

Today, many women are plunging into a new, self-love-centered approach to their singleness, where they’re enriching their life with new experiences that come with solo dating.
Solo dating allows you to pursue your passions, discover new interests, and treat yourself to experiences that speak to your inner desires and curiosities. Whether hiking through nature, exploring a museum, or savoring a delicious meal you cooked, solo dates are all about celebrating who you are and enjoying the moments you create for yourself — on your own terms.
Embracing your singleness and finding joy in solo dating is a powerful way to reclaim your independence and build a deeper connection with yourself. In a world that often emphasizes relationships, soft launches, and social media-worthy proposals, taking time to appreciate your own company in the “in-between” season can be incredibly fulfilling.
From women new to the solo dating world to seasoned romantics looking for your next spontaneous adventure, we’ve locked down some of the best solo date ideas to inspire you to make the most of your time alone and turn self-care into a fun and enriching journey.
26 Solo Date Ideas
Have a picnic in the park.
Photo by Vladimir Yelizarov on UnsplashHiking: Enjoy nature and the fresh, open trails on a local hike for one.
Picnic in the Park: Pack your favorite snacks, a book, and a journal. Find a scenic spot and relax under the sun.
Be a Beach Bum for the Day: Spend a day at the beach, swimming, sunbathing, or walking along the shore. It's perfect for unwinding and enjoying the ocean breeze.
Farmer’s Market: Spend a Saturday or Sunday at your local farmer’s market to stock up on fresh produce and support small businesses in your area.
Explore the Art Museum: There’s always a new exhibit to explore at an art museum near you. Immerse yourself in a museum's creativity, art, and culture — take your time appreciating each exhibit.
Plan a day trip or a weekend away.
Photo by Jakob Owens on UnsplashTake a Photography Walk: Bring your camera or phone along to capture interesting and scenic sights around your city or neighborhood.
Get Crafty: Try your hand at a DIY or craft project like painting, knitting, or making charm bracelet/necklace jewelry. It's a great way to express creativity.
Take a Pottery Class: Unleash your inner artisan and take a pottery class. The best part? You get to take your new art home with you.
Sit in on a Lecture or Workshop: Attend a lecture or workshop on a topic that interests you. It's a great way to learn something new and meet like-minded people.
Solo Travel: Plan a day trip or weekend getaway to a nearby city or town you've never visited before. Fully embrace the tourist life.
Stretch it out with a yoga class.
Photo by madison lavern on UnsplashLibrary Day: Visit your local library, find a cozy spot, and get lost in a good book you might not have thought to check out.
Stretch it out With a Yoga Class: Join a yoga class for some relaxation and stretching. It's a wonderful way to connect with your body and mind.
Treat Yourself to a Spa Day: Book a massage, facial, or other special treatments. It's the ultimate self-care experience.
Chef it Up: Pick a recipe you've never tried before and spend the evening cooking a delicious meal for yourself.
Coffee Shop Hopping: Coffee lovers tap in! This solo date idea is perfect if you want to sit in a few local coffee shops, try different drinks, and enjoy the ambiance while people-watching.
Indulge in a wine-tasting experience.
Photo by Tim L. Productions on UnsplashWine-Tasting: Indulge in a fancy wine-tasting experience. Put on your finest threads, get glammed up, and enjoy the ease of a few sips of your (new) favorite wine.
Find Your Next Second-Hand Treasure: Find flea markets or estate sales and see what gently-loved item you’ll find.
Go Book Shopping: Are you a bookworm or want to get back into your reading list? Spend a few hours in a bookstore, exploring different genres, and finding a new book to read.
Bilinuage Queen: Take a foreign language class and brush up or learn a new language.
Pasta Making Class: What’s not to love about getting your hands a little dirty while rolling up pasta? Not to mention, you get to eat your creation later.
Movie/Netflix Night: Go to a movie theater or set up a cozy home cinema and watch a film you've been wanting to see.
Explore a new part of your city.
Photo by Good Faces on UnsplashSolo Concert or Live Show: It can be intimidating to attend a concert, play, or live performance by yourself, but worth it. Enjoy the experience of live entertainment you won’t forget.
Courtside Hottie: Go to a home game to support your local basketball or baseball team. Popcorn, hot dogs, and drinks are a must.
Comedy Show: Find a local comedy club and enjoy a night of laughs and fun.
Explore a New Part of Your City: If you live in New York, spend the day in a borough outside of your own. In Chicago, you can take an architecture tour or even take a water taxi to Chinatown. Live in a small town? Take the long way home and adventure out to a part of town known for its food or nightlife.
People-Watching By the Water: Take a day to sit by the water or beachside and journal your thoughts.
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Aley Arion is a writer and digital storyteller from the South, currently living in sunny Los Angeles. Her site, yagirlaley.com, serves as a digital diary to document personal essays, cultural commentary, and her insights into the Black Millennial experience. Follow her at @yagirlaley on all platforms!
Devale Ellis On Being A Provider, Marriage Growth & Redefining Fatherhood
In this candid episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Devale Ellis, actor, social media personality, and star of Zatima, about modern masculinity, learning to be a better husband, emotional presence in marriage, fatherhood for Black men, and leading by example.
“I Wasn’t Present Emotionally”: Devale Ellis on Marriage Growth
Devale Ellis On Learning He Was a ‘Bad Husband’
Ellis grew up believing that a man should prioritize providing for his family. “I know this may come off as misogynistic, but I feel like it’s my responsibility as a man to pay for everything,” he said, emphasizing the wise guidance passed down by his father. However, five years into his marriage to long-time partner Khadeen Ellis, he realized provision wasn’t just financial.
“I was a bad husband because I wasn’t present emotionally… I wasn’t concerned about what she needed outside of the resources.”
Once he shifted his mindset, his marriage improved. “In me trying to be of service to her, I learned that me being of service created a woman who is now willing to be of service to me.”
On Redefining Masculinity and Fatherhood
For Ellis, “being a man is about being consistent.” As a father of four, he sees parenthood as a chance to reshape the future.
“Children give you another chance at life. I have four different opportunities right now to do my life all over again.”
He also works to uplift young Black men, reinforcing their worth in a world that often undermines them. His values extend to his career—Ellis refuses to play roles that involve domestic violence or sexual assault.
Watch the full episode below:
On Marriage, Family Planning, and Writing His Story
After his wife’s postpartum preeclampsia, Ellis chose a vasectomy over her taking hormonal birth control, further proving his commitment to their partnership. He and Khadeen share their journey in We Over Me, and his next book, Raising Kings: How Fatherhood Saved Me From Myself, is on the way.
Through honesty and growth, Devale Ellis challenges traditional ideas of masculinity, making his story one that resonates deeply with millennial women.
For the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker peels back the layers of masculinity with candid conversations that challenge stereotypes and celebrate vulnerability. Real men. Real stories. Real talk.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by YouTube/xoNecole
6 Tabletop Sex Positions That'll Unlock You & Bae's Most Primal Desires
Something I will never tire of is finding new ways to bring new layers to intimacy. A wall you use as momentum, a bathroom sink to help you keep your balance as he worships you on his knees, a shower that is usually for cleansing but evolves into a sacred ritual of shared intimacy.
My favorite kind of sex is the kind of sex that prioritizes pleasure and connection. So, technically and thankfully, I can say most of my sex life has been quite pleasurable throughout the years. But the memorable encounters for sure take the cake. One such encounter actually took place on a kitchen counter, and with it unleashed inhibitions in ways I never anticipated while unlocking levels to top-tier sex. And that, that involved a kitchen counter.
Why Kitchen Counter Sex Just Hits Different
What is it about having your hips pressed into the edge of a kitchen counter that lets out something so primal in you? The cool-to-the-touch feel of the countertop against exposed skin as you rise to meet him again and again. The urgency in every movement. The playfulness of repurposing an everyday space for something far more erotic. If you’re looking to bring that energy into your own sex life, keep reading for positions and tips to explore.
1. The Bounce House
They don’t call it Bounce House for nothing. In this position, the penetrating partner lies flat on their back on a sturdy table or counter while the receiving partner straddles them, knees bent and facing away. With their hands gripping the edge of the surface for support, the receiving partner slides or bounces at their own pace, owning the rhythm, the motion, and the view.
According to sex therapist Michael Aaron, Ph.D., who spoke with Women’s Health, the receiving partner placing their legs between their partner’s creates a tighter sensation, while staying fully astride allows for more bounce and range of motion. Either way, this one puts the receiver in full control, and you know we love a good woman on top position. Pleasure and power? Say less.
2. The Bicycle
Well, you know what they say about riding a bike. In the case of this table top position, it's the receiving partner who is the rider...but not in the way you think. While lying back on a sturdy surface or a table, the receiver will bring their knees toward their chest, bending them as if in a cycling motion. The penetrating partner stands at the edge of the surface, grabbing the receiver's ankles, and guides themselves inside, slowly so as to savor the moment. This angle puts everything on display for the penetrating partner while allowing for deep, connected thrusting for the receiver.
To take things up a notch , the receiving partner can touch themselves or flex their thighs to control the depth or the rhythm. Because, who says only one person gets to have control?
3. Counter Offer
How could we be at the table and not use it to eat? Enter: Counter Offer. In this oral-focused sex position, the receiving partner perches on the edge of a counter or table, lying back or sitting upright with legs parted or bent for comfort. The penetrating partner kneels or stands between their thighs, depending on the setup and the kind of attention they’re ready to give. No doubt, this one’s all about access and intention.
With the vulva front and center, the height makes it easier to maintain eye contact, use hands freely for things like breast play or incorporating toys, and take their time with every moan-inducing taste. And that’s on five, six, seven, ATE.
4. Standing Doggy
Standing Doggy is what happens when a classic like doggy style gets an upgrade. Instead of being on all fours on a bed, the receiving partner bends over a hard surface like a table or counter, keeping their hips aligned at its edge. The penetrating partner stands behind and enters from the back, using the angle to go deeper and create a strong, steady rhythm. This one offers maximum control and visual appeal, especially if the penetrating partner reaches around for a little extra clitoral stimulation throughout thrusting.
This angle can get intense quickly, so bonus points if the receiving partner engages their pelvic floor muscles or shifts their weight to adjust how the pressure hits, especially if your goal is to hit that G-spot sweet spot.
5. Top Shelf
Men's Healthcalls this one "Yourself on the Shelf," but we like to call it "Top Shelf" because it's giving full view, full grip, and climax potential that's hard to top. The receiving partner sits on the edge of a sturdy table or counter while the penetrating partner stands in front of them and slowly slides in, thrusting while keeping them in position. From there, legs can wrap around their waist, arms can encircle their back, and the closeness at peak ecstasy? Chef's kiss.
If you have the core strength, add lifting to the menu for the final strokes leading to orgasm. Otherwise, allow the surface to the heavy lifting and enjoy the pleasure.
6. The Thumper
What better way to remind yourself that you're both the snack and the entrée than with a little tableside service courtesy of The Thumper? This position has the receiving partner kneeling on a sturdy table or counter (keyword: sturdy), hands gripping the edge or braced in front for support. The penetrating partner can then either kneel behind them (if there's room for two), or stay anchored on the ground with both feet planted on the floor (similar to the previously mentioned Standing Doggy). It all depends on the mood.
Kneeling on the table offers just the right amount of leverage for deep, steady strokes. The receiving partner can play with tightness by either keeping their knees closer together for a snug grip, or open their knees wider to invite more access, depth, and stretch. The Thumper is versatile that way, and the most important thing? The receiver gets to be the main course. Yum.
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