Your Back Is Sick Of Being Neglected...So Read This.
Man, if I could track down the Black woman’s back that I saw about a month ago on somebody’s social media platform, just so you could see what (partially) inspired me to pen this piece, I promise you that I would. Between how toned she was and her completely flawless skin, it reminded me of a conversation that some people and I semi-recently had about one of the most unsung sexiest parts of the male and female body: the back.
I’m not proud of it; “it” being the fact that it really wasn’t until I got into my 40s that I even started to care about my back and its needs — on any level, really. However, now that I am more aware and far more grateful for it, I have become more intentional. And that has, as a direct result, caused me to feel more comfortable and confident in wearing certain items that reveal more of my back than I used to back in the day.
You know, it really is kinda wild that, even though many of us take great measures to keep our butt looking great, it’s like we totally overlook the fact that it’s hard for folks to notice it without seeing our back in the process. So, for cosmetic and health-related reasons, if you know that you’ve been neglecting that part of you, here are 15 things that you can do to bring some (more) sexiness (and comfortability) to that particular area of your body.
Starting and ending with two Black sistahs who can serve as some firsthand inspiration and motivation. #SALUTE
@shygirlfit We not skipping back day 🦾💚 #fittok #blackgirlworkouts #backdayworkouts #fyp
1. Invest in a Back Washer and a Back Roller
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If any of you are considering taking a yoga class (or staying in one), let back care be a huge motivator. Boy, no matter how often I am told that I don’t look my age, if there’s one thing that will confirm that I’ve earned each and every year, it’s my decline in flexibility — and yes, that makes giving my back the kind of thorough skincare that it needs pretty challenging.
Something that has helped immensely is investing in tools that are specifically designed to reach my back. One is an exfoliating back washer (like this one here), and the other is a back roller that’s designed to apply different skin products (like this one here). Both have made the previous stress and strain of trying to reach all areas of my back a total thing of the past. Both are also some of the best self-care decisions that I have ever made.
2. Apply Oil-Free Products
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You’ve probably heard before that pimples are (typically) the result of an overproduction of sebum (an oily substance that your glands naturally produce in order to keep your skin moisturized) that will sometimes mix with bacteria and dead skin cells and clog up your pores. Since it can be somewhat easy to neglect your back, this is where the term “bacne” — back acne — comes from. If you naturally have oily skin or you don’t want to add to the sebum issue on your back, try and go with skincare products that are either oil-free or water-based. Byrdie has a list of oil-free washes here. Allure has a list of water-based moisturizers here.
3. Try Some Pimple Patches
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I can’t believe at my age that I’m still dealing with period pimples (check out “7 Natural Remedies For Hormonal Acne”), yet…here we are. And although I will be the first one to say that I was skeptical about pimple patches, if you’ve got a whitehead or a bump that seems to be full of pus or water, those suckers really do work (Mighty Patch is the brand that I personally use). They really will suck the gunk out, and you really will see a cloudy circle on your patch where the hydrocolloid has turned it all into a gel-like substance so that you see less inflammation and you’re less tempted to pick.
I’m saying all of this to say that if you’ve got a hot date coming up and there’s a zit on your back that you need to dissolve ASAP, so long as it’s not a blind pimple, a pimple patch (if you leave it on for 6-8 hours or so) can do wonders! No joke.
4. And/Or Some Salicylic Acid Pads
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While we’re on the topic, something else that can help with not only pimples but callouses, corns, dandruff, and even psoriasis is salicylic acid. It’s a type of acid that’s designed to exfoliate the skin pretty effectively. As a bonus, it contains anti-inflammatory properties, too. Something that I really like about salicylic acid is it not only works at clearing up breakouts faster, it can also help to keep them from forming in the first place.
So, you definitely should have some of these skin pads in your arsenal — for your back, your face, and that corn that may be on one of your pinky toes (just sayin’).
5. Consider a Chemical Peel for Any Post-Inflammatory Hyperpigmentation (PIH)
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I’ve been doing at-home chemical peels for a hot minute now. I’ll be sharing my experience with them in another piece. For now, what I will say is learning that there is a significant difference between actual acne scars and what is known in the expert skincare world as post-inflammatory hyperpigmentation has been a real game-changer for me.
Long story short, while an acne scar tends to do long-term damage to your skin (sometimes to the point where only a dermatologist can help), post-inflammatory hyperpigmentation is the dark spots that are oftentimes left behind once a pimple goes away. Once I learned this, the approach to my skin has been a bit different — and yes, chemical peels have become a big part of that. That’s because, now that I know that I’m looking to even my skin tone and not actually alter the structure of my skin, chemical peels have helped to accomplish my actual goal, not just on my back but anywhere a dark spot (usually from a pimple) pops up.
I can’t speak for every company; however, I will tell you who I’ve been rolling with: it’s called Perfect Image. They’ve got peels at different concentration levels (start at 10 percent and build up; 30 and especially 50 percent are where the big kids play), their products are affordable, and I’ve seen some real changes in the appearance of my skin since I’ve been using them. Anyway, just something else to keep in mind if you want a clear-looking back…including when it comes to the evenness of its complexion.
6. Make Sure Your Bras Fit
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Although it continues to be somewhat of a debatable topic, there is more and more data that is being released about the fact that, on some levels, it can actually be more beneficial to go without wearing a bra (and most certainly without wearing one all of the time). Still, if you’re someone who prefers the extra lift that they provide, please make sure that your bras fit well. It’s a fair thing to mention since it still appears to be that almost 80 percent of women are continuing to wear the wrong size (women are also keeping bras for too long; you should be getting 4-6 new ones on an ANNUAL basis).
Why does this matter when it comes to your back? Well, remember the zits that I need pimple patches for? Usually, they come from either my bra straps or the back parts of my bra — and the more that your bra is digging into your skin, the more likely those pores are going to clog up and wreak total havoc on your skin.
7. Get a “Back Facial” Once a Season
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Even with all of the things that you can do at home to keep your back looking lovely, nothing beats the support of a professional aesthetician. My waxer happens to be a licensed one, and when I shared with her some of my personal back concerns, she recommended that I get a professional back facial once a season (four times a year) — and it has made all of the difference in the world. She exfoliates, removes blackheads, applies a chemical peel, massages, and deeply moisturizes it. I can always see and feel the difference, for weeks later, after getting a back facial. It’s always been a wise move.
8. Watch Your Hair
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The sebum that comes from your scalp is designed to trickle down your hair shaft; that way, your hair is able to remain soft and moisturized. Due to the super curly texture that a lot of us have, oftentimes, we have to replenish the moisture that our strands do not receive by applying a variety of hair products. Well, when you wear your hair down (and it’s got some length to it), all of that stuff on your strands can get onto your back and start to clog up your pores.
Not only that, but if you wear long extensions (including braids or twists that require extensions), the friction from the hair can irritate the skin that’s on your back as well. That’s why you should try to wear your hair up as much as you do down and definitely give your back some extra TLC on the “wear it down” days — just to be on the safe side.
9. Get Some Dumbbells
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Now that we’ve got a lot of cosmetic points about your back out of the way, let’s talk about why I started and ended this article off with a video of a Black woman whose back is truly sexy AF. Y’all, there is no way around the fact that a huge part of what makes their backs look the way that they do is that they partake in a regular and consistent exercise routine. And the reason why getting some dumbbells to work out with is a good idea is that they are a convenient form of exercise equipment that can help you to strengthen your heart, further develop your balance and coordination, gain muscle, and lose weight. So, if you want to tone your back, cop yourself two of ‘em.
As far as what size/weight to get, Women’s Health has an article that can guide you here. And when it comes to the kind of exercises that you should do with your dumbbells that will help you to target your back, even from the comfort and convenience of your own home, I found some helpful YouTube videos (that feature women) here, here, and here.
10. Focus on Your Core
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People who have a six-pack don’t just look great in a bathing suit; they are also doing certain exercises that support their lower back. I know this because working on your abs means that you’re strengthening the core of your body — and that always helps your spine to remain nice and strong. I found a brotha on YouTube who has a beginner’s video for working on ab muscles; you can check it out here.
11. Master a Few Different Yoga Positions
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You can read articles on our site like “The Unexpected Lessons Yoga Taught Me About Life,” “5 Best Yoga Poses For An Emotional Release,” “I Took A Yoga Class & Proved To Myself That Yoga Is For Plus-Sized Women Too,” “The 5 Yoga Poses That Will Improve Your Sex Life,” and “7 Yoga Stretches To Relieve Your Lower Back Tension” to get a feel for how much of a yoga fan that we are in this space.
Well, when it comes to your back, specifically, yoga reduces tension, increases flexibility, tones, improves breathing, and strengthens your core. Positions that will help to accomplish all of this? The Cobra. The Cat-Cow. The Bridge. The Half Lord of the Fishes. And the always popular Downward-Facing Dog.
12. Avoid Inflammatory Foods
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I recently read an article that said, “All processed foods can cause inflammation.” And while all inflammation is not bad, when it’s at excessive levels, it can contribute to all sorts of health issues, including diabetes, obesity, and depression. Inflammation can also lead to back discomfort. That’s why it’s important to exercise, be super picky about what mattress you choose, and pay attention to your diet because there are certain foods that will trigger more inflammation in your system than you need.
Some of those include “white foods” like white rice, pasta, and bread, an excessive amount of red meat, sugary foods, soda, and (a certain amount of) dairy.
13. Take a Glucosamine Supplement
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Something that tends to fade over time (meaning, as we age) is cartilage. Since it’s the type of elastic tissue that supports our joints and our spine, this is definitely something that we should proactively care about. A supplement that can assist in this area is glucosamine. If you’ve never heard of it before, it’s a substance that’s a natural building block for the cartilage that is already in your system.
Since it can also help with reducing inflammation, treating glaucoma, and even helping to relieve the symptoms that are directly associated with irritable bowel syndrome (IBS), you should discuss with your doctor if it’s something that you should add to your healthcare regimen. It could be just what your back has been looking/waiting for.
14. Keep Your Sheets Clean
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You would think that this one would go without saying, yet after reading an article that said that people, on average, only change their bed sheets every three weeks or so (what in the world?!) — listen, you shed way too many dead skin cells and sweat (and possibly have sex) too much throughout the night to not be putting new bedding down on a weekly basis — not just for obvious hygienic reasons but to keep your skin great-looking too.
While we’re on the topic, make sure that you wash with the kind of detergent that is gentle on your skin. Some people are so busy looking for something that smells spring fresh all week long that they don’t realize it’s the direct cause of their itchy and irritated skin.
15. Sleep “Right”
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Posture is always gonna be important. Full stop. Yet if a part of the reason why it’s hard for you to keep your back the way it’s supposed to be is that you’ve got lower back discomfort going on, it could be due to the fact that you’re not sleeping in a way that best supports that particular part of your body.
If you want to “align your spine,” many health experts say that it’s best to sleep on your back, sleep on your side with a pillow in between your knees, or get into the ever-so-comfortable fetal position. If you apply this gem (along with the other back-themed tips), you and your back will be walking more in agreement than ever. Pardon the pun but…straight up. #wink
@kerendesir sexyback no JT #backgainz #gymtiktok #gymgirlsoftiktok #blackgirlfitness #foryoupage #fyp #doritosduetroulette #upperbodyworkout #blackwomentiktok #girlswholift #musclemommy
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Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next June (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at missnosipho@gmail.com. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Navigating Dating When Emotionally Unavailable & Detached: My Journey Back To Feeling
The last time I came with a dating story, I told you I got my little feelings hurt in 2021. I called myself trying to be out in these streets entertaining a man in a different area code, city, and state — only for homeboy to play in my damn face. So, I went and gave y’all "8 Rules To Casual Dating Every Woman Should Know This Summer." You’re welcome. Fast forward to 2024, and I am now coming to you from a more mature and intentional place. We’re not in summer yet, but I truly believe what blooms in spring, thrives in summer.
2023 was my year, and it was my turn. I had just completed an 8-month holistic detox. The glow-up was real and well-deserved. The way I have poured into myself is unmatched. Let me tell you, self-love is a love you have never known. After a five-year healing journey, I finally felt like myself again, and I was ready to play. My heart was open, my mind was clear, and my body hella transformed. I had told all my friends that I was ready to explore dating again, and at the height of summer, I did exactly just that.
This time I decided I wanted to take my time. I wanted to date the “right way” or the “healthy way.” You know, keep your options open, ask the right questions, believe actions and not words, observe patterns and pay attention to red, yellow, and green flags. I was never the dating app type of girl. I sincerely miss everything about human connection and dating from 2000 to 2012. Can we please bring all of that back into 2024? I prefer to feel a man’s energy and presence in real-time. Nonetheless, I still chose to dabble with a few dating apps. I was all the way outside and dating for practice.
Unfortunately, with today’s dating culture, social climate, and how some of these men move and/or behave, these dates were a dead end. Not one guy made it to my roster. What these men were was benched this season – not one of them could be my first-round select draft pick. It didn't seem like anyone I met was interested in a serious relationship. And it’s completely fine. Miss me with the ghosting, lack of effort, inconsistency, and poor communication. I continued to just do me because what is for me will not miss me.
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The universe must have heard me talking because I had specifically told my closest girlfriends that I wanted to meet someone who lived in the vicinity, no more than twenty minutes away, and no more long distance. And I did meet him (it’s crazy how I manifest exactly what I want). As we started to get to know each other, I liked his energy and effort. I liked the direction it seemed to be going to the point my girlfriends had to tell me not to run from him. Because every part of me wanted to run from something that seemed normal.
I liked what he was coming with until I became uncomfortable with my own feelings, and I didn’t know how to communicate them to him.
With that said, I knew if I truly wanted to experience the truest of loves, a reciprocal, requited love, and be in a healthy relationship this story had to come to a pause. What I didn’t know was that he was going to show me things I didn’t know I needed to work on. I didn’t know he inadvertently was going to help me continue to heal parts of me that were hidden.
As someone who has learned to self-heal, I am no longer the type that runs from herself. I am here for the growth.
The truth is I am emotionally detached from myself, and I am not actively dating at the moment. I am the one that has to work on herself. My reiki healer called it, too – she told me this year would not be a year for a relationship, but a year of continuous growth. And now I see why. After all the healing work I have done thus far – I am an unemotional mess. How?
At my big age of 39, I struggle to communicate my wants and needs.
I still struggle to communicate and process uncomfortable feelings. I would rather give myself anxiety, act nonchalantly, emotionally react, and choose non-communication when I am bothered with someone than address the issue (I will later explain why). I have been ignoring my feelings for so long it has become a habit, a defense mechanism, and more so a trauma response.
If you are someone like me who grew up in a household that didn’t discuss feelings, your emotional needs were unmet, and you don’t feel safe to share your feelings – emotional detachment is quite common.
Oftentimes, we always talk about men being emotionally unavailable, but what if it’s a woman who is emotionally unavailable or emotionally detached? How does she navigate herself, dating, or being in a relationship? As I navigate my emotions this season, let’s explore what it means to be emotionally detached, the signs of detachment, and how to reconnect with yourself emotionally.
Emotional Unavailability vs. Emotional Detachment
When we look at the terminology emotional unavailability and emotional detachment, one might argue that the two terms are interchangeable and have the same meaning. One could also argue that both terms mean that some people are not in tune with their emotions or lack the emotional capacity to be responsive to someone else’s emotions. Fair enough. However, there is a big difference. The definition of emotional unavailability is described as people who have difficulty with sharing their emotions and being receptive to the emotions of those around them.
According to Verywell Mind, signs of emotional unavailability can look like being distant or cold, lack of closeness, and emotional intimacy in relationships, inability to understand and relate to others’ feelings, defensiveness when asked to change or let others in, tendency to shut down or avoid topics that require emotional openness, or withdrawal from people or situations that provoke emotional reactions.
Whereas emotional detachment is defined as the inability to or willingness to connect with others on an emotional level. Furthermore, Psychology Today states emotional detachment can also mean that people do not engage with their feelings. Exhibit A – me. Emotional detachment has various causes – past neglect, childhood or adult trauma, PTSD, depression, personality disorder, bipolar disorder, substance abuse, or, in some cases, medication (i.e. antidepressants). It is important to note emotional detachment is a complex issue. For someone like me, it’s a coping mechanism.
It is easier for me to ignore uncomfortable feelings to protect myself from stress or getting hurt. Hence, my nonchalant demeanor. It is also true for some people it is a reaction to trauma, abuse, and unprocessed emotions. Exhibit B – me. As it is difficult for me to open up about my feelings at the moment. On the contrary – emotional detachment can be helpful in navigating some situations like listening to people’s opinions and gossip.
Unfortunately, emotional detachment is not a behavior that can be turned on and off at will. Please note that emotional detachment is NOT a mental health diagnosis but can be a symptom of a mental health condition such as an attachment disorder. And if you know anything about attachment theory, it is related to the relationship we develop in our childhood with our primary caregivers.
Signs You're Emotionally Detached
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According to Psychology Today and Verywell Mind, general signs of emotional detachment can look like difficulty showing empathy to others, sharing emotions, committing to a relationship, feeling numb, poor listening skills, lack of self-esteem, preferring to be alone, struggling to feel positive emotions, inability to identify emotions, lack of physical, verbal, or sexual contact and losing touch with people or maintaining connections.
In a romantic relationship, emotional detachment shows up as you or your partner not being available for connection, poor communication, or reduced affection.
For me, my experience with emotional detachment is collective. I am an empath to my core. I don’t have a problem relating to other’s feelings or circumstances. I don’t have commitment issues, nor do I have an issue connecting with others or maintaining those connections. I struggle with sharing emotions, at least the negative ones.
Due to the emotional abuse from my childhood and a toxic relationship, I learned sharing emotions just wasn't the safe thing to do. As a survivor of trauma, I learned to suppress feeling negative emotions in general as a form of protection.
How To Reconnect To Your Emotions When You're Emotionally Unavailable
Serious Kid Cudi GIF by Apple MusicGiphyExploring my emotional side in-depth started late last year simply by noticing my reaction to something that he did. I didn’t know how to properly communicate to him how I was feeling or what he did bothered me in the moment. So, I swallowed my feelings and said absolutely nothing. I intentionally chose to avoid the issue. I chose to rationalize the situation instead of acknowledging that my feelings at the time were valid. I chose to act like everything was all good because it was all good.
“It wasn’t that deep to begin with” is what I told myself. And this is where the problem lies.
The saying is true, “What happens in your childhood shows up in your adult relationships.” I came to realize that because I was not able to express my feelings as a child, I struggled to process them. I either hold back my feelings, take a long time to say how I feel, or don’t say anything at all. This is because I fear people will walk away from me like my mother did if I share what I truly feel. I fear my feelings won’t be validated, or they will be rejected.
With that said, I was completely unaware that I was emotionally detached from myself until recently. So, here we are with this article. It all started by reading Instagram’s @theholisticpsychologist, Dr. Nicole LePera’s newest book How to Be the Love You Seek: Break Cycles, Find Peace, and Heal Your Relationships, which was released on November 28, 2023. As I read through the first chapter, I became triggered.
How Dr. LePera describes her childhood with her parents and experiences with her romantic partners somewhat mirrored my experiences with my own parents and relationships. As Dr. LaPera stated in her book, I have no issue showing up for others or meeting their needs and wants. But when it comes to expressing my own needs and wants – I cannot or I don’t. This is mainly due to my hyper-independence.
At an early age, I learned to show up for myself because the people I trusted to show up for me failed. Given my home environment, I had internalized it is not safe to talk about feelings. I never knew my emotional responses and behavior were abnormal. But because I am willing to continue to do my inner work, I know that I can reconnect to my emotions, and undo four decades of repressed emotions.
If you are someone like me who struggles with emotional connection with yourself and others, here is how you go about it:
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1. Know Your Attachment Style
For me, the first step was to understand my attachment style. I asked my therapist if she could help me identify my attachment style to understand my triggers. She recommended The Attachment Theory Workbook by Annie Chen, LMFT. My therapist administered the associated online quiz – Attachment Quiz. If you haven’t figured out my attachment style yet by reading this article, I have an anxious attachment style.
This means I don’t do well with inconsistent behavior, especially from men (but I’m the type that holds men to standards too). People with an anxious attachment style have a need to feel close to their partner. It may come across as “clingy” or “needy.” However, this same need is often driven by fear of abandonment, mistrust, and low self-esteem. I would say knowing your attachment style is helpful because you can work towards having a secure attachment style (with practice) in your relationships – familial, business, work, platonic, or romantic.
2. Become Self-Aware
Most people who are not in the practice of self-care or self-healing are unaware of their triggers, patterns, and behaviors. We are so caught up in the daily minutiae of life that we forget to pay attention to the most important part of our days — ourselves. As Dr. LePera says, make it a conscious habit to pause throughout your day to check in with yourself. Ask yourself:
- How does my body feel?
- What am I doing right now?
- Am I present?
- Am I distracted and lost with other thoughts?
- What do I think or feel when I recall a specific experience with someone?
- What do I think or worry about?
- What would happen if I shared my authentic thoughts, perspective, feelings right now?”
This is what Dr. LePera refers to as exploring your embodied self or fulfilling your authentic needs in chapter two of her book. Consistent mindfulness and self-awareness are key to self-discovery and in any healing journey. Learning to focus on the present moment also includes paying attention to our emotional response to an event or how we think about emotions in general.
3. Practice Vulnerability
The idea of vulnerability is a tough one for me and so many other women for countless reasons. Whether it be toxic family, friendships, relationships, or trauma – trusting others with your thoughts and feelings is not easy. As much as I am open and transparent, I am not as vulnerable. And I believe there is so much power in the duality to be both. To trust someone, let alone a man with your authentic self is a delicate matter.
But it is emotional vulnerability that allows us humans to build authentic connections, create stronger relationships, and break down emotional walls. Emotional vulnerability is not something to be rushed – it takes time and practice from you and the people you choose to have in your life. Medical News Today suggests that we can learn to be vulnerable by opening up more to our closest friends, building our ability to become more trusting, and developing skills to regulate our emotions.
4. Seek Therapy
I have been in therapy for six years and counting. I would consider therapy one of my safe spaces. I am one of those individuals who recommend therapy to everyone as it has given me the tools and resources I need to navigate my life challenges. By choosing to get help, I was able to put my PTSD and depression in remission for four years now. I have also learned how to manage my anxiety.
I am fully aware that in this season of my life requires me to do the work to unlock new levels of self. And any time where I have consciously chosen growth – the universe or life has not failed me. I was able to heal my body, my heart, and my spirit. Now, it’s time to heal my inner child, this hurt little girl who lives in me.
I will say choosing a therapist is similar to dating; you might go through a few potentials until you find a therapist you connect with. Actually, one of my lifelong friends said to me the other day, “Your relationship with your therapist is one of the most important relationships in your life.” I needed her to say that, and I needed to hear it because it’s true. You are essentially trusting a licensed stranger to help you navigate your life on so many levels.
Be picky and ask the questions. Cut the cord at the first red flag given. Again, let me reiterate that emotional detachment is not a mental health diagnosis. It can be treated with the help of a therapist. Emotional detachment only becomes a problem when it starts to interfere with your daily life. Pay attention to changes in your daily behavior and make decisions to cope accordingly.
I am genuinely excited about reconnecting with my emotions. I want to feel all the feels – good, bad, and indifferent. I want to cry all the tears – especially the sad ones. I want to process and release negative emotions. I want to say how I feel in the moment with no fear.
If you are that girl who struggles with emotional connection or thinks you're emotionally detached, I hope that you become willing to face your inner child and show up for her. Don’t run – she has been waiting for you.
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