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I Use Jewelry To Tap Into My Spirituality & Sexuality
I honestly was just looking for a part-time job; not a spiritual awakening. So when I became a fine jewelry consultant, little did I know I was in for a journey. The job was meant to be temporary and I never thought that it'd become anything other than something to do three to four times a week. But I quickly fell in love with the jewelry, taking the time to really appreciate the art and design of the pieces.
I was attracted to the beauty and the delicateness of gemstones and gold.
After setting aside a few coins, I decided to indulge myself in a 14-karat white-gold anniversary band with one-carat worth of diamond accents. It was the first piece of fine jewelry that I had ever purchased for myself. It was also the first piece of jewelry that I wore daily. It soon became a piece I'd never take off.
Before buying the ring, I had never paid much attention to my hands. Mainly because I'd consider myself to have chubby hands, and I never grew up with an appreciation for them. But by wearing my ring every day, I began to see my fingers and hands in a whole new light. They seemed tender, delicate, and sensual.
I began paying extra attention to getting my nails done, keeping my hands soft and supple, and being more intentional and graceful in the movements of my hand. I noticed all of these subtle changes in my behavior and attitude about my hands from just from wearing the ring.
After that, I wanted to see what else I could use jewelry to tap into.
As I worked my way through the ranks and worked in various levels of the fine jewelry industry, I added dozens of pieces of jewelry to my collection: delicate gold necklaces, bracelets, earrings, anklets, waist chains, golden bralettes, and more rings to my collection.
Each piece has helped me tap into sides of sensuality and sexuality that I didn't even know I was repressing.
Feeling the gentle touch of the stones and metals awakened senses in erogenous zones all over my body. Neck, wrists, ankles, tips of toes, tops of fingers, the ears, the waist, lips, nose and the chest are all considered by sexual health experts to be the top erogenous zones (otherwise known as areas most sensitive to touch).
Wearing jewelry that grazed against the tender skin made me pay more attention areas, and made me start to fall in love with all the different parts of my body.
I fell in love with the way that gold necklaces felt hugging my neck, drawing attention from my clavicle all the way down into the shadows of my cleavage.
Anklets made me pay more attention to my ankles and feet, and in turn I began to feel more grounded.
Bracelets made me feel tall and graceful; feeling the cool gold on my wrists made my arms feel lighter.
Waist chains and golden bralettes were my own little secret, pieces that the public didn't see but I could feel. I would be in a meeting and could feel the cool metal against my skin; the touch of the jewelry making me love the curves of my hips, the roundness of my belly, and the soft spots below my breasts.
Wearing a small diamond in my lip piercing made me pay attention to my pout, put me in a kissing mood, and made me conscious of how I speak and how I let words form in and flow out of my mouth.
I began to hone in on parts of myself that I took for granted, and was able to vibrate higher than before. Learning to love myself though jewelry made me want to care for my temple even more. I started taking my skincare and my eating habits even more seriously, wanting not only for the gold of the jewelry to glow, but for my skin to glow as well.
Loving the way my body looked made me want to make sure that I was doing all that I could to make sure I loved how my body felt.
Along with the sensual awakening and experience I would have when wearing jewelry, it also served as a source of attraction. My golden bralette would peak beneath my blouse and catch the eye of my date and I'm sure they would wish that they were as close to me as that chain. The jewelry would also serve as a kind of foreplay. Taking off the pieces layer by layer added another level and element to intimacy that I hadn't experienced before.
Not only was it something that could give me pleasure when worn, but it also gave my partner something new to explore on my body.
I also used stones, gems, and metals to attract certain energy and to manifest visions. I wear my citrine ring when I need to manifest joy and abundance. I wear my green quartz to channel my negative energy into positive energy. I use my tanzanite to uplift my spirit and to put warmth in my heart. I wear emeralds for prosperity, diamonds for elegance, and amethyst for healing and protection.
Tapping into my spiritual side through jewelry has not only been a way to indulge in luxury, but also a channel through which I can focus my energy. Just as one would adorn an altar with crystals, wands, and points, I adorn myself with crystals and gems for attraction and protection.
I love seeing black women indulge in luxury and all the while find their strength. I would love for all women to have a piece of jewelry that they wear regularly, and let it serve as a reminder to love, honor, and explore your body and your spirit.
Featured image via Giphy
This article is sponsored by Hulu.
UnPrisonedhas returned for its highly anticipated second season, delving deeper into the complex dynamics of the Alexander family.
The series premiere comes a year after its debut season garnered rave reviews from fans and critics and earned record-breaking ratings for Hulu's Onyx Collective brand. UnPrisoned's success can be attributed to its raw, relatable themes and comedic appeal.
Inspired by creator Tracy McMillan's life, the show follows Paige (Kerry Washington), a therapist and single mother whose life takes an unexpected turn when her father, Edwin (Delroy Lindo) --who was released from prison-- moves in with her and her teenage son, Finn (Faly Rakotohavana).
Throughout UnPrisoned's first season, viewers witnessed how Edwin's incarceration deeply affected Paige's life and relationships. In the series, Paige unpacks her trauma through interactions with her inner child and her online followers. Meanwhile, Edwin is overcoming specific struggles with his own past that led to his life of crime, including a dysfunctional upbringing and his mother's arrest. As the Alexanders attempt to reconcile, new challenges arise.
This new season promises to further explore their unconventional family dynamic. Here are several compelling reasons why season two of UnPrisoned should be on everyone's watchlist.
The Alexander Family Life Is Still In Shambles
UnPrisoned's second season resumes where the series left off, with Paige grappling with the fallout from her troubled therapy practice and Edwin navigating life independently after moving out. Meanwhile, Finn faces his own challenges. The teenager is battling anxiety and seeking information about his father—a topic Paige avoids discussing.
The Alexander Family Are Attending Therapy To Resolve Their Underlying Issues
Amid the chaos in their lives, the Alexander family decides to mend their bond by confronting their past traumas. They seek professional help and attend therapy sessions with a “family radical healing coach,” played by John Stamos, a new cast member. This collective effort aims to unravel the complexities of their shared history and strengthen their relationships.
The process of unraveling each character's internal conflicts and their potential impact on future relationships may clash with Paige's textbook therapy approach. While Paige is used to being in the therapist's seat in both career and family, this forces her into the unfamiliar role of a patient during therapy sessions. This shift would compel her to look in the mirror and try a radically different approach.
The Alexander Family Learned A Big Lesson During A Therapy Session
In therapy, the Alexanders are tasked with addressing their individual traumas to salvage their remaining relationships. One of the family therapist’s eccentric suggestions was an exercise involving a family wrestling match. During this session, Paige faces tough questions about her refusal to share information about Finn's father.
While it's unclear whether this scene is reality or fantasy, the image of the family duking it out in the ring certainly makes for hilarious yet compelling television.
Paige Tries Dating Again Following Failed Relationships
Amid her life's chaos, Paige decides to step back into the dating field. However, her many attempts have left her with mixed results. The dating apps have turned out to be a fail, and an outing with her ex Mal (Marque Richardson), who is also her father's parole officer, doesn’t go quite as expected after he brings an unexpected guest – his new girlfriend.
The situation takes an awkward turn when Mal's new partner learns why the former couple split, partly due to Paige's self-sabotage.
UnPrisoned Is A Perfect Balance Of Comedy And Drama
As a dramedy, UnPrisoned takes a comedic approach to its heavy subjects. The show takes us on a ride with Paige's dating misadventures and navigating a friendship with her ex.
Other lighthearted moments include Edwin's attempts at CPR based on online videos and, of course, the antics of the Alexander family's unconventional new healing coach.
The second season of UnPrisoned is now available on Hulu.
UnPrisoned | Season 2 Trailer | Hulu
Feature image courtesy
Blair Underwood Initially Turned Down 'Sex And The City' Because 'It Was About How Samantha Was Fascinated By Dating A Black Man’
Actor and heartthrob Blair Underwood is opening up about why he turned down Sex and the City the first time he was offered a role. Many fans of the HBO series may recall Blair's time on the show in which his character was dating Miranda (Cynthia Nixon). However, he was previously offered another role where his character would date Samantha (Kim Cattrall).
During his interview with AV Club, the Set It Off star revealed that he was uncomfortable with the initial offer due to the character's fascination with him being a Black man.
“I actually did say ‘no’ the first time,” he said. “The first time they had offered the role, to be honest with you, it was about how Samantha was fascinated by dating a Black man and wanted to know if, uh, all of the rumors were true about our anatomy! And I said, ‘Listen, I’m honored, thank you, but I just don’t want to play a character based on race, on curiosity about a Black man.'”
But that didn't stop them from reaching out again. This time he was offered to play Dr. Robert Leeds, the love interest to Miranda and he decided to go for it. "So they were nice enough to call about a year later, and I said, 'Well, is it gonna be about race?' And they said, 'No, no, no, we’re not even gonna mention race!' And I think it really did only come up maybe once," he recalled.
"It did five episodes, and I think Samantha mentioned it once, saying something about 'a Black doctor' that Miranda was dating. And that’s really been a consistent thing in my career: not wanting to be boxed as 'the Black guy.'
"I’ve had that conversation with many producers along the way, and they were so great. They said, 'No, he’s just a doctor who Miranda meets in the elevator, and they have a nice little fling.' And it was amazing."
Blair has had a wide-ranging career playing everything from a lawyer on L.A. Law to playing Madame CJ Walker's husband on Self Made: Inspired by the Life of Madame CJ Walker. And during his interview, he revealed another role that he initially turned down, Set It Off. The movie, which is considered a classic in Black culture, stars Queen Latifah, Jada Pinkett Smith, Vivica A. Fox, and Kimberly Elise. Blair's character, Keith, played a banker and love interest to Jada's character, Stony.
He explained why he said no at first and eventually accepted the offer. "I had initially said “no” to that. Because I was playing this historic, iconic African-American historical figure in Jackie Robinson, and the time, y’know, there was Boyz N The Hood, and Menace II Society was out there, and I’d finished playing this noble Negro… [Laughs]," he said.
"And I’m reading the script, and there’s a scene where Jada Pinkett’s character—Jada Pinkett-Smith now—was going to sell her body so she could make some money to send her brother to college. And I remember, honestly, I threw the script across the room. I was, like, “I don’t want to do this. I want to do something uplifting for the Black culture and Black characters, and I don’t know if I want to see this.”
After a conversation with the movie's director F. Gary Gray and the actor's manager encouraging him to finish reading the script, Blair had a change of heart. What he first thought about the movie turned out to be totally different.
"So I finished the script, and I saw that the character they were asking me to play was really the love story in the midst of all of this turmoil of all of these characters, the four ladies: Queen Latifah, Vivica Fox, Kimberly Elise, and Jada," he explained.
"It was so well-written, it was such a great platform for them. And to be able to play the love story and the storyline that gave Jada’s character a leg up and a way out of this world, something to hope for, to wish for, someone to love her… I said, 'You know what? I’d like to be a part of that.'
"And I’m so glad I did, because that film resonates to this day. People all the time come up to me and say that they love that movie. So I’m glad that I did it."