

Is it just me or does it seem like, these days, folks are used to just throwing words and phrases out without really understanding what they mean? Take being a free spirit, for example. While some people may be spontaneous (at times), like to take risks or even be a lot of fun to be around, that doesn't automatically or necessarily make them a free spirit. In short, a free-spirited person is someone who's considered to be a nonconformist. And, even with that said, it goes a little bit deeper.
So, whether you feel that deep down you're a free spirit (and you want an article to confirm it) or you've got someone in your life who you sense may be one, I've got 10 signs that can definitely shed light on what being a free-spirited individual is truly all about.
1. You’re Fiercely Independent
My mother has told me, often, that beyond the standard "mama" and "dada", my first words as a baby were actually an abbreviated sentence — "I do myself, Mommy." She always follows that up with, "And you've basically been that way ever since." To a large extent, I wholeheartedly agree. Independence, for the most part, is about not depending on other people, especially when it comes to making a living. To me, this kind of person is cool on so many levels. Still, I will put the disclaimer out there that if you're so independent that you mentally, emotionally or literally live like you're an island in need of no relationships with anyone, that could result in some pretty lonely or limited living. Bottom line, when it comes to being an independent person, balance is key.
2. Peer Pressure Is Close to Irrelevant to You
Someone once said to me, "You don't care what anybody thinks." My response to that was, "I care. It's just that my list is extremely short." I promise you that I don't get what good comes from "following the crowd", just for following's sake. Humans are fickle. Humans are fallible. And oftentimes, they say and do things, just to fit in — not because those things are good or right. If you read all of that and felt like you were about to clap at your own phone or monitor, I'm sure you can get where I'm coming from here. Do free spirits have friends? Sure they do. Do they feel like they need a ton of 'em or that they must succumb to peer pressure in order to feel good about themselves? Usually not.
3. You’re Open to New Things
Wanna know someone who's tried a billion-and-one things before? Free spirits. That's because they tend to get bored pretty easily and don't like to stick to routines very much. Because of this, they tend to have lots of stamps on their passport, can recommend a ton of restaurants in their city and are considered to be pretty big risk takers overall. That's cool. The flipside is, because newness is so important to them, sometimes they're not the best when it comes to holding down a job or even a relationship for that matter. Sometimes the novelty of things (and people) is so important to them that they can't sit still for very long — which is usually more frustrating to the people around them than them. (Right, free spirits?)
4. You Do Not Live for Work
It actually wasn't until I sat down to write this article that I even knew there was such a thing as Workaholics Day (it's July 5). According to an article that I read concerning it, close to 50 percent of Americans consider themselves to be one. That's a damn shame. It's also pretty foreign when it comes to free spirits. When it comes to this particular point, an extreme version that comes to mind is Lynn from Girlfriends.
Free spirits are the polar opposite of workaholics. They typically hate the idea of being in an office setting. They often go the freelance or contract work route in order to avoid getting in a rut. And sometimes, because work is not something that is a huge priority to them, they don't have to be rolling in cash, they may not be the most financially stable on the planet and/or they may not have the most secure financial plans for the future.
The thing that free spirits have to keep in mind is there is a time for work and a time for play, no doubt. Still, there is a time to pay bills and a time to have an emergency fund for car repairs, hospital bills, etc. If you're a free spirit, you might've read all of that and said, "Eh. The universe will handle it." And yeah, that's just what I thought you would say (LOL).
5. You Know That Originals Are Incomparable (and You Are, Indeed, an Original)
All of us have moments when we need a bit of an ego boost (in the most humble way possible, of course). But when it comes to a free spirit, they don't typically struggle with self-esteem issues — at least as it relates to what other people think about them (which I already touched on). A big part of the reason why is because free spirits relish in their individuality. They totally get what being an original is all about. They like that there are things about them that are extremely unique. In fact, it's almost like they will go out of their way to do something that will make themselves stand out — a totally-out-of-the-box hair color, an oddly-placed tattoo or piercing, a fashion sense that is truly uncommon. And because they are incomparable, they don't typically struggle with envying others because others look and think nothing like them and they like that. Yeah, if "I don't give AF about what others are on" was a person, free spirits would definitely fit the bill.
6. You Move Like Water
When it comes to this trait of free spirits, a Bruce Lee quote immediately comes to mind. Perhaps you are familiar with it:
"Be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way around or through it. If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves. Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend."
Because I was surrounded by control freaks while growing up and, subsequently, ended up having PTSD from it and then had to work on freeing myself from being a control freak myself (which I honestly have only semi-mastered in my 40s), it wasn't until I was in my mid-late 30s that this mindset of Bruce's became a priority to me. Another example of "flowing" is the first time I went to South Africa to visit my family. Because flying isn't my favorite thing on this planet, the turbulence, for all those hours, had a sistah tense. My brother said, "If you relax and move with the plane, it will be easier on your mind and your body." He was right.
Free spirits get, for the most part, that there is only so much that you can control. What you can't, you need to leave up to God (some would say the universe) and chill out. To those who aren't very flexible, the mere thought of being like water stresses them out and causes them to see free spirits as being nonchalant and even flippant. Free spirits don't care, though, because they are a lot more calm and serene due to feeling this way.
7. Long-Term Commitments Are a Bit of a Stretch in Your Mind
A couple of years ago, I checked out a video from a YouTube channel that I like called nappyheadedjojoba. I enjoyed it so much that it inspired an article for the platform entitled, "Single-Minded: So, What If You Like Dating But DON'T Desire Marriage?" because that's pretty much what nappyheadedjojoba said — relationships, cool. Marriage? Not so cool. You know, a couple of months ago, I was having a conversation with a married friend of mine about what she would do, relationally, if she were to ever get a divorce or her husband were to pass away. "Not get married again, I can promise you that," she said. While it might seem on the onset that she regrets getting married (if you personally do, check out "What Should You Do If You Feel Like You Married The Wrong Person?"), that's not what she meant. See, this person, in a lot of ways, is a bit of a free spirit herself and what marriage has revealed to her is she doesn't want to constantly answer to someone or even share all of the time. Actually, she reminds me of another never-been-married-before woman (who is close to her 70s at this point) who once said to me, "I'm too selfish to be married." She doesn't like the idea of accountability and sharing either.
While there does seem to be this odd misconception that just because some people don't desire marriage, they must not be interested in companionship — or are even capable of long-lasting intimacy — at all, free spirits totally get where long-term non-committals are coming from. It's not that free spirits are incapable of loving; they just don't like the paperwork, the high expectations and the constant day-to-day practices that are required in order to make marriage happen. So, they find other ways to connect. And they are just fine with that.
8. You Collect Memories, Not Objects
I don't know about y'all, but I don't personally know too many free-spirited individuals who are "gifts people" when it comes to love languages. In fact, I don't know too many free-spirited people who are big on money or tangible things at all. If anything, they are more into quality time (or maybe even physical touch) because they like the memories that come from spending time with people they enjoy being around. This means that if you've got a free spirit in your life, you don't have to worry about impressing them with expensive stuff. At the same time, they can still be a bit challenging to please — one, because they oftentimes have quirky taste and two, since memories (and nostalgia) are such a big deal to them, you've got to put real thought into what you plan on doing with them. While we're here, another thing to keep in mind is because they are so big on memories, they can sometimes be easy to disappoint. Plus, because this is the case, they aren't always the best at forgiving whenever you do.
9. Organized ANYTHING Kinda Freaks You Out
It's no secret that while Type A people tend to be far more organized, they also tend to be a lot more impatient and prone to being stressed out. Type B folks? C'mon. How much more "zen" can you get than a lot of them? That said, free spirits would definitely fall into the Type B category. While this can be cool on a lot of levels, because being Type B means that you are way more easy-going, there is something to be said for order. Organized people tend to pay bills on time. Organized people tend to manage their time well. Organized people tend to have a clean house and car — you get where I'm coming from. The thing that free spirits have to keep in mind when it comes to being organized is it's important to remember that you can be "free" and responsible too. In fact, when you are an adult, you absolutely should.
10. You Live Passionately
Probably my favorite thing about free-spirited folks is how passionate they are. This results in them being pretty positive people. This results in them knowing what it means to stay in the moment. This results in them enjoying (and taking) sex to new levels. This results in them feeling things fully and intensely. This results in them being excited about big things and simple pleasures. In a nutshell, free spirits like cultivating and experiencing pure, real and lasting joy. They believe that things should be felt deeply, that relationships should be profound, and life is meant to create powerful moments, as often as possible. This is a quality that makes free spirits a blessing — whether you are one or happen to know one. So, if this is the case, celebrate! They make life so much richer in their own special way. They really and truly do.
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney & Jill Marie Jones On 'Games Women Play' & Dating Over 40
What do you get when you mix unfiltered truths, high-stakes romance, and a few well-timed one-liners? You get Games Women Play—the sizzling new stage play by Je’Caryous Johnson that’s part relationship rollercoaster, part grown-woman group chat.
With a powerhouse cast that includes Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney, Jill Marie Jones, Carl Payne, Chico Bean, and Brian J. White, the play dives headfirst into the messy, hilarious, and heart-wrenching games people play for love, power, and peace of mind. And the women leading this story? They’re bringing their whole selves to the stage—and leaving nothing behind.
From Script to Spotlight
The road to Games Women Play started over 20 years ago—literally.
“This script was written 20 years ago,” Jill Marie Jones said with a smile. “It was originally called Men, Money & Gold Diggers, and I was in the film version. So when Je’Caryous called me to bring it to the stage, I was like, ‘Let’s go.’” Now reimagined for 2025, the play is updated with sharp dialogue and modern relationship dynamics that feel all too real.
Demetria McKinney, no stranger to Je’Caryous Johnson’s productions, jumped at the opportunity to join the cast once again. “This is my third time working with him,” she shared. “It was an opportunity to stretch. I’d never been directed by Carl Payne before, and the chance to work with talent I admire—Jill, Claudia, Chico—it was a no-brainer.”
Claudia Jordan joked that she originally saw the role as just another check. “I didn’t take it that seriously at first,” she admitted. “But this is my first full-on tour—and now I’ve got a whole new respect for how hard people work in theater. This ain’t easy.”
Modern Love, Stage Left
The play doesn’t hold back when it comes to the messier parts of love. One jaw-dropping moment comes when a live podcast proposal flips into a prenup bombshell—leaving the audience (and the characters) gasping.
Demetria broke it down with honesty. “People don’t ask the real questions when they date. Like, ‘Do you want kids? How do you feel about money?’ These convos aren’t happening, and then everyone’s confused. That moment in the play—it’s real. That happens all the time.”
Jill chimed in, noting how the play speaks to emotional disconnect. “We’re giving each other different tokens of love. Men might offer security and money. Women, we’re giving our hearts. But there’s a disconnect—and that’s where things fall apart.”
And then Claudia, of course, took it all the way there. “These men don’t even want to sign our prenups now!” she laughed. “They want to live the soft life, too. Wearing units, gloss, getting their brows done. We can’t have nothing! Y’all want to be like us? Then get a damn period and go through menopause.”
Dating Over 40: “You Better Come Correct”
When the conversation turned to real-life relationships, all three women lit up. Their experiences dating in their 40s and 50s have given them both clarity—and zero tolerance for games.
“I feel sexier than I’ve ever felt,” said Jill, who proudly turned 50 in January. “I say what I want. I mean what I say. I’m inside my woman, and I’m not apologizing for it.”
Demetria added that dating now comes with deeper self-awareness. “Anybody in my life is there because I want them there. I’ve worked hard to need nobody. But I’m open to love—as long as you keep doing what got me there in the first place.”
For Claudia, the bar is high—and the peace is priceless. “I’ve worked hard for my peace,” she said. “I’m not dating for food. I’m dating because I want to spend time with you. And honestly, if being with you isn’t better than being alone with my candles and fountains and cats? Then no thanks.”
Channeling Strength & Icon Status
Each actress brings something different to the play—but all of them deliver.
“I actually wish I could be messier on stage,” Claudia joked. “But I think about my grandmother—she was born in 1929, couldn’t even vote or buy a house without a man, and didn’t give a damn. She was fearless. That’s where my strength comes from.”
For Jill, the comparisons to her iconic Girlfriends character Toni Childs aren’t far off—but this role gave her a chance to dig deeper. “If you really understood Toni, you’d see how layered she was. And Paisley is the same—misunderstood, but strong. There’s more to her than people see at first glance.”
Demetria, who juggles singing and acting seamlessly, shared that live theater pushes her in a new way. “Every moment on stage counts. You can’t redo anything. It’s a different kind of love and discipline. You have to give the performance away—live, in the moment—and trust that it lands.”
Laughter, Lessons & Black Girl Gems
The show has plenty of laugh-out-loud moments—and the cast isn’t shy about who steals scenes.
“Chico Bean gets a lot of gasps and laughs,” Claudia said. “And Naomi Booker? Every scene she’s in—she’s hilarious.”
But the play isn’t just about humor. It leaves space for reflection—especially for Black women.
“I hope we get back to the foundation of love and communication,” said Demetria. “A lot of us are in protector mode. But that’s turned into survival mode. We’ve lost softness. We’ve lost connection.”
Claudia agreed. “We’re doing it all—but it’s not because we want to be strong all the time. It’s because we have to be. And I just want women to know: You can have peace, you can be soft. But stop bringing your old pain into new love. Don’t let past heartbreak build walls so high that the right person can’t climb over.”
Final Act: Pack the House
If there’s one thing this cast agrees on, it’s that this play isn’t just entertainment—it’s necessary.
“Atlanta is the Black entertainment hub,” Claudia said. “We need y’all to show up for this play. Support the arts. Support each other. Because when we pack the house, we make space for more stories like this.”
Games Women Play is more than a play—it’s a mirror. You’ll see yourself, your friends, your exes, and maybe even your next chapter. So get ready to laugh, reflect, and maybe even heal—because the games are on.
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It’s officially Miss Keri, Baby season again—and if you ask us, it’s been a long time coming. After 15 years away from the music scene, Keri Hilson has returned not only with a brand-new album, but also a captivating new role in Lifetime’s Fame—the latest installment in The Temptations film franchise.
Between the album We Need to Talk: Love and her leading role in Fame, this isn’t just a comeback—it’s a rebirth. The Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter turned actress is letting us into her world like never before, unpacking themes of vulnerability, healing, and inner strength with grace, grit, and raw artistry.
Now streaming on Lifetime, Fame follows two superstar sisters—played by Keri and singer/actress Keshia Chanté—as they navigate the cost of stardom, sibling rivalry, and the dark side of desire. The film also stars Romeo Miller, Ecstasia Sanders, Nathan Witte, and Sophie Carriere, and is executive produced by Derrick Williams and Adriane Hopper Williams of the Seven Deadly Sins franchise.
As for the music? We Need to Talk: Love is a three-part album (Love, Drama, Redemption) that tells the story of a woman who’s been through it—and has risen from the ashes. “It was time to speak for myself,” Keri says.
We sat down with Keri to talk about her return to music, her passion for acting, the emotional depth of Fame, and how she’s learning to care for herself amidst the chaos.
From R&B Queen to Drama Star: Keri Gets Into Character
“Even though she’s famous—as am I—it was really her humanity that I wanted to portray.”
Keri plays Cherish, one half of a superstar sibling duo who must confront their fractured relationship in the wake of a traumatic robbery. For Keri, the role was more than a character—it was a psychological study.
“I enjoy departures from reality. That’s why I love acting,” she shares. “Psychology is one of my favorite things in life. I became a writer because I’m an observer of human nature, emotion, and behavior. I think I did a good job showing her humanity.”
The Fame Isn’t Always Worth the Price
“Keep the main thing the main thing.”
Keri doesn’t sugarcoat the industry. When asked about what Fame reveals about the dark side of celebrity culture, her answer is clear:
“It’s a cautionary tale. It reminds you to keep your family close and not allow anything to come between them—especially in pursuit of success. Keep the main thing the main thing. For me, that’s family, love, spirituality, and values.”
Three Chapters, One Story: Love. Drama. Redemption.
“I’ve shed the fear. It was time to tell my own story.”
Released April 18th, We Need to Talk: Love is Keri’s first album in 15 years—and a deeply personal one at that. The three-part project (Love, Drama, Redemption) represents a timeline of healing and growth.
“I’m finally in a place where I’m able and willing to open up more,” she says. “For a while, I became really guarded—shell-shocked, even—after making mistakes in the public eye. Whether it’s all your fault or not, the scrutiny takes its toll. But now, I’ve shed that fear. It’s time to tell my story.”
Cooking, Walks, and Recalibrating in the Chaos
“I’m not doing the best job—but I’m doing what I can.”
Between eight-hour rehearsals, press runs, and music releases, Hilson admits she hasn’t quite figured out the balance yet—but she’s trying. For her, the key is carving out small rituals of normalcy.
“I enjoy cooking. That’s my sanctity,” she says. “I’ll go home, take my makeup off, put on my rehearsal clothes, and cook a meal. I take walks. I run. These little things help me feel like myself again.”
Art Imitates Life (and Album Tracklists)
“Cherish goes from Love… to Drama… to Redemption.”
Asked which album chapter her Fame character would fall into, Keri doesn’t hesitate. “She fits into all three,” she says. “You see her go from love, to drama, to redemption. That arc mirrors the journey of so many women who’ve had to navigate pain and find their way back to themselves.”
No Pressure, Just Art: Keri Wants You to Feel Something
“Just enjoy the art. That’s it.”
After all the time, patience, and healing, Keri isn’t asking for much. She just wants fans to press play—and feel something.
“I just want people to enjoy what they’re seeing and hearing. Enjoy me on screen. Enjoy me through their ears. People have waited, and I feel blessed by that. That helps me keep it all pure and simple.”
As Keri Hilson steps boldly back into the spotlight, it’s clear this era is all about alignment, artistry, and authenticity. With Fame airing on Lifetime and the first chapter of We Need to Talk: Love setting the tone, we’re more than excited to see what’s next.
As she continues to unfold the album’s next two chapters—Drama and Redemption—one thing’s for sure: this isn’t just a comeback. It’s a reintroduction. And we’ll be watching, listening, and cheering her on every step of the way.
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