October is a month of balance. With some energy moving direct and some energy moving retrograde, there is a middle ground to find this month between what is unfolding and what you are letting go. The month begins with Mercury officially moving out of retrograde and going direct in Virgo. Mercury this month is cleaning house and sprucing things up after the somewhat tyrant energy it’s brought over the past few weeks. Now that Mercury is direct, there is less interruption when it comes to daily flow and plans, and this is a good month to start setting things into motion.
On October 9th, there is a Full Moon in Aries, which is the Hunter’s Moon of the year. This Full Moon is cleaning what is in the way towards your direction and positive movement forward and is a time of building momentum. The Moon in Aries is feisty, and this is a passionate Full Moon. Both Pluto and Saturn go direct this month after being retrograde for the past few months. Pluto will be direct in Capricorn on October 8th and Saturn goes direct in Aquarius on October 23rd, what this means for the collective is fewer power struggles and more opportunities to come together.
Toward the end of the month, there is a New Moon Solar Eclipse happening in Scorpio on October 25th, and it’s as magical as it sounds. This Solar Eclipse is a time of emotional rejuvenation and transformation, and new doors are opening. Jupiter retrograde in Aries moves into Pisces on October 28th and is taking some heat off fire and air signs, and impacting water and earth signs more now. Jupiter retrograde in Pisces asks you to check in with your modes of healing, spirituality, and emotional regulation and to make sure your beliefs are stronger than your doubts.
As the month comes to an end, the infamous Mars in Gemini transit makes some moves and goes retrograde from October 30th until January 12, 2023. Mars retrograde in Gemini is wildcard energy and it’s best to remain flexible with what’s occurring at this time. Things are up in the air and Mars is giving you the clarity on what to grab ahold of or where to redirect your energy. October is a time of new beginnings and a change of pace.
Aries Horoscope for October 2022
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleYou are reaching a pinnacle of achievement this month, Aries. October is a month of evolution as you move into the next chapter in your life. You have been through a time of growth and have turned your challenges into stepping stones to your success. With Jupiter retrograde moving out of your sign this month, you are getting a weight lifted off your shoulders and a helping hand when you least expect it.
The Full Moon happening this month will be in your sign on October 9th. This Full Moon is a time of re-energizing your spirit, and renewal. Take some time for yourself this day, relax, and gather your strength. You deserve a moment to just be and breathe before you walk into the new doors that are opening for you now. This month is all about living in your empowerment and aligning with your synergy, Aries.
Taurus Horoscope for October 2022
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is all about getting out of your head and into the moment, Taurus. Your guidance for the month is to focus on the bigger picture, connect with the heart spaces, and take note of the gifts in your world. You are solving some puzzles in your life this month and coming to your own conclusions rather than letting anyone else form them for you. This is a month of learning more about where you stand and where you want to continue to plant your roots.
There is a New Moon Solar Eclipse happening in your opposite sign Scorpio before the month ends and this is an awakening time for you in love. You are gaining clarity on how your heart is expanding right now, by the reflection you are seeing in others. There is playfulness, love, and connection that wants to come into your life more this month but it’s all about perspective and seeing the opportunities in your life.
Gemini Horoscope for October 2022
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is all about reclaiming your power, Gemini. This month you are being reminded of the power you hold as a creator in your life, and that the value you hold for yourself, sends out energy externally. Use your time and energy wisely, and remember that you always deserve a seat at the table. With your ruling planet Mercury moving direct at the start of the month, you are moving through October with new experiences and wisdom unfolding for you.
Saturn officially moves direct on the 23rd the same day Scorpio Season begins, and travel plans, opportunities for adventure, and aligning with the higher self are all coming through for you. Mars in Gemini makes its significant transit at the end of the month and goes retrograde in your sign on October 30th until January 12, 2023, and you are entering a major growth spurt of learning more about yourself, your goals, and the direction you are headed right now.
Cancer Horoscope for October 2022
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleThings are moving full speed ahead for you this month, Cancer. October is a month of opportunities for you, and you have the Midas Touch right now. This is the month to fuel your spirit, and to follow through on some dreams you have been looking to come to fruition. With Mercury officially moving out of retrograde at the beginning of the month, you are able to get the message across right now and are putting your best foot forward this month.
There is a Solar Eclipse happening in your fellow water sign, Scorpio, on the 25th, and this Solar Eclipse is opening up a new chapter in your life when it comes to your happiness. This Eclipse is here to highlight where your heart is, what is making you happy, and where you truly feel free in your life. With Jupiter retrograde moving into Pisces a few days later and into your 9th house of adventure, you are being guided to be flexible this month and remain open to the possibilities you encounter.
Leo Horoscope for October 2022
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is a month of rejuvenation for you, Leo. After somewhat of a chaotic past few months, the fog is clearing and you are seeing things in a new light. This month is a time of being recognized for the beauty and creativity you inspire in this world and it’s about allowing yourself to receive love right now. You have given so much to others recently and this is beautiful, but this month you are being reminded to allow others to share that love with you as well.
The New Moon Solar Eclipse this month is happening in your 4th house of home, family, and foundations, and you are seeing breakthroughs here. Over the next six months, you are going to be entering a new stage of your life when it comes to those closest to your heart, and the places that make you feel at home. By the end of the month, Jupiter retrograde enters Pisces, and you are leaving the month thinking about the commitments that are being formed in your life at this time.
Virgo Horoscope for October 2022
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleVirgo, this month is all about flying high and being the leader of your life. You are rising above any previous chaos or challenges that Mercury retrograde has brought into your life, and experiencing a new sense of freedom this month. With Mercury going direct on October 2nd and being direct in your sign until October 10th, you are entering the month seeing things come full circle and a positive change of pace in your life. There are less roadblocks on your journey moving forward, and things are flowing your way.
With the energy moving into Scorpio towards the second half of the month and the attention moving towards your house of communication, self-expression is key in October. This month you are getting the messages and answers you have been looking for, and it’s making it easier to communicate and express yourself. New connections are coming into your life this month, and these are situations you have been hoping for. Remember that you deserve to take up space this month, Virgo.
Libra Horoscope for October 2022
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleYour season is here, beautiful Libra, and this is your time! Libra Season is in full swing as you enter October, and with Mercury going direct at the beginning of the month after being retrograde in your sign and in Virgo, you out of most really benefit from this change of pace. The mind is clearing, opportunities are popping up, and plans are falling into place. There have been some adjustments and reworking in your life, but this month you are seeing how your plans and intentions have worked out for the best for everyone involved.
The Full Moon this month is happening in your opposite sign, Aries, on October 9th, and will be highlighting your 7th house of love. You are closing one chapter in this area of your life during the Full Moon, and preparing for the new. As you have been regrouping and gathering your strength, in mid-October you are ready to let go of anything holding you back from truly experiencing partnership, unconditional love, and everything you need in a relationship, and you are making space for new experiences in love.
Scorpio Horoscope for October 2022
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is all about balance for you, Scorpio. You have been learning a lot about perspective this year and how one thought can change things for you both positively and negatively, and this month you are experiencing the final lessons of this chapter. This is a month of being a master of your reality and creating the circumstances you want for yourself. There is a divine coming together happening in October, and there is a lot of beauty and magic to enjoy in your life this month as the energy moves into your sign.
Venus enters your sign and Scorpio Season also begins on the same day, on October 23rd. With the Sun and Venus coming together and shining just for you, you have a lot of love coming your way this month and you have taken the time over the past few months to clear your energy, making space to receive this love and empowerment in your life. Before the month ends there is a New Moon Solar Eclipse in your sign on October 28th, and you are experiencing major breakthroughs and epiphanies in your life.
Sagittarius Horoscope for October 2022
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is bringing a windfall of blessings into your life, Sagittarius. October is a special month for you as the intentions you have been setting come to fruition in your life and you gain a new sense of stability. One door opening is leading to many other positive experiences for you, and the more you keep up this energy in your life and believe you are worthy of this good, the more it can enter.
With Saturn officially going direct this month after being retrograde in the area of your life having to do with home and family over the past few months, you are finally getting the opportunities to ground your energy and spend peaceful time in your safe spaces. Find your center, and remember to reach out to others when you need to. At the end of the month, we have a New Moon Solar Eclipse on the 25th, and this time for you is all about healing, finding the middle ground, and releasing what doesn’t serve you in this next phase of life.
Capricorn Horoscope for October 2022
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is a new beginning for you, Capricorn. You are at the beginning stages of some important chapters of your life, and this month is an opening to those experiences. Over the past few months with your ruling planet Saturn in retrograde, you have been cracked open and awakening to something beautiful. The vulnerability and grace you have shown yourself even through times when it was hard to see the light, is commendable.
Pluto has been retrograde in your sign since April 29th and finally goes direct this month on October 8th. You are going through the stages of rebirth as you get out of your shell more this month, and let the world see the growth you have been through. Instead of looking for the light at the end of the tunnel, you realized you were the light yourself, and October is about shining that light, Capricorn.
Aquarius Horoscope for October 2022
AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month you are being guided to breathe, and take it one day at a time, Aquarius. This is a month of divine intervention, and situations are moving around to create a better circumstance for yourself. With Saturn moving Retrograde in your sign over the past few months, you’ve gotten a look at things from a higher perspective. Some adjustments and rebuilding were necessary, but you were able to live your life on your own terms rather than according to anyone else’s plan.
October is a month all about being the creator of your life and rewriting your story. With Saturn officially moving out of retrograde and going direct in Aquarius on October 23rd, you get to enjoy the benefits of task-master Saturn for the rest of the year, and there is a sense of achievement and empowerment with you moving forward. Use this month to finalize plans, tie up any loose ends, and get things sorted out.
Pisces Horoscope for October 2022
PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is a time of paving new paths for yourself in life, Pisces. With all of the activity going on in the sky this month, you are finding your way. Mercury retrograde officially goes direct at the beginning of the month, and you get a breath of fresh air in regards to love. Relationship matters start to move more smoothly over the month after a time of Mercury retrograde helping you gain the full picture here.
With a New Moon Solar Eclipse in fellow water sign Scorpio happening this month, you are seeing some massive changes in your life as you move more into the month. The Solar Eclipse happening in October will be moving through your 9th house of adventure and some big plans and intentions you have set for the year are being seen through at this time. Your guidance for the month is to stay focused on what you are creating, and believe in yourself.
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Featured image by Kyra Jay for xoNecole
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When we talk via Zoom in late August, Lindsay, 38, has just returned from a lunch date with a friend, the type of midday social outing she’d never had time for previously. In a week, she’ll be heading to Europe for an Eat, Pray, Love trip. It’s the first time she’s had time to go to Europe in five years.
“You ask me what I have time to do? Take care of me,” she says, beaming.
In the past six years, Lindsay has made a lot of changes. After becoming the first Black woman to lead ABC’s Bachelorette dating series in 2017, she fell in love with Bryan Abasolo, the man she chose on the show, and married him. Enamored with the world of entertainment but also accustomed to the stability that being an attorney provided her, she returned to practicing law in her native Dallas, Texas, while pursuing media opportunities on the side.
For a time, Lindsay would fly herself to Connecticut to co-host ESPN’s Football Frenzy radio show. The role was perfect for the Dallas Cowboys fan and sports fanatic who majored in sports management and once dreamed of becoming an agent. In 2019, when she finally felt she’d saved enough money and made enough connections, she made the leap and left the legal profession behind, determined to bet on her entertainment dreams.
Working as an on-air correspondent for Extra was one of Lindsay’s first big roles as a full-time media personality. In this job, she interviewed celebrities such as Halle Bailey and Anthony Anderson. She also notably conducted the controversial interview with Bachelor host Chris Harrison that subsequently led to his departure from the franchise. After Harrison told Lindsay he felt people needed to have “grace” for a contestant who had attended an “Old South” party, Lindsay publicly announced her plans to distance herself from the series.
Today, she cites changes in Extra’s leadership and her responsibilities as the reason for her recent departure after three years. “I just didn’t fit within the new regime,” she reveals to xoNecole.
Lindsay is currently focusing her energy work-wise on her two podcasts with The Ringer Podcast Network, the Higher Learningshow with Van Lathan, and Morally Corrupt. Despite the extremely different subjects – Higher Learning touches on race and politics while Morally Corrupt finds Lindsay commenting on her favorite Bravo reality shows – she gushes when speaking about both, calling podcasting “the most liberating thing you can do.”
On Higher Learning, she’s challenged by her co-host, Lathan, to think in new ways. She’s regularly in conversation with prominent figures such as Tracee Ellis Ross and Billy Porter.
Lindsay, a “Bravoholic” whose favorite Real Housewives franchise is Potomac and whose favorite Housewife is Nene Leakes, is no less passionate about Morally Corrupt, even if the subject matter is much lighter. “I’ve always loved reality TV because it was such an escape from my real world. Part of me admired people who could put themselves out there in a way that I believed I never could, until I went on reality TV,” Lindsay says.
Courtesy of Rachel Lindsay
The podcast host says she never intended to find love when she went on The Bachelor, and she was surprised when she was asked to lead season 13 of The Bachelorette. Going from viewer to reality TV star quickly opened her eyes to the demands of being a public figure. After receiving initial criticism from viewers about choosing and marrying Bryan Abasolo, she realized she wanted to become more protective of certain aspects of her personal life.
“I quickly learned that we had to protect what we had, and stop trying to prove it to other people and convince people to know what we knew to be true,” she says. “I wish I could share more of my relationship. But the moment you do that, you have to continue to provide more and you have to continue to answer.”
In many ways, Lindsay benefited from being on a show like The Bachelorette, where the contestants are confined to a limited environment over a temporary amount of time. She says she doesn’t think she could ever be on a reality show where she’s expected to reveal all aspects of her life constantly. In fact, she says if she ever had pregnancy news or updates about her relationship with Abasolo, she wouldn’t make a big public announcement.
Since walking away from The Bachelor franchise, the former Bachelor Happy Hour host says she’s been approached to participate in recent seasons, specifically this year’s season with Black lead, Charity Lawson. Lindsay says she ultimately declined to participate. “I just started thinking I can have a relationship with Charity – whose number I do have and I have talked to – outside of the show. I don’t need to come on television to put that out there for other people,” she says.
Reflecting on her life today, Lindsay is trying to learn the benefits of being still. She’s not planning to do any on-air correspondent work for the time being, and she’s not planning to release another book, the followup to the collection of essays Miss Me with That or the fictional Real Love.
As her 40th birthday approaches in a couple of years, she’s been thinking a lot about the popular quote, “You are, right now, as young as you'll ever be again” from the FX drama Fleishman Is in Trouble. If she does start on a new creative project, it might delve into this notion, she says. “I think I could do something in that space about adulthood and getting older and maybe questioning things in life because I think we all do it,” she tells xoNecole.
Lindsay is not rushing the process, though. For now, she’s remembering to rest and renew.
“We'll see what comes out of this state that I'm in.”
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Featured image courtesy of Rachel Lindsay
Some women have their whole wedding planned out, from the bridal gown and venue to the bridal party and playlist. However, KJ was not one of those people. “I didn’t foresee a wedding in my future,” she reveals. “I was just gonna be the boss chick, rich auntie. I didn’t force love in my life until recently. I never had an idea of what a dream wedding would look like, it was easier for me to elope.”
KJ Smith
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
And to many people’s surprise, that was their original plan – until Skyh brought up a valid concern. He was raised by his grandmother and thought she should be at the wedding, and naturally, that led to KJ wanting her grandmother to be there as well – then her mom – and later her sister – and, you’ve gotta invite the besties too, right? From there, the guest list continued to blossom. Much like the updo and pop of color bold red lip, she wore on her special day, which was initially on her Pinterest board as a soft glam look with her hair hanging on her shoulders, KJ is okay with changing her plan if it brings her and her loved ones happiness.
So let’s get into the wedding, which took place in Malibu, CA. The first thing you should know about the celebrity couple is that they’re non-traditional. They know, and they don’t care. So, in true unconventional fashion, they shared the morning of the wedding together.
“I woke up with Skyh, we walked our dog, had black coffee, and said good morning to the people who stayed at the venue with us,” she says.
Now, it was time for hair and makeup. While she was getting glammed up, she had Black-owned McBride Sisters wine and champagne (which ties into The Black Experience theme) on deck with her mom and friends, had her besties help rework her vows, retried on every outfit (sis is very Type-A), took photos, and ended the early-celebration with prayer and meditation. It seems very non-Bridezilla, I said.
“Yeah, I was the most unbothered bride ever. Everyone was just so supportive. As entertainers, we go on red carpets all the time. We actually have a production company,” she explains. “The get-ready process was like a day at work, but with people we love the most. Being entertainers, we didn’t feel stressed at all, but my excitement was so high.”
Things moved quickly, and before she knew it, it was time to line up to walk down the aisle.
“Yeah, I was the most unbothered bride ever. Everyone was just so supportive. As entertainers, we go on red carpets all the time. We actually have a production company. The get-ready process was like a day at work, but with people we love the most. Being entertainers, we didn’t feel stressed at all, but my excitement was so high.”
KJ Smith and her bridal party
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
Since everything started with their grandmothers, the couple wanted to ensure they honored them and planned to keep an element of their wedding traditional. Although we’ve all seen the reception videos and photos online, you may have noticed visuals from the wedding itself are harder to find.
“We planned for it to be traditional, but we’re not like that, so we tried to create those moments. We jumped the broom and had a salt ceremony (where the bride and groom individually pour salt into a glass container, symbolizing their lives becoming one.) But honestly, still, nothing was traditional about it.”
She goes on to explain that her mom caught the holy ghost coming down the aisle, her glam team was on deck, and she became so nervous with excitement that she had an anxiety attack – something she struggled with for years, she explains tearfully. Her friends had to literally cheer her down the aisle because of how overwhelmed she felt until she eventually calmed down.
“Skyh was standing there with his hand on his heart; we have our own little language, and I could feel the support,” she shares.
It was surprising to hear all these emotional moments happened before the party we saw online. That is until she once again got into the backstory.
“As a Black woman actress, for so long, it was popular to be mysterious and secretive, but that’s not who I am or what I like. Plus, we both wanted to create an experience for everyone there. We are the people who always host family and friends,” she says. “Like for me, the first order of business was getting sandals for the women so they can dance all night long. We had oxtail, D'ussé, and a coffee and sativa lounge – which is part of Skyh and I’s lifestyle and routine. We wanted to bring them into our world.”
Skyh Black (L) and KJ Smith (R)
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
She went on to discuss the dance routine she did for her husband at the reception, which has taken over the internet. Apparently, that’s another thing that didn’t go according to plan. According to KJ, she had promised a performance at their joint bachelor/ bachelorette party, but her outfit got stolen from her car. So, Skyh ended up performing for her – complete with a strip tease. Still, she never forgot her promise to dance for him.
So, she hired her friend as a choreographer, learned the routine, made friends and family watch it endless times, and attended Beyoncé’s Renaissance show a few days before for a confidence boost. It ended up being a show to remember. But that wasn’t all the night offered. Lil Mo performed, and the guests received special goody bags featuring their favorite Black-owned products like journals, hair care, and more.
“We made sure everyone was taken care of all night. That kind of stuff makes us happy. I wanted everyone there to experience the joy and love I have for myself, my partner, and for them. I wanted them to feel full and whole, and they had the time of their lives,” she says.
But naturally, the internet is going to internet, and while there were countless people praising the event and applauding the newlyweds, some thought it was too over the top. I was curious to know her thoughts on some of the criticism.
“It’s cool. We did what we wanted to do. I’ve decided to share my world with people. Just how I went on social media platforms and found inspiration, I want people to do the same,” she explains. “I don’t think it's fair to my supporters not to give that out. There’s so much I wanna share with brides, specifically Black brides. I love that people are adding it to their Pinterest boards."
"I wanted everyone there to experience the joy and love I have for myself, my partner, and for them. I wanted them to feel full and whole, and they had the time of their lives."
KJ Smith
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
“I’m happy with it because we did what we wanted to do. They can do what they wanna do. Don’t be cruel, though, because you will get blocked,” she said, laughing.
The more I spoke with her, the more her sense of freedom shined through. People are always going to have their opinions, but at the end of the day, it’s you who has to live your life, and it seems like the couple realizes that and embraces that power. She also stressed the importance of not living for others and the lessons life has taught her.
“I’ve been to countless weddings, and I’ve been in countless weddings. I’m a generally older bride. So when women in my demographic get married, and you and your husband are busy working people like us, you deserve to have the one you want to have,” she shares.
“This is what we wanted to do. Our loved ones love and support us. We did so much to honor them, but we also wanted to start our own tradition, legacy, and creation. I'm not going to be pulled back into ideas of the past when I’m trying to create a future with my partner. “
If you’d like to see more of the couple, you probably won’t have to wait long. Although no content is planned yet, she admits to being an oversharer. “Me being open and transparent about my experiences lets people know it’s okay to have flaws; it makes you human, and for many years, I didn’t believe that was okay. I had pressure to be perfect, and I’d crumble every time,” she explains to xoNecole.
Now, she owns her flaws and uses them as a superpower to connect with her community and feel and express her love.
“Some people give us [Skyh and KJ] a hard time because they say we just seem too perfect. I’m like, why is that a bad thing? I love the people I love. From my man to my mama, to my friends - unabashedly. We move through time and space how we want to move. If we did it another way, we’d let ourselves and our union down.”
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Feature image by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
