
It's that time of the year, again.
The time of year when the trees die beautifully. The air turns crisp. The pumpkin returns as a lantern and latte. The tricks turn to treats. Horrifying Halloween costumes, quests for candy, and festivals are…
Cancelled.
Let's be honest, everything that made this season the beauty that we all cherished, has been canceled due to Ratched Lady Rona. That is to say, everything but the best thing: Fall movies and shows are back! Well, sort of back. The new season of our favorite shows might be delayed, however, thanks to Netflix, we can rewatch our old favorites like it's the very first time. Plus, we can enjoy the gut-twisting suspense of horror films and shows like the season demands.
Keep reading to check out what is new to Netflix this month.
Everything That's New & Black AF On Netflix In October 2020
October 1: Boomerang

Boomerang
Boomerang is an all-black classic starring Eddie Murphy, Robin Givens, and Halle Berry. The 1992 picture is a film about an ad exec lothario (played by Murphy) that gets a taste of his medicine when his new boss embodies the female version of Murphy.
October 1: The Parkers (Season 1-5)
CBS for Getty ImagesDang, Mama. After waiting for what feels like forever, The Parkers finally landed on Netflix. Sit back and enjoy every second of Kim's ambitious outfits, Nikki's relentless flirting, Professor Oglevee's persistent reluctance, and Stevie and T's silly antics. As a spinoff to Moesha, aspiring fashion designer, Kim Parker is mortified when her vivacious mother, Nikki Parker, decides to enroll in the same community college as her. Watch as Kim tries to navigate life and her mother's new desire to be young, again. As one of the eminent black family shows, The Parkers will have you wishing they never left in the first place.
October 1: Evil (Season 1)

CBS Drama/Netflix
The age old debate of science v. religion returns with a series worth considering. Evil follows two individuals as they unravel the mysteries of a local church, who show's the working of supposed miracles, demonic acts, and strange occurrences.
October 1: Free State of Jones (2016)

Netflix
Clearly on the wrong side of the Civil War, Newt Knight serves as a medic for the Confederate Army, while refusing to fight against the Union. After being forced to die or flee, Knight teams up with a group of runaway slaves to create a historic rebellion.
October 2: Vampires vs. the Bronx (2020)

Netflix
Our deepest fears can be found in some of our realest realities, and Vampires vs. the Bronx is proof of that. The very real reality of gentrification is turned on its head in this horror comedy where a group of teenagers in the Bronx must protect their neighborhood from the vampires that invade their community. Reality bites.
October 6: Saturday Church (2017)
After the death of his father, Ulysses finds himself taking on the responsibilities of his dad. If that isn't bad enough, he must struggle with questioning his gender identity and becoming accepted by those in his community and the transgender community.
October 6: Walk Away From Love

Walk Away From Love
No, this isn't the David Ruffin song that your grandmother played, but it does have some melanin for your pleasure. This film tells of a single attorney who learns to love again after leaving a three-year relationship.
October 9: The Forty-Year-Old Version (2020)
This Sundance stellar focuses on a Radha, a 39-year-old rapper, who reinvents herself in hopes to make it big before 40.
October 15: Half & Half (Seasons 1-4)
No longer do you have to wait on random Sunday afternoons for Half & Half to stumble onto your televisions with Mona's husky voice luring you in about going, "through the journey of discovery." Instead, summon them up whenever you're looking for some sisterly fun. Following two half-sisters, Mona and Dee-Dee, enjoy the adventures and silly shenanigans that transpire after the sisters meet for the first time, as adults. Half & Half will warm your heart, make you smile, and most importantly, it'll make you laugh.
October 15: One on One (Seasons 1-5)

Four Words: Kyla Pratt. Flex Alexander. If that's not enough to bring you in, I don't know what is. Forced to be his daughter's sole guardian, or lose her forever, Flex takes on the responsibility of becoming a single father. While his ex-wife pursues a job out of the country, Flex struggles to raise his teenage daughter, Breanna, and navigate his life after losing his dream career in the NBA. With the help of a ridiculous best friend, and Breanna's godfather, Duane, Breanna's best friend, Spirit, and charming, but naive Arnaz, Flex and Breanna try to navigate a world where they see each other for more than two weeks.
October 15: Social Distance (Season 1)
In this anthology series, Orange is the New Black creator Jenji Kohan sets out to explore the different stages of solitary confinement during our mandated social distancing.
October 15: A Babysitter's Guide to Monster Hunting (2020)
This book-turned-film follows a babysitter who travels on a mission to rescue a child taken by monsters.
October 16: Grand Army (2020)

Netflix
This drama series has the diversity you craved while growing up. Being a teenager is hard enough, but it's the least of their problems, in this telling story of five high school students as they navigate sexual, racial, and political identities and hardships.
October 27: Sarah Cooper: Everything's Fine
Best-selling author and comedienne Sarah Cooper flexes her undeniable talent in this forthcoming Netflix variety special that promises viewers "short interviews, sketches, and more shenanigans" will ensue.
October 30: His House (2020)

His House/Netflix
Being a refugee is hard, you have to leave your home, loved ones, and culture behind. Nevertheless, it can only get more complicated when you add a supernatural aspect in every crack and corner of your home. Unfortunately, this couple is in for a ride.
Everything New To Netflix In October 2020: The Complete List
October 1

44 Cats/Netflix
44 Cats (Season 2)
Personally, I find 44 cats to be 44 cats too many, but despite its large number, children can't seem to get enough 44 Cats. Returning for season two, follow the adventures of four kittens who make up the musical group called "The Buffycats". With catchy songs and cute adventures, you and your kids will be thankful for these singing felines.
A.M.I. (2019)
For years, people have been shouting from the highest mountains the negative effects of technology. Despite their shouts, we've listened passively as we stared into our phones. Now, there is another horror movie that tells us the dangers of using too much technology. Artificial Machine Intelligence (A.M.I) tells of a 17-year-old developer whose technology forces her to create murderous acts.
Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls (1995)
Returning for a typical 90s sequel, Jim Carrey reprises the role of legendary pet detective Ace Ventura. After leaving retirement, Ace Ventura must retrieve an endangered white bat from a village in Africa. As you've guessed, it doesn't turn out to be the best of ideas.
All Because of You (2020)
My pathetic, hopeless romantic heart beats wildly for this international film. After falling for a guest, an unsuspecting hotel staffer becomes involved in a hostage scheme and finds love in what even Rihanna herself would consider a hopeless place.
Along Came a Spider (2001)
Like a spider, Alex Cross is willing to take as long as he can to weave the perfect trap. In the psychological thriller, Morgan Freeman, a detective and psychologist, decides to play a psychological game with criminals, but that all changes when he is the one lured into another's web.
An Ordinary Man (2017)
Any time someone is called "ordinary", you can guarantee they'll be anything but. This film is no different. Like a tormented, modernized, live-action version of Beauty and the Beast, a war criminal uses his newly-hired maid to comfort him. Will he continue to abuse her, or will hours alone together turn into something more?
Bakugan: Battle Planet (Season 2)
After Bakugan emerged in a worldwide phenomenon called "Awakening", Dan and friends work with their Bakugan to stop those who enslave, control, and destroy the Bakugan creatures.
Basic Instinct
A story of obsession, this 1990s neo-noir erotic thriller clearly shows why a detective dating the girlfriend of a murder victim, isn't the best of ideas. With the relentless twists and turns, this is a throwback mystery-thriller worth watching this eerie season.
Black ‘47 (2018)
Step aside local mercenaries, the Irish have arrived. Based in 1847, Black '47 focuses on an Irish mercenary who evades his post when revenge for his family is needed.
Cape Fear (1991)
Earning Robert De Niro a nominee for Best Actor, Cape Fear is another psychological thriller for the Halloween season. After going to prison for a crime he didn't commit, Max Cady leaves prison with a promise to get revenge on the person who wronged him.
Carlos Almaraz: Playing with Fire
In honor of Hispanic Heritage Month comes a documentary on a dynamic Mexican-American painter, Carlos Almaraz, and his legacy, 30 years after his death.
Carmen Sandiego (Season 3)
Although it feels like it just premiered yesterday, Carmen Sandiego returns for its third season, with Sandiego traveling the world, fighting internationally. While attempting to solve one problem, Sandiego finds herself entering another when events from her past make her a super thief.
Code Lyoko
As a French-animated series, the story centers around a group of teenagers who travel to a virtual world to stop the threat of an impending virus.
Employee of the Month (2006)
Contrary to the title, this is anything but a movie about an employee wanting to earn the Employee of the Month title. Instead, this is a movie about a guy who meets a girl, and thinks the girl is hot. But, naturally, the girl is uninterested, so the guy tries to get the Employee of the Month title in hopes of impressing and winning the girl. It's a straight to the point comedy, but that doesn't mean you won't release a chuckle or two.
Enemy at the Gates (2001)
As if running away from Nazis isn't bad enough, Russian soldier Vassili must elude a Nazi assassin after being made the face of the Russian's military campaign. Now, with a bigger target on his back, Vassili must survive the war, assassins, and traitorous allies.
Familiar Wife (Season 1)
In this romance, fantasy drama, Cha Joo-hyuk finds himself living a completely different life after he makes a decision that supernaturally impacts his life and the life of everyone around him.
Fargo (1996)
Another eerie drama to add to your list is Fargo. When a salesman finds himself in debt, he plots the kidnapping of his wife in hopes to acquire ransom and alleviate his debt.
Food Wars!: Shokugeki no Soma: The Second Plate
Before you suspect otherwise, no, this is not a cooking show. Nevertheless, this anime will have you on the edge of your seat. Returning for its second season, Soma Yukihira continues his journey through the prestigious Totsuki Culinary Academy.
Ghost Rider (2007)
After selling his soul to save a loved one, Johnny Blaze is called to be an agent of justice. Wherever evil roams, the Ghost Rider is sure to follow. After being sent to destroy the villain, Blackheart, Blaze quickly learns that the road to hell is paved with more than good intentions.
Ghosts of Girlfriends Past (2009)
Just when you thought seeing your ex in public couldn't get worse, Mark Waters made a film about what happens when you can't escape them. One the eve of his brother's wedding, Connor Mead travels through his failed past relationships.
Gran Torino (2008)
Despising his Asian, Latino, and Black neighbors, Walt Kowalski travels on a journey of redemption after saving an Asian teen, Thao Vang Lor, from a group of gangbangers and thieves.
Her (2013)
One of the biggest movies of 2013, Her returns to Netflix. Receiving the Academy Award for Writing, Best Original Screenplay, Her tells the story of a sensitive, newly divorced, hopeless romantic who becomes infatuated with an intuitive operating system, voiced by Scarlett Johansson.
House of 1,000 Corpses (2003)
As a person who believes a house filled with one corpse is too many, House of 1,000 Corpses has me thinking otherwise. Following an ill-fated couple, we travel into the House of 1,000 corpses where individuals lurk around the corner, waiting for their next victims.
Human Nature (2019)
This riveting documentary following the tech revolution known as CRISPR. With CRISPR, human beings have been given the control over the creation of life. From curing disease, to reshaping biospheres, and even designing our own children, this documentary makes for an interesting view. Why? Well, because it's anything but Human Nature.

Hunt for Wilderpeople
Hunt for Wilderpeople (2016)
Taika Waititi has struck again, and it makes you wonder what bleak life you led before his sensational strangeness blessed your screen. Now, you have one more chance to be blessed. Watch as a young boy and his foster father become victims of the Most Dangerous game and have to survive a manhunt on an island in New Zealand.
I'm Leaving Now/Ya Me Voy (2018)
After 16 years away, Felipe decides to return home to Mexico from Brooklyn, New York.
Poseidon (2006)
When a tidal wave overwhelms a cruise, survivors must stick together to overcome the murderous storm.
Secreto bien guardado (Season 1)
Gone too soon, Argentinian drama mini-series is a romance drama set in a novela.
Stranger Than Fiction (2006)
Imagine going through life and having a British woman narrate all of your deepest thoughts, desires, and actions, how would you react? If you answered: negatively, then this movie is just for you. Starring Will Ferrell, an unstable IRS auditor's world is turned upside down, when he becomes the new subject of a novelist's latest work.
Superman Returns (2006)
Before he was the pure-hearted, loveable scientist and Atom, Ray Palmer, in DC's Legend of Tomorrow, Brandon Routh was the "Man of Steel". If you're feeling a little nostalgic or simply looking for the "truth, justice, and American way that was promised," check out Bryan Singer's Superman Returns.
Sword Art Online (Season 3/ Alicization)
Originally a Japanese novel, Sword Art Online returns for its third season as their characters, Kirito and Asuna, continue to compete in virtual realities.
The Dukes of Hazzard (2005)
Their car was named General Lee and their tight pants left nothing to the imagination, The Dukes of Hazzard show good-hearted misfits Bo and Luke Duke, enjoying traveling through rural Hazzard County as the boys get away with practically everything and anything under the sun.
The Longest Yard (1974)
With a nation that loves football the way it does, it was only a matter of time before The Longest Yard returned to Netflix. In it, disgraced football quarterback Paul Crewe joins a team of inmates in this underdog piece.
The Outpost (2020)
If you liked the movie 13 Hours, this military movie might be for you. In this film, U.S soldiers fight Taliban fighters in the retelling of America's bloodiest battle from the Afghanistan War.
The Pirates! Band of Misfits (2012)
In a quest to win the title of Pirate of the Year, the Pirate Captain, sails through rough waters to defeat his enemies and obtain the prize of a lifetime.
The Prince and Me (2004)
The Prince and Me was such a cute movie, they decided to make it four more times. Take a moment to fall in love with the story of a college girl who meets a Prince posing as a normal college student.
The Unicorn (Season 1)
When one hears of Unicorns, they think magic and fairy tales. This show is not that. Though, that doesn't mean it isn't worth watching. In this CBS comedy, Wade and friends try to find a new normal after the death of his wife.
The Worst Witch (Season 4)
In this show, Mildred Hubble finds herself trying to survive the trials and tribulations of Miss Cackle's, witch, Academy.
Troy (2004)
Young Brad Pitt. Homer's Iliad. Let the battle ensue. Enough said.
WarGames (1983)
In search of the newest video game, David Lightman, finds himself on the verge of starting another World War, when he stumbles onto a military supercomputer instead of the new game.
We Have Always Lived in the Castle (2018)
Originally a novel from horror/mystery writer Shirey Jackson, We Have Always Live in the Castle tells the horrors of what happens when a cousin arrives unexpectedly.
Yogi Bear (2010)
Sing it with me ruggers, "I know a bear that you all know!" And yes friends, it's Yogi Bear. Join this silly, cute, and fun live-action telling of Yogi Bear.
You Cannot Hide/ No te puedes esconder (Season 1)
No matter what she tries, Monica just can't catch a break. Watch the action-thriller Spanish television show, about what happens when a survivor of an abusive and criminal husband becomes the target of a hitman.
October 2

Emily in Paris/Netflix
A Chaste Marriage
I've never heard anyone wish their marriages were chaste, and that ladies and gentlemen is where the problem lies. When a guy is forced to marry his childhood best friend, instead of the love of his life, we watch as he decides to settle for his chaste marriage or passionate love affair.
A Go! Go! Cory Carson Halloween (2020)
If you're in the mood for a Halloween film with your little one, but you're in no mood for nightmares, this might be what you're looking for. In search of a king-sized candy bar, Cory Carson Halloween is a cute adventure for all ages.
Dick Johnson is Dead (2020)
That's it. That's the movie. Well, that's the inevitable conclusion of the movie, and now that we know that, follow Dick Johnson as he practices accepting his inevitable demise.
Emily in Paris (Season 1)
In a marketing firm in Paris, Emily has accepted a job to give the American perspective. There, drama ensues while trying to navigate her new world and profession.
Oloture (2019)
Diversify your movie queue with this Nigerian crime drama. When a naïve journalist goes undercover to expose the underground world of human trafficking.
Serious Men (2020)
Tormented with his under-privileged societal status, a father capitalizes on his son's newfound fame. Though, the very thing that might save him, could be destroyed by his own hands.
Song Exploder/Netflix
Song Exploder (Season 1)
Based on the hit podcast, musicians show you their creative process to songwriting, which results in the beautiful tunes that tug on your heart strings or throw you into a fit of rage. Regardless of the emotion it evokes, watch as these artists show you what it's like to be in the studio.
The Binding (2020)
The picture alone for this Italian horror film speaks a thousand words. But in case you're not fluent in Italian, here's a translation: if you like horror movies, this is completely for you. After visiting Southern Italy, a mother fights against the supernatural to stop the demonic claim of her child.
You’ve Got This/ Ahi te encargo (2020)
October 4

Colombiana
Colombiana
After watching a crime lord murder her parents as child, Cataleya joins her contract-killing uncle to avenge her family and finally close the door on her past.
David Attenborough: A Life on Our Planet
A Life on Our Planet is soon to be a thing of the past. Almost like a real horror film, this tells of the impact human beings have had on the planet and where we will go if we don't fix it.
Pat a Pat Como (Season 1)
This Korean animated comedy will keep your little ones laughing and egg-cited for the silly adventures to come.
October 6

StarBeam: Halloween Hero/Netflix
Dolly Parton: Here I Am (2019)
Did you know that Dolly Parton was the original singer of "I Will Always Love You"? No, well if you thought that was interesting, discover more about the career, life, and music of the eminent Dolly Parton.
StarBeam: Halloween Hero (2020)
Here's another cute Halloween show for your little one. And of course, it relates to capturing the monster who steals candy.
October 7
Hubie Halloween (2020)
Starring Adam Sandler and Modern Family's Julie Bowen, a man constantly subjected to the ridicule of his hometown community, finds himself saving Halloween and becoming the prime suspect of a murder investigation.
Schitt's Creek (Season 6)
Stealing the hearts of all, and the Primetime Emmy for every comedic category, Schitt's Creek's final season lands on October 7 to Netflix. Watch the entire series that has everyone grinning from ear to ear.
To the Lake (Season 1)
As if 2020 wasn't stressful enough, watch what happens when civilization faces a plague and must struggle to survive.
October 8

The 100/CW Networks
Palermo Hollywood (2004)
Everyone knows that when you want to commit a crime, you should only hire those who can keep a secret. Well, almost everyone knows. In this film, when a kidnapping scheme goes wrong and a notorious gangster must discover how to cover his tracks after two petty criminals threaten to expose him.
Tanda Tanya
With conflicting religious beliefs, a group must settle their grievances as they undergo the hardships of religious violence.
The 100 (Season 7)
After seven seasons and more than one heartache to handle, The 100 fights its last battle. Following burdened hero Clarke Griffin, The 100 tells the story of 100 juvenile prisoners who were sent back to Earth to determine its inhabitability, three generations after a nuclear war. With strong protagonists, exceptional female characters, and deranged villains, The 100 tells a story that will carry on for generations to come. May we meet again.
October 9
Deaf U (Season 1)
As unexpected insight into the deaf community, follow a Netflix original reality series of deaf college students living a typical college life.
Fast and Furious Spy Racers (Season 2)
Watch out. This is not the Fast and Furious you were expecting, but that doesn't mean it isn't worth the watch. Starring Tyler Posey and the amazing Renee Elise Goldsberry, this animated series focuses on a group of teenagers who deal with an organization hell bent on world domination.
Ginny Weds Sunny (2020)
In this upcoming Hindi romantic comedy, watch as characters Ginny and Sunny wed.
Super Monsters: Dia de los Monsters (2020)
Like the more kid-friendly, animated version of The Descendants, follow the offspring of famous monsters who meet during preschool.
The Haunting of Bly Manor (Season 1)
In his second installment of supernatural, horror dramas, Mike Flanagan recycles stars Victoria Pedretti, Kate Siegel, Oliver Jackson-Cohen, and Henry Thomas to tell a haunting story of a governess hired to look after a man's nieces and nephew in the Bly estate. While there, the governess discovers that the house may be stranger than it seems.
October 12
Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts
Adventure fiction might not be your style, but this beautiful show can make it so. When a sheltered girl is thrown into the real world, after a mutant attack, she must learn how to survive on the surface, while leaving her comfort zone in the ground.
October 13
The Cabin with Bert Kreischer
In a quest to cleanse one's body, mind, and soul, comedian Bert Kreischer escapes the cabin, with comic friends, in the ultimate form of self-care.
Octonauts & the Great Barrier Reef
In this kid's music special, Octonauts must find a way to save his reef from hungry, nefarious worms.
October 14

Alice Junior
Alice Junior (2019)
Follow the journey of this transgender teenager who experiences her first love.
BLACKPINK: LIGHT UP THE SKY (2020)
If you're going through Korean-band withdrawal, join the club. Though, you might be able to relieve that itch with this film about the record-shattering Korean girl band, BLACKPINK.
Moneyball (2011)
Characters of Jonah Hill and Brad Pitt team up to revive their baseball team, by challenging traditions, supporting players, and working around their tight budget.
October 15

Love Like the Falling Rain
Batman: The Killing Joke (2016)
There is no better hero v. villain story than that of Batman and Joker. In this animated film, watch as Joker further pushes Batman, when he kidnaps Commissioner Gordon.
Brave Blue World: Racing to Solve Our Water Crisis (2019)
Honest and optimistic, this documentary tells of the possible opportunities granted through technology that will help how we manage water.
Love Like the Falling Rain (2020)
Nothing is worse than unrequited love. This film shows the pain and suffering one must endure when in love with your best friend. Should he tell her and risk ruining their friendship, or should he continue to pine in silence?
Power Rangers Beast Morphers (Season 2, Part 1)
Despite the time it takes Power Rangers to morph, the show can't help but be lovable. In this new aged Power Rangers, join the rangers as they fight a new-aged computer virus from another dimension.
Rooting for Roona (2020)
This documentary focuses on a baby, Roona Begum, as she fights for her life in India.
October 16
Dream Home Makeover (Season 1)
It's like HGTV and Netflix came together to have a baby and created an inevitably addictive show. With hosts Syd and Shea McGree, follow the 30-minute episodes of the couple creating dream homes.
In a Valley of Violence (2016)
When a short cut becomes anything but, a mysterious drifter and his dog stumble into a valley where, naturally, violence ensues.
La Revolution (Season 1)
What if the French Revolution went differently? What if instead of the French uprising, they died at the hands of nobles overtaken by a murderous virus?
Someone Has to Die/ Alguien tiene que morir (Limited Series)
Not as villainous as its title, the series tells a tale of a young mais summoned home to accept his arranged marriage. Nevertheless, find out what happens when what seems to be a simple arrangement is complicated when he brings a mysterious woman with him.
The Last Kids on Earth (Book 3)
Based on the books of the same name, Jack Sullivan and friends must fight zombies and mutant creatures, all while enjoying their youth.
The Trial of the Chicago 7 (2020)
Based on the notorious 1969 trial of seven, followed the trial that bewildered and bedazzled the nation and questioned the U.S Government. Written by the renowned Aaron Sorkin, this film is sure to be as witty as it is interesting.
Unfriended (2014)
A friendly online group chat, transforms to horror, when an unknown user, Billie227, joins a group of friends.
October 18

ParaNorman
ParaNorman (2012)
Possessing the ability to speak with the dead Norman Babcock lives anything but a normal life. When his uncle tells him of the impending dangers of a witch's curse, Norman must use his paranormal abilities to save the land of the living.
October 19
Unsolved Mysteries (Volume 2)
It's frustrating that the mysteries are unsolved, but it's so damn addicting to watch. Unsolved Mysteries is back for its second volume with more head-scratching, bewildering mysteries.
October 20

Carol (2015)
"Flung out of space," 2016's Carol tells of a 1950s forbidden romance between budding photographer, Therese Belivet (Rooney Mara) and closeted housewife, Carol Aird (Cate Blanchett). Based on the novel The Price of Salt, this romance will have you in awe of the director and Blanchett's picturesque performances.
The Magic School Bus Rides Again The Frizz Connection (2020)
As if Hamilton's Lin Manuel Miranda writing the theme song isn't enough, Ms. Frizz and kids return for another adventure on the magic school bus.
October 21
My Next Guest Needs No Introduction (Season 3)
With already having guests such as President Barack Obama, Tina Fey, and Kanye West, David Letterman returns with his glorious beard and a new line up to die for.
Rebecca (2020)
If you're looking for a horror movie without the gore, this novel-turned-film is sure to capture your attention. Forced to live in her husband's family estate, Mrs. de Winter must uncover the truth about her husband and the wife he once had, Rebecca.
October 22
Bending the Arc (2017)
In hopes of obtaining global health equity, a group of health advocates start a movement to change global health policies for generations to come.
Cadaver (2020)
As if a nuclear disaster weren't enough, a family must deal with the disappearance of guests when they are invited to a "charitable" dinner.
The Hummingbird Project (2018)
In a fiber-optic cable deal, a group of traders hope to earn millions of dollars while competing with their old, more seasoned boss.
Yes, God, Yes (2019)
Like the musical Spring Awakening, this Catholic girl's sexual being is awakened when a friendly conversation online turns hot and heavy.
October 23
Barbarians (Season 1)
German soldiers stop the spread of the Roman empire in the Battle of Teutoburg Forest.
Over the Moon (2020)
With an all-star cast, Phillipa Soo, Kimiko Glenn, Sandra Oh, and John Cho, this animation of a young, Asian girl who builds a rocket ship and meets a goddess on the moon, will make your heart smile.
Perdida (2018)
After the disappearance of her childhood friend, a police officer returns home to find answers. Though, once she gets too close, she finds that she might have to deal with the same fate of her friend. Whatever that may be.
The Queen's Gambit (Season 1)
Embarking on a quest to become the best chess player in the world, Beth Harmon must overcome addiction before she ruins her lifelong dream.
October 27
Blood of Zeus (Season 1)
Formerly known as Gods & Heroes, comes an upcoming original anime about Zeus as he tries to save Heaven and Earth.
Chico Bon Bon: Monkey with a Tool Belt (Season 4)
With tools and his wits, Chico Bon Bon helps solve problems in this animated series.
Guillermo Vilas: Settling the Score/ Vilas: Serás lo que debas ser o no seras nada (2020)
This documentary follows renowned tennis player, Guillermo Vilas, as he tries to obtain the No. 1 world seat, after 40 years of demanding the ranking be revised.
October 28
Holidate (2020)
After one too many "when will you get married," or "are you seeing anyone," during the holidays, the idea of getting a holidate wouldn't be too bad. In this film, Sloane and Jackson agree to be one another's "holidates" during their frustrating holiday seasons.
Metallica Through the Never
If you told me that the rock band Metallica was creating a concert film, I wouldn't have believed you. Nevertheless, here the beauty is.
Nobody Sleeps in the Woods Tonight (2020)
It's a horror film. Though, it is not. This film shows what happens when you take technology-dependent teenagers and place them in a camp that requires they are offline.
Secrets of Saqqara Tomb (2020)
Follow this real-life adventure of an archaeologist who travels to an ancient tomb in Saqqara to unearth the secrets of Egyptain history.
October 30
Somebody Feed Phil (Season 4)
Traveling around the world to taste its exquisite, extraordinary cuisines, Phillip Rosenthal of Everybody Loves Raymond demands to be fed.
Suburra: Blood on Rome (Season 3)
Inspired by true events, this show follows a real-life political scandal as a community fights for land in a coastal town, near Rome.
October 31
The 12th Man (2017)
If we are on the 12th man, you can bet that it didn't fare well for the other eleven. In this film, follow a Norweigen soldier when his anti-Nazi mission goes wrong and leaves him in enemy land.
Featured image by Shutterstock
- New on Netflix October 2020: Movies, TV, Original Series ›
- Here's What's New to Stream in October on Netflix, Hulu, Amazon ... ›
- New on Netflix October 2020: Movies, Shows to Stream | Time ›
- What's New on Netflix in October: The Haunting of Bly Manor, Emily ... ›
- What's New on Netflix in October: The Haunting of Bly Manor, Emily ... ›
- Netflix Originals Coming to Netflix in October 2020 - What's on Netflix ›
- What's new on Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime for October 2020 ... ›
- What's Coming to Netflix in October 2020 - What's on Netflix ›
This Is How To Keep 'Holiday Season Stress' From Infecting Your Relationship
Hmph. Maybe it’s just me, but it seems like there is something really weird happening in the fall season air (because winter doesn’t officially begin until December 21) that cuddle season is in full swing while break-up season is as well. In fact, did you know that break-ups are so popular during the holiday season that December 11 is deemed Break-Up Day?
The reasons why relationships shift around this time vary; however, I did both roll my eyes and chuckle when I read that a very popular one is because it’s an easy way to get out of getting one’s significant other a Christmas present. SMDH.
Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
___
Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Shutterstock
'Constant Reassurance' Is The Relational Orange Flag No One Wants To Address
Read more than scroll. Boy, if there is a motto that I would encourage people to implement, now more than ever in their life, it would be how important it is to read (actual books, researched data and fact-based information) over merely scrolling via social media. Because boy — every time I look out on apps to see what folks are talking about, I don’t know if I’m impressed with or appalled by how many nothing-more-than-emotionalized opinions are so boldly stated when, after five minutes on Google, it’s clear that there are virtually zero facts to back them up.
Not to mention the fact that so many folks literally don’t read (you know, past skimming) anymore — and yes, I have stats to prove it. I recently read that back in 2022, reportedly, a little over 48 percent of people read one book over the course of that entire year (that is not a good thing and proves that book reading is on a steady decline). Meanwhile, the amount of time that is spent on social media: 2.5 hours on a daily basis. That’s 150 minutes of listening to folks just say…whatever. And if you listen to it long enough, you could actually start believing it as gospel.
This includes what I am going to touch on today: the belief that if someone really cares about you, they should constantly reassure you. Y’all damn near are gonna have me join the world of social media again, just to address this one fallacy. For now, though, I’ll settle for making some points via this article — because as you can see from the title, I don’t agree with that conclusion at all.
In fact, I personally believe that thinking this way is a pretty big relational orange — if not red — flag.
Reassurance. And What It Does for a Child.
GiphyIf you’ve read enough of my content, you know that I am big on word definitions — and when it comes to the word “reassurance,” the meaning alone explains why this article has the title that it does:
Reassurance: something, such as information, praise, or an action or gesture, that soothes, comforts, or restores to confidence
Reassurance restores confidence. Bookmark that, please. I will certainly circle back to that point before I am done.
Okay, so when it comes to, say a child, there is absolutely a place for reassurance. That’s because they are still in the process of significant self-development and so they need reassurance in order to feel safe, secure and loved. It’s also a way for them to establish trust in others.
However, did you know that many mental health experts say that if a child deals with, say anxiety, constant reassurance can actually be counterproductive because they can start to rely on external validation to emotionally stabilize them instead of learning how to remain calm and relaxed on their own (yeah, bookmark that too)? Some other ways that constant reassurance can become potentially problematic is it can cause kids to create problems that don’t exist, to overthink and to jump to the wrong conclusions (hmm…very interesting).
And so, already, we’re seeing something pretty interesting, right? Although reassurance has its place, too much of it, even for kids, typically ends up doing more harm than good.
Let’s keep building.
How 'Lack' As a Child Can Manifest As an Adult
GiphyOkay, so we just touched on how constant reassurance can be counterproductive for an anxious child. Now what about when that child grows up? If they never learned how to properly and effectively deal with their anxiety, what then? Well, this is where attachment styles can very easily come into play — especially since one of them is literally called “anxious attachment style.”
Anxious attachment style is rooted in insecurity. It typically stems from experiencing the type of dysfunctional upbringing that resulted in one or both parents being unpredictable or inconsistent in their caregiving approach and techniques. As a result, the child deals with things like fear of abandonment or rejection and, without healing from that, they become an adult who is pretty much the exact same way.
In relationships, it can manifest in them being extra clingy, codependent, super jealous, controlling or — catch it — someone who is always looking for validation and reassurance.
Hmph. Did you catch that? Did you really catch that? Needing constant reassurance in a relationship IS NOT something that should automatically come with a relationship. In fact, if you’re someone who has this type of need or even expectation, there’s a really good chance that what you actually need is therapy — not for your partner to work harder to make you feel better about yourself or the relationship.
Which brings me to my next point.
Relationships Can Be Therapeutic. They Aren’t Therapy, Though.
GiphySomething that some of my clients will tell you that they’ve heard me say, more than once I might add is, “PARENT and PARTNER are not palindromes.” A palindrome is a word (line, sentence, etc.) that is the same whether it is spelled backwards or forwards — and while, of course, parent and partner couldn’t qualify as being that, what I mean is there are far too many people who think that partners should pick up where parents left off and/or dropped the ball — and that is a super unhealthy approach to relationships. Come to think of it, not only is it unhealthy but really unfair as well.
This is exactly why I’m not big on phrases like “the princess treatment” in adult relationships. A princess is the daughter of a king while a queen is the wife of one. For a grown woman to expect a man to do what a father did for her as a child without accepting that as an adult, there are far more responsibilities as a wife that comes into play? Yep, that is toxic thinking.
And you know what? So is expecting your partner to overcompensate for where your father and/or mother didn’t show up in the way that they should have. That is not your partner’s fault, their role or their assignment while dating you. If you feel otherwise, it really is time to speak with a professional who can help you to do a bit of “reprogramming” in your thinking because, for you to feel and/or assume that since your parents didn’t make you feel confident and secure or teach you how to value yourself, your partner should work overtime to make up for it? There is not one thing that is healthy, mature or emotionally solid about having that type of mindset.
And that is why I am also good for saying that, although relationships can be therapeutic (healing), they should never EVER be seen as therapy. Therapists are trained to deal with the mental and emotional challenges that people have. On the other hand, no one should expect their partner to have the knowledge and expertise that professionals do — and while we’re here, partners also shouldn’t trust that someone who needs the assistance of a therapist to become whole (again) would know exactly what steps are required for that to happen.
So yeah, if you’re someone who thinks that being loved means that someone needs to constantly make you feel good about yourself or secure in the relationship — you probably do have an anxious attachment style. See a professional to get that confirmed, though. Because no one should have to make you feel valued or worthy. That is an inside job.
And this brings me to my final point.
It’s Not Fair to Want Someone to Love You More than You Do
GiphyFor this last point, something that Christ once said immediately comes to mind:
“No one puts a piece of unshrunk cloth on an old garment; for the patch pulls away from the garment, and the tear is made worse. Nor do they put new wine into old wineskins, or else the wineskins break, the wine is spilled, and the wineskins are ruined. But they put new wine into new wineskins, and both are preserved.” (Matthew 9:16-18 — NKJV)
A lot of times, Christ spoke in parables because it was easier for people to get where he was coming from (Matthew 13:13). Anyway, along these lines, what would be the point in pouring a liquid into a bottle that has a hole in it? It’s not built to contain and maintain the fluid and so, no matter how delicious the drink may be, no matter how many times it’s poured into the bottle, the bottle is never going to remain full — because it has cracks in it.
BOOKMARK THAT.
My fourth baby’s daddy (check out “Why I Named The Children I Aborted”), while we were in the process of our “exit interview” (which is what I choose to call it) of our dynamic, he said something that has always stayed with me: “Shellie, your biggest problem is you receive compliments are revelations when they should be seen as confirmations.” Hmph. The irony of HIM saying that is kind of a trip and yet, at the time when we were experiencing each other, he was exactly right. I should’ve never had such a low sense of self-worth that whatever a man said to me had me so in awe that I either felt extremely grateful or became super addicted to his validation.
And y’all, that is exactly what needing constant reassurance looks like — because why does someone need to keep telling you that you are beautiful, keep saying that you are wonderful, keep letting you know that they want to be with you — keep restoring your confidence in yourself and in your relationship with them?
In other words, why should they work harder at making you feel good about yourself and solid in your relationship than you are willing to? Isn’t that just like pouring liquid into a broken bottle?
There is someone in my family tree who I had to distance myself from because he kept venting to me about his marriage and the fact that his wife was just like this. Sadly, it was never (and I do mean NEVER) enough that he chose her — whenever she felt some type of way about herself, here she came looking for him to fill her voids. After a couple of years of the nonstop needs for reassurance, he was worn out from doing it and I was exhausted from hearing about it. He was too scared to call her out and she was too unaccountable to get the real help that she needed. Whew. Toxic on top of toxic.
So Shellie, what are you saying — that we shouldn’t expect compliments, affirmations, support and encouragement in our relationships? Chile, if that is what you got out of this, you are choosing to think that way because that couldn’t be further from where I am coming from.
Again, you’ve got to remember what reassurance means: it’s about restoring confidence. A compliment is “an expression of praise, commendation, or admiration” yet if you already know that you are pretty, smart, funny, whatever, someone telling you that isn’t “building your confidence;” it’s cosigning on something that you are already aware of. Encouragement is about inspiring or stimulating someone and so yes, of course, the right partner is going to want to see you win in life and so they are going to offer up influence and motivation to help you — but what if they aren’t there?
Shouldn’t you be able to encourage yourself? ABSOLUTELY. However, expecting them to restore your confidence due to things that have nothing to do with them or because you simply lack self-confidence? That is not how relationships are to go. If you aren’t sure of yourself (which is a foundational definition of confident), get to the root of why and then figure what you need to do to become sure — that way, your partner doesn’t have to constantly “fill you up;” actually, what they do will be surplus instead of void-filling because your “bottle” will be unbroken.
____
I’m telling you, if you pay attention to the relationship side of socials, at least twice a day, someone will talk about how they think that a relationship should entail receiving constant reassurance. Lies on top of lies. No one should think that love means trying to make someone else feel sure about themselves because they don’t know how to do so on their own.
And this is why I say that expecting constant reassurance is an orange, if not red, flag.
Because when you already feel good about yourself, there is no need.
And if you don’t, figuring out how to is an inside job — FIRST.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Shutterstock










