Black Minimalists Share What They Stopped Buying In Order To Live Their Best Lives
What does it really mean to "have everything"? I suppose it depends on what you define as everything. From achieving your goals to living the life you didn't have as a child to living unapologetically, having everything isn't always qualified and quantified by material things. This way of thinking is related to the minimalist lifestyle – an existence that is rooted in happiness when living with less.
For minimalists, they value experiences over possessions.
Minimalism is not for the faint of heart. The 'less is more' concept is one that requires discipline, consistency, and intention. We have watched as the minimalist theory swept across varying fields from fashion to interior design to photography. It is such a beautiful way of life, and we are in awe of how Black women apply the theory to their lives.
So, we talked with four Black women who aren't new to minimalism; they are true to minimalism. Keep reading for why they made the choice, how their upbringing affected their decision, and their advice for other women.
Editor's Note: This story was originally published in 2021 and is being republished for its continued relevance. The journeys shared below reflect the women's perspectives at the time.
Whitney Roberts
Courtesy of Whitney Roberts
When did you adapt to the minimalist lifestyle?
I have been a minimalist for about four years now. I adopted minimalism because I was honestly tired of stuff. As a writer, I find clutter to be distracting. To keep me as focused as possible, I try to eliminate as much of it as possible.
What was the hardest obstacle in making this change?
Getting rid of certain things. For me, clothes were easy to clear out as I made the practice of clearing my wardrobe every season change in order to donate. The most difficult things to get rid of were my books! I love to read and managed to get my hands on many rare copies.
How did your upbringing affect your choice to become a minimalist?
Majorly! My mom is big on giving things away that we aren't using. She's really generous. I would like to think I inherited her generosity. On the other hand, one of my grandparents was a huge hoarder. They would buy things just to have them and wouldn't share. I saw how that affected their lives and how, in the end, all they had was their stuff.
What things did you stop buying in order to feel freer financially?
CLOTHES! I said earlier how easy they were to give away and unless I need something, I rarely shop for clothes. And you will be surprised how quickly the savings add up when you're not constantly shopping for things that are in style today and out tomorrow.
Can you share your biggest joy since you made the modifications?
The biggest joy is handing over that box of things I don't need knowing that they are going to people who do need them. I recently cleared some gently-used dishes I didn't need and, afterward, found a family that didn't have any. Handing them that box and sharing in that moment of gratitude (them grateful for the dishes and me grateful to help) was a big joy.
What advice do you have for women wanting to live life minimally?
Start small. You don't have to reduce all of your items in one day, or even in one month! Take your time. Choose one area at a time. Go through each item, one at a time, and ask yourself if you really NEED it or not. It's totally doable. Just go at your own pace.
For more of Whitney, follow her on Instagram.
Danae Smith
Courtesy of Danae Smith
When did you adapt to the minimalist lifestyle?
I started my minimalist journey in 2015 but in the last couple of years, I've really leaned into the slowness and simplicity of minimalism.
What was the hardest obstacle in making this change?
The hardest obstacle was unlearning rushing and learning to let go. Decluttering spaces wasn't too hard. I could easily let go of clothes and shoes that didn't spark joy, but for me, it was hard to let go of items that held memories. It's a process, but minimalism has challenged my need to hold on to all the things, be that something tangible or intangible. As for unlearning rushing, embracing minimalism has and continues to challenge my need to rush on to the next thing, be that a trend or literally how I move from one space to the next.
I'm constantly learning to slow down and be still, to give the moment in front of me my full attention.
"I'm constantly learning to slow down and be still, to give the moment in front of me my full attention."
How did your upbringing affect your choice to become a minimalist?
I didn't grow up in a minimalistic home, but I did grow up in a home that valued delayed gratification, imaginative play, and reading over television, etc. I grew up in a home that did not follow trends a ton and that has deeply impacted how I move through life now. In some ways, the way I grew up helped make the adjustment to a more minimalist lifestyle a little easier.
What things did you stop buying in order to feel freer financially?
I think the first items to receive a personal budget cut were clothes and shoes. Nowadays, I aim to purchase clothing items that are aesthetically pleasing and functional with the ability to be worn in multiple seasons and styled differently each time. Doing the 10x10 challenge really helped me to get creative with the clothes I already owned. I also worked really hard at not eating out a ton, especially for lunch. I worked in D.C. for a while so it was easy to go to a food truck or chain restaurant to grab lunch. Of course, as with any journey, some days were definitely easier than others.
Can you share your biggest joy since you made the modifications?
My biggest joy has been giving myself permission to slow down and be fully present in a given moment.
What advice do you have for women wanting to live life minimally?
Don't feel pressured to pursue minimalism in any particular way. You don't have to suddenly don neutral tones or have a home barely furnished. You can pursue minimalism in full color with a cozy living space or whatever your vibe is. In my eyes, minimalism isn't just an aesthetic. It's a lifestyle choice that makes room for what matters and what you value. How that looks and unfolds in your life can and will look different from the next person.
For more of Danae, follow her on Instagram.
Jaznel Mosby aka J. Chavae or Jaz
Courtesy of Jaznel Mosby
When did you adapt to the minimalist lifestyle?
I adapted to the minimalist, more so essentialist, lifestyle about four to five years ago.
What was the hardest obstacle in making this change?
The hardest obstacle in making this change was thinking that I had to have five to 10 items in my possession when in reality, it was being conscious of what I needed and what truly made me happy.
How did your upbringing affect your choice to become a minimalist?
Growing up, my mother had so many random things in high volume that she didn't need or use, be it shoes, food, cups, etc. I knew that it was because of a lack mentality (she grew up pretty poor in Jamaica) so I did have sympathy for her, but it drove me NUTS! I became obsessed with organizing first, then minimalism/essentialism was introduced to me and the game changed!
What things did you stop buying in order to feel freer financially?
I had to stop buying clothes and shoes. I was a real shopaholic in my early 20's, buying things for their photo potential regardless of wearability or comfort, but minimalism helped me kick that to the curb. I would always tell myself that I didn't have money when in reality, I did have money, I was spending it all on shoes, clothes, and FOOD.
Can you share your biggest joy since you made the modifications?
My biggest joy since this lifestyle change has been filling my home with things that I absolutely need and that I absolutely LOVE. Everything has a purpose and a place which makes my compartmentalized mind very happy!
What advice do you have for women wanting to live life minimally?
The advice that I would give to women wanting to live minimally or essentially is to add before you subtract. It's like wanting to be healthier. If you cut everything out, you're going to crave it more often and probably give in...the same applied to me when it came to my things. Figure out what you love and what you need, incorporate those items in your life and then give thanks to what you don't need or love (think Marie Kondo-style).
I also released things much easier when I gave them to someone I knew/loved. It made me happy knowing that they would use something that was simply taking up space in my home!
For more of Jaznel, follow her on Instagram.
Christine Platt
Courtesy of Christine Platt
When did you adapt to the minimalist lifestyle?
I began adapting a minimalist lifestyle in the summer of 2016 but in all honesty, I had no idea what I was doing. I was so focused on trying to mirror the neutral, barren aesthetics I saw online. It wasn't until 2017 when I began focusing on being authentic and intentional with my personal style that I truly began adapting to a minimalist lifestyle. For me, that looks like Afrominimalism—a home and wardrobe that reflects the history and beauty of the African diaspora.
The shift to being authentic and intentional was so pivotal! It is what led me to write The Afrominimalist's Guide to Living Less, to really encourage more people, especially Black people, to embrace the practice of minimalism more holistically. Being a conscious consumer has more benefits than having a tidy house and benefiting the environment. It is an opportunity for our community to use their resources to build generational wealth—and for many of us, we are the first people in our families to have the opportunity to do so.
What was the hardest obstacle in making this change?
The hardest obstacle wasn't sorting through everything to decide what I wanted to keep and what I wanted to let go (which is what I thought would be the hardest part). I was very surprised at the emotional work that came with the letting go process. I had to acknowledge what aspects of my childhood led to my excessive spending. I had to acknowledge that I had so many things but so little savings. And I had to forgive myself for all the decisions and choices that led to my overindulgence.
But ironically, I believe emotional labor is one of the most important parts of the process. Honoring my feelings has been essential to maintaining a lifestyle with less. And I really encourage anyone who is planning to or in the process of decluttering to embrace the anger, frustration, sadness, tears, and whatever other emotions emerge. It is important to first know the reasons why you have more than you need, and then honor the emotions that come with that understanding. If not, it is likely that you will continue the same spending habits and find yourself in the same situation again.
"Honoring my feelings has been essential to maintaining a lifestyle with less."
How did your upbringing affect your choice to become a minimalist?
I am so glad that you asked this question! How we were raised plays an important role in why so many people have more than they need. From how we saw our caregivers handle money to fulfilling unmet childhood expectations, there are aspects from our past that have influenced our relationship with money and spending habits. When I was younger, my mother and I spent the weekends shopping, and it was always my favorite part of the week. We had so much fun together! And so, I associated shopping with fun, with rewarding myself, with enjoying the fruits of my labor.
When I began adapting a minimalist lifestyle, I realized what a significant role my childhood played in my emotional spending, as well as the cultural influences and other aspects of my identity, such as being a first-generation everything. I have since become very intentional about breaking that cycle with my daughter and sharing my experiences with others so they can learn from my experiences.
What things did you stop buying in order to feel freer financially?
Okay, I want to address a misconception about minimalists—we buy things all the time! We are just 1) very very intentional about what we purchase and 2) constantly letting go of things that no longer serve us to make space for what matters. In order to be financially freer, I had to learn the reason behind my excess (the mindless consumerism and bargain shopping), and refrain from those behaviors. It's how I came up with a mantra that I sometimes still must use when I am shopping: "Remember, it's not a deal if you don't need it."
Can you share your biggest joy since you made the modifications?
Oh, my goodness! There is so much joy! Having savings is such a big part of my joy. Understanding my power as a conscious consumer and investing in my community. There is such joy in being intentional with where and how I spend my money.
What advice do you have for women wanting to live life minimally?
You know, I recently read this beautiful interview in ELLE with Taylour Paige who plays Dussie in Ma Rainey's Black Bottom (which the historian and lover of Black storytelling in me is just obsessed with that movie. Just, gah!) It just felt like I was having a conversation with a young Black woman on her way to understanding and seizing every opportunity in her lifetime. One thing that Taylour said really struck me: "We're all eternal. And this is just a blip in eternity. But if I can be conscious of that, why do anything I don't want to do?"
If you want to live more minimally, do it! And be fully conscious of and committed to your decision. And don't be afraid to make it your own. For me, it's Afrominimalism. But for you, it may be something entirely different. Think of minimalism as intentionalism. Be intentional about creating the life you want to live.
For more of Christine, follow her on Instagram.
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Originally published on January 15, 2021
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This Is How To Keep 'Holiday Season Stress' From Infecting Your Relationship
Hmph. Maybe it’s just me, but it seems like there is something really weird happening in the fall season air (because winter doesn’t officially begin until December 21) that cuddle season is in full swing while break-up season is as well. In fact, did you know that break-ups are so popular during the holiday season that December 11 is deemed Break-Up Day?
The reasons why relationships shift around this time vary; however, I did both roll my eyes and chuckle when I read that a very popular one is because it’s an easy way to get out of getting one’s significant other a Christmas present. SMDH.
Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
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Unmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
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Okay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
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If off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
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A friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
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It’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
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I once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
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Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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Sergio Hudson On Designing With Intention And Who Gets Left Out Of The Industry
Sergio Hudson dreamt big as a young South Carolina boy staring out of the window of his mom’s Volvo driving down the Ridgeway, South Carolina streets. Those dreams led him to design opulent tailoring that’s been worn by Beyoncé, Queen Latifah, former Vice President Kamala Harris and Forever First Lady Michelle Obama, just to name a few.
Those dreams have come full circle in a new way as he recently collaborated with Volvo for a mini capsule collection suitable for chic and stylish moments this fall. The 40-year-old designer follows a long legacy of fashion aficionados who’ve used their innovation to push the automotive industry forward, including Virgil Abloh, Eddie Bauer, Paul Smith and Jeremy Scott.
Using the same material from the interior of the Volvo EX90, Hudson crafted a wool-blend car coat and waistbelt that combine the vehicle’s Scandinavian design with his signature tailoring and intention. The exclusive collection launched on October 20, and each piece is made-to-order by Sergio Hudson Collections.
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In October, I traveled to Charleston with a group of journalists to get a firsthand look at Hudson and Volvo’s location. During a fitting, Hudson said his goal is to make “great work that can stand the test of time.”
“People can look back on and say, ‘I remember when Sergio did that collaboration with Volvo,’” he continued. “Thinking about aligning yourself with classic brands that speak to where you want to go. And I think that's what this collaboration kind of means to me and my business.”
Hudson pinpoints his mom as the biggest influence for his designs. This collaboration was no different.
“This particular coat reminded me of the swing coats that my mom used to wear in the early 90s. You know, diva girls in the early 90s had Sandra suits,” he said, referring to Jackée Harry’s character in 227. “My mom wore those and she would have these matching swing coats to go over them. And that's where the initial idea came. This would be around the same time that we had our Volvo. So she would put on her suit, her swing coat, get in that red Volvo, and go to church.”
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With this capsule and beyond, Hudson wants to see more staples rotating in and out of closets this fall. He advises fashionistas to build her closet out with essentials to mix and match that aren’t just stylish but also sustainable.
“It's just those special pieces,” he said. “You can wear the same shirt and pants every day and nobody will notice. But if you have a special boot, a special coat, a special bill, a special bag, that kind of speaks to everything that your style stands about, that is something you should focus on.”
These are the same kind of staple pieces that return to our Pinterest boards and TikTok feeds season after season. Fast fashion has never been Hudson’s aim. “I'm trying to create a special pieces that can stand the test of time,” he said in his warm, Southern accent. “I'm only creating those kind of pieces from here on out.”
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For Hudson, this collaboration is revolutionary. It’s his first time working with a car company and experimenting outside of his wheelhouse in this way.
“This is a Scandinavian brand, and, you know, it's 70 years old. I'm an African-American boy from South Carolina that has had a brand for 10 years. So I think bridging those two worlds and seeing the similarities was the beauty of this project,” he explained.
Though Hudson and his partner and CEO of Sergio Hudson Collections Inga Beckham have made massive strides in just 10 years, Hudson said the industry is far from where he wants to see it when it comes to Black representation. He pointed to how few Black designers were at this year’s Met Gala despite the theme being Black dandyism.
“The fact that I dressed 18 people speaks to how many of us weren't there,” he said. He implored more of industries, fashion and beyond, to collaborate with Black designers often.
“Allow mentorship. Allow funding. Allow great design to shine through,” he implored. “When it comes to being a designer of African descent, when you can't get the funding that your counterparts have, you can't compete. When you get opportunities like doing a collaboration with Volvo, or you get opportunities to be at the Met Gala, that's putting us on the equal playing field, but really the funding behind it is what we need to take it to that desk level.”
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