
How Pressing Pause Keeps LaChina Robinson's Broadcasting Game Strong

In xoNecole's Finding Balance, we profile boss women making boss moves in the world and in their respective industries. We talk to them about their business, their life, and most of all, what they do to find balance in their busy lives.
LaChina Robinson is one of the most admirable women in the sports media disrupting the broadcasting industry one game at a time. Of course, before she was the LaChina Robinson that we all know and love from ESPN, Fox Sports 1, and NBATV, she was a 6'4" 14-year-old girl who was struggling to find her place in the world on top of day-to-day teen angst. Once she gave basketball a try, she felt like she belonged for the first time, which allowed her to tap into her strength, find her voice, embrace her unique features and eventually earn a college scholarship.
"Now I get to give back to the sport that gave so much to me while also giving women's sports the spotlight it deserves and helping to increase media imagery of powerful women," the Rising Media Stars co-founder told xoNecole. Though Robinson is working tirelessly to demolish the stigmas against Black women in sports broadcasting such as lack of audience interest, not being attractive to the average viewer, and their opinions not mattering to sports fans, she knows that she's not alone in the fight for equality for women's sports reporters' rights.
"There is a look and sound brought to you by mainstream America and Black women are led to believe that we don't check the boxes. What I love about the trend we are seeing with black women in sports like Jemele Hill, Cari Champion, Maria Taylor, we are creating our own boxes, so check that!"
Just like any job, being a sports analyst comes with its ups and downs, but LaChina Robinson loves her career and the research, passion, and packaging behind the pretty picture she paints on-screen. "I love telling the story behind the athlete. I cover the WNBA which is a league of 80% Black women who are undercovered by the media, unappreciated, and overlooked," the Around The Rim podcast host shared. "I take pride in shining a light on who they are as athletes, moms, business owners, activists, philanthropists, and much more. We need to expose the world to how incredible the Black female athlete really is."
As for the future of sports journalism in relation to the inclusivity of Black women, LaChina had this to say: "I believe the future of Black women in sports media is more Black women as a play-by-play announcers, analysts, editors in the newsroom, directors, and producers on live sporting events, and much more. These spaces are lacking diversity and Black women need to be in positions of power with freedom to create, hire, make decisions, and drive the narrative."
xoNecole had the chance to speak with multifaceted sports media maven about the importance of her relationship with God, how rapping Jay-Z helps her warm up before reporting a game, and how she finally started to make dating a priority in this installment of xoNecole's "Finding Balance".
xoNecole: At what point in your life did you understand the importance of pressing pause?
LaChina Robinson: I was in my late 20's before my career in broadcasting started and I got physically ill. I could not dig myself out of this hole of physical, spiritual, and emotional suffering. When I reflect back, I had been working for two years straight without a vacation and I had nothing left. I emerged from that situation closer to God, my purpose, and definitely learned the importance of pressing pause.
What is a typical day in your life? If no day is quite the same, give me a rundown of a typical work week and what that might consist of.
Being a basketball analyst requires a lot of homework, film, interview, studying stats, and reading articles. People think that you just show up on television and talk about what you see; not even close. I am buried in research and the game itself is literally 10% of all the work you do.
What are your mornings like?
I get up, say my prayers, listen to a meditation podcast (I love the Shine App), and try not to pick up my phone, which is a daily battle. I have a cup of decaf coffee, check my schedule for the day, and I'm off and running. In a pre-pandemic year, I am on a plane at least 160 days a year so when I am home, I spend a lot of time running errands, watching film, and packing for my next trip.
How do you wind down at night?
I am a big fan of the Calm app which gets my mind drifting off into stories that take my focus off of the worries of life. I've started drinking tea more often before bed to relax. During the pandemic, I am definitely watching more Netflix and Hulu and would like to do more reading before bed but it's a work in progress.
When you have a busy week, what’s the most hectic part of it?
The most hectic week for me is when I have to be in four different cities in a week. I could have two or three games, be hosting a special event, moderate a panel discussion, and before I know it, I am only home one or two days a week; that's hard. The traveling is the hardest part. I got so used to the get-up-and-go that I don't think I fully realized how hard it is to build consistency in your life when you are never in one city for very long.
Do you practice any types of self-care? What does that look like for you?
Self-care for me is listening to a church sermon, working out, treating myself to a two-hour deep tissue massage once or twice a month, getting a mani-pedi, or going to the park and meditating, reading, stretching, and cooking when the motivation hits me.
What advice do you have for busy women who feel like they don’t have time for self-care?
You have to make time for self-care; no one can pour from an empty cup. My word over the last two years has been "replenish". I realized that I give so much of myself mentally, physically, spiritually to everyone's else's priorities, but who is going to take care of me? That is ultimately my responsibility and I deserve to take time for myself and take care of myself.
"You have to make time for self-care; no one can pour from an empty cup. My word over the last two years has been 'replenish'. I realized that I give so much of myself mentally, physically, spiritually to everyone's else's priorities, but who is going to take care of me? That is ultimately my responsibility and I deserve to take time for myself and take care of myself."
How do you find balance with:
Friends?
I have the best friends in the world because they are super understanding that my travel and work schedules are crazy. I can be going at a fast pace and then have like a month where I am not as busy so my friends either see me often or not at all. I love pool days, park days, long FaceTimes, and trying new restaurants with friends when I can.
Love/Relationships? Dating?
I finally started making dating a priority about two years ago. Something happened to me in my 30's where all of a sudden I was willing to move my life and career around to prioritize love which was a huge step for a girl who has always been career first.
Exercise?
I love the app ClassPass because I can dip into one of the many great workout classes available in Atlanta or on the road. I like a combination of muscle toning and cardio so you will find me in spin, interval training, I get bored with workouts so bouncing around in different classes keeps me excited for that next workout challenge.
What about health? Do you cook or find yourself eating out?
I am trying to like cooking but it just isn't my thing. Traveling as much as I do makes it hard on grocery shopping and cooking. I have tried a few meal prep services I like which helps to keep things healthy but I love some DoorDash, Grubhub, Postmates, definitely lifesavers for a girl on the go.
Do you ever detox?
I am a fan of fasting more than detoxing but it is something I would like to do more of. Fasting just helps me to reset my system, get my appetite under control, and keep a healthy mindset around the purpose of food which is really to nourish.
When you are going through a bout of uncertainty, or feeling stuck, how do you handle it?
Prayer. My relationship with God is the foundation of my life. I don't know where I would be without His grace and mercy. God is my best friend and the first place I turn in times of uncertainty, anxiety, or need direction.
What do you do when you have a creative block when creating concepts for a project?
I like to rap Jay-Z lyrics before my games. Not only has his music been the soundtrack to my life but when you need to get a report out and want to speak clearly and with fluidity, rap lyrics are the perfect warm-up.
Honestly, what does success mean to you? What does happiness mean to you?
My definition of success over time has changed but at this point in my career, I would say peace, purpose, and freedom. I want to be able to lay my head on the pillow every night and feel like I am in alignment with the plan God has for me, that I am proud of my personal and professional brand, and that I have freedom to be the ultimate decision-maker on where I want to put my time and energy.
For more of LaChina, follow her on Instagram!
Featured image courtesy of LaChina Robinson.
Adrian Marcel On Purpose, Sacrifice, And The 'Signs Of Life'
In this week's episode of xoMAN, host Kiara Walker talked with R&B artist Adrian Marcel, who opened up, full of heart and authenticity, about his personal evolution. He discussed his days transitioning from a young Bay Area singer on the come-up to becoming a grounded husband and father of four.
With honesty and introspection, Marcel reflected on how life, love, and loss have shaped the man he is today.
On ‘Life’s Subtle Signals’
Much of the conversation centered around purpose, sacrifice, and listening to life’s subtle signals. “I think that you really have to pay attention to the signs of life,” Marcel said. “Because as much as we need to make money, we are not necessarily on this Earth for that sole purpose, you know what I mean?” While he acknowledged his ambitions, adding, “that is not me saying at all I’m not trying to ball out,” he emphasized that fulfillment goes deeper.
“We are here to be happy. We are here [to] fulfill a purpose that we are put on here for.”
On Passion vs. Survival
Adrian spoke candidly about the tension between passion and survival, describing how hardship can sometimes point us away from misaligned paths. “If you find it’s constantly hurting you… that’s telling you something. That’s telling you that you’re going outside of your purpose.”
Marcel’s path hasn’t been without detours. A promising athlete in his youth, he recalled, “Early on in my career, I was still doing sports… I was good… I had a scholarship.” An injury changed everything. “My femur broke. Hence why I always say, you know, I’m gonna keep you hip like a femur.” After the injury, he pivoted to explore other careers, including teaching and corporate jobs.
“It just did not get me—even with any success that happened in anything—those times, back then, I was so unhappy. And you know, to a different degree. Like not just like, ‘I really want to be a singer so that’s why I’m unhappy.’ Nah, it was like, it was not fulfilling me in any form or fashion.”
On Connection Between Pursuing Music & Fatherhood
He recalled performing old-school songs at age 12 to impress girls, then his father challenged him: “You can lie to these girls all you want, but you're really just lying to yourself. You ain't growing.” That push led him to the piano—and eventually, to his truth. “Music is my love,” Marcel affirmed. “I wouldn’t be a happy husband if I was here trying to do anything else just to appease her [his wife].”
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by xoNecole/YouTube
Sometimes I get asked the same question, often enough, that I’m like, “It’s time to address this on a larger platform,” — and for, whatever the reason, as of late, folks have been asking me what different sex acts mean.
No, not from the perspective of positions or techniques. What they’ve basically wanted to know is if making love, having sex, and f-cking are simply different words to describe the same thing or if there truly is something deeper with each one.
Let me start this off by saying that of course, to a certain extent, the answer is subjective because it’s mostly opinion-rather-than-fact driven. However, I personally think that sex is hella impactful, which is why I hope that my personal breakdown will at least cause you to want to think about what you do, who you do it with, and why, more than you may have in the past.
Because although, at the end of the day, the physical aspects of making love, having sex, and f-cking are very similar, you’d be amazed by how drastically different they are in other ways…at the very same time.
Making Love
Back when I wrote my first book, I wasn’t even 30 at the time and still, one of the things that I said in it is, I pretty much can’t stand the term “make love.” Way back then, I stated that sex between two people who truly love each other and are committed for the long haul, when it comes to what they do in the bedroom, it’s so much more about CELEBRATING love than MAKING it. To make means “to produce” or “to bring into existence;” to celebrate means “to commemorate,” “to perform” or “to have or participate in a party, drinking spree, or uninhibited good time.”
The act of sex, standing alone? It can’t make love happen and honestly, believing otherwise is how a lot of people find themselves getting…got.
What do I mean? Tell me how in the world, you meet a guy, talk to him for a few weeks, don’t even know his middle name or where he was born and yet somehow, you choose to call the first time you have sex with him (under those conditions) “making love.” You don’t love him. You don’t know him well enough to love him. He doesn’t love you either (for the same reason). And yet you’re making love? How sway? Oh, but let that sex be bomb and those oxytocin highs might have you tempted to think that’s what’s happening — and that is emotionally dangerous. And yes, I mean, literally.
If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times before, that one of the reasons why I like that the Bible defines sex between a husband and his wife is by using the word “know” (Genesis 4:1) is because, well, I think that is what celebrating love is all about — we know each other well enough to know that we love each other, we know each other well enough to know that we aren’t going anywhere, and that knowing is what makes us want to celebrate that union by getting as close to one another and bringing as much physical pleasure to each other as we possibly can…as often as absolutely possible.
To me, that is what the peak of physical intimacy is all about — and the people who choose to use the term “make love,” it should be seen through this type of lens. When this type of mental and emotional bond comes together via each other’s bodies, they are amplifying love, enjoying love, embracing love.
Making it, though? Chile, the love has already been made. Sex is just the icing on the cake.
Having Sex
A few nights ago, I found myself rewatching this movie called Four of Hearts (which you can currently view on yep, you guessed it: Tubi). It’s about two married couples — one that is in an open marriage and another that isn’t although they somehow thought that sharing a night with the other couple would be a good idea (chile). Anyway, as one of the partners found themselves getting low-key sprung, the one they fell for said in one of the scenes, “It wasn’t a connection. It was just sex.” JUST. SEX.
Listen, when you decide to let a man put an entire part of his body inside of you at the risk of potentially getting an STI/STD or pregnant (because no form of birth control is 100 percent except for abstinence), it can never be “just sex” (somebody really needed to hear that too). At the same time, though, I got the character’s point because, if one or both people do not love each other or even deeply care for one another and/or sex is treated as an activity more than an act to establish a worthwhile connection and/or you and the person you are sleeping with have not really discussed what you are expecting from sex besides the act itself — you’re definitely not making/celebrating love.
Not by a long shot. What can make things get a bit complicated, though, is you’re doing the same act that “love makers” do without the same mental and emotional ties…or (sometimes) expectations.
You know, back when I decided to put all of my business out there via the piece “14 Lessons I've Learned From 14 Sex Partners,” now more than ever, I am quite clear that most of those guys fell into the “having sex” category. I wasn’t in the type of relationship with them where “making love” even made sense; however, because I was friends with most of them, we weren’t exactly f-cking (which I will get to in just a moment) either. We had a connection of some sort for the bedroom yet not enough to be together in the other rooms of the house.
We were really attracted and curious, so we decided to act on that. Oftentimes, the sex was good and so we rationalized that “having sex” was enough because if the friendship was, eh, “sound enough”, that we could justify the physical pleasure.
And y’all, that’s kind of what having sex is — it’s the limbo (or purgatory, depending on your situation) between making love and f-cking. The thing about limbo ish is it’s a lot like something being lukewarm: it’s not really one thing or another which means that it can completely blindside you, if you’re not careful (and totally honest with yourself as well as your partner(s)).
So, if you are contemplating having sex, I really — REALLY — recommend that you figure out how you feel, what you want (outside of the act itself) and if you are prepared for what “not quites” can bring. My mother used to say that the consequences of sex don’t change just because the circumstances do — and there is some solid “wow” to that, if you really stop to think about it.
And finally, f-ck. Although most experts on the word (and yes, there are some) agree that its origin is rooted somewhere within the German language (although some say that it might’ve come from Middle English words like fyke or fike which mean “to move about restlessly” or the Norwegian word fukka which means “to copulate”), you might have also heard that it is an acronym that once stood for “Fornication Under Consent of the King”; and there is actually some data that is connected to that as well.
Legend has it that way back in the day, in order to keep reproduction rates where a particular king wanted them to be, he would instruct his residents to have sex with each other — whether they were married or not (hence, the word “fornication” being in the acronym). However, because sex outside of marriage was taken far more seriously at the time, residents had to apply for a permit to participate so that the king could determine if things like their occupation and lineage would prove to be beneficial for the kingdom overall. F-ck: no love; just necessity. And although some believe this to be more myth than fact, what is certain is it was only over time that f-ck was seen as a profane/swear/cuss word — a word that was perceived to be so offensive, in fact, that between the years 1795-1965, it didn’t even appear in dictionaries.
Personally, when I think of this four-letter word, the first thing that actually comes to my mind is animals. Take a dog being in heat, for instance. That’s basically when a female dog is ovulating and wants to have sex the most. It’s not because they are “in love” with another dog; they are simply doing what instinctively comes to them — and since animals do not reason or feel at the same capacity that humans do, although they science says that many of them do experience pleasure when they engage in their version of sexual activity, it’s not nearly as layered or even profound as what we experience.
Let’s keep going. Another reason why f-cking makes me think of animals is due to the doggy style position. Hear me out. Ain’t it wild how, most of us pretty much know that the term comes from how dogs have sex, even though most animals have sex that same way — and think about it: Doggy style doesn’t consist of making eye contact or kissing while having intercourse. It’s “hitting from behind” without much emotional energy or effort at all. Just how animals do it. And so, yeah, f-cking does seem to be more about pure animal — or in our case, mammal — instinct. I don’t need to feel anything for someone, so long as the sexual desire is there. Hmph.
Something else that I find to be interesting about f-cking is how dictionaries choose to define it. Many of them are going to provide you with two definitions: “to have sexual intercourse with” and “to treat unfairly or harshly (usually followed by over)” and that definitely makes me think of another term — casual sex and words that define casual like apathetic, careless and without serious or definite intention. So, the dictionary says that while f-cking is about having sexual intercourse — just like making love and having sex is — it goes a step further and says that it can include being treated unfairly or harshly.
And although that can make you think of assault on the surface, for sure — sometimes being treated unfairly or harshly is simply feeling like someone had sex AT you and not really WITH you; instinct (i.e., getting off) and that’s about it. Yeah, the way this puzzle is coming together, f-cking seems to be more about lust and self and not much else.
Now That You Know the Difference, What to Keep in Mind
Y’all, this is definitely the kind of topic that I could expound on until each and every cow comes home. That said, here’s hoping that I provided enough perspective on each act to close this out by encouraging you to keep the following three things to keep in mind:
1. Before you engage in copulation, be honest with yourself about what you’re ACTUALLY doing — and that your partner agrees with you. You know, they say that our brain is our biggest sex organ and honestly, breaking down the differences between making love, having sex and f-cking helps to prove that fact. I say that because, although the sex act itself is pretty much the same across the board, you and your partner’s mindset can make the experience completely different. That said, if you think that you are making love and they think y’all are just having sex — stuff can get pretty dicey. Bottom line: communicate in the bedroom before attempting to connect outside of it. It’s always worth it when you do.
2. Yes, you can feel one way and do something else. I can just about guess what some of y’all are on: Shellie, we can love our partner and still just want to f-ck. If what you are saying is you can emotionally love someone and physically lust them and want to act sometimes on the lust without really factoring in the love — yes, I agree. Doggy style continues to be a favorite sex position for people, in general, and I’m more than confident that many of the participants polled are in a serious relationship. However, having lust-filled sex with someone who you know loves you is vastly different than doing it with someone who you have no clue what they think about you or you barely know at all. Y’all, please just make sure that you know…what you should know. Sex is too amazing to have a lot of regret after it.
3. Have realistic expectations about sex. Listen, so much of my life consists of writing and talking about sex that I will be the first one to say that it deserves a ton of props for what it is able to do, in a wonderful way, for people mentally, emotionally and physically. Yet again, I’m not a fan of “make love” because something that feels really good doesn’t always mean that it is good for you. Meaning, you’ve got to be real about what sex with someone will do to your mind and spirit — not just what it will do for your body. An author by the name of Gabriel García Márquez once said, “Sex is the consolation you have when you can't have love.” For no one, should this be a constant norm. Feel me? I hope you do.
____
One act. Three very different experiences.
It’s kind of wild that sex has the ability to create that — and yet, clearly, it does.
Please just make sure that you know which experience you’re signing up for.
So that you’re having sex (you know, in general) instead of sex having you. Real talk.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Giphy