Dating is hard. Yes, that's a known fact for many, but one question that my friends and I keep revisiting is where to go to find the men we want. Meeting guys at bars is still a thing, but that's not always promising. Running into the man of your dreams at the grocery store can happen, but you don't really hear about that anymore. If you're in the same boat as I am, then this article may be for you. Recently, I came across a tweet that said run clubs are the new dating apps, and I immediately sent it to my bestie and one of my brothers, who belongs to a run club.
My bestie responded, "Dang, is that what we have to do now? Meet them all sweaty & out of breath lol." While my brother wasn't sure about it being the new dating app, he did say it was a great way to meet new people. As someone who recently tried dating apps again and was ultimately reminded why I got off years ago, I was open to putting this theory to the test. My mom actually suggested I should join a run club months ago, and when I told her about the tweet, she reminded me that mothers are always right.
But before I find a run club to join, I thought I would tap an expert about this recent phenomenon. Imani Tutt is an LMFT therapist and relationship coach and shared whether or not run clubs were the new way to meet singles.
xoNecole: There was a tweet that had a lot of people talking, which said, "Run club is the new dating app." Are people leaving dating apps and meeting singles through clubs and activities instead?
Imani Tutt: I wouldn’t necessarily say people are leaving dating apps altogether, but it’s evident that more individuals are recognizing the value of finding a partner who shares common interests and similar values. This realization underscores the idea that slow and steady often wins the race (no pun intended).
Running clubs, in particular, have seen a surge in popularity since the pandemic, a time when many of us were on lockdown and searching for new ways to stay active and connected. These clubs attract people not only because of their shared interest in fitness and health but also due to the social opportunities they offer. Participants have the chance to meet new people in a natural setting they already enjoy, fostering organic connections that might be harder to achieve through the often impersonal nature of dating apps.
Moreover, activities like running clubs provide a platform for individuals to engage in a healthy, productive hobby while also expanding their social circles. The camaraderie and mutual support inherent in these clubs can lead to deeper, more meaningful connections. This trend isn’t limited to running; other interest-based groups, such as hiking clubs, book clubs, and volunteer organizations, are also becoming popular alternatives for meeting potential partners.
xoN: Is this a new concept, or is it just becoming popular?
IT: I believe this is a relatively new concept that is rapidly gaining popularity. Many people are growing tired of the superficial interactions that often occur on dating apps. On these platforms, users frequently portray idealized versions of themselves, which can lead to disingenuous connections.
In contrast, running clubs offer an environment where individuals can be more authentic and vulnerable. When people participate in physical activities like running, they show their true selves—they're sweaty, tired, and without the masks they might wear online. This authenticity fosters genuine connections and meaningful relationships as participants bond over shared experiences and challenges rather than curated profiles. As a result, running clubs provide a refreshing alternative to traditional dating methods, emphasizing sincerity and authenticity over superficial impressions.
"Running clubs offer an environment where individuals can be more authentic and vulnerable. As a result, running clubs provide a refreshing alternative to traditional dating methods, emphasizing sincerity and authenticity over superficial impressions."
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xoN: Why is this the best way to meet singles?
IT: I wouldn't say this is the absolute best way to meet singles, but it's definitely a great option if you enjoy running. Engaging in an activity you love allows you to meet like-minded people, which can be a fantastic foundation for forming new relationships. When you're part of a running group, you regularly interact with the same individuals, making it easier to build bonds and develop friendships over time; very similar to how it was when we were in school.
I believe this principle applies to any club or group centered around shared interests. Whether it's a book club, a cooking class, or a hiking group, participating in activities that you are passionate about naturally brings you closer to others who share those passions, creating opportunities for meaningful connections.
Additionally, meeting people through a shared hobby can take the pressure off needing to find a partner right away. You're there primarily to enjoy the activity, and any romantic connections that form feel more organic and less forced. Being in a comfortable and familiar environment can also help you present your best self, as you're likely to be more relaxed and confident.
xoN: Besides running clubs, what are some other clubs that people can join to meet singles, especially for people who aren't interested in athletic clubs?
IT: When looking to meet singles outside of athletic clubs, it’s important to consider your interests and hobbies. Do not join a club solely to meet a partner; that is a one-way ticket to a disaster waiting to happen.
When you take the time to understand your own interests and hobbies, you give yourself the opportunity to not only meet like-minded individuals but also enjoy the activities you participate in. Here are several types of clubs and groups where you can meet singles:
Art Clubs: If you have a passion for painting, drawing, or any form of visual arts, joining an art club can be a great way to connect with others who share your interest. These clubs often organize workshops, gallery visits, and art exhibitions, providing ample opportunities to socialize.
Music Clubs: Whether you enjoy playing an instrument, singing, or simply appreciating music, music clubs offer a variety of activities such as jam sessions, concerts, and music appreciation nights. These events can be a fun way to meet people who share your musical tastes.
Book Clubs: For those who love reading, book clubs offer a perfect setting to discuss literature with others. Book clubs typically meet regularly to discuss a chosen book, fostering deep conversations and connections over shared literary interests.
Poetry and Writing Groups: If writing is your passion, joining a poetry or writing group can be incredibly fulfilling. These groups often host readings, workshops, and critique sessions, allowing you to improve your craft while meeting others who enjoy writing.
Church: For those who are faith-based, church groups can provide a supportive community. These groups often organize social events, volunteer opportunities, and study sessions, which can be great for meeting new people with similar values.
Volunteer Organizations: Joining a volunteer group can be a rewarding way to meet people while giving back to the community. Whether it’s through environmental causes, animal shelters, or community service projects, volunteering can connect you with others who are passionate about making a difference.
Luis Alvarez/ Getty Images
Hobby and Craft Clubs: From knitting circles to model building, hobby and craft clubs bring together people with specific interests. These clubs offer a relaxed environment to work on projects and chat with others who enjoy the same hobbies.
Cooking Classes and Clubs: If you love cooking or want to improve your culinary skills, cooking classes or clubs can be a fun way to meet others. These groups often involve hands-on cooking sessions followed by social dining experiences.
Language Exchange Groups: For those interested in learning a new language, language exchange groups offer a unique opportunity to practice speaking with native speakers and other learners. These groups often meet in casual settings, providing a friendly environment for conversation and cultural exchange.
Gaming Groups: Whether you’re into board games, video games, or tabletop RPGs, gaming groups can be a fantastic way to meet fellow enthusiasts. Many cities have game stores or cafes that host regular game nights, creating a fun and interactive way to meet new people.
Hiking Groups: If you enjoy the great outdoors, joining a hiking group can be an excellent way to meet new people while staying active. Hiking groups often organize regular hikes ranging from easy to challenging trails, allowing you to explore nature and bond with others who appreciate outdoor adventures.
xoN: Where can someone find these clubs?
IT: You can find these clubs through a variety of platforms and methods:
TikTok: Many clubs and interest groups promote their activities and events on TikTok. By following relevant hashtags and accounts, one can discover new clubs and communities.
Facebook Groups: Facebook is a rich resource for finding clubs. There are numerous groups dedicated to various interests, hobbies, and activities. Searching for specific keywords related to your interests can lead you to active communities.
Word of Mouth: Personal recommendations from friends, family, and colleagues are often invaluable. By talking to people in your social circle, you can discover clubs that align with your interests and gain insights into their experiences.
Eventbrite: This platform lists a wide range of events, including club meetings, workshops, and social gatherings. By searching for events in your area, you can find clubs hosting activities that interest you.
Instagram: Many clubs use Instagram to promote their activities, share updates, and engage with their members. Following club accounts and relevant hashtags can help you stay informed about upcoming events and initiatives.
Meetup: Meetup is a popular platform designed specifically to connect people with similar interests. You can search for clubs and events based on your interests and location.
Local Community Centers and Libraries: Many local community centers and libraries host clubs and interest groups. Checking their bulletin boards and websites can provide information on upcoming meetings and events.
University and College Campuses: If you're a student or have access to a campus, universities and colleges often have a wide range of clubs. Their student services offices or club fairs are excellent places to find out more.
Online Forums and Websites: Websites like Reddit, Quora, and specialized forums can be great resources for finding clubs. By participating in discussions and asking for recommendations, you can connect with like-minded individuals.
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London Alexaundria is the contributing editor for xoNecole. She is an alum of Clark Atlanta University, where she majored in Mass Media Arts and has worked in journalism for over ten years. You can follow her on Instagram and TikTok @theselfcarewriter
This Black Woman-Owned Creative Agency Shows Us The Art Of Rebranding
Rebranding is an intricate process and very important to the success of businesses that want to change. However, before a business owner makes this decision, they should determine whether it's a rebrand or an evolution.
That's where people like Lola Adewuya come in. Lola is the founder and CEO of The Brand Doula, a brand development studio with a multidisciplinary approach to branding, social media, marketing, and design.
While an evolution is a natural progression that happens as businesses grow, a rebrand is a total change. Lola tells xoNecole, "A total rebrand is necessary when a business’s current reputation/what it’s known for is at odds with the business’s vision or direction.
"For example, if you’ve fundamentally changed what your product is and does, it’s likely that your brand is out of alignment with the business. Or, if you find your company is developing a reputation that doesn’t serve it, it might be time to pump the brakes and figure out what needs to change.
She continues, "Sometimes you’ll see companies (especially startups) announce a name change that comes with updated messaging, visuals, etc. That usually means their vision has changed or expanded, and their previous branding was too narrow/couldn’t encompass everything they planned to do."
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The Brand Doula was born in 2019, and its focus is on putting "the experiences, goals, and needs of women of color founders first," as well as brands with "culture-shifting missions."
According to Lola, culture-shifting is "the act of influencing dominant behavior, beliefs, or experiences in a community or group (ideally, for the better)."
"At The Brand Doula, we work with companies and leaders that set out to challenge the status quo in their industries and communities. They’re here to make an impact that sends ripples across the market," she says.
"We help the problem solvers of the world — the ones who aren't satisfied with 'this is how it's always been' and instead ask 'how could this be better?' Our clients build for impact, reimagining tools, systems, and ways of living to move cultures forward."
The Brand Doula has worked with many brands, including Too Collective, to assist with their collaboration with Selena Gomez's Rare Beauty and Balanced Black Girl for a "refresh," aka rebrand. For businesses looking to rebrand, Lola shares four essential steps.
1. Do an audit of your current brand experience — what’s still relevant and what needs to change? Reflect on why you’re doing the rebrand in the first place and what success would look like after relaunching.
2. Tackle the overall strategy first — before you start redesigning logos and websites, align on a new vision for your brand. How do you want your company to be positioned moving forward? Has your audience changed at all? Will your company have a fresh personality and voice?
3. Bring your audience along the journey — there’s no need to move in secret. Inviting your current audience into the journey can actually help them feel more connected to and invested in your story, enough to stick around as changes are being made.
4. Keep business moving — one of my biggest pet peeves is when companies take down their websites as soon as they have the idea to rebrand, then have a Coming Soon page up for months! You lose a lot of momentum and interest by doing that. If you’re still in business and generating income, continue to operate while you work on your rebrand behind the scenes. You don’t want to cut existing customers off out of the blue, and you also don’t want so much downtime that folks forget your business exists or start looking for other solutions.
While determining whether the rebrand was successful may take a few months, Lola says a clear sign that it is unsuccessful is negative feedback from your target audience. "Customers are typically more vocal about what they don’t like more than what they do like," she says.
But some good signs to look out for are improvements in engagement with your marketing, positive reviews, press and increase in retention, and overall feeling aligned with the new branding.
For more information about Lola and The Brand Doula, visit her website, thebranddoula.com.
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Exclusive: Dreka Gates Talks Farm Life, Self-Mastery, And Her Wellness Brand
Dreka Gates is making a name in wellness through authenticity and innovativeness. Although we were introduced to her as a music manager for her husband, Kevin Gates, she has now carved out her own lane outside of music as a wellness entrepreneur. But according to Dreka, this is nothing new.
In a xoNecole exclusive, the mom of two opened up about many things, including starting her wellness journey at 13 years old. However, a near-death experience during a procedure at 20 made her start taking her health more seriously.
“There's so many different levels, and now, I'm in a space of just integrating all of this good stuff that I've learned just about just being human, you know?” Dreka tells us. “So it's also fun because it's like a journey of self-discovery and self-mastery. That's what I call it. So it's never-ending.”
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If you follow Dreka, then you’re familiar with her holistic lifestyle, as she’s no stranger to promoting wellness, self-care, and holistic living. She even lives part-time on a Mississippi farm, not far from her grandmother and great-grandmother’s farm, where she spent some summers as a child.
While her grandmother and great-grandmother have passed on, Dreka reflects on that time in her life and how having a farm as an adult is her getting back to her roots. “So the farm was purchased back in 2017, and it was like, ah, that'll just be a place where we go when we're not touring or whatever,” she said.
“But covid hit, and I was there, and I was on the land, and I just started remembering back to going to my grandmother's during the summertime and freaking picking peas and going and eating mulberries off the freaking tree in the bushes.
“And she literally had cotton plants. I know some people feel weird about picking cotton and stuff. She had cotton plants and I would go and pick cotton out of her garden. And she had chickens, and I literally just broke down in tears one day when I was on the farm just doing all the things, and I'm like, ‘Oh my gosh. I'm literally getting back to my roots.”
I literally just broke down in tears one day when I was on the farm just doing all the things, and I'm like, ‘Oh my gosh. I'm literally getting back to my roots.
You can catch glimpses of Dreka’s farm life on Instagram, which shows her picking fruit and vegetables and loving on her animals like her camel Eessa. Her passion for growing and cultivating led her to try and grow all of her ingredients for her wellness brand, Dreka Wellness. However, she quickly realized that she might be biting off more than she could chew. But that didn’t stop her from fulfilling her vision.
Watch below as Dreka talks more about her business, her wellness tips, breaking toxic cycles, becoming a doula, and more.
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