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12 Natural Ways To Get Your Skin To Glow All The Way Up This Summer
If there is any time of the year when many of us are showing as much skin as possible, the summer season would have to be it. This means two things. One, we've got to make sure that our skin looks as even-toned and healthy as possible. Two, we've got to do whatever we can to protect it from the damage that spending hours out in the summer season sun can potentially bring. This article is gonna tackle both of these points.
It's interesting because, as I was thinking about what to entitle this, "glow" came to mind. I'm glad it did because one definition is "incandescent". Another is "rich and warm in coloring". Still another is "showing the radiance of health". If this is how you want your skin to look right through here, I've got 12 all-natural ways to definitely make that a possibility. Let's do this.
1. Cold(er) Showers
While standing in the shower for long periods of time might feel really good, if your ultimate goal is to retain moisture (and lower your water bill in process), opt for showers in cooler water that lasts for a longer period of time.
The reality is, that hot water zaps our skin of a lot of the moisture that it needs. Not only that but cold showers are good at energizing, increasing blood circulation, soothing itchy skin and even upping your metabolism levels.
Listen, no one is saying that the temp has to be as cold as ice. Just opt for cooler than usual. Again, your skin will thank you for it. Plus, it can actually feel really refreshing after a hot summer's day.
2. Tea Bags in Bathwater
If baths happen to be more your thing, when's the last time you dropped a few tea bags into the tub? If the answer is "never", hear me out. Black tea can help to reduce inflammation. Green tea can soothe muscle soreness. Rose tea is loaded with antioxidants. Lavender tea can relax you. Calendula tea is a natural eczema remedy. Orange blossom tea can soften your skin. And that's just for starters.
Since tea bags contain dried herbs in their most potent state, it makes perfect sense that dropping a couple of them into some warm water and then soaking in the tub for 15-20 minutes could be super therapeutic for your skin, as well as the rest of your body, right?
3. DIY Body Wash
Of course, you wanna be clean. Still, if there's something that you should strongly consider skipping out on, it's traditional soap. A lot of them contain fragrances that can trigger allergies or dry your skin out. Many also have the detergent sodium lauryl sulfate (SLS) in them which can rob your skin of its natural oils, not to mention parabens (a type or preservative) that has been linked to (breast) cancer. For all of these reasons (and more), at the very least, read the labels of the soaps and body washes that you plan on bringing them home. Even better, why not make your own body wash? It's really not as difficult as it might initially sound (I've done it many times before).
A really easy recipe consists of ½ cup of liquid castile soap (it's a really healthy skin-cleansing base that also provides the suds that you may be looking for); one-fourth cup of Aloe vera juice (it's a rich source of antioxidants that can also decrease symptoms related to psoriasis and dermatitis); one tablespoon of grapeseed oil (it's loaded with vitamins C and E to improve your skin's elasticity); one tablespoon of glycerin (it acts as a humectant which will draw moisture from the air), and 10 drops of citrus essential oil and five drops of rose essential oil (both will soften your skin). Put it all in a bottle, shake well, and use. It's healthy. It's chemical-free. And you can feel proud that you made it all on your own.
4. Exfoliating Gloves
There are a billion reasons why it's a good idea to exfoliate your skin. It sloughs off dead skin cells. It helps to unclog pores. It will draw out impurities. It can soften the appearance of scars over time. And it definitely can make your skin feel softer and smoother. While body scrubs are definitely a great way to exfoliate your skin (feel free to check out some great recipes here, here and here), on the days when you may be in a rush, wash your body with some exfoliating gloves. They get the job done and are mad convenient.
Special note, though. Because exfoliating gloves do get dead skin cells off of you and we reportedly lose somewhere between 30,000 to 40,000 every minute of the day, it's best to replace them every 4-6 weeks. The main reason is because, sometimes the cells can get trapped in the gloves which, over time, is a lot like…cleaning your kitchen counters with a dirty washcloth (if you catch my drift).
5. Herb-Infused Oil
Something that has brought me so much joy over the past several months is making my own herb-infused oil. I actually started doing it for my scalp and hair; however, I've been easing into applying it to my skin and I definitely have no regrets! The cool thing about applying herb-infused oil is it's a powerful way to get the most potent benefits of the herbs that you choose to use. And just how do you know which herbs will best suit your needs? I won't lie, it takes a minute to do your research. Thankfully, sites like Annie's Remedy can help you out. It's got a list of 400 different herbs and benefits that you can check out here.
Once you've decided on a specific herb (or combination of them) that you want to try, sites like Etsy have dried package herbs that are affordable and can be shipped directly to you (go to the site and put "dried herbs" in the search field). Then you'll need a mason jar, a favorite carrier oil (remember that coconut oil solidifies in cooler temperatures, so you might want to go with something else like sweet almond, avocado, or jojoba) and a pot to boil some water in. Then you're good to go (a video on how to infuse your herbs is located here). You can also put your herbs and oils into your jar and let them sit in a dark space for 30-45 days but — who's got time for that? Anyway, it's a lick and then some if you want your skin to glow. Definitely give it a shot. I definitely have not one regret.
6. Or Rosemary Oil
If you're looking for something that is cheaper and quicker, pick up some rosemary oil (a brand that I really like, I pick up at my local Walgreens).
As far as health benefits go, rosemary has the ability to assist when it comes to boosting brain power, relieving pain, increasing blood circulation, decreasing stress levels, soothing joint inflammation and stimulating hair growth. On the skin tip, it's awesome because, not only does it deeply hydrate your skin and, thanks to its antiseptic properties, it can make eczema-related symptoms easier to deal with, rosemary oil is also bomb because it naturally repels bugs.
The ultimate summer skin oil, if you ask me, chile.
7. Homemade Shea Butter Body Butter
When it comes to skincare — especially our skin — I don't know how you could ever go wrong with shea butter. Aside from all of the fatty acids that it contains, shea butter is oh so good for your skin because it deeply moisturizes; it helps to heal damaged skin tissue; it softens the appearance of acne marks and other scars; it speeds up the healing process of pimples; it fights off free radicals; it reduces skin inflammation and, it contains anti-aging properties too.
Sometimes, I'll simply scoop some shea butter out of its container and apply it right after getting out of the shower. Other times, I'll use it as a base for a body butter. That way, I can add some other ingredients and it's oftentimes less oily that way. Some easy recipes can be found here and here. Oh, and if you want to learn how to best formulate body butters so that they are the exact texture that you want (because there are levels to this ish), a comprehensive video is located here.
8. Witch Hazel and Peppermint Spritz
Hands down, one of the cheapest ways to benefit your skin is to cop a bottle of witch hazel, next time you're at your local grocery or drugstore. Usually for under a couple of bucks, you can get something that removes oiliness; dries out pimples (without over-drying your skin in the process); prevents razor bumps; tightens pores; helps to heal bug bites, and tones your skin in a really major way, even from the first time that you use it. If you add to the witch hazel 2-3 drops of peppermint essential oil, the oil's antiseptic and antibacterial properties will soothe irritation, reduce inflammation, and help your skin feel invigorated. I like to combine these and use them as a spritz. It's really great when I put it in the fridge overnight and take it with me when I know that I'm going to be out in the summer sun for a few hours. It pampers my skin and hydrates it too. Another great summer skin hack, if you ask me.
9. DIY Sunscreen
Listen, just because your melanin is poppin', that doesn't mean that you can't experience UV skin damage (check out Healthline's article, "The Sunscreen Gap: Do Black People Need Sunscreen?"). And here's the thing — if you choose to ignore the heads up, over time, that could lead to premature aging or worse, skin cancer. If you're down to apply sunscreen yet you want to use as few chemicals as possible, why not make your own? Wellness Mama is one site that I dig when it comes to natural remedies and DIY tips (you can check out her recipe here). Healthline has some other sunscreen recipes that you might want to peruse here.
10. Lip Gloss
What is the point in your skin looking amazing if your lips are dry, chapped and out here looking a hot mess?
Even on the days when you don't want to put a damn thing on your face, some mascara and a little bit of lip gloss can have you out here looking radiant. Shoot, you can even make your own lip gloss with the help of two teaspoons of castor oil, one teaspoon of vegetable glycerin, a drop of honey and a drop of cinnamon oil. When you're done, put the gloss in a lip gloss container (you can find them at your local arts and crafts stores or at places like Walmart) and apply.
If you want to take even more of a less-is-more approach, dab some shea butter on your lips. It'll keep them pretty and smooth too.
11. Vitamin C-Enriched Foods
Cultivating glowing skin doesn't just happen via what you do on the outside; you've gotta take care of your skin from the inside out as well. Since Vitamin C is a nutrient that is loaded with antioxidants and helps to produce collagen (which gives your skin elasticity so that it can continue to appear luminous and youthful), you definitely need to make sure that you get some of it into your system on a daily basis. Foods that are rich in Vitamin C include dark leafy greens, citrus fruits, berries, potatoes, broccoli, melons, kiwi, Brussels sprouts, cauliflower, and red and green peppers.
12. Water. Lots and Lots of Water.
We're made up of over 60 percent water so, of course, our skin needs it. Without it, our skin starts to look dull, our pores appear large and it's easier for fine lines and wrinkles to creep up. So, definitely keep a recyclable tumbler of water (even if it's sparkling or infused) with you at all times. It can help to keep your body temperature regulated, your system running smoothly and your skin glowing, naturally, all summer long!
Featured image by Getty Images
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Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next June (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at missnosipho@gmail.com. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
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This article is sponsored by Hulu.
UnPrisonedhas returned for its highly anticipated second season, delving deeper into the complex dynamics of the Alexander family.
The series premiere comes a year after its debut season garnered rave reviews from fans and critics and earned record-breaking ratings for Hulu's Onyx Collective brand. UnPrisoned's success can be attributed to its raw, relatable themes and comedic appeal.
Inspired by creator Tracy McMillan's life, the show follows Paige (Kerry Washington), a therapist and single mother whose life takes an unexpected turn when her father, Edwin (Delroy Lindo) --who was released from prison-- moves in with her and her teenage son, Finn (Faly Rakotohavana).
Throughout UnPrisoned's first season, viewers witnessed how Edwin's incarceration deeply affected Paige's life and relationships. In the series, Paige unpacks her trauma through interactions with her inner child and her online followers. Meanwhile, Edwin is overcoming specific struggles with his own past that led to his life of crime, including a dysfunctional upbringing and his mother's arrest. As the Alexanders attempt to reconcile, new challenges arise.
This new season promises to further explore their unconventional family dynamic. Here are several compelling reasons why season two of UnPrisoned should be on everyone's watchlist.
The Alexander Family Life Is Still In Shambles
UnPrisoned's second season resumes where the series left off, with Paige grappling with the fallout from her troubled therapy practice and Edwin navigating life independently after moving out. Meanwhile, Finn faces his own challenges. The teenager is battling anxiety and seeking information about his father—a topic Paige avoids discussing.
The Alexander Family Are Attending Therapy To Resolve Their Underlying Issues
Amid the chaos in their lives, the Alexander family decides to mend their bond by confronting their past traumas. They seek professional help and attend therapy sessions with a “family radical healing coach,” played by John Stamos, a new cast member. This collective effort aims to unravel the complexities of their shared history and strengthen their relationships.
The process of unraveling each character's internal conflicts and their potential impact on future relationships may clash with Paige's textbook therapy approach. While Paige is used to being in the therapist's seat in both career and family, this forces her into the unfamiliar role of a patient during therapy sessions. This shift would compel her to look in the mirror and try a radically different approach.
The Alexander Family Learned A Big Lesson During A Therapy Session
In therapy, the Alexanders are tasked with addressing their individual traumas to salvage their remaining relationships. One of the family therapist’s eccentric suggestions was an exercise involving a family wrestling match. During this session, Paige faces tough questions about her refusal to share information about Finn's father.
While it's unclear whether this scene is reality or fantasy, the image of the family duking it out in the ring certainly makes for hilarious yet compelling television.
Paige Tries Dating Again Following Failed Relationships
Amid her life's chaos, Paige decides to step back into the dating field. However, her many attempts have left her with mixed results. The dating apps have turned out to be a fail, and an outing with her ex Mal (Marque Richardson), who is also her father's parole officer, doesn’t go quite as expected after he brings an unexpected guest – his new girlfriend.
The situation takes an awkward turn when Mal's new partner learns why the former couple split, partly due to Paige's self-sabotage.
UnPrisoned Is A Perfect Balance Of Comedy And Drama
As a dramedy, UnPrisoned takes a comedic approach to its heavy subjects. The show takes us on a ride with Paige's dating misadventures and navigating a friendship with her ex.
Other lighthearted moments include Edwin's attempts at CPR based on online videos and, of course, the antics of the Alexander family's unconventional new healing coach.
The second season of UnPrisoned is now available on Hulu.
UnPrisoned | Season 2 Trailer | Hulu
Feature image courtesy
The Common Denominator Is You. So, Why Do You Keep Choosing The Wrong Men?
Everywhere you go, there you are. It’s one of those popular sayings (kind of like “It is what it is”) that I find myself using a lot, especially when I’m in sessions with my clients. Why? Well, it’s kind of likean article that I once read that pretty much said our culture likes to play the toxic game of blaming other people because it’s an easy way to deflect from personal accountability (check out “What It Actually Means To 'Hold Yourself Accountable'”). So true, so true,
Well, another way of saying “everywhere you go, there you are” is using the math term “common denominator” — and today, what we’re going to attempt to tackle is, why is it that some of us, if we stepped back a moment to take a very real and honest assessment of our dating life, do we always end up with the same kind of guy? One who really isn’t the best for us; sometimes, not even close.
Before getting into some questions that I think can help you get to the answer, let me just say that this is definitely one of the kinds of pieces that may step on at least your pinky toe before it’s all said and done. At the same time, although this might not be the most comfortable of reads, keep in mind what the late poet, singer, and publisher Tuli Kupferberg once said, “When patterns are broken, new worlds emerge.”
And so, if when it comes to the caliber of men you’ve dated, what you’ve been doing is revealing that your pattern is not really working for your ultimate good, spend a bit of time trying to unpack just why that could be the case — why, at the end of the day, you truly are the common denominator in it all.
How Self-Aware Are You?
About five years ago, I penned an article for the site entitled “These Are The Things Self-Aware People Do Daily.” You know, of all of the things to be in this life, prioritizing self-awareness is king because self-aware people do things like hold themselves accountable, know their strengths and weaknesses, identify their triggers, have good boundaries, self-reflect, pay attention to their own “blind spots” — and they can — eh hem — take feedback and constructive criticism pretty well.
That last one? If you’re constantly in a hamster wheel or even a cul-de-sac when it comes to men, be honest with yourself: did your family, friends, hell, even your co-workers warn you about some of the guys you dated, and you found yourself either defending, deflecting or getting offended? Yeah, self-aware people don’t get down like that because they would rather have peace and be wrong than act like they are always right and remain in chaos.
So yeah, if you’re always in some foolishness or even in relationships that are simply a counterproductive waste of time, pondering how self-aware you actually are is a really good place to start. Self-reflect. Know your weaknesses. Listen to what others have to say about your tendencies. All of this can do you a whole lot of good.
How Humble Are You?
Society is a wild place, boy. The reason why I say that is because, while it’s out here acting like humility is a bad thing, Scripture says, “By humility and the fear of the Lord are riches and honor and life.” (Proverbs 22:4) And why is humility such a vital spiritual attribute? Because, when you’re humble — you’re grateful; you’re teachable; you’re open to seeing things outside of your own perspective; you’re compassionate and empathetic; you’re flexible; you’re forgiving, and you’re able to release your ego so that you can accept what you need over what you want.
What you need over what you want. Chile, if that doesn’t keep some people in cyclic stuff, I honestly don’t know what does. There’s a client that I have right now who only contacts me when she’s basically blown up her life because she constantly gets caught up in a man’s looks and bedroom performance. When I tell her that she needs to stop making that #1 and #2 of things to look for in a relationship, she “uh-huh's” me and then does what she wants to do anyway — only for it to end up wreaking all sorts of havoc…again.
It’s another message for another time about how some of us could stand to look within to see if wanting a fine man above all else is more about validating some deep-rooted insecurities that we have about our own looks (ouch). For now, I’ll just say that if your ego is out here telling you that looks and sexual performance should trump things like character and consistency, it is LYING to you. If you chose to heed the humble side of yourself, you would know that.
And this actually brings me to my next question.
How Stuck Are You in Your “Type”?
The reason why I wrote “According To Experts, We All Have A ‘Type’” back in the day is because it’s true — pretty much all of us have a type which is pretty much a preference; there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that either. At the same time, I’m advising, from very up close and personal experience, that it’s a good idea to spend some time pondering “the origin story” of where your type came from.
Me? I’m always gonna be down for a very tall, hella chocolate, basketball (or soccer) build Black man. However, I’m a sexual abuse survivor and my molester looked a lot like that, so during the healing process of what he did to me, I had to factor in his influence. Plus, my first love also fits the physical mold and he definitely had quite an impact on my life. So…see what I mean? My type didn’t just come out of nowhere. Yes, sometimes your type may have some trauma or drama attached to it. And yes, that might be really uncomfortable to think about; still, that doesn’t mean it’s not true.
Now my late fiancé? He was right at about 6’ and, complexion-wise, he was lighter than I am. He treated me better than most of the men of my past, though — and even though he definitely pursued me for a while to get me to consider us beyond being friends, because I took a risk outside of my type, I learned what it was like to be loved in a healthy way. And what that did for me was it taught me to remain open outside of my standard type. I still like a tall-ass Godiva man, chile (and don’t let him have a beard and be in a tailored suit!). I don’t limit myself to that package, though. To do so would be severely limiting — potentially tragic even.
How Healed Are You?
“Healed” is a word that comes up A LOT in the social media space. When it comes to relationships, specifically, it’s important to ask yourself if you are healed from your past because, if you aren’t, you very well could be reliving it over and over…and over again, whether you realize it (or choose to accept it) or not.
Just so that we’re all on the same page, the word “heal” means things like healthy, sound, and whole. Synonyms for the word include improve, restore, mend, soothe, and rehabilitate. Signs that you have healed from past hurts of a relationship (or a series of relationships) include you don’t think of them with anger or bitterness; you can see the silver linings from the experience; you’ve forgiven them for things that they did wrong (or that simply hurt you — and no, that’s not always one and the same), and you don’t pick (or avoid) other people to be in your life solely based on what someone else did to you.
What I mean by that last one is an unhealed woman may say something like, “I don’t want to do [such and such] for a first date. That’s what my ex liked to do.” The new guy isn’t him, so why does he have to be beholden to your past? Or, “I don’t trust men who won’t let me go through their phone. That’s how I found out my ex was cheating.” You know, for all of the women who like to play a non-animated form ofInspector Gadget (the real ones know), they sure don’t want their phones inspected as much as they like to do all of the inspecting. SMDH. Anyway, I don’t go through phones. For what? I don’t pay the bill and I’m not anyone’s parent. And so, your next guy not preferring it either? That doesn’t automatically mean that he’s up to no good — he may just want his boundaries respected. An unhealed person may not accept that. A healed one tends to, though.
And how can being unhealed play a direct role in you choosing the same guys over and over again? It’s weird because, sometimes you will go back to what’s familiar to you — because the new guy is such a risk, you’d prefer to “stick to the devil you know” than take a chance on someone who rolls very differently. It’s a cryptic way of remaining the common denominator in your dating dynamics. Oh, but it happens all of the time, chile.
What Makes a Man WRONG for You? Specifically?
Okay, with a lot of the inner work out of the way, how do you even come to the conclusion that someone (or several people) is wrong for you? Because you know what? Once you’ve done some real healing (and serious maturing), you can oftentimes find yourself accepting the fact that just because someone may not be right for you, that doesn’t automatically or necessarily make them a bad person. No, not at all.
Although the word “wrong” can mean that something or someone isn’t morally right, wrong also means things like erroneous, not suitable or appropriate, not in accordance with certain requirements, or — and please catch it — out of order (which sometimes consists of the right thing happening at the wrong time). So, if it does seem like you keep choosing (because it is always a choice; that is also where accountability comes in) men who aren’t appropriate, aren’t in accordance with your needs or standards, or who aren’t what you need at the time — why is that? Is it rooted in fear? Impatience? Settling? What?
I have had enough clients go through this to know that it’s not good enough to be abstract about someone being “wrong” for you. You need to set aside one weekend, get some wine and a fresh journal, and really get into what wrong looks like. For instance, if you keep lowering your standards (which is the wrong thing to do, by definition), why is that? Because no matter how wrong the guy may ultimately turn out to be, what you have to be willing to accept is — again — you chose him. Why do you choose what’s wrong? Because, more times than not, some red (or at least orange) flags were waving long before the relationship came crashing down; oftentimes, they reveal themselves within the first couple of dates. You just chose to ignore them.
One more.
Do You Know a Good Man When You See One? You Sure?
As we close all of this out, when you get a chance, please check out “Question: Is The Man In Your Life Good 'TO' You? Good 'FOR' You? Or...Both?” Learning the difference between “to” and “for” took my own relational processing to an entirely new and freeing level. And you know what? Back to the healing point, another way to know that you’ve healed is you don’t generalize men. Meaning, that if you’re out here declaring that there aren’t any good ones, that’s not true; you’re just jaded (I mean, it’s the truth), and that head and energy space is affecting your judgment and perspective.
That said, if you’re constantly selecting the wrong men, ask yourself if you even know what a good man looks like (cue India.Arie’s “Good Man”). Again, by definition, good means things like morally excellent, right, kind, friendly, benevolent, educated, financially sound (not rich, stable and responsible…goodness), genuine, reliable, dependable, responsible, attractive, warm, intimate — satisfactory to the purpose (yes, that’s a literal definition).
For a man to be good for you, you need to know what purpose he is to serve at this particular point in your life because if, for example, all men seem to do, in your eyes, is use you for sex, why are you prioritizing sex over an emotional connection if the latter is the purpose that you seek right now? A lot of women can stop being the common denominator when it comes to choosing the wrong man if they 1) become the good that they seek and 2) do not betray the purpose behind why they even desire a relationship in the first place.
____
I know. When things aren’t going your way when it comes to matters of the heart, it can be easy to always say it’s the man’s fault. If there’s a pattern, though, please be a bit more self-reflective than that.
Once you do, you’d be amazed by how much about you shifts — to where the wrong guys can’t even get close to you, in the way that they used to, anymore.
Because you cease to be the “common denominator” you once were.
And how wonderful is that?
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