It's official. You've been grounded for a few weeks and are being forced to stay in your home, which can feel like solitary confinement. Mama Corona did not come here to play with you!
While you've been prescribed to socially distance yourself, the isolation can leave you feeling idle and anxious with concerns around the impact this will have on the economy, your job security, or your business. Times like this can feel like punishment, bringing up those same fears, frustrations, and feelings of being "bad", but this time with money, leaving you uncertain about your financial future.
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Many people think worries about money are just a "broke" person's problem, but SPOILER ALERT, they're not. The truth is, even HIGH EARNERS can still have a TON of fear around money. It's the equivalent of hearing someone cough around you during this pandemic--the kind of fear that makes your body tense up and makes you question why your throat or stomach is hurting all of a sudden or why you aren't feeling well.
As a Money Mindset + Business Coach, I am here to help you replace panic with peace, and turn your fears into financial favor. Here are 7 steps to get started:
1. Get grounded (in a good way).
First, take inventory of your bills. If you are concerned about the months to come, figure out what is a necessity versus a luxury. If you have the money, pay your bills. If you're experiencing financial hardship, take action.
Call the creditors and see if you can receive a 60-day suspension of payments or interest.
This may apply to mortgages, rent, cable, electric, student loans, etc. While the debts won't necessarily be forgiven, it will provide you an opportunity to get on solid ground. Connect with nature, take social media breaks when needed, and make sure you are still connecting with others and not isolating yourself during social distancing.
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2. Get out of your own head (and into your body).
With gyms shutting down across the country, your usual workout routine may not be available. Get creative with home workouts or take them outside for some fresh air and sunshine. You can find plenty of free workouts online or support your fitness friends that have taken their businesses online.
The endorphins will help you find a sense of peace in the midst of chaos, helping you to make better, more informed decisions. Make a habit of this, and if you find yourself overextended financially once the panic over coronavirus subsides, you can cancel your gym membership and pay yourself instead.
3. Shift your mindset.
Balance is key. Enjoying experiences and guilty pleasures are necessary as life is meant to be enjoyed. When you're feeling financial uncertainty, shift your mindset from CONSUMERISM to OWNERSHIP. Your emotions and boredom can get the best of you during this time which will only make you feel more financially strapped. With the way Amazon Prime is so conveniently set up, you may find yourself spending unnecessarily.
Rather than letting boredom take all your dollars that you won't see again, get in on the greatest sales of the year by making purchases that will actually provide you a return on your investment.
Just because you can't fly right now doesn't mean you can't buy and hold a piece of your favorite airlines. Those stocks might just bring you back some "free flights" in the future. Cryptocurrency and stocks are having their biggest sales in a long time right now. Plant a few seeds that will potentially help you rebound or pivot in the months and years to come.
4. Go digital.
Create or take your side hustle or business digital. And no, I'm not talking about unethical business practices like hoarding 17,000 bottles of hand sanitizer and getting banned from selling them online during a global pandemic. I'm talking about a business that feels like it's made for you because it is. Do you think it's a coincidence you've been forced to sit and slow down? It's times like this when you have more time to find and develop your purpose.
Take this time to assess your aptitude (innate gifts) and learned skill sets to monetize your talents. The world has been changing right before your eyes, and if you've been distracted by life, it's providing you with an opportunity. Will you take it?
5. Adapt.
Remember your ex, Blockbuster? It can be hard to recall when you found the current love of your life, Netflix. When Blockbuster didn't adapt, refused to do his inner work to heal and get with the times, he became a thing of the past and just didn't do it for you anymore as you evolved. This rings true more than ever today as society and technology continue to evolve. Some of the most lucrative and disruptive ideas were born from the last recession.
It is during these times it pays to be more receptive than ever to new money strategies and understand that through change comes opportunity.
Need an example of how to adapt? If you've been driving Lyft or Uber and this income stream has left you financially stressed, adapt to the current environment and consider food or grocery delivery (i.e., UberEats and Instacart, respectively).
6. Financial wellness is not determined by your bank balance.
This may sound counterintuitive. However, how much money you make or have does not determine your financial health. While being cash strapped can create anxiety, financial wellness is how you feel about your current financial situation. True abundance is being grateful and at peace no matter where you are. As we navigate through the unknowns in the wilderness of the coronavirus and the economic impact, focus on financial peace and balance. There are a lot of people whose identity is tied to money, who have lots of it, and they are being challenged to figure out what's really important.
Image via Giphy
7. Own your money mindset. Don't let it own you.
What does this mean exactly? It means to gain clarity and take hold of the way you think and behave when it comes to your money. Oftentimes our beliefs around money and scarcity mindset run deep, connected to our childhoods. If you've never healed your relationship with money, it's a great time to invest in doing so. The fear, anxiety, and avoidance around money that has you stuck in cycles of shame and guilt aren't even yours and it's time to unpack that.
A truly abundant mindset is being grateful with what you currently have no matter where you are in your journey to financial wellness, even during a quarantine.
Staying grounded and connected especially during these chaotic times will help you shift from fearful to favored, like scoring the last pack of toilet paper. Don't you agree?
Did you know that xoNecole has a podcast? Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to join us for weekly convos over cocktails (without the early morning hangover.)
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Exclusive: Melanie Fiona On Making High-Vibrational Music & Saying Yes To Partnership
Melanie Fiona is back! After taking a little more than a decade-long hiatus, she has officially made her return to music and blessed us with two singles, “Say Yes” and “I Choose You.” While both singles are very different from each other, they both reflect who she is today and the type of music she wants to make. In our conversation, the mom of two expressed what she learned during her time away.
“It's interesting, even when I said it is like coming back, I don't ever feel like I really left because I was always still performing. I've still been public. It's not like I went into being this recluse person or version of myself, but the thing that I really learned in this process is that I think things take time,” Melanie says in a xoNecole exclusive.
“I think often we're so caught up in it, being on the timing of demand or popularity, or, like, striking while the iron is hot and the thing that I've learned is that everything is on God's time. That's it. Every time I thought I would have been ready, or, like, things were taking too long, I had to reship some things, personally, professionally, in my life. I also gave myself permission to make a living, not just make a living, but make a life for myself.”
Making a life for herself included getting married to Grammy-nominated songwriter Jared Cotter, starting a family, and embracing new landscapes, such as podcasting as a co-host of The Mama’s Den podcast. She also began doing more spiritual work and self-care practices like meditation, sound healing, Reiki, acupuncture, and boundary setting, which allowed her to get in touch with her inner voice.
“I wasn't putting out music, and I wasn't experiencing a number one record, but I was being a number one mom,” she says.
“I was experiencing things that were allowing me to heal and get in touch with myself so that I could make new music from a space of joy and freedom, and excitement again because I definitely feel like I did lose some excitement because of just politics and industry and what it can do to your mental health and even your physical health. So giving myself the space to really just say, ‘Hey, it's okay. Everything's right on time.’”
The joy and excitement are felt in one of two new singles, “I Choose You,” which is more of a lovers rock vibe, a tribute to Melanie’s Caribbean roots. While the Grammy award-winner is known for ballads like “It Kills Me” and “Fool For You,” she is becoming more intentional about the music she makes, calling it high-vibrational music. She says her music is a “reflection of my life,” as it captures every facet, from hanging out with friends to riding around in her car.
“Say Yes” has the classic R&B vibe Melanie is known for. However, both songs are inspired by her relationship. Melanie and Jared got married in December 2020, and the Toronto-bred artist dished on their relationship. Fun fact: he is featured in the “Say Yes” music video.
“When we first started dating, I had come into that relationship post a lot of self-work. I had gotten out of a long-term relationship, I had a year and a half to date and be by myself and do a lot of work on myself alone. And when we met, I remember feeling like this has to be my person because I feel it,” she says.
“And so when we went into that relationship, and we started dating, I was very clear. I was like, I know what I want. I'm very clear on what I need, and I'm not going to withhold my truth about myself in this process because of pride or fear of rejection. I know you love me, but I'm coming with my heart in my hand to let you know that if we're gonna get there, we have to put fear aside and say yes. So that was kind of like my open letter to him, which is why the video is us having a conversation.”
Melanie also shares that saying yes to her partner has empowered her in many ways, including motherhood and showing up for herself. Her new EP, also titled Say Yes, will be available at the top of 2025.
Check out the full interview below.
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Feature image by Franco Zulueta
Issa Rae On Burnout & Why Protecting Her Marriage Is The Ultimate Act Of Self-Care
Brooke DeVard created theNaked Beauty Podcast in 2016 as an experiment to tell the stories of people who view beauty, wellness, and fashion as a form of self-expression. The podcast connects with people who share a similar approach and love for the practice of living through the lens of beauty and wellness. DeVard finds inspiration in people who take risks with their self-expression.
Who better represents self-expression than THEE Issa Rae?
Homegirl has been empowering us to be our most authentic selves for over a decade. Issa Rae’s The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl redefined representation by showcasing a relatable, quirky, and imperfect Black woman navigating life’s challenges. Through humor and authenticity, she dismantled stereotypes and empowered audiences to embrace their individuality. Rae’s work highlighted that Black women can be multifaceted and vulnerable while still deserving of love and success.
Beyond representation, she created opportunities for other Black creatives through her production company, Hoorae, fostering inclusion in Hollywood and inspiring a new generation to tell their stories unapologetically.
So, when Issa and Brooke decided to have a kiki on Naked Beauty, best believe we were locked in. Keep reading for the moments that highlight her journey through self-discovery, embracing her authenticity, and prioritizing her well-being.
On Feeling Beautiful
The Insecure starshared that she didn’t feel beautiful until visiting Senegal at 16-17. Seeing people who looked like her was life-changing. “What I look like was the beauty standard was life-changing.” She went on to say, “LA was not the place to feel beautiful, I will say that.”
On Her Hair Relationship Evolution
Issatransitioned from seeing her natural hair as a “burden” to embracing it after seeing more natural hair representations in college. She cut it all off to promote Awkward Black Girl and encourages others to do the same at least once because it changed her life. Issa proclaimed, “It really frees you of your hair expectations in a lot of ways.” The actress continued, “Being free was a feeling I had never felt before.”
Miss Coco Chanel once said, “A woman who cuts her hair is about to change her life.” A fresh haircut's transformative power can create a sense of confidence and a sharp new look, symbolizing new beginnings. This sentiment is echoed in Coco Chanel's famous quote, highlighting the profound impact of a well-executed hairstyle.
When it comes to the natural hair moments on Insecure, Issa’s collaboration with Felicia Leatherwood was everything. Together, they created iconic natural hair moments for the show even when Issa had three inches of hair.
On Advocating for Herself
She has learned to advocate for herself but admits she sometimes overdoes it. “Sometimes I advocate a little too hard and have to fall back… I know I’m not always right.” With having one opportunity to get it right, she holds it dearly while she also sees the power of collaboration.
On Her Movie 'One of Them Days'
SZA and Keke Palmer’s roles stood out in the trailer dropped a few weeks ago. Issa shared, “SZA was a muse for Insecure. Keke can make anything entertaining… I have a new respect for her.” She calls their chemistry “funny as fuck” and “immediately amazing.” She can’t wait for people to see them together.
On Style Evolution
The LA native recognizes that she has become more aware and intentional about her style choices over time. Issa Rae's red carpet style is anything but safe. She's known for her bold prints, statement heels, and a particular fondness for jumpsuits. Over the years, Rae has graced events in show-stopping pieces by top designers.
Memorable looks include a frilled Off-White dress at the 2017 MTV Movie & TV Awards, a custom Pyer Moss jumpsuit adorned with 180,000 Swarovski crystals at the 2018 CFDA Awards (where she also broke ground as the first Black female host), and a stunning icy blue Vera Wang jumpsuit at the 70th Annual Emmy Awards. The woman is a star in every way.
On Skincare Routine
Issa recently had skin tags removed, aiding her “poreless” complexion. “I wasn’t always a ‘sunscreen girly.’ ” Her current skincare routine includes hyaluronic acid, Vitamin C serum, and her favorite product, Dewtopia by Ole Henrikson.
On Work and Self-Care
It’s no secret that Issa loves working but she shared that she honors self-care through baths, time with friends, and random outings. And on the drinking and smoking front, she says that she’s much more of a sipper than a smoker… very different from Issa Dee.
On Privacy and Boundaries
Protecting her privacy is a part of her self-care. She believes it’s important to keep things private and precious. “Being able to know that this is mine and nobody else’s,” is what serves her most. We saw this actualize when she popped out with a whole husband and we had no clue. But we get it because sometimes you have to protect what you hold dear when you’re in the spotlight. Issa also believes that other people are significantly more interesting than her.
On Burnout
Issa has gotten better at taking time off but admits struggles with burnout.“Sometimes unhealthily in terms of shutting down. It manifests as powering through, which is also really unhealthy.”She now has one day a week where she does absolutely nothing.
Watch her interview with Brooke in full below:
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Featured image by Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images