure off and explore all your options. I'm not telling you to stop popping the balloon on the guy who earns $20,000 less than you if that's a hard no that Jesus himself told you to skip. I'm asking you to explore other options and see what else God might have out there for your love journey.
14. Immediately apologize and pray together.
I've learned that always being "right" isn't always ideal when you truly care about someone and you're in a relationship for the long haul. Defaulting to an apology when necessary, even when things aren't 100% resolved, is a good way to prioritize peace and save your energy for more worthwhile battles. Research has even supported the benefits of apologies in relationships, and how couples married for five or more years do it often.
15. Get a Rose and discover true self-love.
Do I really have to explain this? You've gotta know what satisfies you, and how better to figure that out than to practice self-love in the bed by yourself? You can also try this with a partner, but as a woman who got on this train very much later in my sexual activity journey. I have a lot more learning to do on my own, and even in a satisfying relationship, I like to find out new things about myself, by myself.
Figure out what you're into, watch what you want to watch, and read what you want to read to define pleasure for yourself. There's a freedom and empowering element there especially if you're used to prioritizing pleasing your partner.
16. Be direct and have the "money talk" with bae.
Money issues are one of the leading causes of divorce, so you need to have those conversations before you even think about marrying someone. And true, nobody can predict the future so you won't be able to avoid some challenges altogether, however, talking with your potential spouse about how they view money, their spending habits, and the pain points in terms of their approach to money management can at least give you a glimpse into what's in store if you do walk down the aisle, move in with them, or decide to share a bank account/business/child with them.
17. Invest in the "paid" version of that dating app.
I know plenty of successful, married folk who did this and met "the one" as a result. Let's be honest: The free version is for playing around. I had a lot of fun with my "free" profile back in the day, trust me. Upgrade that photo, profile, and package, and see if the quality of your dating adventures changes when you're serious about finding a true partner. Dating coaches and matchmakers cosign this.
18. Solo travel to meet that long-distance connection.
Sometimes, your perfect match isn't within 100 miles of you, and that's okay. Make it an adventure, enjoy the memories, and book that ticket. I met my man this way and it's been a whirlwind escape ever since. If you're not comfortable traveling solo, travel or (network to plan travel) with a group via Facebook.
Career And Business
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19. Schedule coffee or virtual meetups with smart people from your graduating class, previous employer, or current employer.
I have gotten many freelance opportunities by doing this. It's as simple as connecting and offering value (or simply learning how you can better equip yourself to do so.) It's also a great way to expand your network, spark new friendships, or find out about new job opportunities.
20. Invest in a well-made suit.
I don't care what industry you're in, a suit says "power," and it's not as old-school or out-of-style as you'd think. Plus the whole experience of looking for a new one (or getting one tailored) is fun and affirming. Try these options. I swear, anytime I wear a blazer, I'm treated like a celebrity or boss, especially when traveling. I was once upgraded to first-class wearing a yellow blazer outfit, and the airline professional literally said, "You look like somebody important. Here you go."
21. Volunteer for a worthwhile project or cause that's important to your company.
If you're overworked and underappreciated, skip this one, but if you truly have the time, love what you do, and want to advance, this move is clutch. Volunteering for extra projects got me where I am today in media because I had foresight, and knew that was the only way at the time to leverage relationships, and I was able to challenge myself to learn skills that 20 years later are still bankable. That VP you can't get a meeting with will be at that gala your company is planning, so join that committee, sis.
22. Write down why you deserve a raise and ask for it in your next one-on-one.
Gather those receipts (ie sales increase numbers, KPIs met, deals closed, people acquired via recruitment, the impact of systems updates, or other tangible success metrics) and ask for that raise before the first or second-quarter budgets are being finalized.
23. Instead of quitting, write down your exit plan.
While revenge quitting is set to be a thing next year (and maybe you're among those who will be leading the trend), try the better boss move and quit with a real plan.
24. Start automatically separating that estimated self-employed quarterly tax estimate.
If you have side hustles (or you're collecting 1099 income,) baby, you do not want to neglect those quarter tax payments. Talk to a professional, do your research, and set up automatic transfers to an account specifically for paying these at the appropriate due dates.
25. Sign up for a free one- to 11-week course related to your industry—or the industry you want to be in next year.
Institutions like Harvard University and platforms like Coursera offer free courses that can enhance your skills. You can also invest in certificate courses with accredited colleges as well as tech training.
26. Hit "Easy Apply" for 10 dream jobs listed on LinkedIn.
While you shouldn't solely rely on this when actively job-seeking, using this convenient LinkedIn option is a great way to get into the habit of applying for positions. And if you're already employed, you should still be "dating" other employers if you're looking to make a move in the next six months. Keep your interview skills sharp, practice toughening up for the "nos," and get a bit of an ego boost in the process.
Self-Care And Wellness
27. Pre-schedule three month's worth of massages.
Oftentimes this is cost-effective since some spas offer deals for multiple bookings. Also, it makes an act of self-care deliberate and important, not an option. When you get that reminder call, you'll know it's real.
28. Fire that therapist and try another one.
Cultural competency in mental health support is one major problem that can hinder Black women from even bothering with therapy. And who wants the added stress of spending multiple, paid sessions explaining why something is a microaggression? Cut the cord and move on to try someone else, either via a Black women therapists channel or recommendations from others.
29. Join a small group at church.
Bedside service ain't gonna cut it and neither is going to the usual Sunday service. Join a smaller group and upgrade your efforts to connect, network, and elevate spiritually. Even if virtually, take a step to dig a bit deeper with more targeted Bible study and discussions.
30. Say no, even to loved ones.
This is on here twice, for a reason. Saying no is the simplest, most powerful micro-action you can take today to make 2025 better. No explanations. No guilt. Say no.
31. Choose one "luxury" beauty product for skincare and stick to it.
This was trending big on social, especially for millennials hitting their 40s. There's just something so freeing about not giving in to every trend and sticking to the basics that work, especially when there are quality, healthy ingredients involved. Put those orders on auto-renew.
32. Sign up for a new sport or fitness class just for fun, not for results.
It's great to be on a weight-loss or weight-lifting journey, but try something just for the fun of it. Switch things up with a couple of these fitness activities.
33. Book a staycation.
Leave the passport at home and explore a nearby community or another town in your state. There's so much enrichment in your own backyard right here in the U.S., and you don't even have to break the bank.
34. Pre-schedule your mammograms, Pap smear, and peri-menopause checkups for next year.
Take control of your health by pre-scheduling essential appointments like mammograms, Pap smears, and peri-menopause check-ups for 2025. Prioritizing these screenings early ensures you stay on top of your wellness and make time for self-care in the new year.
35. Cut off support of beauty and wellness professionals whose customer service is below standard.
This is another one that many Black women have been vocal about—from unrealistic pre-appointment requirements, to booking fees, to long waits, to unsavory in-salon experiences. Spot the red flags early, and just stop accommodating foolishness. Support salons or experienced stylists who are kind, have proper systems in place and value your time.
36. Schedule five to 10-minute moments of silence on your calendar.
Again, wellness is not optional, and if it's not on my calendar, it's not official. Sit quietly. Pray. Meditate. Or do nothing. The benefits of silent moments are almost endless.
37. Download a meditation app.
If you've found that meditation is difficult to schedule or to even start, an app can help. Try this, this, or this one, and take that step to embrace something new to enhance your wellness routine. If you're tired of downloading apps, create a playlist for meditation via Amazon Music or Spotify and schedule a reminder to do it once a day or week.
38. Invest in a healthy meal prep or delivery service.
Time is emotionally expensive, so save as much of it as possible. Getting into meal prep to keep to your goals is a great way to save time, stress, and effort. The health benefits of meal prepping have also been proven via research.
39. Create a positive playlist on Spotify, Amazon Music, YouTube, or other streaming platform.
It can be podcasts, music, affirmations, or somatic sounds. It's a game-changer. You can even set an alarm to wake you up to start your day with the positive playlist. Not into creating your own? There are plenty to choose from with a quick search.
40. Set up reminders for Alexa (Siri or other AI) to remind you, "You are loved," and "You are okay."
This simple effort can boost your endorphins and remind you that you're indeed, not alone, and you will be okay, regardless. To set mine up, I simply commanded, "Alexa, remind me everyday 'Jesus loves me,'" and like clockwork she does. She almost scared the ish out of me one day when I'd forgotten the reminder was active, but it was the reminder I needed when anxiety had gotten the best of me that week.
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High Achievers: Black Celebs Redefining The Cannabis Industry With Purpose
As an avid cannabis lover, I truly appreciate the magic of the flower.
I also believe it's crucial to create a space for Black women to fully participate in the cannabis industry. We need to empower Black women to not only consume cannabis but also to thrive as entrepreneurs. As the only demographic stigmatized for cannabis use, this inclusivity is essential.
According to FlowHub, cannabis will add $115.2 billion to the economy in 2024. Despite this growth, Black women remain significantly underrepresented in cannabis leadership roles. Data from MJBizDaily reveals that men own 80% of cannabis businesses. Furthermore, Black people constitute only 2% of cannabis company ownership nationwide.
With that said, we thought it was only right that we curate a list of Black celebrity-owned cannabis brands you can support. For many of these folks, the brands are designed to bridge cannabis culture with storytelling, creating space for underrepresented voices in the industry. They strive to use cannabis to cultivate creativity and promote equity within an industry that has disproportionately affected Black communities.
1.Lena Waithe
Lena Waithe launched First Draft, her first cannabis partnership and collaboration with entrepreneur Chris Ball’s Ball Family Farms. She told ESSENCE, “He’s so passionate about it—he invited me to his plant and I saw him in his element. And he said, ‘If we’re going to do business, you’ve got to get to know me.'” Soon after forming a friendship, the pair decided to collaborate on First Draft. This hybrid cannabis strain, released in Los Angeles stores last year, offers a fruity experience described as promoting calm, bliss, and creativity.
2.Method Man
Method Man created TICAL (Taking Into Consideration All Lives) as a cannabis brand rooted in social justice. Recognizing the racial disparities in the cannabis industry, TICAL partners with Black-owned dispensaries and highlights quality products while advocating for equity. His efforts aim to dismantle stigma and create opportunities for communities of color.
3.Jay-Z
Jay-Z debuted Monogram in 2020, presenting a luxury cannabis line under the parent company The Parent Company, where he serves as Chief Visionary Officer. Focused on high-end products, Monogram offers artisanal cannabis curated by experts. Despite its premium positioning, the brand has faced financial challenges in a volatile market, reflecting the difficulties of scaling even with a superstar founder. Amid reports of a $575 million loss breaking early this month, it has since been reported that Jay-Z is no longer tied to the luxury weed line.
4.The Game
The Game co-founded Trees by Game, a cannabis lifestyle brand offering a range of premium products from flowers to concentrates. Known for blending his West Coast roots and entrepreneurial drive, The Game positions his brand as an authentic voice in the cannabis space. His involvement underscores the intersection of hip-hop and cannabis culture.
5.Jaleel White
Known for his role as Steve Urkel, Jaleel White ventured into cannabis with ItsPurpl, a collaboration with 710 Labs. Specializing in Purple Urkle strains, his brand merges nostalgia with premium-quality cannabis, catering to aficionados and new consumers alike. ItsPurpl reflects White’s commitment to authenticity and innovation.
6.Al Harrington
Former NBA player Al Harrington founded Viola, a cannabis company named after his grandmother. Viola champions Black ownership in the cannabis industry while producing premium products. Harrington also prioritizes social equity, advocating for criminal justice reform and creating pathways for minority entrepreneurs.
7.Whoopi Goldberg
Whoopi Goldberg co-created Whoopi & Maya, a cannabis line focused on alleviating menstrual pain and other conditions affecting women’s health. Although the company has since ceased operations, Goldberg’s venture was groundbreaking in addressing women’s needs in a male-dominated cannabis market, highlighting the plant’s medicinal benefits.
The EGOT winner and co-host of The View, is expanding her cannabis business. Under the WhoopFam umbrella, she has a new brand and is revamping Whoopi & Maya. Emma & Clyde, named for Goldberg's late mother and brother, was initially launched in 2022 with a limited Arizona run. The brand is now expanding to select stores in California, Arizona, and Ohio. It offers a range of products for both medical and recreational users, including edibles, pre-rolls, flowers, and accessories.
8.Lil Wayne
GKUA Ultra Premium, launched by Lil Wayne, focuses on high-end cannabis. The brand is a cultural extension of his creativity and artistry, blending music and cannabis culture. He told Forbes, “I used to just want to get high, now I smoke to get inspired. With GKUA, I'm sharing a feeling that I love." The rapper’s Co-founder Beau Golob added, “The combination of our incredible products, market knowledge and commitment to quality, paired with the unmatched fanbase of Lil Wayne, the ultimate cannabis connoisseur, creates an unprecedented opportunity to create a cannabis brand that values creativity and the artistic pursuit.”
9.Ricky Williams
The former NFL star created Highsman, a cannabis lifestyle brand featuring strains tailored to sports themes like Pre-Game and Post-Game. Williams emphasizes wellness, integrating cannabis into mental and physical health practices.Highsman decided to merge with Frozen Fields and Abundant Labs. Ricky told Forbes, “To remain competitive and drive continued growth, we began exploring M&A opportunities about a year ago, seeking to integrate our brand into a scalable backend. After numerous discussions with potential acquirers and partners, we concluded that merging with Frozen Fields and Abundant Labs presented the strongest path forward.”
10.Damian Marley
As part of Evidence, Marley turned a former prison in California into a cannabis cultivation facility, highlighting his focus on social justice and high-quality cannabis. Locals pushed back against plans for a weed-growing facility in their area. “Educating a community that was conservative was not easy,” Dan Dalton, co-founder shared withForbes. “It was hard to convey that our cannabis wouldn’t hit their streets and drive crime. What we grow gets into trucks and leaves the town; the facility has no signage. And all this tax revenue is here for the town now. The first year we provided 100 jobs.”
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