

11 Boss Women On The Biggest Career Mistakes They Made In Their 20s
From choosing love over our career goals to not negotiating, there are so many career mistakes that young women make.
When we are in our 20s, we are at a very vulnerable state in our lives. For some of us, we just finished college, are working at our first “real" jobs, and we are even starting families. Through the midst of it all, we tend to make simple mistakes as it relates to our careers. Since I graduated from undergrad, I've made plenty of the same mistakes that my female friends have made. I cringe now when I think of them from time to time, but now that I know better, I try my best to do better.
Recently, I was able to connect with a few girl bosses in various careers and personal backgrounds. Each woman shared their biggest career mistake and what they learned from it. Whether you are a graduating college senior, just starting out on your own, or a 20-something woman that is already working, you will be able to benefit from the wisdom of each of the boss women below. Each woman shared her own career mistake and how they've managed to get in formation (slay girl, slay!)
1. Sheena Allen (@whoisSheena)
Entrepreneur & Founder of Sheena Allen Apps & Insta Funds
Learn when to ask for help.
"My biggest career mistake in my 20s was thinking that I could do it all on my own. I started my first tech company as a solo founder and actually waited a good amount of time before seeking mentorship or a team to help in growing my company. I learned that it is important to have a great team in order to build a great company. Trying to do everything on your own will tire and stress you out, which only leads to hurting your company."
2. Troy Washington (@thetroyla)
On-Air News Reporter for KSLA
Have faith in yourself over everyone & everything else.
"I vowed that I would keep this mistake between myself and the reporter who found me bawling my eyes out in the restroom but if it helps someone else out in their career then I suppose the embarrassment is worth it. It took a nightmare live shot during the evening news to teach me that you shouldn't depend on technology. No matter how confident you are in your smartphone, keep a backup plan!
"I was reporting live on a complicated story, the anchor tossed my phone to me and my iPhone cancelled out of my notes. I spent the entire shot stumbling and trying to open the note in my phone. Finally to no avail I tossed the phone back to the anchors feeling defeated. To top it off a viewer came up to me right after and said "got a little tongue tied there at 5." I was mortified. Now no matter how simple or complex the story is I don't complicate things or depend on anything else. I rely on old fashioned pen, pad, bullet points, and what I know. This taught me to trust myself instead of a flimsy note in my phone.
"Believe it or not that moment built my confidence because I knew I could never repeat that mistake. In essence falling on my face has always delivered the best lessons. That was one of my first live shots and I've done hundreds more since then but I'll never forget that one. That's the one that humbled me, it hurt, and taught me that I never wanted to experience it again. In TV, you'll make mistakes and that's inevitable because you're human and likely those mistakes will be broadcasted, but as long as you don't repeat those mistakes, you'll be fine."
3. Shay Lawson (@ShayMLawson )
Diversity Professional & Attorney
Stay hopeful, be fearless, & focus on you.
"I have quite a few career mistakes that comes to mind, but this one sticks out the most:
"When you start working, you need to negotiate. Women make $0.79 for every $1 a man makes, often because men demand more. I didn't even know this was an option when I was in my twenties and in talking to my girlfriends they all agreed that they wish they had negotiated for a higher salary in their first few jobs. I know that's not something most young women are comfortable doing, but men do it ALL THE TIME!!!
"Do the research, know how much people at the job and experience level make, and also come prepared to explain why you want what you're asking be it for relocation, for cost of living, etc. Once you've been offered a job, don't worry you will lose the offer. You're not being petty over pennies, you're getting what you're worth."
4. Emily Drewry (@emily.drewry)
Assistant Social Media Editor at Forbes
Never let the world drown out your voice.
"My biggest mistake thus far has been holding back my thoughts in the workplace because I lacked confidence. As a 22-year-old in my first role out of school, I would frequently wait to bring ideas to the table until I was 100% sure they were good and would be successful. At a certain point, my boss sat me down and told me that I needed to stop focusing on my age and let the ideas speak for themselves.
"It's harder than it sounds to forget about seniority and structure at the office, but doing so let me shine so much more -- and perform better in my role. I try to remember that every day is a new opportunity to prove my skills, and I can't do that without speaking up."
5. Gia Peppers (@giapeppers)
Freelance Entertainment Journalist & On Air Talent (portfolio includes the NBA, BET, ESSENCE, Hot 97 & more)
Be faithful & fearless to YOURSELF.
"I've learned a lot in the first five years of my 20s. The top thing I want other young women to know is that an internship doesn't guarantee a job & you should be loyal to you. In college, I interned almost every semester to make sure I knew exactly what I wanted to do in radio and/or TV. When I graduated, my resume was stacked with "experience." I just KNEW everyone was going to be knocking at my door (or LinkedIn page) with opportunities. But, after I got all my cookout celebrations out of the way, I still had no offers and had to take a job outside of my field to start paying back loans. I hated it. I would go in the bathroom and cry.
"BUT, the resources I had-- like a laptop and overnight car service-- motivated me to work all hours of the night to ensure I would not be there longer than one year. Every moment you have is meant to prepare you for the next one. Do your best in that moment and learn all you can. And, don't be surprised if no one calls you RIGHT after you graduate. It takes a job to get a job. Once you get that job, be loyal to YOU. Our parents grew up in a time when you could stay at one company for 20 years and move up to make more money and gain experience within the company. Unfortunately, our generation doesn't have that security. In many fields, companies barely pay full salaries with benefits. In fact, many of these same companies don't offer raises until an employee threatens to leave. Have your own brand. Make yourself irreplaceable and save for rainy days. In this economic climate, you will probably have some."
6. Nicaila (Caila) Matthews (@CailaKSpeaks)
Senior Manager of Social Marketing at NPR, Founder of CailaKSpeaks.com
Setbacks are temporary. Comebacks create legends.
"My biggest career mistake in my 20s was believing that a job at a big media conglomerate would guarantee happiness and career growth. I was lured by the brand's name and glitzy reputation, but I did not take the time to assess how it aligned with my career goals. Two years and one horrible boss later, I ended up quitting my first job out of college and going through a frustrating period of unemployment, having to move back home, and feeling like a failure. I bounced back by starting to side hustle as a blogger and freelance writer, which led me to my calling as a digital and content marketer.
"If you're reading this and experiencing the same feelings of disappointment and confusion that I did, take the time to assess what you want from your career and life and write down three things you plan to do to get there. I worked at an unrelated job for one and a half years while I hustled to get to the next stage of my career, and ended up living with my parents for three years (two years longer than I planned). In the end I know you'll be happier and that much closer to fulfilling your authentic purpose on this earth. This low point in my career would later propel me into social media marketing and drive me to get my MBA. As I learned from my experience, sometimes you have to take a step backward before you can move forward in pursuit of your goals."
7. Sidnee Michelle Douyon (@sidmich_)
Editorial Operations Assistant at Forbes, and Music and Entertainment Writer/Reporter
Never let your insecurities get in the way.
"My biggest career mistake I've made in my 20's would be second guessing myself. There were times I was hesitant and even shied away from going after certain opportunities and interviews because I thought I didn't have what it takes to execute at 100%. I learned that you have to always go for what you want, especially in your career.
"If you let the fear of failure or your insecurities keep you from going after what you deserve than you'll never reach the heights of your potential. If I could go back in time to prepare myself for the struggles I went through, I wouldn't do anything different but develop a personal confidence within myself early on and really use that as a driving factor to push me forward in my career. Fast forward, I've definitely evolved into a much more confident journalist. Before I even execute an interview or gain an opportunity, I go into it like I know I'm going to "kill this." I also have evolved my work ethic to align with a 'newfound career confidence' where I put in the work & research to be able to go into an assignment or interview 100% confident and prepped."
8. Melissa Kimble (@Melissa_Kimble)
Senior Social Media Manager at EBONY, Leader of The#blkcreatives
Know when to walk away & when to stay.
"The biggest mistake I've made is giving away my power. Anytime my true value wasn't recognized or my energy was being depleted in situations that didn't fulfill or honor me, I should have made the decision to walk away from those things sooner.
"If you're constantly giving away your power, you're living in a place of fear and fear destroys everything, especially your chance to succeed and build the career life you really want for yourself."
9. Ariel Lopez (@ArielLopez__)
Founder of 2020Shift
Try to make the most out of every situation & be the best.
"The biggest mistake I made was making a leap before I was ready (I was 22 at the time) I was working full time at a staffing firm and also on a startup idea when I was presented with an opportunity to work from home. I immediately thought that this is was a dream situation. Make money and have more time to work on my own thing- why not? Unfortunately the position fell through within a month's time and I had to scramble to figure out how to make it. I went through a super rough time and almost had to move back home (nightmare) but was able to land something a few months later. I learned that you can't try to game the system. I wasn't taking the position to give 100% effort to them, I was using them as a catalyst to get my own thing off the ground (bad karma). It also taught me to really think things through before making life altering decisions. I wasn't financially prepared to sustain myself and my expenses if my job didn't work out.
"Ultimately, I took a risk on leaving something stable to pursue the unknown, but I think it paid off. That experience fueled me to do it all over again, just better. I actually don't believe in mistakes, just lessons learned. I recently took the leap again, but this time I had things aligned differently. Since then, I've evolved a ton as entrepreneur and also as a career coach. I'm able to advise people on their careers because of my personal experience. It's also showed me that if I can bounce back once I could do it twice. I'm unafraid because I know what I'm capable of."
10. Emmelie De La Cruz (@EmmelieDeLaCruz)
Author of Make Yourself Marketable& Personal Branding Strategist
Your personal brand is more important than you may think.
"The biggest career mistake I made was believing that I needed the right credentials to be an expert. Have you heard of Malala? Imagine if she censored herself because she considered herself too young and her story insignificant. We wouldn't have the youngest Nobel Peace Prize winner. Our personal brand is a combination of our personality, skill sets, and the value we create for others.
"It is all about who we are, what we do and how others perceive us through those in-person and digital interactions. Building your personal brand inside and outside the workplace is necessary to accelerate your career. Our insecurities around self-promotion, our credentials, and contributions will disappear when we understand that the stakes for us to succeed as a sisterhood are so high that we are almost forced to tell our story for the sake of being a resource to someone else. We have an important story that needs to be told and heard. The unique combination of your personal and professional experience, your skills and accomplishments already make you an expert."
11. Tola Lawal (@tola617)
Entrepreneur & Founder of SixOne7Creative
Never let them see you sweat or lose your cool.
"One of my biggest career mistakes was bringing my emotions to work. In my early 20's I let a co-worker take me out of my professional element and I went OFF in the office. My bosses and co-workers were SHOCKED! I was a great employee and most times I ignored the tomfoolery but at that point I was fed up. As busy as I was supporting a number of senior level executives, I didn't have time. But that day... that day, I had time. But after I lit the office up, I was SO embarrassed. After this mistake, I learned a few things. I learned the importance of a poker face, and that most of what goes on at work is not personal. Don't take any of it personally. If there is an issue, go to your immediate boss, and if that doesn't resolve the issue, take it to Human Resources.
"BUT don't EVER give someone the satisfaction of taking you out of your calm which can result in you embarrassing yourself. Since that mistake, I don't take much personally. There is always going to be someone, something, that ruffles your feathers at work. Be like a duck and keep calm. Don't let anything get to you, and if it does, vent in private. Vent to your accountability partners, your friends, but NEVER, EVER at work."
Featured image by Shay M. Lawson
Originally published December 9, 2017
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Brittani Hunter is a proud PVAMU alumni and the founder of The Mogul Millennial, a business and career platform for Black Millennials. Meet Brittani on Twitter and on the Gram at @BrittaniLHunter and @mogulmillennial.
Smile, Sis! These Five Improvements Can Upgrade Your Oral Hygiene Instantly
This article is in partnership with Sensodyne.
Our teeth are connected to so many things - our nutrition, our confidence, and our overall mood. We often take for granted how important healthy teeth are, until issues like tooth sensitivity or gum recession come to remind us. Like most things related to our bodies, prevention is the best medicine. Here are five things you can do immediately to improve your oral hygiene, prevent tooth sensitivity, and avoid dental issues down the road.
1) Go Easy On the Rough Brushing: Brushing your teeth is and always will be priority number one in the oral hygiene department. No surprises there! However, there is such a thing as applying too much pressure when brushing…and that can lead to problems over time. Use a toothbrush with soft bristles and brush in smooth, circular motions. It may seem counterintuitive, but a gentle approach to brushing is the most effective way to clean those pearly whites without wearing away enamel and exposing sensitive areas of the teeth.
2) Use A Desensitizing Toothpaste: As everyone knows, mouth pain can be highly uncomfortable; but tooth sensitivity is a whole different beast. Hot weather favorites like ice cream and popsicles have the ability to trigger tooth sensitivity, which might make you want to stay away from icy foods altogether. But as always, prevention is the best medicine here. Switching to a toothpaste like Sensodyne’s Sensitivity & Gum toothpaste specifically designed for sensitive teeth will help build a protective layer over sensitive areas of the tooth. Over time, those sharp sensations that occur with extremely cold foods will subside, and you’ll be back to treating yourself to your icy faves like this one!
3) Floss, Rinse, Brush. (And In That Order!): Have you ever heard the saying, “It’s not what you do, but how you do it”? Well, the same thing applies to taking care of your teeth. Even if you are flossing and brushing religiously, you could be missing out on some of the benefits simply because you aren’t doing so in the right order. Flossing is best to do before brushing because it removes food particles and plaque from places your toothbrush can’t reach. After a proper flossing sesh, it is important to rinse out your mouth with water after. Finally, you can whip out your toothbrush and get to brushing. Though many of us commonly rinse with water after brushing to remove excess toothpaste, it may not be the best thing for our teeth. That’s because fluoride, the active ingredient in toothpaste that protects your enamel, works best when it gets to sit on the teeth and continue working its magic. Rinsing with water after brushing doesn’t let the toothpaste go to work like it really can. Changing up your order may take some getting used to, but over time, you’ll see the difference.
4) Stay Hydrated: Upping your water supply is a no-fail way to level up your health overall, and your teeth are no exception to this rule. Drinking water not only helps maintain a healthy pH balance in your mouth, but it also washes away residue and acids that can cause enamel erosion. It also helps you steer clear of dry mouth, which is a gateway to bad breath. And who needs that?
5) Show Your Gums Some Love: When it comes to improving your smile, you may be laser-focused on getting your teeth whiter, straighter, and overall healthier. Rightfully so, as these are all attributes of a megawatt smile; but you certainly don’t want to leave gum health out of the equation. If you neglect your gums, you’ll start to notice the effects of plaque buildup, which can irritate the gums and cause gingivitis, the earliest stage of gum disease. Seeing blood while brushing and flossing is a tell-tale sign that your gums are suffering. You may also experience gum recession — a condition where the gum tissue surrounding your teeth pulls back, exposing more of your tooth. Brushing at least twice a day with a gum-protecting toothpaste like Sensodyne Sensitivity and Gum, coupled with regular dentist visits, will keep your gums shining as bright as those pearly whites.
Jodie Turner-Smith Files For Divorce From Joshua Jackson After Nearly 4 Years Of Marriage
2023 has become the year of celebrity breakups with headlines breaking left and right about celebs filing for divorce or ending high-profile relationships. The latest couple to announce their dissolution? British actress Jodie Turner-Smith. TMZ reported that Jodie has filed for a divorce from her husband, Dawson Creek alum Joshua Jackson.
As far as her reason for calling it quits, Jodie cited "irreconcilable differences," according to TMZ, and has requested joint custody of the couple's daughter, Juno Rose Diana Jackson. Late last year there were rumblings of there being "trouble in paradise" for the couple after the media realized they were no longer following each other on Instagram.
Those rumors were more than laid to rest when Jodie and Joshua went to the 2023 Oscars together earlier this year, and even more recently, when they celebrated her birthday together last month during the September unveiling of the Lotus Emeya.
Jodie Turner-Smith celebrates her birthday with husband Joshua Jackson at the unveiling of the new fully-electric Lotus Emeya on September 07, 2023 in New York City.
Brian Ach/Getty Images for Lotus
Despite seeming particularly happy and in love, perhaps the writing was already written on the wall even then. In the past, Jodie has been very celebratory publicly about her love for her estranged husband, even boldly recounting their love story for the books in a 2021 interview with Seth Meyers.
When Jodie and Joshua met, it was while at his birthday party in 2018. Their relationship was hot and heavy from the start, with Jodie openly noting that they began as a "one-night stand." During her 2021 interview with Seth Meyers, she jokingly referred to their love story as a "three-year one-night stand." She shared:
"First of all, I saw him before he saw me and when I saw him, I was like, 'I want that.' And then when he saw me, I just pretended like I didn't see him. He had to yell across the room to me, and I was wearing this T-shirt from a movie called Sorry to Bother You and [actress] Tessa Thompson plays a character called Detroit, and she has this T-shirt that says, 'The Future Is Female Ejaculation.'
"And so, he shouts across the room, 'Detroit!' He comes over and… does this really cute, charming thing that he does and just all night -- he just basically followed me around the party."
The couple were together from that moment forth, and even made things "Instagram official" less than two weeks later while on a dinner date. Joshua would later clarify to Insider that the night they met in 2018 was not a 'one-night stand' or a 'three-year one-night stand' like his then-wife joked but instead, it was "technically a three-night stand."
"It was sealed with a kiss that night and then we didn't leave each other's sides for, well, three years now," Joshua continued at the time.
In a July 2021 interview with Jimmy Fallon, Joshua dropped more details about the why behind getting married. He revealed that he didn't know he wanted to get married to Jodie until "the moment she asked me."
"She asked me on New Year's Eve. We were in Nicaragua. It was very beautiful, incredibly romantic, we were walking down the beach and she asked me to marry her."
He added, "I did not know [she would propose], but she was quite adamant and she was right. This is the best choice I ever made."
Joshua Jackson Reveals Jodie Turner-Smith Proposed To Him
Jodie received quite a bit of flack for proposing to Joshua because it goes against tradition and what society sees as acceptable for a woman to do to a man, and proposing isn't one of them. No matter how much time has passed, the viewpoints around who should do the proposing and who should be proposed to are still very traditional.
After being on the receiving end of such backlash, Joshua would later clarify to the media in a separate interview that it wasn't just Jodie's proposal to him that sealed the deal of them getting married, he proposed to her too. She might have initiated it, but Joshua followed through.
"I accidentally threw my wife under the bus because that story was told quickly and it didn't give the full context and holy Jesus, the internet is racist and misogynist," he explained to Refinery29 that same year. "We were in Nicaragua on a beautiful moonlit night, it could not possibly have been more romantic."
David M. Benett/Dave Benett/Getty Images
He continued, "And yes, my wife did propose to me and yes, I did say yes, but what I didn't say in that interview was there was a caveat, which is that I'm still old school enough that I said, 'This is a yes, but you have to give me the opportunity [to do it too].'"
"She has a biological father and a stepdad, who's the man who raised her. [I said], 'You have to give me the opportunity to ask both of those men for your hand in marriage.' And then, 'I would like the opportunity to re-propose to you and do it the old-fashioned way down on bended knee.' So, that's actually how the story ended up."
Joshua and Jodie would eventually marry in December 2019. Shortly thereafter, Jodie gave birth to the couple's first child, Janie, in 2020.
In a recent interview with Elle UK, Jodie shared the ways becoming a mother to Juno helped to heal her of her wounds from colorism she experienced in the past. "It's interesting because I had a lot of resistance to becoming a mother and, throughout my life, I always said if I were to have children, I wanted to have Black, Black babies so that I could affirm them as children with the love that I felt I needed to have been affirmed with by the outside world," Jodie shared with the outlet.
She continued, "Then I fell in love with my husband and we talked about having kids. I did have this mini pause, where I was like, 'She's going to be walking through the world not only having an experience that I did not have, but looking like people that, in a way, I'd always felt a little bit tormented by.' Now that I've got this little, tiny, light-skinned boss, I feel like it’s the universe teaching me lessons. I've been given a daughter who looks this way to heal my own conversations around colorism."
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Featured image by Amy Sussman/Getty Images