Money Talks is an xoNecole series where we talk candidly to real women about how they spend money, their relationship with money, and how they spend it.
When you think of a nurse practitioner, you may think of the extras from Grey's Anatomy staged behind Jesse Williams. However, this specific one is doing anything but taking a backseat in the audience, especially when it comes to her finances. 44-year-old Princess Lomax is a family nurse practitioner by day and a sports bar owner at night, all while juggling and maintaining her doctoral candidacy at Valparaiso University. Lomax is conducting in-home assessments for the Medicare population and is the proud owner of Diamonds Sports Bar & Grill, so it's no wonder why she's able to write a book on taking your career to the next level.
Courtesy of Princess Lomax
The Atlanta-based serial entrepreneur's best-selling Amazon book 6 Highly Effective Strategies For Making 6 Figures As A Nurse is a compilation of real-life accounts and experiences of entrepreneurship while becoming a nurse. If you're a young Black woman in the healthcare industry looking to elevate your career beyond the examination room and medical jargon, it might be the read for you.
In this installment of "Money Talks," xoNecole spoke with the Chicago-bred nurse practitioner, real estate investor, and bonafide hustler about making well over six figures a year, splurging on her half a million-dollar home and flipping houses as an extra stream of revenue.
On how much she saves per month:
"Right now, I don't have a set goal for saving on a monthly basis, however, I'm in the process of setting up a portfolio that will allow me to start having money automatically deducted from my account that will go towards an IRA and money for investing in stocks."
On her definitions of wealth and success:
"I define wealth as the power to acquire whatever you desire and the power to put other people in positions to become successful. Being wealthy for me is about putting measures in place so that everybody around me can become wealthy also. I have the desire to uplift and motivate the people around me so that we can attain generational wealth and break generational curses.
"I define success as accomplishing and attaining the goals you've set for yourself. Success for me is a never-ending cycle because I'm always thinking of a master plan to achieve something higher than my last accomplishment. Not that I'm never satisfied, but I always push myself to a higher level that surpasses my current level. It's always me against me. I'm always striving to defeat the old me so that my success will continue to grow."
On the lowest she’s ever felt when it came to her finances and how she overcame it:
"I was born poor and raised in the heart of the ghetto so it doesn't get any lower than that. There were times growing up when I wasn't sure where my next meal was coming from. I didn't have the luxury of heat and hot water, so figuring out where I would bath from day to day was once a lifestyle I endured.
"I overcame being poor by thinking rich and pushing myself until I no longer had to figure out where my next meal was going to come from. I sometimes still have fears of not being able to eat, which is why I continue to grind like my next meal is depending on it. I sometimes have flashbacks of my struggling childhood and pray that God continues to bless me so that I will never have to endure those hardships again. So for me, I overcame it by never forgetting my struggle and by pushing myself on a daily basis to stay on top."
Courtesy of Princess Lomax
"I overcame being poor by thinking rich and pushing myself until I no longer had to figure out where my next meal was going to come from. I sometimes still have fears of not being able to eat, which is why I continue to grind like my next meal is depending on it. I sometimes have flashbacks of my struggling childhood and pray that God continues to bless me so that I will never have to endure those hardships again."
On her biggest splurge to date:
"My latest biggest splurge was the purchase of my new home which was over a half of million dollars. Splurging in the past for me has been the purchasing of Chanel bags, Christian Louboutins, and expensive cars. This year, God has allowed me to level up and splurge in a different way. I'm now a homeowner so my splurging this year has been phenomenal."
On whether she’s a spender or a saver:
"Unfortunately, I am a spender and sometimes wish I was a saver. Growing up poor and not having much of anything and not having anyone in my life to teach me about saving has unfortunately hindered me from being a saver. At one point, I was spending more than I was making, but as my entrepreneurship continues to grow, I'm learning how to save and plan for retirement. I'm still in the process of training myself to save and not spend. My training has just begun and plans for my future and retirement are at the beginning stages."
Courtesy of Princess Lomax
"Growing up poor and not having much of anything and not having anyone in my life to teach me about saving has unfortunately hindered me from being a saver. At one point, I was spending more than I was making, but as my entrepreneurship continues to grow, I'm learning how to save and plan for retirement. I'm still in the process of training myself to save and not spend."
On her savings goals and what retirement looks like to her:
"My saving goal is to save a minimum of $20K a month so that I can retire by the age of 50. Retirement for me as a Nurse Practitioner will be within the next 5-10 years and I don't think I'll really ever retire as an entrepreneur."
On the importance of investing:
"Most of my money has been attained via investing, so investing is extremely important to me. I've learned that if I invest in the right assets, my portfolio during retirement will be prosperous. I invest in real estate purchases and acquiring businesses. I invest mostly in real estate in the Chicagoland area and also invest in multiple businesses that will become great assets in the near future."
On her intentions behind multiple streams of revenue:
"My streams of revenue were established by buying and flipping houses and by owning and operating a successful nightclub and sports bar in the Chicagoland area. Having multiple streams of income became a way of life for me after having slow periods with both real estate and the nightlife industry. Having multiple streams of income has allowed me to continue to be successful without having too many periods of dry spells without income coming in."
On unhealthy money habits and mindsets:
"The number one unhealthy habit that I had to restructure is feeling like I always had to go shopping for the latest Chanel bag and or the latest pair of Christian Louboutins. Once I changed my mindset, I saw the bigger picture for saving and investing more. I now know that I can still look and be great while attending parties and/or events without having to buy a new pair of shoes and or a new bag."
Courtesy of Princess Lomax.
"My streams of revenue were established by buying and flipping houses and by owning and operating a successful nightclub and sports bar in the Chicagoland area. Having multiple streams of income has allowed me to continue to be successful without having too many periods of dry spells without income coming in."
On her money mantra:
"Keep God first and don't ever allow the money to change who you are on the inside."
On desperate times calling for desperate measures:
"Yes, yes, and hell yes. I'm not proud of some of the things I've done in my past for financial gain, however, it has been a part of making me the successful female CEO that I am today. "
On the worst money-related decision she’s ever made:
"The worst money-related decision I ever made was not to invest early-on in stocks. I truly feel that if I had invested in stocks like Amazon instead of buying shoes and bags, my portfolio would be near retirement by now."
On her budget breakdown:
How much do you spend on rent?
"I'm a homeowner now, which allows me to spend less on [a] mortgage than I was paying on renting. $4,000 month."
Eating out/ordering in?
"Both $500 per month."
Gas/car note?
"$2,000 per month."
Personal expenses?
"$3,000 per month."
For more of Princess, check out her website.
Featured image courtesy of Princess Lomax
Originally published on October 9, 2020
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Some women have their whole wedding planned out, from the bridal gown and venue to the bridal party and playlist. However, KJ was not one of those people. “I didn’t foresee a wedding in my future,” she reveals. “I was just gonna be the boss chick, rich auntie. I didn’t force love in my life until recently. I never had an idea of what a dream wedding would look like, it was easier for me to elope.”
KJ Smith
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
And to many people’s surprise, that was their original plan – until Skyh brought up a valid concern. He was raised by his grandmother and thought she should be at the wedding, and naturally, that led to KJ wanting her grandmother to be there as well – then her mom – and later her sister – and, you’ve gotta invite the besties too, right? From there, the guest list continued to blossom. Much like the updo and pop of color bold red lip, she wore on her special day, which was initially on her Pinterest board as a soft glam look with her hair hanging on her shoulders, KJ is okay with changing her plan if it brings her and her loved ones happiness.
So let’s get into the wedding, which took place in Malibu, CA. The first thing you should know about the celebrity couple is that they’re non-traditional. They know, and they don’t care. So, in true unconventional fashion, they shared the morning of the wedding together.
“I woke up with Skyh, we walked our dog, had black coffee, and said good morning to the people who stayed at the venue with us,” she says.
Now, it was time for hair and makeup. While she was getting glammed up, she had Black-owned McBride Sisters wine and champagne (which ties into The Black Experience theme) on deck with her mom and friends, had her besties help rework her vows, retried on every outfit (sis is very Type-A), took photos, and ended the early-celebration with prayer and meditation. It seems very non-Bridezilla, I said.
“Yeah, I was the most unbothered bride ever. Everyone was just so supportive. As entertainers, we go on red carpets all the time. We actually have a production company,” she explains. “The get-ready process was like a day at work, but with people we love the most. Being entertainers, we didn’t feel stressed at all, but my excitement was so high.”
Things moved quickly, and before she knew it, it was time to line up to walk down the aisle.
“Yeah, I was the most unbothered bride ever. Everyone was just so supportive. As entertainers, we go on red carpets all the time. We actually have a production company. The get-ready process was like a day at work, but with people we love the most. Being entertainers, we didn’t feel stressed at all, but my excitement was so high.”
KJ Smith and her bridal party
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
Since everything started with their grandmothers, the couple wanted to ensure they honored them and planned to keep an element of their wedding traditional. Although we’ve all seen the reception videos and photos online, you may have noticed visuals from the wedding itself are harder to find.
“We planned for it to be traditional, but we’re not like that, so we tried to create those moments. We jumped the broom and had a salt ceremony (where the bride and groom individually pour salt into a glass container, symbolizing their lives becoming one.) But honestly, still, nothing was traditional about it.”
She goes on to explain that her mom caught the holy ghost coming down the aisle, her glam team was on deck, and she became so nervous with excitement that she had an anxiety attack – something she struggled with for years, she explains tearfully. Her friends had to literally cheer her down the aisle because of how overwhelmed she felt until she eventually calmed down.
“Skyh was standing there with his hand on his heart; we have our own little language, and I could feel the support,” she shares.
It was surprising to hear all these emotional moments happened before the party we saw online. That is until she once again got into the backstory.
“As a Black woman actress, for so long, it was popular to be mysterious and secretive, but that’s not who I am or what I like. Plus, we both wanted to create an experience for everyone there. We are the people who always host family and friends,” she says. “Like for me, the first order of business was getting sandals for the women so they can dance all night long. We had oxtail, D'ussé, and a coffee and sativa lounge – which is part of Skyh and I’s lifestyle and routine. We wanted to bring them into our world.”
Skyh Black (L) and KJ Smith (R)
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
She went on to discuss the dance routine she did for her husband at the reception, which has taken over the internet. Apparently, that’s another thing that didn’t go according to plan. According to KJ, she had promised a performance at their joint bachelor/ bachelorette party, but her outfit got stolen from her car. So, Skyh ended up performing for her – complete with a strip tease. Still, she never forgot her promise to dance for him.
So, she hired her friend as a choreographer, learned the routine, made friends and family watch it endless times, and attended Beyoncé’s Renaissance show a few days before for a confidence boost. It ended up being a show to remember. But that wasn’t all the night offered. Lil Mo performed, and the guests received special goody bags featuring their favorite Black-owned products like journals, hair care, and more.
“We made sure everyone was taken care of all night. That kind of stuff makes us happy. I wanted everyone there to experience the joy and love I have for myself, my partner, and for them. I wanted them to feel full and whole, and they had the time of their lives,” she says.
But naturally, the internet is going to internet, and while there were countless people praising the event and applauding the newlyweds, some thought it was too over the top. I was curious to know her thoughts on some of the criticism.
“It’s cool. We did what we wanted to do. I’ve decided to share my world with people. Just how I went on social media platforms and found inspiration, I want people to do the same,” she explains. “I don’t think it's fair to my supporters not to give that out. There’s so much I wanna share with brides, specifically Black brides. I love that people are adding it to their Pinterest boards."
"I wanted everyone there to experience the joy and love I have for myself, my partner, and for them. I wanted them to feel full and whole, and they had the time of their lives."
KJ Smith
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
“I’m happy with it because we did what we wanted to do. They can do what they wanna do. Don’t be cruel, though, because you will get blocked,” she said, laughing.
The more I spoke with her, the more her sense of freedom shined through. People are always going to have their opinions, but at the end of the day, it’s you who has to live your life, and it seems like the couple realizes that and embraces that power. She also stressed the importance of not living for others and the lessons life has taught her.
“I’ve been to countless weddings, and I’ve been in countless weddings. I’m a generally older bride. So when women in my demographic get married, and you and your husband are busy working people like us, you deserve to have the one you want to have,” she shares.
“This is what we wanted to do. Our loved ones love and support us. We did so much to honor them, but we also wanted to start our own tradition, legacy, and creation. I'm not going to be pulled back into ideas of the past when I’m trying to create a future with my partner. “
If you’d like to see more of the couple, you probably won’t have to wait long. Although no content is planned yet, she admits to being an oversharer. “Me being open and transparent about my experiences lets people know it’s okay to have flaws; it makes you human, and for many years, I didn’t believe that was okay. I had pressure to be perfect, and I’d crumble every time,” she explains to xoNecole.
Now, she owns her flaws and uses them as a superpower to connect with her community and feel and express her love.
“Some people give us [Skyh and KJ] a hard time because they say we just seem too perfect. I’m like, why is that a bad thing? I love the people I love. From my man to my mama, to my friends - unabashedly. We move through time and space how we want to move. If we did it another way, we’d let ourselves and our union down.”
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Feature image by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
