When it comes to pretty much any topic, it’s gonna be hella rare when most people are on the exact same page. If there is an immediate exception that comes to mind, personally, I can’t think of anyone who doesn’t want skin that is as flawless as possible. And if we want to achieve that, for most of us, it’s not just gonna happen out of nowhere; we’ve got to be intentional…there has to be a plan.
A part of that plan should consist of doing what we can to get our pores — the small openings that house our hair follicles, sebum, and sweat — to be as healthy and minimized as possible. Once you’ve got that on lock, branch out from there.
This article is going to set out to help you do both: nurture your pores and then give your skin, overall, what it needs. If you’re consistent, you should end up with the kind of skin that you get complimented on, consistently so, no matter what you have on or what season of the year that it is.
1. Get Professional Facials (Twice a Year)
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Even though I have a pretty good skincare routine happening at home, I do make sure to go the extra mile and get a professional facial on my face and on my back (at least) twice a year. Professional (professional is key) ones are great because aestheticians are professionally trained in treating your skin. And so, if you’re looking to detox your pores (or make them appear smaller), reduce sebum, tighten your skin, fade dark spots, and/or even out your skin tone or get your skin’s pH levels to where they need to be, a professional facial can help to make that happen.
Since I’ve been treating my back to them, it’s done wonders for keeping the few breakouts that I would get under control. I don’t have one regret about investing in my skin this way. Not. One.
2. Keep Your Skin’s pH Levels Balanced
I’m pretty sure that, as it relates to your body, you’ve heard of “pH” before; however, do you know what the letters stand for? It’s “potential of hydrogen.” The reason it matters so much when it comes to your skin, and especially your pores, is because it speaks to how acidic your skin may or may not be. This is relevant because while the areas of your body that are more exposed, like your face and hands, are usually more alkaline, parts like your genital region are more acidic.
The range for pH is 1-14 (under 7 being acidic and above 7 being alkaline), and if you want your skin to be in its “happy place,” around 5.5 is good because it will help to keep your skin’s natural oils balanced. There are at-home strips that you can take to test your skin’s pH levels in order to keep your pH where it needs to be. Also, using gentle cleansers on your skin, applying a toner after doing so, and then moisturizing twice a day are wise moves as well.
3. Eat Foods That Are Full of Antioxidants
If you want your skin to have as little cell damage as possible, you need to take in some antioxidants on a consistent basis. At the end of the day, they are substances that help reduce signs of aging, protect your skin from damaging UV rays, reduce inflammation, stimulate the production of collagen and elastin, and help your skin feel soft and moisturized.
Although a lot of skin products contain antioxidants, if you want your skin to have a truly natural glow, it’s important to consume foods that are high in antioxidants, too. Some of those include cherries, pears, artichokes, black beans, pecans, dark leafy greens, and berries.
4. Try a Baking Soda Scrub
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If you’re someone who considers themselves to be a minimalist or you are on-10 about caring for the environment, a site that you might want to bookmark is Treehugger. Recently, I was reading an article on its platform about all of the ways that baking soda benefits skin and hair, and it reminded me to give baking soda a shout-out here. As far as your skin, specifically, is concerned, baking soda helps to tighten your pores and reduce inflammation (it’s one of the best overnight remedies for pimples on the planet!). It also helps to soothe your skin after you shave, lighten the appearance of your armpits and it can also help to brighten up your complexion.
Another major perk about baking soda is that its properties are pretty good at killing the kind of bacteria that can lead to yeast infections and fungal infections overall. So, if you don’t have a box of good old-fashioned baking soda in your house, now you’ve got some really solid reasons to.
5. Do Chemical Peels
The main reason why I wrote “I've Been Doing At-Home Chemical Peels. Here Are The Pros And Cons.” for the platform last fall is because, when I was in the process of looking for a product that would help to soften the texture of my skin, I experimented with a company called Perfect Image that provides at-home chemical peel solutions in different concentrations of potency and I was really pleased with the results.
Whether you’re looking to get rid of the sebum that’s clogging and/or stretching your pores, reduce skin inflammation, soften the appearance of wrinkles and fine lines, help to even out hyperpigmentation, and/or simply keep your skin from appearing dull, a chemical peel can handle all-a-dat.
You can get a professional one; however, like I said, there are companies that sell the kind that you can use at home with different strengths that you can “build up” over time. Either way, chemical peels (when you use them as directed or advised) are great at helping to cultivate radiant-looking skin.
6. Exfoliate. Don’t Overdo It, Though.
Probably, one of the quickest ways to give your skin a healthy glow is to exfoliate it, which is all about removing the surface layer of dead skin cells (and whatever other “stuff” is lying on top of your skin) and cleansing out your pores. For instance, if you’re someone who struggles with sebum plugs (like on your nose or chin), exfoliating your skin can help to remove them. Or, if you deal with body acne, a dry brush can help with that, too.
The key to getting the most out of exfoliating is to not overdo it (1-2 times a week is good), and to use a gentle exfoliant (a DIY brown sugar scrub, a facial scrub, or a pair of exfoliating gloves for your body are ideal) and to follow it up with a (preferably) water-based moisturizer so that your skin is both soothed as well as protected once you’re done.
7. Use Plant Oils Daily
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Oftentimes, whenever, the topic of plant-based oils comes up, it’s in the context of using ones like olive, peanut, and sunflower for cooking purposes. However, plant-based oils are also good for your skin. For instance, grapeseed oil is filled with vitamins C and E; C can help to boost collagen production in your skin, while E can help to heal any blemishes or scars that you might have.
Avocado oil helps to reduce aging signs and soothe inflammation that is caused by acne, eczema, and psoriasis, and it deeply nourishes your skin. Rosehip oil is a natural exfoliant that also helps to protect your skin from damaging UV rays as it reduces hyperpigmentation and softens the appearance of fine lines and aging.
Personally, I’ve been using plant-based oils for several years now, and I definitely can cosign on the fact that they have done wonders for my skin from scalp to foot (especially plum oil; check out “Plum Oil Is The Oil You Should Ease Into The Fall Season With”).
8. Treat Yourself to an Ice Roller
Something that I actually haven’t tried before is an ice roller. I know a few folks who are huge fans of it, though. When you stop and think about the fact that even cold water helps to close your pores and tighten your skin, it would make sense since rubbing ice on your face would take those benefits to an even higher level. In fact, if you’re looking for a relatively simple way to reduce puffiness and detox your skin, applying an ice roller can help to make that happen. Harper's BAZAAR has a list of some of the best ones on the market right here.
9. Apply a Combination of Geranium and Rosemary Oil (at Night)
I will say that some skincare experts advise that if you have acne-prone skin, face serums instead of face oils are probably better for you. That said, if you want to deeply nourish your skin while you sleep, so that it’s able to thoroughly rejuvenate itself, applying a face oil can make that happen. A combination that you might want to try consists of geranium essential oil and rosemary oil.
Geranium is bomb because it’s loaded with anti-inflammatory properties that can help to treat breakouts overnight; plus, it offers some all-natural estrogen-boosting benefits from an aromatherapy standpoint if you notice that your skin is shifting a bit due to perimenopause or menopause.
Rosemary oil and I are always gonna be tight because it contains properties that increase blood circulation, fight off acne-causing bacteria, and soften the skin while evening out its tone.
10. Never Underestimate Pimple Patches
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Something that I used to think was a complete fluke is pimple patches — that is, until I tried them for myself. When it comes to blind pimples, I’ll be honest and say that even the pimple patch brands that say they will help with them…they don’t seem to do much (blind pimples are a mutha!). And when it comes to blackheads, that’s not really what they’re made for.
However, if you’ve got a whitehead (or almost whitehead) or a zit that seems to be full of pus and you want to drain that bad boy while avoiding as much skin damage as possible, pimple patches are gonna change ya life! I have applied them countless times (Hero. is the brand that I use, by the way) on period pimples before turning in and have awakened to flattened zits and a patch that is white (thanks to the hydrocolloid that the patches are made of; not the gunk that is in my pimples).
Clearing a pore quickly can happen with a pimple patch — and a cleared pore puts you on the path to the skin that you’ve always wanted, y’all!
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So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.
In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.
In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.
And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.
We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.
So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.
That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.
This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
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It’s not like it has to be a bad thing. In fact, studies say that somewhere around 15 percent of engaged couples actually met through a friend. All I’m saying is, before you entertain someone’s “I’ve got someone I want you to meet” invitation, it would benefit you to interview them first — for the sake of all parties involved.
The questions that I recommend asking? The following six are what I think can get everyone on the same page, so that there is more pleasure than regret from the hook-up attempt.
1. Why Are They So Invested?
GiphyTwo things that I recently watched over again are the series Survivor’s Remorse (the writing is so damn good) and a movie called Trapped in Temptation (both are currently on Tubi). Something that both of them made me think about is the fact that motive reveals a lot when it comes to why people say and do the things that they do.
When it comes to the movie, specifically, without giving the film away — let me just say that, if you are in a relationship, be really careful about listening to individuals who try to talk you out of maintaining it. More times than not, the motive is shady as hell. And honestly, sometimes people who are close to obsessed with you being in one deserve a bit of side-eye too.
Now, if it’s someone who loves all things love, they are in love and they want you to experience something similar — that’s sweet. Just make sure that they are approaching the set up from a healthy space. What I mean by that is they don’t see singleness as some sort of relational handicap or they aren’t trying to override what you want for your life as if they somehow know better (there are so many ways to be a control freak, y’all).
Hmph. Now that I think about it — make sure that the set-up crew isn’t trying to use you to “save” some male friend or relative of theirs. I say that because I once knew a mother whose son had — count ‘em — 10 kids and she was FOREVER trying to get me to date him. Girl, that wasn’t for me. She was looking for a Holy Ghost Jr. for that child of hers. I’ll pass. HARD PASS.
Bottom line with this one — if someone wants to set you up with someone else, the first thing to ask is why? Make sure to really listen to what their answer is. Then pay attention to if your mind, body and spirit are at peace with their answer(s).
2. Do They Know What You Want?
GiphyI don’t know about y’all, but the people (and let’s be honest, by far, it’s usually women) who have tried to set me up with someone? They didn’t even know what my preferences or type was. Hell, they didn’t even know my thoughts or timeline as it relates to being in a serious relationship were either. And what that boils down to is they were trying to hook me up based on their agenda, not mine — and that usually meant that the guys who they came up with? Yeah…I was good on them. LOL.
Yeah, if someone wants to hook you up, you definitely should ask them if they know what you are looking for in a guy when it comes to his looks, personality, passions, spirituality, relational desires and goals, location, etc. Because, indeed, what is the point in going out with someone who is fine as hell and yet, you want kids and he doesn’t (or vice versa) or who has a great personality yet he isn’t even in the same ballpark of your spiritual beliefs?
If your friend really wants to help you out, valuing your time should come with that — and that means bringing someone into your life who complements your lifestyle. No wiggle room here.
3. Are They Aware of Your Deal-Breakers?
GiphyLast year, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, “Should Bad Sex Actually Be A Relationship Deal-Breaker?” The thing that I think needs to go on record about deal-breakers is they aren’t exactly standards that you have. No, a deal-breaker is something that can’t be worked out even after trying to negotiate or compromise. When it comes to relationships, a deal-breaker might be how long two people should date before becoming exclusive or getting engaged. Another deal-breaker might be if being religious is more important than being spiritual and how that manifests itself (church or no church, etc.). And yes, another deal-breaker may be what each other’s sexual needs and expectations are.
When someone is setting you up, it is imperative that they know about your standards. For instance, for me, I am not interested in dating a divorced person, pretty much ever (I Corinthians 7:10-11). I’ve had friends who have tried to hook me up with that demographic before and it has always been a moot effort. The fact that some of them have gotten frustrated with my convictions has absolutely nothing to do with me. Some have tried to get me to compromise my deal-breakers too — like a long-distance relationship. Is it a firm “naw”? No. However, it’s not really something that I am interested in, so why not just…recommend someone local?
Yeah, if someone thinks that they know you well enough to hook you up, they absolutely should be well-versed in what your deal-breakers are before they do. And if they’ve never asked, all they are doing is assuming — and we know what that typically means. LOL.
4. What Is Their Track Record?
GiphyIt’s kind of wild that we now live in a time when more couples meet online than they do through “old-fashioned ways” like via their friends (although some reports say that Gen Z is getting back to that) — and yet, here we are. Still, if you are willing to let someone play pseudo matchmaker in your life, you are well within your rights to inquire about their track record in that department. Have they hooked others up, successfully, before? Has any of their “Cupid work” caused both people to get exactly what they wanted out of the situation? If/when things went awry, why was that?
I know someone who is constantly trying to hook people up. Thing is, maybe 10-15 percent (no joke) of their efforts have proven to be positive and fruitful — and we’re talking about close to close to two decades of them doing it. Listen, time is too precious to be out here doing stuff ONLY to please other people. That said, if someone wants you to devote some time to one of their grand ideas, you are well within your rights to ask about their past and current success score when it comes to it.
5. Can They Keep Their Own Feelings Out of It?
GiphyWanna know if someone who is offering to do something for you is actually doing it more for themselves? If they try to make it be about them when things don’t go the way they would like, that is a dead ringer. An example? They post a message about you on social media and then question you about why you didn’t do the same thing in return. Another example? They do something for you and then throw it in your face during an argument. Still another example? They set you up with someone, it doesn’t work out, and suddenly you’ve put them in a weird spot. No dear — you put your own self in that position by trying to hook two people up in the first place.
I promise you, it will spare everyone unnecessary energy spent (or even drama experienced) if, before you agree to be hooked up, you get the matchmaker on record stating that they will keep their emotions out of it as much as possible. MEANING — they will do the introductions and then let the chips fall where they may. If they can’t do this, my two cents (save it or spend it) would be to decline the offer. Because all you need is someone texting you about why you haven’t called their cousin back or having an attitude with you when you break up with some guy at their church who they thought was the perfect catch (P.S. These aren’t hypothetical examples — LOL).
6. Will They Respect Your Boundaries? Start to Finish?
GiphyYeah, this final one is a biggie. Just because someone sets you up with another person, that doesn’t automatically or necessarily mean that they should have the right to the details of the dynamic. I don’t care if it’s the first date or the 10th date. I don’t care if you decide to just be sex buddies or to have a full-blown relationship. I don’t care if you stay together or break-up — it’s your relationship which makes it your business. Whatever you share is privileged data.
Yeah, I would say that probably the most challenging thing about being hooked up by someone you know is they have a tendency to think that they are a part of the relationship too — and that is a lie. If things go well beyond a couple of dates, you and the guy should discuss what you will both share with the person who introduced you and then agree to stick to that boundary, no matter what. It’s a great way to protect the dynamic, to keep “outside voices” from influencing the growth and to navigate how you want to move, moving forward.
Someone who hooked you up for the right reasons and knows how to honor limits? They will understand. Will they ask questions? Absolutely. Will they pry? Nah.
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Should you sit and let someone hook you up? I mean, you never know how your blessing will come. Just make sure that they are prepared for you to do some digging into their mindset before they start sweetly meddling into your love life.
It’s only fair. Hell, and right. LOL.
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