Here Are 4 Bad Dating Habits You Absolutely Need To Break This Year
It is a brand new year and you know how the saying goes, "a new year, a new me" so I challenge you to bring that same energy into your dating life. Although you may not be perfect in the area of dating or have made the wisest decisions, I do believe that this year is the year to make an honest effort to date better. I do believe that the following habits listed below often blur our judgement of people. Therefore, if you make a conscious effort to no longer allow those things to be a part of how you date, it may lead to a fruitful experience in that area.
Dating does not have to give you a headache. Here are the dating habits we should not give power to by continuing to do. Check them out below.
1.Allowing fear of judgement to stop you from articulating what it is you are looking for...
ShutterstockBefore you go into dating, you must be clear and proud of what it is you are looking for. Too often, women shy away from articulating that they are looking for a relationship because they believe it makes them look "thirsty" or desperate. The truth of the matter is that it makes you look like neither! Being unapologetic about what you want indicates maturity, self-awareness, and confidence. All of which is a part of the recipe to create a situationship-free year for 2021.
2.Limiting dates to just dinner...
Food is great and it can quickly become bae but be careful to not make those dinner dates as your only form of interaction with a potential partner. Dinner dates are fun because you get to dress up and see a potential partner in their finest attire while enjoying fine dining. However, dinner dates will not allow you to see how that individual interacts with people (other than the waiter and staff), how they handle losing a game, sense their creative side, and learn more about who they are. Dinner is great, but it is not enough.
I suggest trying the following date ideas (with social distancing) as a way to gain a better of that person:
- Bowling
- Painting class
- Visit a zoo, museum or aquarium
- Pottery class
- Cooking class
- Rock climbing
- Axe throwing
- Miniature golf
Or, if you're not ready to meet in person, you can try these virtual approaches to dating:
- Virtual cooking class
- Virtual online game night
- Watch a documentary or movie (keep it at a reasonable length) and have a discussion
- Virtual workout session
3.Texting as the only form of communication...
Being in quarantine for almost a year has had a toll on many of us. Not being able to have meaningful human interaction with our loved ones is taxing so the last thing you need this year is a pen pal during a pandemic. I do understand that talking on the phone is not for everyone and if that is you, I suggest you try FaceTime or the good old-fashioned Zoom call. Texting can become quickly complicated because you cannot always sense the person's true tone in their messaging and many people do not always feel like typing up a paragraph to answer that "tell me about yourself" question.
Therefore, a phone conversation, FaceTime or Zoom call, can allow people to effectively convey their thoughts and it will provide the listener with a better sense of who that person is.
4.Situationships being the norm...
Shutterstock
There is way too much life to live to waste your time trying to convince an individual to commit to you in a relationship IF you have been acting like you are already in one. For many, 2020 taught people the value of time and how important it is for it not to be wasted. Situationships will waste your time if that is not what you ideally want. You can have an amazing luxurious dating experience with that person but after a period of time, you can't help but ask yourself, is this what I am worthy of? If you desire a title and commitment, do not settle or compromise yourself in that area.
Despite how frustrating dating can be, it is critical that you keep in mind that asking for something beyond a situationship is not doing the most! If someone says different, then inform them that it is considered the most with the wrong individual. If you do not want confusion in the area of dating to be your portion in 2021, I suggest you try the following tips listed above.
Cheers to productive and fruitful dating experience in 2021.
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Featured image by Shutterstock
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Joy is a 2x Author, Empowerment Speaker, and Strategy Coach. Her platform, Speak With Joy, mission is, "To empower and equip Women and Young Adults to speak with JOY despite life's circumstances in the area of FAITH, PURPOSE, and RELATIONSHIPS".
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Rihanna Talks Shedding Expectations And Finding Balance As A Mother
Since becoming a mother in 2022, Rihanna has defined parenthood by her terms and hopes to pass that sense of autonomy on to her children.
For Vogue China’s April cover story, Rihanna shared her perspective on raising her two sons with A$AP Rocky, and how she hopes to preserve her children’s uniqueness, devoid of societal expectations.
"The most beautiful thing...is that [children] come into the world with their own individuality and sincerity, without any logic or conformity,” she told the publication. “Which usually makes you feel that you must fit into a certain group."
The “Work” artist, known for her trendsetting style and captivating persona, expressed her desire to support children in fully embracing their individuality and encouraging them to be whoever they want to be. "It's really beautiful to see and I want to continue to help them navigate that and make sure that they know they can be whoever they want to be,” she says.
She continues, “They should embrace it completely, because it's beautiful, and it's unique. I love them just that way."
From shattering music charts to shaking up the beauty industry, Rihanna has forged a path that has since created the “dream” life we see today. One that she says has made her parents proud of.
“I’m living my dream,” she continued. “My parents were very proud of that because they just wanted me to be happy and successful. So, I think the key thing is to find some kind of balance. Yes, balance is important. Do this and you get the best of both worlds. You can write your own life the way you want, and it will be beautiful. Sometimes, you just need to let go of everyone’s expectations and start living your own story.”
Rihanna, who shares sons, RZA, 23 months, and Riot, 8 months, with rapper A$AP Rocky, recently shared her vision for expanding her family in the future in Interview Magazine.
When stylist Mel Ottenberg asked about the number of additional children she hoped to have, Rihanna replied, "As many as God wants me to have.”
"I don't know what God wants, but I would go for more than two. I would try for my girl,” she adds. “But of course, if it's another boy, it's another boy."
Featured image by Neil MockfordWireImage