Let's all take a moment to process just how long 2020 has been. Kobe died in 2020. Breonna Taylor was murdered in 2020. This pandemic put us in lockdown in 2020. Those three things alone feel like they happened at least five years ago. And shoot, that's not even touching on all of the personal challenges that I'm pretty sure all of us have experienced as well. Yeah, if ever a year tried it—and I do mean, tried it—2020 was the one. And yet, as we're just weeks away from 2021—which includes giving the crazy racist tyrant known as Donald John Trump the boot—I feel like we all can reference, what I still consider to be an Oscar-worthy performance by Derek Luke, when he played Antwone Fisher. Remember when he looked that no-good Mrs. Tate in the eyes and said, "I'm still standing. I'm still strong"? Take a bow, sis. You can concur. Hopefully, your relationship has been able to too.
If you're like "Yes, yet it feels like my relationship is hanging on by a thread", you're the one I had in mind when I decided to write this. Anyone who has been in something real, they know that even when life is good, keeping their relationship healthy and thriving can sometimes be a challenge. Oh, but when a colossal s—tshow like this year rolls around, it can really be hard to not want to just throw your hands up, say "I quit" and call it a wrap. Not so much because the feelings for your partner have changed or even that you are unhappy with your relationship; at least for the most part. It's just that, when stress and pressure are at their peak, it can be difficult to find the effort and energy to keep it all going.
King Solomon once said, "There is a time and season for everything." (Ecclesiastes 3:1) An ancient Jewish folktale is credited for the popular saying, "this too shall pass". And you know what? Both statements are absolutely true. 2020 is on its way out (hallelujah!) and if you value your romantic situation, I want to provide you with just a few hacks that can help the two of you to make it to the other side—relationship fully intact.
Separate Your Stressors
Wanna know a clear sign that you're rocking big girl panties on the regular? It's when you know how to compartmentalize your stress. What I mean by that is you learn to separate, say, work stress from home stress, so that you don't walk into the house, screaming at your partner, not because they did anything wrong but because you've been suppressing how much your coworker pisses you off.
2020 was full of bad news, financial challenges, disappointments, messy people, and negativity. I don't know about you, but there were actually some days when I thought I was gonna lose my mind because the hits just kept on coming. Sometimes, in order to regroup, I had to get really quiet and recenter myself, so that I didn't take my had-it-up-to-here-energy out on someone who truly didn't deserve it; not only didn't deserve it but someone who I needed to learn on for encouragement and support.
It's hard to make any kind of wise or emotionally mature decisions when you're under stress. So, in order to preserve your relationship—pray, meditate, journal, take a walk around the block…process what is stressing you out and why. If it has nothing to do with your relationship, don't punish your partner. If it does, share with them your feelings with the mindset of wanting to find a solution to the issue.
I'm telling you—being intentional about removing the stress out of your way helps you to have a totally different perspective on things. This includes your relationship. It really does.
Stop Doom Scrolling (and Doom Talking)
There's a Scripture in the Bible that says, "Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit." (Proverbs 18:21—NKJV) What it basically means is the words that you speak can produce life—or death. And y'all, whenever I do tiptoe into social media to see what folks are talking about, 6 out of every 10 posts seem to be about drama, death and/or doom. I can't tell you how many times I've read something along the lines of, "This year is gonna be the death of us and 2021 is going to be even worse."
Listen, it's one thing to be realistic; it's another thing to constantly dwell on negativity. And if you do that too much, it very easily can spill over into your relationship. For instance, if all you do is sit on Twitter and read about people complaining about how worthless men are (I really wish more Black women would remove themselves from that rhetoric; at the end of the day, it profits us and our community nothing), it can be very easy to nitpick at your own partner, even when he hasn't really done anything wrong.
In fact, there are plenty of studies to support the fact that surrounding yourself with constant negativity can affect/infect your thoughts and even your ability to reason well. Not only that but negativity can do a real number on your immune system too. So, for the sake of your relationship and your overall health and well-being, set social media engagement hours, watch how much news you check out, and set boundaries with the negative people in your world. 2020 is challenging enough without dwelling on things that will make your life worse, not better.
Remember Why You’re with Him
A wise person once said, "Before you quit, remember why you started." Something that truly self-aware and emotionally mature individuals can vouch for is the fact that, if you're actually paying attention, relationships tend to teach you more about yourself than anything—your strengths, weaknesses, areas where you could stand to grow and what you truly need and want (yes, in that order) in life. Sometimes, the life lessons can be so challenging that you can be tempted to dip out of your relationship; not because you no longer care about the person or even because the relationship doesn't have far more good times than not-so-good ones. It's just that, in the midst of the day-to-day that requires to keep a relationship afloat, you can start to feel like it might be better if you were alone; especially when there are so many other things to "try you"…like this year did.
If this is what you can personally relate to, my two cents are to pull out your journal and write down all of the reasons why you got involved with your partner in the first place. What do you love about him? What do you like about him? What do you respect and admire about him? In what ways does he make you better? What do you adore that he brings out of you?
If you let 2020 be too much of your focus, all of the financial stress, work demands, family pressures and whatever else was thrown at you can make you basically downplay the fact that you've got some awesome things that are happening in your world too. Once you finish that list, you might realize that your man and your relationship are easily in the top three.
Reflect on How the Support Actually Helped You Out
I once read an article that said an epidemic that has been happening in the midst of this pandemic is loneliness. A study that NPR conducted said that three out of five people in January of this year felt lonely—and y'all, that was before quarantining hit! One of my favorite Scriptures is found in Ephesians 4:9-11(NKJV). It says, "Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up. Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm; but how can one be warm alone?"
No relationship is perfect. That's because no two individuals are. Yet when you know that you know that you know that you've got someone who has your back, no matter what, it can make going through life so much easier. So, take a moment to really ponder the times when your partner has been a safe place to share secrets or even vent to. Reflect on the moments when you needed a kiss, hug, or pep talk and they provided it. When did you need help or a favor and they came through for you?
Support is something that, unfortunately, a lot of people didn't have much of this year. If out of all that you had to endure, that is one thing that you can't relate to, count yourself mighty blessed. A healthy relationship in the midst of trials and tribulations is a true gift indeed.
Put More of a Spiritual Focus on Your Relationship
This past spring, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, "7 Signs You're Spiritually Compatible With Someone". In many ways, it's a complement to the piece, "Here's Exactly How To Start Protecting Your Spirit" because, while a lot of folks automatically associate "spirit" with "religion", the spirit is actually about maintaining the quality of your life overall.
If you get nothing else out of this piece, please hold onto the fact that, when it comes to a lot of the married couples that I work with, a core reason why they struggle is that, not only do they not strive to uplift each other's spirit, they actually play a direct role in breaking it. Nagging. Berating. Always looking at the relationship from a "glass half empty" perspective. Never really having an affirming word to say. Or, they're out here making time for any and everything but one another which conveys to their partner that they're actually not a top priority (when they absolutely should be).
Even if money is super tight, putting forth the effort to breathe new life into your relationship—spending time with your partner, encouraging them, finding new ways to connect, admitting when you're wrong while striving to make things right, remembering to bring the Most High into the equation—is free of charge. And a relationship that has a strong spiritual foundation is one that can withstand, just about anything.
Make Plans for the Future
Just a few days away. Y'all, we are literally only a few days out of 2020 and into a whole new year—and decade. Instead of focusing so much on how much this year has (possibly) been pure trash, set aside a day where you and yours can turn on some of your favorite music, sip on a bottle of wine and discuss what you want your next few months (or couple of years) to look like. Planning for the future is a great form of positive thinking because it helps you to remember that putting good thoughts and intentions into what lies ahead can be super empowering—very comforting too. If you'd like to put a couple's vision board together, there are several 2021 vision board apps for you to choose from here.
I'm pretty sure you're aware of what self-sabotage is. Well, one way that many people do it is by allowing negativity to cause them to make in-the-moment decisions that are based on emotion more than reason and logic. Please don't let 2020 cause you to do that to your relationship. Again, we're just steps away from all of what this year brought our way. When it comes to your partner, as I once heard a character from one of my favorite television shows once say, "Lean. Don't push." When it comes to maintaining your relationship, those are awesome words to live by.
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney & Jill Marie Jones On 'Games Women Play' & Dating Over 40
What do you get when you mix unfiltered truths, high-stakes romance, and a few well-timed one-liners? You get Games Women Play—the sizzling new stage play by Je’Caryous Johnson that’s part relationship rollercoaster, part grown-woman group chat.
With a powerhouse cast that includes Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney, Jill Marie Jones, Carl Payne, Chico Bean, and Brian J. White, the play dives headfirst into the messy, hilarious, and heart-wrenching games people play for love, power, and peace of mind. And the women leading this story? They’re bringing their whole selves to the stage—and leaving nothing behind.
From Script to Spotlight
The road to Games Women Play started over 20 years ago—literally.
“This script was written 20 years ago,” Jill Marie Jones said with a smile. “It was originally called Men, Money & Gold Diggers, and I was in the film version. So when Je’Caryous called me to bring it to the stage, I was like, ‘Let’s go.’” Now reimagined for 2025, the play is updated with sharp dialogue and modern relationship dynamics that feel all too real.
Demetria McKinney, no stranger to Je’Caryous Johnson’s productions, jumped at the opportunity to join the cast once again. “This is my third time working with him,” she shared. “It was an opportunity to stretch. I’d never been directed by Carl Payne before, and the chance to work with talent I admire—Jill, Claudia, Chico—it was a no-brainer.”
Claudia Jordan joked that she originally saw the role as just another check. “I didn’t take it that seriously at first,” she admitted. “But this is my first full-on tour—and now I’ve got a whole new respect for how hard people work in theater. This ain’t easy.”
Modern Love, Stage Left
The play doesn’t hold back when it comes to the messier parts of love. One jaw-dropping moment comes when a live podcast proposal flips into a prenup bombshell—leaving the audience (and the characters) gasping.
Demetria broke it down with honesty. “People don’t ask the real questions when they date. Like, ‘Do you want kids? How do you feel about money?’ These convos aren’t happening, and then everyone’s confused. That moment in the play—it’s real. That happens all the time.”
Jill chimed in, noting how the play speaks to emotional disconnect. “We’re giving each other different tokens of love. Men might offer security and money. Women, we’re giving our hearts. But there’s a disconnect—and that’s where things fall apart.”
And then Claudia, of course, took it all the way there. “These men don’t even want to sign our prenups now!” she laughed. “They want to live the soft life, too. Wearing units, gloss, getting their brows done. We can’t have nothing! Y’all want to be like us? Then get a damn period and go through menopause.”
Dating Over 40: “You Better Come Correct”
When the conversation turned to real-life relationships, all three women lit up. Their experiences dating in their 40s and 50s have given them both clarity—and zero tolerance for games.
“I feel sexier than I’ve ever felt,” said Jill, who proudly turned 50 in January. “I say what I want. I mean what I say. I’m inside my woman, and I’m not apologizing for it.”
Demetria added that dating now comes with deeper self-awareness. “Anybody in my life is there because I want them there. I’ve worked hard to need nobody. But I’m open to love—as long as you keep doing what got me there in the first place.”
For Claudia, the bar is high—and the peace is priceless. “I’ve worked hard for my peace,” she said. “I’m not dating for food. I’m dating because I want to spend time with you. And honestly, if being with you isn’t better than being alone with my candles and fountains and cats? Then no thanks.”
Channeling Strength & Icon Status
Each actress brings something different to the play—but all of them deliver.
“I actually wish I could be messier on stage,” Claudia joked. “But I think about my grandmother—she was born in 1929, couldn’t even vote or buy a house without a man, and didn’t give a damn. She was fearless. That’s where my strength comes from.”
For Jill, the comparisons to her iconic Girlfriends character Toni Childs aren’t far off—but this role gave her a chance to dig deeper. “If you really understood Toni, you’d see how layered she was. And Paisley is the same—misunderstood, but strong. There’s more to her than people see at first glance.”
Demetria, who juggles singing and acting seamlessly, shared that live theater pushes her in a new way. “Every moment on stage counts. You can’t redo anything. It’s a different kind of love and discipline. You have to give the performance away—live, in the moment—and trust that it lands.”
Laughter, Lessons & Black Girl Gems
The show has plenty of laugh-out-loud moments—and the cast isn’t shy about who steals scenes.
“Chico Bean gets a lot of gasps and laughs,” Claudia said. “And Naomi Booker? Every scene she’s in—she’s hilarious.”
But the play isn’t just about humor. It leaves space for reflection—especially for Black women.
“I hope we get back to the foundation of love and communication,” said Demetria. “A lot of us are in protector mode. But that’s turned into survival mode. We’ve lost softness. We’ve lost connection.”
Claudia agreed. “We’re doing it all—but it’s not because we want to be strong all the time. It’s because we have to be. And I just want women to know: You can have peace, you can be soft. But stop bringing your old pain into new love. Don’t let past heartbreak build walls so high that the right person can’t climb over.”
Final Act: Pack the House
If there’s one thing this cast agrees on, it’s that this play isn’t just entertainment—it’s necessary.
“Atlanta is the Black entertainment hub,” Claudia said. “We need y’all to show up for this play. Support the arts. Support each other. Because when we pack the house, we make space for more stories like this.”
Games Women Play is more than a play—it’s a mirror. You’ll see yourself, your friends, your exes, and maybe even your next chapter. So get ready to laugh, reflect, and maybe even heal—because the games are on.
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It’s officially Miss Keri, Baby season again—and if you ask us, it’s been a long time coming. After 15 years away from the music scene, Keri Hilson has returned not only with a brand-new album, but also a captivating new role in Lifetime’s Fame—the latest installment in The Temptations film franchise.
Between the album We Need to Talk: Love and her leading role in Fame, this isn’t just a comeback—it’s a rebirth. The Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter turned actress is letting us into her world like never before, unpacking themes of vulnerability, healing, and inner strength with grace, grit, and raw artistry.
Now streaming on Lifetime, Fame follows two superstar sisters—played by Keri and singer/actress Keshia Chanté—as they navigate the cost of stardom, sibling rivalry, and the dark side of desire. The film also stars Romeo Miller, Ecstasia Sanders, Nathan Witte, and Sophie Carriere, and is executive produced by Derrick Williams and Adriane Hopper Williams of the Seven Deadly Sins franchise.
As for the music? We Need to Talk: Love is a three-part album (Love, Drama, Redemption) that tells the story of a woman who’s been through it—and has risen from the ashes. “It was time to speak for myself,” Keri says.
We sat down with Keri to talk about her return to music, her passion for acting, the emotional depth of Fame, and how she’s learning to care for herself amidst the chaos.
From R&B Queen to Drama Star: Keri Gets Into Character
“Even though she’s famous—as am I—it was really her humanity that I wanted to portray.”
Keri plays Cherish, one half of a superstar sibling duo who must confront their fractured relationship in the wake of a traumatic robbery. For Keri, the role was more than a character—it was a psychological study.
“I enjoy departures from reality. That’s why I love acting,” she shares. “Psychology is one of my favorite things in life. I became a writer because I’m an observer of human nature, emotion, and behavior. I think I did a good job showing her humanity.”
The Fame Isn’t Always Worth the Price
“Keep the main thing the main thing.”
Keri doesn’t sugarcoat the industry. When asked about what Fame reveals about the dark side of celebrity culture, her answer is clear:
“It’s a cautionary tale. It reminds you to keep your family close and not allow anything to come between them—especially in pursuit of success. Keep the main thing the main thing. For me, that’s family, love, spirituality, and values.”
Three Chapters, One Story: Love. Drama. Redemption.
“I’ve shed the fear. It was time to tell my own story.”
Released April 18th, We Need to Talk: Love is Keri’s first album in 15 years—and a deeply personal one at that. The three-part project (Love, Drama, Redemption) represents a timeline of healing and growth.
“I’m finally in a place where I’m able and willing to open up more,” she says. “For a while, I became really guarded—shell-shocked, even—after making mistakes in the public eye. Whether it’s all your fault or not, the scrutiny takes its toll. But now, I’ve shed that fear. It’s time to tell my story.”
Cooking, Walks, and Recalibrating in the Chaos
“I’m not doing the best job—but I’m doing what I can.”
Between eight-hour rehearsals, press runs, and music releases, Hilson admits she hasn’t quite figured out the balance yet—but she’s trying. For her, the key is carving out small rituals of normalcy.
“I enjoy cooking. That’s my sanctity,” she says. “I’ll go home, take my makeup off, put on my rehearsal clothes, and cook a meal. I take walks. I run. These little things help me feel like myself again.”
Art Imitates Life (and Album Tracklists)
“Cherish goes from Love… to Drama… to Redemption.”
Asked which album chapter her Fame character would fall into, Keri doesn’t hesitate. “She fits into all three,” she says. “You see her go from love, to drama, to redemption. That arc mirrors the journey of so many women who’ve had to navigate pain and find their way back to themselves.”
No Pressure, Just Art: Keri Wants You to Feel Something
“Just enjoy the art. That’s it.”
After all the time, patience, and healing, Keri isn’t asking for much. She just wants fans to press play—and feel something.
“I just want people to enjoy what they’re seeing and hearing. Enjoy me on screen. Enjoy me through their ears. People have waited, and I feel blessed by that. That helps me keep it all pure and simple.”
As Keri Hilson steps boldly back into the spotlight, it’s clear this era is all about alignment, artistry, and authenticity. With Fame airing on Lifetime and the first chapter of We Need to Talk: Love setting the tone, we’re more than excited to see what’s next.
As she continues to unfold the album’s next two chapters—Drama and Redemption—one thing’s for sure: this isn’t just a comeback. It’s a reintroduction. And we’ll be watching, listening, and cheering her on every step of the way.
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