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Your Hands And Feet Need This From You All Summer Long
Question: While you’re (hopefully) in the midst of planning for some kind of summer vacation, some outdoor activities, and/or some creative summer-themed dates, what’s your plan for your hands and your feet? I mean, they’re gonna be front and center too — and you’d be amazed how many people have told me over the years that something they notice first on someone is the condition of both; that folks who take care of their hands and feet send the message that self-care is a priority to them.
I would be inclined to totally agree. That’s why I thought it would be a good idea to share a few tips on things that you can do to take extra good care of your hands and feet this summer. That way, you’ll feel great from hand to toe (get it) while giving people another reason to do a double take whenever you come around (hmph…as if you needed one).
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HANDS: A Manicure
I need to get more manicures. Back before the pandemic, I was religious about it; however, after going over a year without getting my nails professionally done, it started to be less of a priority. In some ways, it shows because my cuticles have a way of becoming dry which can, in turn, make them raggedy as hell. Plus, although I do okay when it comes to shaping my nails (I like to keep them natural and low), there really is nothing like a professional shaping them. Professional manicures can handle all of this, plus they give you an expert’s touch when it comes to cleaning your nails, moisturizing your hands, and polishing them perfectly.
So, even if you can’t afford a professional mani every month, at least treat yourself to a couple of ‘em before the summer ends (which is technically September 23rd this year; it’s never Labor Day Weekend). If you want to do some upkeep in between your manicure appointments, a YouTube video that can help you out is located here.
FEET: A Pedicure
On the flip side, something that I never let up on is a professional pedicure, although my nail tech has been letting me have it lately for not giving my toes a break when it comes to constantly having polish on them (because that can weaken nails over time if you’re not careful; it’s a good idea to take breaks for a couple of months once a year).
The main reason why I like professional pedicures is it gives me a chance to relax and treat myself, although some other benefits are a pedicure prevents ingrown toenails, keeps my heels nice and smooth, gets calluses off of the sides of my baby toes and exfoliates my legs and feet. Some other bonuses are pedicures can help to increase blood circulation and reduce stress levels, not to mention, your feet will look so much better in your flip-flops and sandals.
Again, even if you can’t go once a month, try to schedule at least one appointment this summer. And, as I did with the manicures, a YouTube video for how to perform a pretty stellar pedicure from the comfort and convenience of your own home is located here.
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HANDS: An Olive Oil Soak
Remember how I mentioned that the main cause of bad cuticles is dryness? Something that can prevent your cuticles from looking crazy while also making sure that your hands are super soft is to treat your hand to an oil soak. My personal favorite is extra-virgin olive oil. Why should you go the “extra” route? Because that kind of oil is the least processed which means you will receive the most antioxidants and nutrients from the oil, including fatty acids and vitamin E.
Your best bet would be to pour some warm oil (you can zap some in the microwave for about 10 seconds) into a couple of bowls and soak your clean hands in them for 15-20 minutes before blotting them dry with a microfiber towel. However, another approach would be to rub some of the oil onto your hands, making sure to focus on your nails and cuticles and then wrapping them up in either some Saran Wrap or a pair of moisturizing gloves (more on those in a bit) for the amount of time that it would take to watch a 30-minute sitcom.
Whichever route you take, it will be well worth the investment. Your hands will instantly feel amazing and look younger too.
FEET: A Listerine Soak
If you don’t already own a foot spa/tub, let this inspire you to purchase one. And if you’ve only thought that a bottle of Listerine would work on your mouth, let this totally broaden your perspective. Although there is no official scientific data to support this claim, there are many people who sing the praises of using Listerine (specifically) as a foot soak. Why? Well, due to the potent antibacterial, antioxidant, and antifungal properties that it contains, they say that soaking their feet in the solution helps to remove calluses, cracked heels, and even athlete’s foot.
I have tried this method a couple of times, and I will say that it made using a pumice stone on my heels a helluva lot easier to do. Plus, the menthol from the mouthwash feels really invigorating. A couple of YouTubers who are not only fans of this soak but can also walk you through some DIY tips are located here and here.
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HANDS: Tea Tree Oil
If you’re looking for an essential oil that is potent when it comes to antibacterial, anti-inflammatory, antiviral, and antifungal properties, you’re not gonna get much better than tea tree oil, chile. Personally, I use it as a spot treatment for period pimples (it works like a charm!), although it also soothes the scalp if it’s irritated by dandruff or dry skin. What makes tea tree oil beneficial for your hands is it relieves itchiness, soothes irritation that may be associated with eczema or psoriasis, speeds up the healing process of a cut, wound, fungal infection, or bug bite, and can help to prevent dry skin too. It also is a great ingredient for DIY hand sanitizer.
FEET: White Vinegar
If you’re used to using white vinegar to clean your mirrors or wash your fabrics, it might surprise you to know that it’s also good for your skin, including your feet. The antifungal and antibacterial properties in white vinegar will fight the bacteria that cause acne, can keep the pH levels in your skin balanced, soften the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles, be used as a toner, and can soothe your legs after shaving them.
What makes them a wonderful addition to your feet is it helps to remove warts, get rid of foot odor and heal dry feet too. All you need to do is add one-part white vinegar to two parts warm water and let them soak for 15 minutes. Oh, and if you’re worried about the scent, the smell typically fades once the solution dries. Also, you can add some of your favorite essential oil to the soak to make the smell of the vinegar less potent.
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HANDS: Glass Nail File
Even though I will die on the hill that no one can shape nails quite like professional nail techs can (especially when it comes to doing it in a shorter amount of time), I will say that something that has helped me to shape mine better (when I’m in a pinch) is a glass nail file.
What makes them better than traditional ones? A few things, actually. Glass nail files are easy to clean and sterilize, last longer, are gentle on fragile or brittle nails, and, perhaps the best part is, they work on both natural as well as acrylic nails. Amazon has a myriad of affordable ones to choose from here.
FEET: Pumice Stone or Foot Scraper
If it seems like you can’t get rid of rough calluses or dead skin build-up no matter how much you try, I’d first try a pumice stone on skin that has been soaked in some warm water for 10 minutes or so. If that doesn’t work, take things up a notch and get yourself a foot scraper. Long story short, they are the ultimate kind of foot exfoliator. That’s because they are specifically designed to get rid of rough skin.
Just make sure that you go with one that works well on wet and dry skin and that you don’t overdo it (once a week should be more than enough). The key is to remove dead skin, not rub all of your skin off. For this one, I’m gonna shout out a particular kind of scraper; it’s called the Colossal Innovative Nano Glass Callus Remover Foot File. It’s affordable, effective, and safe, as well as waterproof. You’re welcome. #wink
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HANDS: DIY Scrub
Something that comes with aging is the fact that our skin’s cell turnover slows down quite a bit. What that boils down to is it’s easier for dead skin cells to accumulate and make our skin look dry and dull. That’s just one of the billions of reasons why it’s a good idea to exfoliate— especially your hands because they have a way of accumulating dirt, gunk, and dead skin cells like no other.
A really simple yet mad effective DIY hand scrub consists of ½ cup of brown sugar, one tablespoon of coconut oil, one teaspoon of honey, and a half teaspoon of sea salt. Wash your hands, leave them damp, apply the scrub, massage gently for 1-2 minutes, then rinse with first warm and then cool/cold (to seal up your pores) water. If you do this 2-3 times a week, your hands will both look and feel absolutely wonderful.
FEET: DIY Peel
I don’t know how or why YouTube ended up putting chemical peels into my feed but have mercy. There is one, in particular (here) that I watched that low-key freaked me out. They look like they work, but I don’t think I have nearly the patience to wait for the process to end (kudos to sis who did!).
I will say that the final results did remind me that a foot peel can be a good idea too. They are another skincare option that will help to remove calluses, get rid of dead skin, and keep your heels from almost starting fires in your bed at night — and yes, you can do these at home.
From what I’ve read, it takes like a week to get the full results that you’re after, so you probably should avoid doing this right before taking a trip and, instead, over a long weekend or something. Anyway, Glamour has a list of great foot peel options here, and Byrdie has its own list going on here.
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HANDS: Moisturizing Gloves
If you want your hands to be uber-soft and smooth, you definitely need to invest in a couple of moisturizing gloves. The main purpose that they serve is to help to keep moisturizer, oil, sunscreen, or whatever you’re using to pamper your hands on for much longer than you would without them. Some other perks include the fact that they help to reduce skin irritation, are comfortable to sleep in, and are big-time effective at providing extra hydration to your hands and nails. Byrdie has a list of different ones, along with the pros and cons of each, that you can check out here.
FEET: Silicone Socks
I must admit that I’m actually preaching to the choir when it comes to the importance of owning a pair of silicone socks. If you want to prevent chaffing, heal cracked heels, reduce moisture (which can lead to fungal growth and infections if you’re not careful), and even keep blisters from becoming an issue, wearing silicone socks in your house is a smart move to make. Something else that’s (pardon the pun) cool about them is since they are waterproof, you can use them all year long, especially if you want something to provide a barrier for your boots or ski gear during the wintertime.
All you’ve got to do is wash your feet, dry them, apply your foot gel or moisturizer of choice, and put the socks on. That’s it. Your feet will be so thankful that you did (check out some of Amazon’s silicone sock collection here).
HANDS AND FEET: Sunscreen
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One of the biggest mistakes that our people tend to make is not using sunscreen. For one thing, everyone is susceptible to skin cancer, plus sunscreen helps to prevent things like hyperpigmentation and premature aging. And as far as your hands and feet go, because they both tend to be exposed to damaging UV rays longer than the other parts of your body, you definitely need to tend to them in this manner.
As far as narrowing down a sunscreen that will complement you best, Oprah Daily did you a solid by publishing “The 19 Best Sunscreens for Dark Skin Tones That Don't Leave a White Cast.” Make the time to skim the list.
HANDS AND FEET: Top Coat Every 2-3 Days
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Since I am pretty hard on my feet (mostly because I walk around barefoot whenever I’m home and my floors are hardwood), sometimes the polish on my big toe will chip in between pedi appointments. When I go to get a fresh coat, my nail tech will always say that she needs to put a new top coat on all of my toes so that they will shine as much as the polish on my big toe does.
I have actually adapted that practice as an at-home nail-refreshing tip, period. Yep, if you want your manis and pedis to look fresher and last longer, applying a new layer of top coat a couple of times a week should do the trick for you.
HANDS AND FEET: Fruit Salad
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Hydration is something that your body always needs, yet all the more during the summer season — your hands and feet included. That said, some fruits that are in season right now include watermelon, strawberries, peaches, blackberries, mangoes, cherries, papaya, cantaloupe, honeydew, and grapefruit. Since many of them are easily made up of at least 85 percent water, along with other nutrients, how could you go wrong with enjoying a fresh fruit salad at least a couple of times a week? It’s a deliciously healthy way to love on your hands and feet all summer long. Enjoy!
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Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next June (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at missnosipho@gmail.com. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
Skylar Marshai Talks Hair Reset With SheaMoisture Bond Repair 'Revive & Thrive' Campaign
This article is in partnership with SheaMoisture
Skylar Marshai is known for her extravagant style, and her hair is no exception. But now, she’s giving her hair a break and focusing on hair care with SheaMoisture’s Bond Repair Collection. “I feel like my hair has always been an extension of my storytelling because I know it's so innately linked to my self-expression that I've been thinking a lot about how my love for crafting my hair into these different forms and shapes has honestly never given it a chance to just be,” Skylar explains.
“So for the next few weeks, I will be wearing my natural hair out.” The SheaMoisture Bond Repair Collection is infused with AminoBlend and HydroPlex technology, scientifically proven to make hair 6x stronger with 84% less breakage by repairing and rebuilding broken hair bonds (vs. non-conditioning shampoo). That’s why it's the perfect hair reset for Skylar.
“It's been a long, long time since I've worn my natural curls. I haven’t nurtured it in its natural form so I’m scared of breakage, of it being dry, of it being damaged,” she admits. “I do feel like my hair is in good hands because I will be using the SheaMoisture Bond Repair Collection and it’s known for repairing damaged hair making it smoother, making it stronger like all of these very real concerns I have.”
Thanks to the unique blend of Amino Blend Complex (fortifying amino acids), Amla oil, and fair-trade shea butter used in each product, the hair will become visibly healthier after just one use. That’s because the collection focuses on repairing and reviving dry, damaged hair due to color, protective styles, heat, and more. This 4-step system, which includes Bond Repair Shampoo, Bond Repair Conditioner, Bond Repair Masque, and Bond Repair Leave-in, also enhances weakened hair bonds to reduce future breakage.
Skylar shows us how she uses the collection and it’s giving big, beautiful, healthy hair. “So I think it's gonna be some beauty to allowing my hair to rest,” she says. When it comes to styling, the influencer is “just gonna let Mother Nature do her thing.” Learn more about the SheaMoisture Bond Repair Collection below.
Step One: Bond Repair Shampoo
Rejuvenate your hair with SheaMoisture Bond Repair Shampoo, your go-to solution for luscious locks. Packed with hella hydration power, this shampoo adds moisture by 60% while removing buildup without stripping your strands. This shampoo gently cleanses impurities while significantly enhancing shine, smoothness, and softness.
The Bond Repair Shampoo is the first step in the 4-step Bond Repair system, all of which are infused with the uniquely formulated AminoBlend, and HydroPlex, Shea Moisture’s technology that rebuilds hair strength at its core.
Step Two: Bond Repair Conditioner
Tailored to repair styling damage, this creamy conditioner locks in 12x more moisture than standard non-conditioning shampoos, boosting damaged hair strength by 1.5x with significantly less breakage. The creamy SheaMoisture Bond Repair Conditionerdeeply hydrates, enhances manageability, and leaves your hair looking healthier and shinier.
Step Three: Bond Repair Masque
This Ultra Moisturizing reparative masque is a moisture-rich game-changer for those dealing with the aftermath of hair damage caused by styling. The SheaMoisture Bond Repair Masque delivers 13 times more moisture compared to non-conditioning shampoos, ensuring your hair feels nourished and soft. Designed to repair and rejuvenate, this masque significantly strengthens damaged hair — making it twice as strong while reducing breakage.
Step Four: Bond Repair Leave-In Conditioner
Elevate your curl game with SheaMoisture’s Bond Repair Leave-In Conditioner. Lightweight and hydrating, the Bond Repair Leave-In Conditioner provides 12x more moisture than non-conditioning shampoos and tames frizz with 24-hour humidity control. Designed to define curls and coils, the leave-in conditioner enhances softness and shine allowing you to detangle effortlessly.
Bonding Oil
The SheaMoisture Bonding Oil is a multitasking all-in-one formula that acts as a heat protectant and provides the hair with moisture, strength, shine, damage protection, and intense nourishment. This lightweight oil not only offers 24-hour frizz and humidity control but also fortifies your tresses, making them up to 5 times stronger with significantly less breakage.
Feature image by @skylarmarshai/ Instagram
Here's How To Celebrate Your Birthday...As An Ambivert Or Introvert
Listen, don’t even get me started on all of the sheer creative geniuses that the Gemini season produces (you can check out a mere handful of them via an ESSENCE article from a few years backhere); however, when it comes to my DNA and some members of my tribe, we’re Gemini deep too. My paternal grandparents are both Geminis. My mother, her late brother, and my own brother are Geminis. My mother’s husband is a Gemini. Both of my goddaughters are Geminis. Two of my closest male friends are Geminis. And yes, I am a very proud Gemini as well.
And although I “don’t do holidays,” virtually everyone in my world knows that if there’s a time of the year when I’m gonna be close-to-obnoxious, without any type of reservation or apology, it’s June 17, especially when it’s a milestone year (read between the lines there, chile…LOL). And so, when my peeps asked what I wanted to do this year, especially when one of them suggested a party, all I did was roll my eyes as far back into my head as I could.
As an also proud ambivert (check out “What Exactly Is An Ambivert? How Can You Tell If You Are One?”) and someone who likes to keep my circles…separate (check out “Why I Prefer My Friends To NOT Be Friends With Each Other”), the absolute last thing I want to do is pay to celebrate myself (ain’t it wild how most folks end up bankrolling their own birthday parties only for folks to eat up all of their food and oftentimes not even bring a gift?!) with a room full of folks. Nah, I prefer to go all out, even on “big” years, in a different kind of way.
If you just read all of that and thought to yourself, “FINALLY. Someone who gets where I’m coming from!” — whether you’re a Gemini too (and if so, Happy Birthday! We are so bomb!) or you consider yourself to be an introvert or ambivert and you have a birthday coming up over the next few months, here are seven ways that I have honored my own special day in the past and will be commemorating this year. It has worked hella well for me. Maybe it can be for you, too, sis.
1. One-on-One Dinners with Friends
Hands down, one of my favorite ways to celebrate my birthday is to go out to eat with friends; however, I prefer to take the one-on-one approach. For one thing, y’all know that Geminis have different sides (that really is true), and so, since my circle is rather eclectic, I like to bond with each person individually.
Plus, when you go out with one person at a time, think of how many brunches, lunches, or dinners you can have (based on how large your circle is) that you don’t have to pick the tab up on.
For instance, this year, I am literally going out for three weeks straight, at least five days out of each of those weeks — and each friend has told me that I can go wherever I want to go. And chile, if there’s one thing that Music City’s got, it’s an abundance of restaurants and cuisines! Yep — a very celebratory approach that is also intimate and pretty non-stressful is to set up dinner dates with each friend instead of going out with a room full of folks. I’ve done it for years. I have not one regret.
2. Do an Annual Collection of Something
For about the past decade, at least three people in my world will ask me, about a month out from my birthday, what I will be collecting for the year. For instance, this year, I’m all about a particular stone that symbolizes things like rejuvenated energy, spiritual evolution, and divine wisdom. It never fails that, right around April or so, there will be something that I am drawn to — whether it’s a certain color, a stone or crystal, or a certain type of jewelry…hell, one time it was Pumas (because the actual animal represents things like power and patience).
It’s cool to get a lot of things in a “theme” because it’s empowering and a confirmation to remain in that type of head and heart space until another year rolls around. If you’ve never done something like this before, consider it. It’s fun to see what people come up with once you put them in a general direction of something — something that you know you don’t only want, but you want to be emphasized in your life for the next 12 months.
3. Host a Virtual Party
When it comes to introverts, you’ve probably heard thatthere is so much going on within them that large groups can be quite draining (as opposed to extroverts who enjoy getting energy from outside sources). That’s why large parties, even when they are for them, oftentimes feel more like work than fun. Okay, but what if you’re having a milestone year and you want to find a way to merge a traditional party with your own personality type? Something that you might want to do is hold a virtual birthday party.
You can stagger out your guests by giving them different times to log in to something like a Zoom call; that way, you can control how many people you are dealing with at any given time and sign off when you know that your bandwidth is going low (it's also cost-effective as all get out!). Something else that’s cute about this idea is you can have different themes to each set of “callers.”
For instance, with your low-key friends, you can keep it casual on the appearance tip, and then, with your bougie friends, everyone can dress up. If this piques your interest and you’d like to get some planning tips, clickhere andhere for a few ideas.
4. Create a 'Date Yourself' Calendar
Uh-huh. While social media is out here debating over $200 dates, what I want to know is how many folks who say others are “broke” make it a point to spend that much on themselves. Yeah…EXACTLY. LOL. There are so many benefits that come from “dating yourself.” It reminds you to prioritize yourself. It builds/boosts self-confidence. It helps you to learn more about your interests, passions, likes, and dislikes. It can encourage you to learn how to try new things. It’s a wonderful form of self-love.
And here’s the thing about birthdays — while God willing, you will have many more years to come, what you won’t ever see again is the age you will be on your next birthday…so, the more that you can prioritize to make it your best year yet, the better. In walks creating a calendar where you can plan dates ahead for yourself; ideally, no less than two of them a month. It can be a staycation, a day trip, or even just trying out a new restaurant. Starting off a new age with some pre-planned dates will always give you something to look forward to. Try it. I’d be shocked if you didn’t like it. A LOT.
5. Rock a New Lipstick, Crystal, Scent and Color
If there’s one saying that irks the mess outta me, it’s “People can’t change.” Ain’t it funny how the folks who usually say something like that believe that no one else is capable — oh, but they can? Now, what kind of nonsense is that? The reality is thatthere are plenty of studies to back up the fact that most of us go through personality changes, more than once, over the course of our lives. One article that I read said that we tend to shift the most in the areas of neuroticism, conscientiousness, openness, extroversion, and agreeableness. For example, we might be “less neurotic about conforming to the group, less open to trying new things in order to savor the classics, less conscientious as they become more selfish, and less extroverted as they keep more to themselves” as we age.
A line that I particularly liked in the piece is we must accept that people are clay, not plaster. That said, since each year brings forth a new number, as you’re exploring what else may be different (or shifting), treat yourself to a new color of lipstick, a new crystal or gemstone to wear, a new scent to put on and a new “favorite color.” You’d be amazed by how much simple adjustments like this can have a pretty big impact on how you move in each new year of your life.
6. Get a 'Reward Yourself' Jar
Those of you who are day one Sex and the City fans will probably recall the episode when Carrie went to a child’s birthday party, someone stole her shoes and she registered herself to get the pair back from the couple. If you didn’t see it (you can watch a clip for contexthere), her bottom line point was singles are always supporting couples and parents with their stuff (ain’t that the truth, chile?), so they should be able to get some love, too. She’s right. Somewhat along these same lines, regardless of what your relational status may be at the turn of your next birthday, you should celebrate and reward yourself as often as possible.
If you agree in theory, yet your budget is rolling its eyes at you — get yourself a big ass jar to “reward yourself” with. Every time that you reach a goal, do something that you’re proud of or shoot, restrain yourself in a way that you wouldn’t have in the past, and put some money into it. It can be a quarter or five bucks. Along the same line of a sex jar that I recommend for long-term couples (check out “5 Reasons Why Every Married Couple Needs A Sex Jar”), commit to not taking any money out of the jar until your next birthday rolls around; then splurge however you wish. It’s a totally debt-free way to prioritize celebrating you…year-round.
7. Find a 'Theme Word' for the Year
Final one. You know, it never fails that right around my birthday and then around the time of year that I observe as the new one (Rosh Hashanah), I will pray and ask God to give me a new word to focus on for that season of my life. It also never fails that he will give me one. Like the year that my house literally blew up three days before Christmas (check out “My House Burned Up. Three Days Before Christmas. What It Taught Me.”)? 2022 was ROUGH. However, around my birthday that year, “replenish” was the word that came to me, and it gave me the strength to keep pushing to come up with a new normal for my life.
The word for my birthday this year? I’m going to keep to myself; at least for now. As for you and your own word(s), just remember that the Scripture says that death and life are in the tongue (Proverbs 18:21), and so, it's important to respect the words that you use. As far as theme words go, they can really help you to orchestrate your life with clarity and direction. I can certainly attest to that.
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Aight, like I said, this is my own birthday month, and with my own special day steadily approaching, let me get off of this thing so that I can go on another dinner date.
Ah, the life of an ambivert. Wouldn’t have it any other way. #wink
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