Quantcast

So, They Say If You've Got A Tattoo, The Sex Is Better. (Hmm.)

Just one more reason to love your body ink.

Sex

Remember when grandma, auntie and/or mama—don't even get me started on the First Lady of your church—used to say that one of the worst things that a person, especially "a lady" could do was get a tattoo? Especially if we wanted to get a job? As with most things in life, seasons (and culture) change. On the work tip, from what I've read, many employers are not as hesitant as they once were. According to one study that caught my attention, around 35 percent of prospective employers said that hiring someone with tats depended on the position they were trying to fill, while 28 percent of them said that it all depended on how many tats a person had, along with where they were on their body. Something else I found interesting about the study was, when they were asked whether or not they took someone with tattoos less seriously, 49.39 percent of people said body ink didn't faze them in that way (very cool).

Because I've worked from home since 2000, maybe that is why I was well into my 20s when I got my first tattoo. It's on my hip and, to be honest, it's so small that it really wasn't all that big of a deal. It wasn't until I was in my 40s that a sistah got bolder and put some semi-large Hebrew letters on that same hip and also one of my favorite bible verses on the inside of my lower right arm. While I have absolutely no regrets when it comes to getting any of them, I can't really say that I am on the "tattoos are addictive" bandwagon either. They ain't cheap. They do hurt. Plus, there's nothing's worse (to me) than having to go back and get an area filled in after the initial healing process (Girrrl…girl). Not that I'm trying to discourage any of you who may be thinking about getting a tattoo for the first time. I just want you to know what you're getting yourself into.

Although I will say that I recently discovered a silver lining to having body ink that I never knew before (hmm…).

What Tattoos and Sex Actually Have in Common (Who Knew?)

media.giphy.com

It never fails. At least 10 times a week (sometimes a day), I will read something in cyberspace that'll have me be like, "What in the world are folks doing out here?!". A recent example came from an article on Revelist's website. The title? "People Are Giving Themselves DIY Stick-And-Poke Tattoos During Quarantine". Tattooing yourself. During a pandemic. Geeze. Shoot, let me tell it, going to a tattoo parlor right now is risky enough. I mean, have you ever read what you're—well, we're—actually signing up for with body ink? Mayo Clinic provided a pretty graphic description when it said, "Typically, the tattoo artist uses a hand-held machine that acts much like a sewing machine, with one or more needles piercing the skin repeatedly. With every puncture, the needles insert tiny ink droplets." Yeah, that's a lot.

So, why do so many of us do it? There are a myriad of reasons. To document a particular time in our life. To represent our own sense of style. To make a permanent declaration about something. To cover up body imperfections. To have a better sex life.

Hol' up. Is that last one for real? According to a study conducted at Kwantlen Polytechnic University in Canada, it very much so is. Some researchers there decided they wanted to test the stereotype that women with tattoos are more "sexually open"—you know, more willing to explore and experiment than the average individual. What they discovered is, of the 814 women who were interviewed (some had tats, some did not), the women with body ink were more willing to engage in casual sex; they were also greater sensation seekers.

How does that even make sense? Think about it. There is a certain level of confidence that it takes to get a tattoo. You've definitely got to have a certain threshold for discomfort in order to get one. From a physical standpoint, you are taking somewhat of a (health) risk (which is the case with any permanent body modification, by the way) by having a tattoo as well. Yeah, we might not like to think about sex in this context, but when you really stop to take all of this in, all of these reasons translate over to coitus pretty seamlessly, don't you think?

Something else that the study pointed out was, another reason why women with tats might be more sexually open is because, when you make the decision to get a tat, whether you realize it or not, you are challenging contemporary views on femininity and sexuality. You are basically saying that you don't follow the status quo when it comes to how you look or what you want—including in the bedroom (again, it makes total sense).

So, how many folks are out here feeling this way? Well, 40 percent of people around the globe have at least one tat on their person (Italy has the most, then Sweden and then the United States). 45 percent of those individuals are between the ages of 30-49, and 32 percent have a higher level of education than the norm. That's a lot of "sexual open-mindedness", y'all.

Not to say that those without tattoos are automatically sexual snooze fests. Shoot, some of my fondest sexual memories came from guys with not one tat on them. But I will close this out by saying that I remember when I was in the room with a friend of mine who was as sexually shy (when it came to talking about sex) as they come. As she was undressing, I was shocked to see two hearts on each side of her pubic bone, right above her vulva. When I made a joke to her husband about them, he grinned, winked and said, "You have no idea." They say a picture is worth a thousand words. Maybe a tattoo is worth a thousand orgasms—and then some.

Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:

What Is 'Erotic Self-Focus' & Why You Should Definitely Try It

10 Sensuous Ways To Boost Your Sexual Self-Esteem

These 10 Hacks Will Help You Love Your Body More

This Is How You Master The Female Orgasm

Featured image by Giphy

ACLU By ACLUSponsored

Over the past four years, we grew accustomed to a regular barrage of blatant, segregationist-style racism from the White House. Donald Trump tweeted that “the Squad," four Democratic Congresswomen who are Black, Latinx, and South Asian, should “go back" to the “corrupt" countries they came from; that same year, he called Elizabeth Warren “Pocahontas," mocking her belief that she might be descended from Native American ancestors.

But as outrageous as the racist comments Trump regularly spewed were, the racially unjust governmental actions his administration took and, in the case of COVID-19, didn't take, impacted millions more — especially Black and Brown people.

To begin to heal and move toward real racial justice, we must address not only the harms of the past four years, but also the harms tracing back to this country's origins. Racism has played an active role in the creation of our systems of education, health care, ownership, and employment, and virtually every other facet of life since this nation's founding.

Our history has shown us that it's not enough to take racist policies off the books if we are going to achieve true justice. Those past policies have structured our society and created deeply-rooted patterns and practices that can only be disrupted and reformed with new policies of similar strength and efficacy. In short, a systemic problem requires a systemic solution. To combat systemic racism, we must pursue systemic equality.

What is Systemic Racism?

A system is a collection of elements that are organized for a common purpose. Racism in America is a system that combines economic, political, and social components. That system specifically disempowers and disenfranchises Black people, while maintaining and expanding implicit and explicit advantages for white people, leading to better opportunities in jobs, education, and housing, and discrimination in the criminal legal system. For example, the country's voting systems empower white voters at the expense of voters of color, resulting in an unequal system of governance in which those communities have little voice and representation, even in policies that directly impact them.

Systemic Equality is a Systemic Solution

In the years ahead, the ACLU will pursue administrative and legislative campaigns targeting the Biden-Harris administration and Congress. We will leverage legal advocacy to dismantle systemic barriers, and will work with our affiliates to change policies nearer to the communities most harmed by these legacies. The goal is to build a nation where every person can achieve their highest potential, unhampered by structural and institutional racism.

To begin, in 2021, we believe the Biden administration and Congress should take the following crucial steps to advance systemic equality:

Voting Rights

The administration must issue an executive order creating a Justice Department lead staff position on voting rights violations in every U.S. Attorney office. We are seeing a flood of unlawful restrictions on voting across the country, and at every level of state and local government. This nationwide problem requires nationwide investigatory and enforcement resources. Even if it requires new training and approval protocols, a new voting rights enforcement program with the participation of all 93 U.S. Attorney offices is the best way to help ensure nationwide enforcement of voting rights laws.

These assistant U.S. attorneys should begin by ensuring that every American in the custody of the Bureau of Prisons who is eligible to vote can vote, and monitor the Census and redistricting process to fight the dilution of voting power in communities of color.

We are also calling on Congress to pass the John Lewis Voting Rights Advancement Act to finally create a fair and equal national voting system, the cause for which John Lewis devoted his life.

Student Debt

Black borrowers pay more than other students for the same degrees, and graduate with an average of $7,400 more in debt than their white peers. In the years following graduation, the debt gap more than triples. Nearly half of Black borrowers will default within 12 years. In other words, for Black Americans, the American dream costs more. Last week, Majority Leader Chuck Schumer and Sen. Elizabeth Warren, along with House Reps. Ayanna Pressley, Maxine Waters, and others, called on President Biden to cancel up to $50,000 in federal student loan debt per borrower.

We couldn't agree more. By forgiving $50,000 of student debt, President Biden can unleash pent up economic potential in Black communities, while relieving them of a burden that forestalls so many hopes and dreams. Black women in particular will benefit from this executive action, as they are proportionately the most indebted group of all Americans.

Postal Banking

In both low and high income majority-Black communities, traditional bank branches are 50 percent more likely to close than in white communities. The result is that nearly 50 percent of Black Americans are unbanked or underbanked, and many pay more than $2,000 in fees associated with subprime financial institutions. Over their lifetime, those fees can add up to as much as two years of annual income for the average Black family.

The U.S. Postal Service can and should meet this crisis by providing competitive, low-cost financial services to help advance economic equality. We call on President Biden to appoint new members to the Postal Board of Governors so that the Post Office can do the work of providing essential services to every American.

Fair Housing

Across the country, millions of people are living in communities of concentrated poverty, including 26 percent of all Black children. The Biden administration should again implement the 2015 Affirmatively Furthering Fair Housing rule, which required localities that receive federal funds for housing to investigate and address barriers to fair housing and patterns or practices that promote bias. In 1980, the average Black person lived in a neighborhood that was 62 percent Black and 31 percent white. By 2010, the average Black person's neighborhood was 48 percent Black and 34 percent white. Reinstating the Obama-era Fair Housing Rule will combat this ongoing segregation and set us on a path to true integration.

Congress should also pass the American Housing and Economic Mobility Act, or a similar measure, to finally redress the legacy of redlining and break down the walls of segregation once and for all.

Broadband Access

To realize broadband's potential to benefit our democracy and connect us to one another, all people in the United States must have equal access and broadband must be made affordable for the most vulnerable. Yet today, 15 percent of American households with school-age children do not have subscriptions to any form of broadband, including one-quarter of Black households (an additional 23 percent of African Americans are “smartphone-only" internet users, meaning they lack traditional home broadband service but do own a smartphone, which is insufficient to attend class, do homework, or apply for a job). The Biden administration, Federal Communications Commission, and Congress must develop and implement plans to increase funding for broadband to expand universal access.

Enhanced, Refundable Child Tax Credits

The United States faces a crisis of child poverty. Seventeen percent of all American children are impoverished — a rate higher than not just peer nations like Canada and the U.K., but Mexico and Russia as well. Currently, more than 50 percent of Black and Latinx children in the U.S. do not qualify for the full benefit, compared to 23 percent of white children, and nearly one in five Black children do not receive any credit at all.

To combat this crisis, President Biden and Congress should enhance the child tax credit and make it fully refundable. If we enhance the child tax credit, we can cut child poverty by 40 percent and instantly lift over 50 percent of Black children out of poverty.

Reparations

We cannot repair harms that we have not fully diagnosed. We must commit to a thorough examination of the impact of the legacy of chattel slavery on racial inequality today. In 2021, Congress must pass H.R. 40, which would establish a commission to study reparations and make recommendations for Black Americans.

The Long View

For the past century, the ACLU has fought for racial justice in legislatures and in courts, including through several landmark Supreme Court cases. While the court has not always ruled in favor of racial justice, incremental wins throughout history have helped to chip away at different forms of racism such as school segregation ( Brown v. Board), racial bias in the criminal legal system (Powell v. Alabama, i.e. the Scottsboro Boys), and marriage inequality (Loving v. Virginia). While these landmark victories initiated necessary reforms, they were only a starting point.

Systemic racism continues to pervade the lives of Black people through voter suppression, lack of financial services, housing discrimination, and other areas. More than anything, doing this work has taught the ACLU that we must fight on every front in order to overcome our country's legacies of racism. That is what our Systemic Equality agenda is all about.

In the weeks ahead, we will both expand on our views of why these campaigns are crucial to systemic equality and signal the path this country must take. We will also dive into our work to build organizing, advocacy, and legal power in the South — a region with a unique history of racial oppression and violence alongside a rich history of antiracist organizing and advocacy. We are committed to four principles throughout this campaign: reconciliation, access, prosperity, and empowerment. We hope that our actions can meet our ambition to, as Dr. King said, lead this nation to live out the true meaning of its creed.

What you can do:
Take the pledge: Systemic Equality Agenda
Sign up

Featured image by Shutterstock

August invites you to shine bright like the sun which requires you to leave behind the sob stories of being the underdog. Recognize your power as a reflection of the Divine and watch how far you can go. Be mindful of that inner critic when Mercury enters Virgo. For every negative thought, counteract it with three compliments about yourself. When Venus enters her home sign, relationship matters get a whole lot sweeter after the wild ride that was Mercury Retrograde.

Keep reading... Show less
The daily empowerment fix you need.
Make things inbox official.

Lawd, lawd. I'm assuming that I'm not being too presumptuous when I start this all out by saying, I'm pretty sure that more than just a few of us can relate to this title and topic. I know that personally, there are several men from my sexual past who would've been out of my space a lot sooner had the sex not been…shoot, so damn good. And it's because of that very thing that you'll never ever convince me that sex can't mess with your head. The oxytocin highs (that happen when we kiss, cuddle and orgasm) alone can easily explain why a lot of us will make a sexual connection with someone and stay involved with them for weeks, months, years even, even if the mental and emotional dynamic is subpar, at best.

Keep reading... Show less

This article is in partnership with Staples.

As a Black woman slaying in business, you're more than likely focused on the bottom line: Serving your customers and making sure the bag doesn't stop coming in. Well, there's obviously more to running a business than just making boss moves, but as the CEO or founder, you might not have the time, energy, or resources to fill in the blanks.

Keep reading... Show less

"Black men, we're in constant warfare. Every day is a fight outside of my house, so why would I want to come home to more fighting when that is the very place where I should be resting? There are loved ones who I don't speak to as much anymore because they aren't peaceful people. A huge part of the reason why I am happier without my ex is she was rarely a source of peace. The older I get, the more I realize that peace really is the foundation of everything; especially relationships, because how can I nurture anything if I'm in a constant state of influx and chaos? Guys don't care how fine a woman is or how great the sex may be if she's not peaceful because there is nothing more valuable than peace. If the closest person to me is not a source of it, that can ultimately play a role in all kinds of disruption and destruction. No man wants that."

Keep reading... Show less

When Ngozi Opara Sea started Heatfree Hair almost a decade ago, curly and kinky extensions weren't the norm on the market as they seem to be today, especially if you wanted those textures in quality human hair. Beauty supply stores mainly sold synthetic curly hair, and there was a surge of renewal for women who were just beginning to embrace natural styles, taking to YouTube to experiment with new techniques and styles.

Keep reading... Show less
Exclusive Interviews

Exclusive: Find Confidence With This Summer Workout Created By A Black Woman For Black Women

Tone & Sculpt trainer Danyele Wilson makes fitness goals attainable.

Latest Posts