

March begins with us at the tail end of Mercury retrograde which is ending just in time for the spring. Venus is bringing in the blessings this month as she returns home to Taurus on the 4th. The Full Moon in Virgo on the 9th helps us let go of the crap that is holding us back from actualizing our greatest potential.
The astrological new year kicks off when the Sun enters Aries on March 19 restoring us with more vitality, longer days, and warmer weather. Saturn finally shifts gears this month after spending the past couple of years in Capricorn. Towards the end of the month, the New Moon lifts our spirits and Mars inspires us to work towards a better tomorrow.
Check out what's in store for your zodiac sign this month:
Aries
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The month begins with Mercury dipping back into Aquarius giving you the opportunity to reconnect with your friends and social allies. During this time, you'll become even more clear about who will play a key role in helping you achieve your big hopes and dreams. On the same day, Venus moves into Taurus blessing your finances and self-esteem over the next few weeks. Just be mindful of overspending at Ulta Beauty or your favorite boutique. On the 9th, the Full Moon in Virgo encourages you to cut Netflix off and get your lazy ass in the gym. You're encouraged to release some bad habits to prioritize a healthier lifestyle. Messy Mercury finally goes direct on the same day moving back into Pisces. Dejavu, much? Give yourself a couple more weeks to recalibrate from the retrograde weirdness.
Your birthday season officially begins on the 19th and all eyes are on you, making it a perfect time to reveal your new and improved appearance. On the 21st, Saturn finally leaves his home sign of Capricorn to begin his transit through progressive Aquarius. During this transit, you're encouraged to get innovative when it comes to the vision and the impact you want to make on your community. The New Moon on the 24th invites you to set the intention for something you'd like to manifest by the Harvest Full Moon later this fall. March comes to a close with energetic Mars moving into Aquarius amping up the genius content for your social media while also reminding you of the power in numbers. There's no need to do it all alone, Aries. Remember—teamwork makes the dream work.
Taurus
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The beginning of the month gives you a chance to review your strategy when it comes to climbing up the ranks in your career. An important conversation with your supervisor or an influential person can provide you with key information for achieving your goals. On the 4th, your ruling planet, Venus, moves into your sign making you a magnet for money and love. You've got the Midas touch so make the most of these next few weeks. The Full Moon on the 9th is the perfect time to reveal that project or that cute little baby bump you're growing. On the same day, Mercury goes direct and moves into Pisces on the 16th, reviving your mission to make the world a better, and more beautiful, place.
Your world gets a little more private when the Sun moves into Aries on the 19th. Over the next month, prioritize rest and moments of solitude to reflect on your past year. Make an attempt to tie up any loose ends before your birthday season. On the 21st, Saturn moves into Aquarius requiring you to put in a little more effort than usual when it comes to your career advancement. Try to stay 10 steps ahead of the game to rise above the competition. The New Moon on the 24th initiates you into the next phase of your spiritual evolution, reminding you just how powerful your divinity is. On the 30th, Mars moves into Aquarius and gives you extra motivation to expand your professional network, making this a perfect time to create that LinkedIn account.
Gemini
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March kicks off with a quarter moon in your sign on the 2nd, making this your most productive week of the month. On the 4th, your ruling planet dips back into Aquarius, giving you the chance to brush up on your knowledge of a topic of interest. This is also a favorable time to work out any issues with immigration or international affairs. Venus, planet of love and money, moves into Taurus on the same day giving you extra support from the non-physical world. Ask and ye shall receive. On the 9th, a Full Moon in Virgo could bring family matters to a head. Avoid being overly critical of your loved ones (and try not to take it personally if someone is sharing their unsolicited advice). Channel your attention to detail to organizing and cleaning your home instead. On the same day, Mercury goes direct and moves back into Pisces on the 16th and an important conversation at work could give you a promising glimpse into your rise up the career ladder.
The Sun moves into Aries on the 19th making you the center of attention amongst your friends and also inspiring you to reconnect with the bigger vision of your life. This transit encourages you to be a leader in a world full of followers. On the 21st, Saturn leaves behind a grueling two-and-a-half year transit in Capricorn and moves into Aquarius inviting you to expand your knowledge and spiritual awareness. Going back to school, enrolling in a course, or even connecting with a mentor can do wonders for your growth over the next couple of years. The New Moon on the 24th motivates you to take a stand for a cause that is near to your heart. Focus on defining what your mission is to align with your purpose and your soul tribe. The month comes to a close with Mars moving into Aquarius reminding you that there's little truth to everyone's beliefs. Seek to find common ground instead of discrediting other people's experiences.
Cancer
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The first half of the month brings your attention to your inner world and your closest relationships with Mercury going retro in Aquarius. This is a good time to revisit any conversations about shared assets and income. If you've been avoiding Sallie Mae, this may be a good time to arrange a plan to start paying off those student loans. On the same day, Venus moves into Taurus and you're feeling the love from your tribe and maybe even some romance from a secret admirer who wants to be more than friends. The Full Moon on the 9th encourages you to share those beautiful thoughts of yours with the world. Maybe it's time to finally go live on IG or launch that blog. Mercury goes direct on the same day and moves back into Pisces on the 16th. You've got a lot of wisdom to share and some wide-eyed followers that are pining for you to drop some gems.
On the 19th, the Sun moves into Aries, lighting the fire beneath your ass to make some major moves on the career front. As a cardinal sign, you're a natural born leader (even though that may not be the most comfortable role for you). With that being said, taking a leadership development class could win you some brownie points on the job. After spending the past couple of years in Capricorn, Saturn finally enters Aquarius on the 21st, giving you the chance to transform and heal from some karma that's affected your ability to connect with others more intimately. The New Moon on the 24th could land you a new job or promotion that you rightfully deserve. Just get ready for the extra responsibility that comes with this new role. The month ends on a high note with Mars moving into Aquarius helping you understand the bigger picture when it comes to some of your most painful experiences.
Leo
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March kicks off with Mercury dipping back into Aquarius on the 4th giving you the chance to revisit some important plans you and a significant other are making. Renegotiating existing contracts is also favorable during this time. On the same day, Venus moves into Taurus, helping you receive the praise you love so much from your supervisor or someone you look up to professionally. The Full Moon on the 9th helps you push past a mental hang-up that's been wreaking havoc on your self-esteem and possibly your finances as well. Mercury finally goes direct on the same day, moving back into Pisces on the 16th, inviting you to delve deeper into your connections.
It's time to let those guards down to receive the love and healing you deserve.
The Sun enters your sister sign Aries on the 19th, motivating you to expand your awareness. Take a pilgrimage to a place, check out a seminar, or go back to school to enhance your wisdom. You may even consider teaching others about a topic of expertise. On the 21st, Saturn begins its transit through Aquarius giving you a chance to clear up some relationship karma. *cues Erykah Badu's "Next Lifetime"* The New Moon on the 24th inspires you to pave your own lane when it comes to your spiritual evolution. Recognize the guru within you. Towards the end of the month, you're feeling motivated to secure a more solid relationship or business partnership with someone that shares your vision.
Virgo
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The beginning of the month draws your attention towards your physical and mental wellness. It's time to revamp your daily routine so it's more supportive of your health. On the same day, Venus moves into Taurus, bringing you fortune and blessings in the form of a much-needed vacation. You could also receive opportunities to share your expertise on a bigger platform. On the 9th, the Full Moon in your sign encourages you to show the world what you've got. Your ruling planet Mercury goes direct on the same day then moves into Pisces on the 16th, giving you the chance to renegotiate the terms of a contract or to heal a significant relationship.
On the 19th, the Sun moves into Aries helping you feel empowered and ready to overcome any psychological obstacles that stand in the way of your success. This is also a good time to resolve your fears of stepping into a role of leadership. After spending the past couple years in Capricorn, Saturn finally shifts into Aquarius on the 21st, helping you get more innovative in your approach to your physical wellness. Over the next couple of years, you may be challenged to release some bad habits that aren't supportive of your health, wealth, or happiness. On the 24th, the lively New Moon could align you with some much-needed financial support, making this the perfect time to apply for that business loan. The month comes to a close with Mars moving into Aquarius, motivating you to devote more energy to acts of service and making the world a better place.
Libra
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March begins with Mercury dipping back into Aquarius, inviting you to reconnect with a creative project or hobby. Your ruling planet, Venus, moves into Taurus on the same day, helping you attract financial support from people that value your expertise and drive. When it comes to romance, you'll be spending plenty of time indulging in the sensual pleasures of life. The Full Moon on the 9th helps you resolve the battle with your own inner critic. Pay close attention to your dreams for signs and synchronicities around this time. On the same day, Mercury goes direct then moves into Pisces on the 16th, making this a good time to schedule your annual health screening.
On the 19th, the Sun moves into Aries making your relationships the top priority over the next month. This is a promising time to establish a more solid commitment or to business partnership. Saturn, Lord of Karma, moves into Aquarius on the 21st, helping you clear out some creative and romantic blockages. On the 24th, the New Moon lands you an opportunity to connect with someone that supports your mission and wants to play a role in helping you accomplish your goals. With spring finally here, you'll likely be restless for some adventure once Mars moves into Aquarius on the 30th. Now that Mercury is finally direct, this would be the perfect time to gather your girls for a road trip.
Scorpio
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Family matters are your top priority in the first part of the month and you may be asked to play mediator in an ongoing conflict (unless you're the one in the middle of it). On the same day, Venus moves into Taurus giving you the grace you need to bring harmony to the situation. The Full Moon on the 9th encourages you to reassess your social circle and detox where necessary. Mercury goes direct on the same day and you're even more clear about who you're no longer in alignment with. On the 16th, Mercury moves into Pisces helping you tap into the infinite source of creativity. If you've got an audition around this time, you're sure to stand out amongst the competition.
The Sun moves into Aries on the 19th shifting your attention to your health. It's time to whip that Winter body into shape for the Summer. You're feeling more motivated than you have in a while making this an ideal time to make those lifestyle changes that will improve your overall well-being. On the 21st, Saturn moves into Aquarius getting you tapped into the wisdom & guidance of your ancestors. Over the next couple of years, you'll experience major breakthroughs in generational karma as you establish a more authentic way of existing in the world. Family planning and property investment may also be a big focus. On the 24th, the New Moon motivates you to be of service to the collective which requires you to step into your own unique style of leadership. On the 30th, Mars moves into Aquarius reminding you to see the bigger picture as you create your family's legacy through the impact you make on the world.
Sagittarius
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March starts off quietly on the tail end of Mercury retrograde drawing your attention towards your inner world. You may feel more inclined to focus on a personal project or dive into some research about a social cause of interest. On the 4th, Venus enters Taurus, helping you attract good fortune in the workplace. This placement is notorious for overindulging so be mindful of backtracking on your New Year resolution to lay off the sweets or the wine. The Full Moon on the 9th is fit for celebrating your latest career achievement. If you're feeling stuck in your professional development, this energy can illuminate how you're potentially sabotaging yourself. On the same day, Mercury goes direct then moves into Pisces to help you smooth out friction amongst the household or family members.
On the 19th, the Sun moves into Aries inviting you to indulge in more romance, creativity, and play, making this a great time to start a new project or reconnect with a childhood hobby. After spending the past couple of years in Capricorn, Saturn transitions into Aquarius on the 21st. During this transit, you're invited to restructure the way you communicate and connect with others. Building a social media presence may be one of your top priorities and the easiest way to get your voice heard. The New Moon on the 24th encourages you to put yourself out there when it comes to love. Don't be afraid to seize the moment! March comes to a close with energetic Mars moving into Aquarius, making it the perfect time for some Spring Break fun.
Capricorn
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March kicks off with you renegotiating your contract with your employer or adjusting your rates for your services. Either way it goes, your prices are going up. On the 4th, Venus moves into Taurus, bringing you good fortune and lots of romance. Pluto and Saturn have been giving you enough shit, so enjoy the blessings of this transit. The Full Moon on the 9th encourages you to always be curious and open to change which could result in you parting ways with some old beliefs that don't support the direction you're going in. Trust yourself, Cappie. There is no guru outside of you. On the same day, Mercury goes direct in Aquarius before moving forward into Pisces on the 16th which has you deep in your feels. Channel your emotions into your art instead of your Twitter timeline, please.
On the 19th, the Sun moves into Aries which brings your attention to home and family. This energy can be impatient and ready to pop off, so practice a little extra patience with your loved ones over the next few weeks. Your ruling planet, and the thorn in everyone's side, finally moves out of your sign and into Aquarius on the 21st. This next Saturn transit gives you the opportunity to clear up karma related to your self-worth and finances which is ultimately aligning you with greater prosperity to come over the next couple of years. On the 24th, the New Moon invites you to be a pioneer in your family. Don't be afraid to live the wildest dreams your ancestors only imagined. The month comes to an end with Mars getting you focused on increasing your flow of income and impacting the world for the greater good.
Aquarius
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The month begins with Mercury dipping back into your sign mid-retrograde. If anyone is getting random texts from their ex(es), it'll be you. On the 4th, Venus moves into Taurus and love matters take on a more private approach. You'll likely just want to cuddle up with bae in the comfort of your own home. On the 9th, the Full Moon liberates you from the torment of your inner critic and maybe even the nightmares of that overbearing, judgmental person that you never felt good enough for. Mercury goes direct on the same day then transitions into Pisces on the 16th making this an ideal time to partake in some money magic or listen to your fav prosperity affirmations.
On the 19th, the Sun moves into Aries and your social media presence is getting a boost thanks to your bold approach in communication. Stop playing modest and flex that genius mind, and mouthpiece, of yours. Saturn, Lord of Karma, moves into your sign on the 21st restructuring the way you express yourself and engage with the world around you. By the end of this transit, you'll feel like a totally new, and much wiser, person. The New Moon on the 24th encourages you to launch that blog or podcast. All inhibitions go out the window when Mars moves into your sign on the 30th granting you just the courage you need stand proudly in your truth.
Pisces
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March begins with Mercury briefly visiting Aquarius before moving back into your sign on the 16th. On the 4th, Venus moves into Taurus, landing you a lot of attention via social media and dating apps. The Full Moon on the 9th can illuminate how you sabotage your relationships, and yourself, by constantly playing the role of captain save-a-hoe. Boundaries are your saving grace. Don't be afraid to say "no" to a person or opportunity that needs too much fixing. On the same day, Mercury goes direct and you're feeling more comfortable expressing some of the insights you gained during your brief hiatus. On the 16th, people are hanging on your every word and you've got the power to heal the masses, or at least the people that value your wisdom.
On the 19th, the Sun moves into Aries which is a nice boost for your self-esteem. Stop playing humble and recognize just how talented you are. There are so many ways for you to make money and it's time for you to boldly pursue a secret dream of yours. On the 21st, Saturn moves into Aquarius where it'll spend the next couple of years dissolving subconscious patterns and karmic contracts that are blocking you from fully stepping into your destined path. The New Moon on the 24th instills the courage that you need to go for it. March comes to a close with Mars moving into Aquarius, giving you a chance to reconnect with your vision and your conviction more than ever before.
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Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney & Jill Marie Jones On 'Games Women Play' & Dating Over 40
What do you get when you mix unfiltered truths, high-stakes romance, and a few well-timed one-liners? You get Games Women Play—the sizzling new stage play by Je’Caryous Johnson that’s part relationship rollercoaster, part grown-woman group chat.
With a powerhouse cast that includes Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney, Jill Marie Jones, Carl Payne, Chico Bean, and Brian J. White, the play dives headfirst into the messy, hilarious, and heart-wrenching games people play for love, power, and peace of mind. And the women leading this story? They’re bringing their whole selves to the stage—and leaving nothing behind.
From Script to Spotlight
The road to Games Women Play started over 20 years ago—literally.
“This script was written 20 years ago,” Jill Marie Jones said with a smile. “It was originally called Men, Money & Gold Diggers, and I was in the film version. So when Je’Caryous called me to bring it to the stage, I was like, ‘Let’s go.’” Now reimagined for 2025, the play is updated with sharp dialogue and modern relationship dynamics that feel all too real.
Demetria McKinney, no stranger to Je’Caryous Johnson’s productions, jumped at the opportunity to join the cast once again. “This is my third time working with him,” she shared. “It was an opportunity to stretch. I’d never been directed by Carl Payne before, and the chance to work with talent I admire—Jill, Claudia, Chico—it was a no-brainer.”
Claudia Jordan joked that she originally saw the role as just another check. “I didn’t take it that seriously at first,” she admitted. “But this is my first full-on tour—and now I’ve got a whole new respect for how hard people work in theater. This ain’t easy.”
Modern Love, Stage Left
The play doesn’t hold back when it comes to the messier parts of love. One jaw-dropping moment comes when a live podcast proposal flips into a prenup bombshell—leaving the audience (and the characters) gasping.
Demetria broke it down with honesty. “People don’t ask the real questions when they date. Like, ‘Do you want kids? How do you feel about money?’ These convos aren’t happening, and then everyone’s confused. That moment in the play—it’s real. That happens all the time.”
Jill chimed in, noting how the play speaks to emotional disconnect. “We’re giving each other different tokens of love. Men might offer security and money. Women, we’re giving our hearts. But there’s a disconnect—and that’s where things fall apart.”
And then Claudia, of course, took it all the way there. “These men don’t even want to sign our prenups now!” she laughed. “They want to live the soft life, too. Wearing units, gloss, getting their brows done. We can’t have nothing! Y’all want to be like us? Then get a damn period and go through menopause.”
Dating Over 40: “You Better Come Correct”
When the conversation turned to real-life relationships, all three women lit up. Their experiences dating in their 40s and 50s have given them both clarity—and zero tolerance for games.
“I feel sexier than I’ve ever felt,” said Jill, who proudly turned 50 in January. “I say what I want. I mean what I say. I’m inside my woman, and I’m not apologizing for it.”
Demetria added that dating now comes with deeper self-awareness. “Anybody in my life is there because I want them there. I’ve worked hard to need nobody. But I’m open to love—as long as you keep doing what got me there in the first place.”
For Claudia, the bar is high—and the peace is priceless. “I’ve worked hard for my peace,” she said. “I’m not dating for food. I’m dating because I want to spend time with you. And honestly, if being with you isn’t better than being alone with my candles and fountains and cats? Then no thanks.”
Channeling Strength & Icon Status
Each actress brings something different to the play—but all of them deliver.
“I actually wish I could be messier on stage,” Claudia joked. “But I think about my grandmother—she was born in 1929, couldn’t even vote or buy a house without a man, and didn’t give a damn. She was fearless. That’s where my strength comes from.”
For Jill, the comparisons to her iconic Girlfriends character Toni Childs aren’t far off—but this role gave her a chance to dig deeper. “If you really understood Toni, you’d see how layered she was. And Paisley is the same—misunderstood, but strong. There’s more to her than people see at first glance.”
Demetria, who juggles singing and acting seamlessly, shared that live theater pushes her in a new way. “Every moment on stage counts. You can’t redo anything. It’s a different kind of love and discipline. You have to give the performance away—live, in the moment—and trust that it lands.”
Laughter, Lessons & Black Girl Gems
The show has plenty of laugh-out-loud moments—and the cast isn’t shy about who steals scenes.
“Chico Bean gets a lot of gasps and laughs,” Claudia said. “And Naomi Booker? Every scene she’s in—she’s hilarious.”
But the play isn’t just about humor. It leaves space for reflection—especially for Black women.
“I hope we get back to the foundation of love and communication,” said Demetria. “A lot of us are in protector mode. But that’s turned into survival mode. We’ve lost softness. We’ve lost connection.”
Claudia agreed. “We’re doing it all—but it’s not because we want to be strong all the time. It’s because we have to be. And I just want women to know: You can have peace, you can be soft. But stop bringing your old pain into new love. Don’t let past heartbreak build walls so high that the right person can’t climb over.”
Final Act: Pack the House
If there’s one thing this cast agrees on, it’s that this play isn’t just entertainment—it’s necessary.
“Atlanta is the Black entertainment hub,” Claudia said. “We need y’all to show up for this play. Support the arts. Support each other. Because when we pack the house, we make space for more stories like this.”
Games Women Play is more than a play—it’s a mirror. You’ll see yourself, your friends, your exes, and maybe even your next chapter. So get ready to laugh, reflect, and maybe even heal—because the games are on.
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Be Careful. Those Casual Friendships Can Be Red Flags Too.
A couple of weeks ago, I was listening to someone vent about an area of frustration that they couldn’t seem to get to the root of — why they keep getting taken advantage of by certain individuals. When you’ve been a life coach for as long as I have (and you were a journalist before that), you learn how to ask certain questions that can cause people to consider things that they may never have before.
So, when I asked her, “What is the common thread with all of those folks? And sit still for two minutes before answering,” when she finally heard her own self speak, her eyes got wide and her mouth dropped open: “They’re all people who I’m not really sure what they are in my life.”
Ding. Ding. DING.
A life coach by the name of Thomas Leonard once said that “Clarity affords focus” and, believe you me, when it comes to dealing with other human beings, if you don’t get clear on where you stand when it comes to your interactions with them, you can very easily find yourself “focusing too much” on those who don’t deserve it and too little on those who absolutely do. And y’all, this lil’ PSA couldn’t be more relevant than when it comes to what I call “casual friendships.”
Let’s dig — and for some of us, dig our way out of — what it means to have a casual friend, so that you can get clear on if you really need those in your life…and if so…why?
Article continues after the video.
It Can’t Be Said Enough: Always Remember What “Casual” Means
There’s a reason why I decided to share two videos by mental health coach Isaiah Frizzle at the top and bottom of this article. It’s because a lot of what he shares in both of them complements a piece that I wrote for the platform last year entitled, “This Is Just What Purposeful Relationships Look Like.”
It’s the author M. Scott Peck who once said, “Until you value yourself, you won't value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it” and please believe that the older (and hopefully more mature) you get, the more you tend to see just how valuable — and fleeting — time is; and that is what plays a huge role in motivating you want to only involve yourself with people, places, things and ideas that will honor your time — and when something is casual? In my opinion, it’s highly debatable that it’s worth much of your months, days, hours, or even too many of your minutes.
The main reason why is addressed in an article that I wrote back in the day entitled, “We Should Really Rethink The Term 'Casual Sex.'” The gist? When it comes to relationships, “casual” is certainly not a favorite word of mine because I know what it means. Have mercy — why would you want to invest your time, energy, and emotions into something that is, by definition, apathetic, indifferent, careless, lacking emotional intimacy, and/or is without purpose?
I don’t know about y’all but that sounds like a complete and total crap shoot to me — especially if you are going to go so far as to consider this type of dynamic a true friendship (check out “Ever Wonder If A Friend Is Just...Not That Into You?,” “6 Signs You're About To Make A Huge Mistake In Making Them A Close Friend,” “5 Signs Of A Toxic Friendship That Is Secretly Poisoning Your Life,” “12 Friend Facts That Might Cause You To Rethink (Some Of) Your Own,” and “Less & Less Of Us Have Close Friends These Days. Why Is That?” ).
To me, when you decide to call someone “friend,” it means that they are loyal, reliable, consistent, trustworthy and willing to be there to support you to the very best of their ability — even if it’s inconvenient to do so sometimes (check out “Life Taught Me That True Friendships Are 'Inconvenient'”). How in the world can you expect that from something that has the word “casual” in it?
And you know what? That actually segues into my next point about casual friendships pretty darn well.
Ponder the Purpose “Casual Friends” Serve in Your Life
A couple of years ago, Verywell Mind published an article entitled, “How the 4 Types of Friendship Fit Into Your Life.” The four that it listed were acquaintances (which I actually don’t consider to be friends; check out “6 Differences Between A Close Acquaintance And An Actual Friend”), casual friends, close friends, and lifelong friends. After reading the piece, I think they consider casual friends to be the “pleasure” friends that I mentioned in the article, “According To Aristotle, We Need ‘Utility’, ‘Pleasure’ & ‘Good’ Friends.”
And although I certainly get that, I think my “cause for pause” is calling those people “friends” when they probably should be called something like an associate or possibly even a buddy instead. Why do I feel this way? Well, I’ve shared in other articles that I think social media has jacked up vocabulary words and their true meaning on a billion different levels.
Take “friend,” for example. Facebook had us out here calling everyone we connected to on their platform “friends” when some of them, we’ve never even spoken to before — and I personally think that influenced, affected and perhaps even infected our psyche to the point where we will call folks, both online and off, “friend” even when they haven’t earned it and/or who possibly don’t deserve it.
That said, do I think that we all could use lighthearted interactions that don’t go very deep and are filled with not much more than fun? Sure. However, if we were to move this over into a sexual thing — those types of people would probably be called a sneaky link, and there is nothing significant or substantial about ‘em. In fact, if anything pretty much automatically comes with an expiration date, sneaky links would have to be it.
And that’s kind of the point that I’m trying to make about a casual friend — so long as you know that the word “casual” is being used to describe them, while you may enjoy the people who fit that bill, they aren’t really anything that you can or even should fully rely on. Instead, take them for what they are and don’t really expect much more than that. Otherwise, you could be in for some profound levels of disappointment. And who wants that?
Final point.
How a Casual Friend Can Become a Huge Red Flag
I’m telling you, y’all gonna quit clowning Tubi. LOL. To me, the best way to describe it is it’s the Cricket of current streaming apps. What I mean by that is, back when Cricket (the cell phone service) first came out, people, like me, who used it service got incessantly clowned because it was seen as a bootleg provider. Now it’s owned by AT&T, and as someone who has rocked with them since I was in my 20s, I don’t have one regret for doing so. Cricket has always been good to me, chile.
And Tubi? Well, when you get a chance, check out CNBC’s article, “CEO at 33, Tubi’s Anjali Sud on success hacks she learned at Amazon, IAC on way to top of Fox streaming” — take note of the moves the streaming app is making and the quality of programming that is transpiring in real time.
Anyway, I find myself bringing up Tubi more and more in my content because it helps to amplify some of the points that I like to make. This time, it’s a movie that’s (currently) on there calledRight Man, Wrong Woman. If you haven’t seen it before, I don’t want to give too much of the film away. What I will say is that the main female character, she had a casual friend and then she had a close friend.
That casual friend—the one who liked to kick it all of the time—was a lot of fun; however, dealing with her came with a ton of semi-unforeseen consequences. Meanwhile, the close friend? She’s what the Aristotle article (that I mentioned earlier) would call the “good friend” because she tried her best to hold her friend accountable.
And really, it shouldn’t be a shock that the casual friend turned out to be a plum trip because if someone is loads of entertainment and pleasure and yet they are indifferent towards you, they make careless decisions around you and/or they don’t really make known the purpose for you being in their life other than to pass some time — where really do you and that person have to go past drinks after work or dinner on a rooftop restaurant from time to time? And if that is all that the two of you are doing, again, why are they deserving of the word “friend”?
Hmph and don’t get me started on the lack of reciprocity that typically transpires when it comes to dealing with people like this because, while they won’t mind you spending your coins on them, taking their calls in the middle of the night or listening to all of their issues — when it comes time for them to show up for you, they very well may gaslight you into thinking that you are being dramatic, clingy or “doing the most.” Why? Well, it’s mostly because the two of you never really established what the hell the both of you are to one another.
And so, while you’re somewhere taking them seriously, they are out here seeing you casually, and as much as it might hurt to hear, that doesn’t automatically or necessarily make them a bad person. You shouldn’t expect much where no clarity is involved. After all, casual is just that: CASUAL.
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I’m hoping that you can now see why I entitled this piece in the way that I did. It’s because a red flag is pretty much a warning, and to me, a casual friend is about as big of an oxymoron (again, to me) as casual sex is. Friends and sex are both too intimate to be seen or treated casually. Oh, but if you step out and take that risk, you could find yourself getting far more involved than the other individual ever wanted to go, because casual is how things have always been. “Friend” was simply to get you more mentally and emotionally invested. SMDH.
American columnist Walter Winchell once said, “A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.” A wise person once said, “One good friendship will outlive forty average loves." Former President Ulysses S. Grant once said, “The friend in my adversity I shall always cherish most. I can better trust those who helped to relieve the gloom of my dark hours than those who are so ready to enjoy with me the sunshine of my prosperity.” Does any of this sound casual to you? Yeah, me neither.
Again, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t have people in your life who aren’t on deep levels. I’m just saying that you might want to consider putting them into another category than friend, because what friends do for people? There ain’t nothin’ even remotely casual about it, sis. Not even a lil’ bit.
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