Alicia Keys Says She Was 'Embarrassed' To Ask For Help Early On In Her Career
Singer and entrepreneur Alicia Keys recently recalled the challenges she encountered early in her career, prompting her to create a mentorship program for young women.
Keys rose to fame in 2001 following her debut album, Songs in A Minor. The album, which featured the hit singles "Fallin'" and "A Woman's Worth," would ultimately sell over 10 million copies. Throughout Keys' two-decade career, the "If I Ain't Got You" vocalist has participated in various acting projects, created a skincare brand, released nine studio albums, sold more than 65 million records worldwide, and won countless awards.
Since then, Keys has taken the knowledge she has learned within the entertainment industry over the years and is sharing those gems with the creation of her mentorship program, She Is The Music. During a June interview with Metro, the 42-year-old opened up about She Is The Music and why she felt an organization like this would have benefitted her early on in her career.
Alicia Keys On She Is The Music Program And Her Early Career Struggles
She Is The Music was founded in 2018 by Keys, Jody Gerson, Sam Kirby, and Ann Mincieli. The outlet reports that Keys' inspiration for the nonprofit organization stemmed from a study she saw the year before about the lack of "female creators in the industry." She Is The Music's mission is to support and guide young women in all aspects of the music industry.
In the discussion, Keys --who was promoting Uncharted, a documentary that showcased the behind-the-scenes look of She Is The Music's songwriting camp-- raved about the mentorship program and explained that she would've enjoyed being a part of it during the early stages of her career due to the various challenges she encountered when seeking mentors.
"I think about that a lot. I've talked a lot about the way that I didn't always feel like I had mentorship, or I didn't know who to reach out to," she said. "I didn't really know if they would want to help me, or I felt embarrassed about it. I think it's really beautiful to create an organization like She Is The Music, where you feel like you can create a sisterhood."
Further, into the interview, Keys added that She Is The Music is more than just about opening doors for young women. The mother of two disclosed that although each person that joins the mentorship program would be given opportunities to work alongside established women, the main goal is to create a sisterhood.
"You can have a place to go where people care about, maybe giving you opportunities to learn under another established woman. Or in a business sense of something that you're interested in," she stated. "I definitely think I would have felt more inclined to reach out and create more of a sisterhood and really know that we can work together and create what we want for ourselves and the world."
On Not Feeling Shameful
Inc. reported that most people feel shameful about seeking help for any particular situation because it isn't ideal for individuals to talk about a problem they may be facing. Another factor contributing to the shame is that mentors usually aren't getting paid for their services.
The publication said that although it may not be ideal to some, in the corporate world, many are always asking others, including the higher ups for advice or help with their issues because it is for the betterment of everyone involved.
On Taking The First Steps
In finding a suitable mentor, one can't be afraid to take the first step.
According to Inc., many professionals are always trying to find ways to "give back to the community," even if it means offering their guidance and knowledge in a particular field. But because those professionals aren't actively seeking mentees, you have to take the first step.
Taking the first step may mean taking the person out for coffee and starting a "conversation to pick their brain" about a particular subject. This tactic could form a long-term relationship that could benefit your career.
On Setting Boundaries
The third and final rule of landing a mentor is to set boundaries early on.
Setting boundaries is important because you want to avoid taking advantage of someone willing to help you. Due to mentoring being, at most times, an unpaid gig, it is essential to only ask for help when needed. Inc. suggested that the one way to set boundaries after obtaining a mentor is to ask them for their availability and preferred contact method.
Hopefully, these three tips have provided some insight into how to land a mentor.
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Feature image by Theo Wargo/Getty Images for Tribeca Festival
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Kendrick Lamar And Whitney Alford: A Timeline Of Their Decades-Long Relationship
Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford are one of those couples who like to live their lives outside of the public eye. Unlike many celebrity couples, we don’t really hear a lot of details about their relationship in blogs and social media except for when Kendrick raps about it. Whitney has even been featured on many of her fiancé’s songs, but it was his last album, Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers, where he was the most vulnerable.
Outside of supporting her Pulitzer Prize-winning man, Whitney is also a licensed esthetician and makeup artist. The couple share two beautiful children together and seem to enjoy their privacy. From high school sweethearts to starting a family, here is a timeline of Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford’s relationship.
2001-2005?: Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford Meet
Whitney Alford and Kendrick Lamar at 2016 Key to the City Ceremony
Photo by Johnny Nunez/Getty Images
Kendrick and Whitney met in high school. However, there’s not a lot of details about what year. The two attended Centennial High School, which is located in Compton, CA, and began dating shortly after becoming friends.
2009: Kendrick Lamar Raps About Whitney
In his 2009 self-titled EP, Kendrick rapped about Whitney in the songs “She Needs Me” and “Determined.” He highlighted how he can’t live without her in “She Needs Me” and shared how she’s been his rock in “Determined.”
2014: Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford’s First Public Appearance as a Couple
56th Grammy Awards with Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford
Photo by Christopher Polk/Getty Images for NARAS
Whitney stepped out with Kendrick for the first time at the 56th Grammy Awards. Kendrick was nominated for seven awards, including Best Rap Album for Good Kid, M.A.A.D City.
2015: Kendrick Calls Whitney His Best Friend
Talking to Billboard in January, the Compton rapper opened up about his love for Whitney. “I wouldn’t even call her my girl,” he said. “That’s my best friend. I don’t even like the term that society has put in the world as far as being a companion — she’s somebody I can tell my fears to.”
Whitney Appears on Kendrick’s "To Pimp a Butterfly" Album
In March 2015, Kendrick dropped his highly anticipated third album, To Pimp a Butterfly, andWhitney provided backup vocals for songs “King Kunta” and “Wesley’s Theory.”
Kendrick Confirms Engagement to Whitney Alford
Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford at 2015 BET Awards
Photo by Johnny Nunez/BET/Getty Images for BET
During a The Breakfast Club interview, the Grammy award-winning artist confirmed that he and his high school sweetheart were engaged. “Yeah, definitely,” he said. “I’m loyal to the soul.”
2019: Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford Welcome Their First Child
It was reported that the couple had their first child in July 2019. While her name wasn’t revealed at the time, fans later suggested that he mentioned her name in his song “Mr. Morale,” which is off of his fifth album, Mr. Morale & the Big Steppers. He rapped, “Uzi, your father's in deep meditation.”
2022: Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford Welcomes Their Second Child
The couple quietly welcomed a second child, a baby boy named Enoch and they made the big reveal on the cover of the Mr. Morale & the Big Steppers album. The cover features Kendrick holding Uzi while Whitney holds Enoch. Kendrick also mentioned Enoch’s name in his song “Mr. Morale” when he rapped, “Enoch, your father's just detoxed.”
Whitney Reflects on Working With Kendrick on "Mr. Morale & the Big Steppers"
In May, the makeup artist reflected on working with Kendrick on the album, which she helped narrate, and thanked him in an Instagram post. “Sometimes the mirror is a harsh critic. Shit can get real ugly. Im proud of the work we’ve done individually and as a family. Honored to be a part of this album @kendricklamar. Thank you for your transparency. Healing can begin…,” she wrote.
Whitney Appears in Kendrick's "Count Me Out" Music Video
Whitney also appeared in her beau’s “Count Me Out” music video and shared a snippet on her Instagram page in December.
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Feature image by Lester Cohen/Getty Images for NARAS